What would happen if Ayy Lmaos abducted a party of adventurers from a typical medieval fantasy setting

Are aliens real?

I would watch the shit out of this.

Several level 1 adventurers died for this post.

Fun fact: every time a alien abductee asks Jesus to protect them, the abduction experience immediate ends. This has been documented to have occurred hundreds of times.

In short, OP, the answer is simple.

I greet the Asgard and ask them to help me defeat the evil intellect devourer snake army we're facing.

A typical party would murder them all, steal their ship, then fly their ship to their home planet and murder what ever they have that passes for a government there, stealing everything along the way.

How can aliens abduct anyone if the Earth is flat?

Ye old sodomy

That's because alien abductions have never, ever happened unless we're talking about cute white women and gardeners named Pablo.

Probably because the person is actually experiencing a sleep paralysis dream and praying to higher power overrides the thought path, after all it is our own mind and it can be controlled.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_High_Crusade

Wacky shit

The same thing that happens with everyone else

That's not really alien abduction though, but more like different take on usual "ancient ruins of super-technology" that's pretty common fantasy cliche.

They would most likely think that demons took them away or consider it to be some weird religious experience. Party wizard might get what's happening, but that probably would require high level int check.

But that's not how alien abduction works. You're in a state similar sleep paralysis (because that's what it really is most likely) and thus can't do anything, but get anal probed until you're returned back to earth. Perhaps they could fight back with magic though.
Medieval flat earth is a myth (similar to dark ages) that was invented in 19th century to make religion look bad. Besides, actual flat earths are extremely rare even in fantasy settings.

>Wizard destroys flying saucer, teleports party back to the surface

How do I convert it to 5e? I need wacky shit in my life.

More like wizard takes over flying saucer and dumps party to space. I mean that thing (to a wizard) would be like most powerful magical artifact he has ever seen and thus he would be driven mad by it's power becoming the dreaded Saucermage, Destroyer of Worlds. After that he would be the ultimate antagonist in next campaign set into (50 years into future after the birth of Saucermage) post-apocalyptic nuclear wasteland where players would battle crapsack dystopic wizard-kingdoms (whose purpose is to produce resources and fuel for Saucermage's orbital kingdom) run by his minions eventually acquiring a working space rocket and invading Saucermage's orbital castle (build from the original flying saucer) in order to punch/stab/shoot him dead to save the world from his evil reign of terror.

>Saucermage
>not Sauceror
One job.

>Medieval flat earth is a myth (similar to dark ages) that was invented in 19th century to make religion look bad.

...

So why does flat earth fundamentals exist?

If they do, it is the aliens getting probed.

Because they're a relatively modern sect who adopted the myth invented by anti-religion guys as the truth. It's very ironic and stupid.

Congratulations, you've now found out the origin of the fairy tales.

Light-speed time dilation makes the "mundane world" turn centuries while you aged hours.

It's hard to find the "fairy lands" when they aren't lands to begin with.

All those fey abductions? Yeah.

Changelings? Fucking hybrids implanted to spy on humanity.

Compare old Tomb of Horrors to Tales from the Yawning Portal Tomb of Horrors to see how they change that. Take notes. Then do it yourself, customized for your party.

Because /x/ is only getting shittier.

This needs to be a thing. Why is this not a thing?

>FUCKING FEY AND THEIR FUCKING BULLSHIT, THIS IS THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK!

Fun fact: In Changeling: The Lost, it's the opposite.

All the fair folk have a boner for kidnapping humans. Some have a boner for doing it in a flying saucer and then shoving things up their ass.

You wake up and discover you have all been taken prisoner by what appear to be Illithids. They have you all strapped down to tables and are using some form of magic on you, although not harmful (for some reason your butt feels sore). One of the tables has the corpse of a dwarf who has had his brain removed. They converse in a strange language you don't understand and gesture at images of your own anatomy. You can just barely see the landscape rushing by through a window across the room. A door opens and the two strange humanoids leave; the door closes. What do you do?

Investigate the corpse more while trying to find pants.

Ever heard about Expedition to Barrier Peaks?

I think he meant the capitalization. It happens to me all the time & I hate it. As my phone tries to learn words, it thinks incidental capitalization (like st the start of a sentence) is intentional & records that word it learns as having explicit capitalization (like a name). What's worse is that it also helps to enforce that I capitalize the first letter of any instant message, even if it's just a simple response like "Lmao."

Volo's Guide has most of the notable monsters in it, if they weren't already in the Monster Manual.

From there just add in sci-fi gear from the original adventure using the rules in 5e's DMG for scifi guns, figure out how you're going to stat up power armor, and you're pretty much good to go.

>not running an X Files themed medieval fantasy game

>humans possesing demons
>xenos being kidnapped by underwater zombies
>the kings of the land are controlled by ancient golems
>Ocs raids to cover up the duke's shenanigans
>Ancestral Gods and Platonic Solids

Experiment on them to find out how long people can read your threads until dying from brain damage.

What kind of alieums we talking about?

Short or tall grays? Draco Reptilians? Nordics? Archons? Annunaki? Pleiadians?

Depends on what you mean by real.

Is there life on other planets?
Statistically, it is almost certain.

Are they here, abducting people?
I want to believe.

>implying ayys didn't invent fantasy settings because they're bored and want to see humans do things
>yfw all "magic" is drawn from psi-generators on their big ships to delude the puny earthlings into believing they have power

I imagine it would be a big relief, though, as long as they weren't illithidesque hungerers or sociopathic probers. It would be cool to see behind the curtain.

Changelings were just autistic children. All the OCD behaviors people associated with fey were from looking at autistic children.

How do you think 40k was born?

I thought changelings were shit old-timey mothers made up to explain why the kids didn't look like their father?

That can't be true because nobody would believe anything that a women says.

kek

>cuckposting

Fuck off

>Wizard Planeshifts them to the Abyss
Let's see how they like it when they're on the other side of that probe.

Spell jamming possibly up someone's butt but then that is aliens for you.

Explain the second part of your post

I've been in Veeky Forums for about 10 years now and /x/ is utterly incomprehensible to me.

At first I thought it was like s4s or /b/ style ironic shitposting but most of the stuff there is actually sincere? Most of it is just babble and literal nonsense like talking about fighting demons in their mind and cursing their neighbors

Why is /x/ so radically different from the other boards in the sense that it is just incomprehensible babble

Because those "people" are fucking insane even by Veeky Forums standards, and in all probability look like the fucking aliens or ghosts or fucking undead they all so fervently believe in because they haven't felt nor even seen natural light for so goddamn long.

Good idea. I'll see if I can't crank something out that way. Gotta get that Space shit so Conan can blast some fools.

Froghemoth Strong

>Cuck Enabler

There was that poor bastard the ayy lmaos kidnapped in the Fallout 3 DLC. Literal fucking samurai from the feudal era and recently unthawed from cryo stasis; all he did was run around babbling in broken Japanese and look for his sword.

It's literally all jokes though, like /pol/ and niggers.

Just repeating what I heard, m80.

A lot of it is just kids LARPing. There are obviously some people who actually believe that shit because Descartes' idiots quote is Veeky Forums in a nutshell, but by and large it's just people fucking around and telling stupid stories.

/x/ year one
>Guys are vampires real?
>I fap to the thought of big foot raping me
>is this a ghost?

/x/ Now
>Im a vampire ask me anything
>THIS TIME THE WORLD IS ENDING FOR SURE
> _______ is he whore of babylon, check my symbology, its clearly spelt out by annunaki george soros blood cum hermetic ritual you feeb