Anyone else having a sexual conquest on any Veeky Forums

they dont, trust me on this, they look great, but there is a lot of fat on there. You see muscle girl, you get muscle girl cover in a not-so-small layer of fat. If you are into soft it's fun, but sometimes it can be a bit disturbing

My character won in a contest of strength during a local festival. Bedded 12 women that night. They... valued strength a lot on that town. Beyond that, nah. He was an uncharismatic guy. It wasn't a priority.

does this count?
we're still together

4 mutant Chernobylite thumbs up. Good luck user.

We get it, you trip fag on an anonymous image board, now fuck off

Calling bullshit because I'm obvious incredibly jealous and insecure about my own life which leads me to doubting anyone could find such a nice match. OK bye, going to go cry into my paints now.

So I was playing a giant of a knight in a whfb/game of thrones game.

Konrad Moraig, ogre-son as the bards liked to call him.

He was 8 feet tall and 500 pounds of slab muscle.

Let that sink in, cause I didn't when I made him. He was 8 feet tall. I basically wanted to make the toughest, angrier sunovabitch I could.

Upon reviewing the stats for the GoT rpg he was significantly stronger than a giant. Something like athletics 7 strength 5.

He had 25 wounds, and 6 stamina. He was a piss poor noble, but he knew how to Take a beating.

He found success when he hit the grand tourney. Ultimately defeating the penultimate champion, a monk of morr who was taught the great sword from his earliest age. A man no one had ever bested.

Turns out he ain't shit on a horse, and I got an early injury on him, and after that I beat his ass raw around that arena.

So we're eating at a counts table and I see his daughter making eyes at Konrad, her brother warned me from her, thinking I was some kind of beast.

Well, I sent my squire to distract the brother, followed her to the scullery quarters, and then apparently fucked the shit out of her for about an hour. On the bed til it gave out, on the wall, til the cries of fear from the other side stopped me, than I just held her up and bodily and fucked her like that.

I apparently left her in a stupor to run after my sworn lord, Barry managing to make the boat.

Anyway, after some harrowing adventures I come back accused of raping her.

She told her father out of guilt and some sort of misguided attempt to force a marriage. The father demands my death for defiling her, her brother is set to duel meto the death.

seeing where this is going I ask a friendly NPC for advice and upon explaining to me the situation she immediately stated the only way to clear my name is a fight in the view of sigmar.

Which means she's going to fight my lady love. Til first yield.

>Does this count?
Only if you bone her to Highway to the Danger Zone at least once. Otherwise no deal.

Something I forgot to mention is due to his hideous appearance, the rumors of his halfblooded nature with an ogre, and various monstrous abuses heaped upon him Konrad was a kissless virgin.

So he had fallen in love with the the first woman to come along who didn't wince at his coming into the light.

So carrying on, Lady bear wins the duel, I am deemed honourable in the eyes of the gods and all charges against me are laid to waste.

I still ask for her hand in marriage after. This proves to the father I was true to my word and in his eyes at least his daughter was a whore and a liar. So he bans her out of his house forever!

We married, then Konrad became emperor the end.

That is one of the shittiest storys that I have ever read on Veeky Forums.

This isn't exactly a riddle for the ages here

Not very nice,
Its bad, but I have seen a hell of a lot worse.

so like...how far do you guys usually go when you delve into this sort of stuff. do you mention casually during your games that you banged someone? or do you like...rp the sex...with other dudes.

RPing sex is definitely in the camp of "don't do it, unless you're sure they're cool with it". Groups I've been with prefer "fade to black" at the moments when we all know what's up.

do you at least have real girls voicing the female npcs?

>not very nice

cry me a river tea boy.

What I meant is : don't do it, unless you know they want it. That goes for the gender of the speaker, as well as the content of what is being said. If your group can't deal with a dude RPing a girl, then they probably can't deal with a love scene anyways.

But instead of stating "that" did or didn't happen, you just skip to the next part of the story. Let the guys who want to imagine a sex scene do so, and let the rest don't.

no I understand that perfectly and I 100% agree, I was more asking if straight dudes rp with other straight dudes about fictional characters having sex. I have personally never experienced this and can't fathom the amount of cringe that would be present in the room.

Swimming excersizes every muscle in the body, just as squats do.

There is nothing in the world sexier than a powerful woman.

>mfw I'm bisexual and never shy away from roleplaying female NPCs flirt heavily with my all straight male players party
I mean, they love how I carefully handle NPC interactions. It is just a matter of finding a good balance and not be cringe-worthy, but then again if you are, you probably can not roleplay very well in first place...

>tea boy.

What kind of shitty insult is this?

Jeez user don't regale us with story time or anything.

Fade to black. I GM'd a few folks who requested private ERP, so I've done it. It doesn't interest me, but it doesn't gross me out or anything.

Can someone help me understand something?

>DM creates a priestess character to help out our party
>Turns out she's a lesbian and attracted to our catgirl shifter (played by a dude and with a Japanese name)
>The catgirl never makes a roll to notice
>Eventually they end up alone studying a book about werewolves
>DM does the usual "roll to pick up the hint, you don't understand" thing
>But then he does it again
>And again
>And again
>Five minutes straight of trying to force the relationship in
>The player seems in on it but keeps fucking up
>Eventually they finally get it on after all this shit
>Fade to a midnight battle with the rest of our party while the shifter fucks the priestess in a different house
>DM later claims he balanced the fight for a full party fight
>Four shadow creatures
>There would've been four of us in the room if our Cleric made it that day

What the fuck do I even do? It's a fucking weird magical realm kind of thing going on, but they both seem to be trying to get it going even though the shifter's roleplaying is basically just "I say what I want to happen and roll."

Board is so lame now. My greatest fear is that all the sensible grognards were snuffed out one by one for stumbling upon some dark secret.

Except for a large group of powerful women who use you as their communal whore.

TRIPFAG LEAVE

Did anyone save the story from the Fat Characters thread from a few days ago? The one with the chick tricked into jerking a dude off while he sucked on her tits in front of the group during a session?