Why hasn't anyone yet tried to break into Slaanesh's palace?
I think it'd be a great story for someone to have passed all the trials of self-restraint, blindfolded themselves in the palace, and then to demand one thing of the prince of pleasure: to hold his/her hand.
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>to hold his/her hand.
That's too lewd, even for Slaanesh.
Kaldor Drago did once, it ended with him getting buttsex.
Go back to /d/ you sick fuck!
Isn't Slaneesh pretty much an anime character?
Isn't he quite literally Ashura? By the way don't google ashura.
Why do we like anime? I hate anime..
they already kicked me out
Slaanesh would be aroused by the excessively tame request.
>Isn't he quite literally Ashura?
If only they were Baron Ashura from Robot Girls Z...
Id rather work hard to earn her invitation
You need help.
>to hold his/her hand.
T-THAT'S FORBIDDEN LOVE!
The Palace of Slaanesh is closed. The inhabitants of the rings of pleasure and excess that surround it are unaware of the secret that it now hides. So are the Prince of Excess' most exalted Daemon Princes, who now find their way barred.
The Palace is empty. Slaanesh is dead. Has been for a long time. By plasma and pulse did the alien race known as the Tau finally destroy the youngest God of Chaos
Hey this seems like a good place to ask, where should I go to read more about the realms of the various chaos God's? Any codex in particular I should give a look?
Its not about getting in, its about escaping.
Fuck off, you just had to ruin such a good build up.
Chaos Daemons or the Liber Daemonica, I think.
Thank you. Any idea which generals megas I should go poking around in to find those?
The 40k general should have what you need.
Look in the daemon codex, it's been tried
I-imagine being the one guy who gets to Slaanesh and sees her/him/it in modest clothing, but with a little bit of ankle showing!
dead meme
>with a little bit of ankle showing!
user THAT IS HARAM
A so called silver knight did so, passed all of slaanesh's temptations, and met Slaanesh hirself. As a beautiful young boy.
They fell to chaos.
that's exactly what i was refering with ''it's been tried''
Still waiting for my package of bits so i can make my Slaaneshi silver knight conversion
Haha, maybe she would even show some wrist, wouldn't that be funny, haha
>but with a little bit of ankle showing!
>demand to hold his/her hand.
Don't you realize that these are fundamentally identical in motive as requesting sum fuk? Just because it's unexpectedly more tame than what anyone would expect doesn't mean it isn't based on lust. You may as well just go in there and demand to fuck the literal shit out of Slaanesh. You're falling to chaos either way.
>Why hasn't anyone yet tried to break into Slaanesh's palace?
>I think it'd be a great story for someone to have passed all the trials of self-restraint, blindfolded themselves in the palace, and then to demand one thing of the prince of pleasure:
>ONE THING
"So, let's settle this once and for all - what's your opinion on skub?"
>I think it'd be a great story for someone to have passed all the trials of self-restraint, blindfolded themselves in the palace
It would be over before it ever began. You think Slaanesh's power merely effects the visual? Your other senses, enhanced by depriving yourself of vision, would force you into The Prince of Pleasure's service with alluring scents, pleasurable sounds, the very taste of the air itself, heavy with a sweet yet sexually savory taste, would send you into throes of dizzying bliss. You would attempt to steady yourself against a wall, only to feel it quiver and writhe under your touch.
Should you ever hold the hand of Slaanesh you would fall even quicker to your knees than Kaldor Drago did when he laid eyes upon Slaanesh's comely form.
Anti-skub, obv.
>tfw no Slaanesh GF(male/female) to hold hands with
>implying
Better question; why haven't the Necron entered the warp and started killing all the Chaos Gods? I think that would be worth an alliance with the Eldar just to access the Webway.
Because they wish the destruction of all life other than them, because they're a bag of radioactive dicks.
It's kinda sad that the only races that understand diplomacy is the Eldar and Tau.
But aren't the Chaos Gods technically life and, more importantly, big important life? Wouldn't the Necron consider them to be a bigger and more important target than the Eldar? Or are the Necron just a bunch of robotic idiots?
I wonder what happens to the daemons from the other gods when they invade slaneeshi's realm as part of the great game?
Can Khornate Daemons be tempted by the lures of the flesh? Can the daemons of the plaguefather be diverted by promises of sweet foods and music? Do tzeentchian daemons with their presumably deep understanding of the lord of excess's defences, still fall to then anyway?
I think Slaanesh probably lets people through fairly often, (s)he'd get kind of bored just sitting around with the same sex slaves and food and whatever all the time, as getting through all the trials would be super hard to do. So like once in a while (s)he'd just let some random guy through, he'd be all relieved that he made it though the trials that seemed super easy, and then he'd see her at the other end of some throne room or whatever.
But he's just some random dude that happened to wander in, so even at 100 meters away he already can't resist her, not that anyone else could either. And (s)he obviously has a dick, whether or not you think (s)he's male or female. And from across the room, the guy thinks that yeah it's a bit gay, but it's small and cute, definitely a feminine penis, so it's cool.
Now he's sort of speedwalking to Slaanesh's end of the room, and he realizes that (s)he's not as small and petite as he thought from far away, (s)he's actually around 6'2, not counting the horns. He's a bit troubled maybe, because he's only 5'11.75, but is already in love with Slaanesh so he wouldn't really care. But once he's about 10 meters away and his pants are coming off, he realizes that her dick isn't as small as it seemed either.
Stumbling towards Slaanesh the guy looks down at his dick and back to hers, and realizes that it must be something like 9 or 10 inches, though it is uncut and perfectly smooth, ivory with a slight pink tint to it. He stumbles, his pants are around his feet, and lands on his face. When he looks up, Slaanesh is right above him, and he sees her dick close up finally, it's somewhere between the thickness of one of those thin redbull cans, and a normal pop can, the kind that most people definitely can't fit in their anus. However, it's too late. She's on top of him, and his pants are already down. His anus isn't even self-lubricating, unlike Slaanesh's. And in the end, there's so much blood that Khorne pops a semi.
that was a wonderful read
So? Next time send a straight Knight
I once had a story a while ago where a Tech priest did this. He fell for an illusion of a working STC computer and was sent back to infect the Imperium with his large collection of demon tech he was utterly convinced were real and would change the Imperium.
that actually sounds neat, but when you said sent back to infect, i thought you'd have followed it up with high-tech sex toys
WHY would you ever think of escaping?
1)endless love from all the cute girls you'll never have in real space
2)endless drugs where you will be blissed without having ever to succumb to bodily harm from hard drugs
3)endless sex from all the cuties you ever wished for even bolter bitches and where your wildest sexual fantasies come true and then some
4)You will look hawt, handsome, macho and the epitome of a MANLY MAN
Come on user, Slaanesh's Palace is a FUN and AWESOME place~ No restraints, No Limits only FUN FUN FUN~!!!
Because you can't kill a chaos god by simply shooting it.
Killing off all non-Necron life is the simplest way to kill the Chaos gods. No life means nothing for the Chaos gods to feed upon. Then they starve.
>The Bad Moon
What kinky things does a moon get up to ?
>sweat smells like bacon
Because Anime does not exist in the 41st Millenium.
If it did, all you'd have to do is send a 2Dfag or Waifufag to Slaanesh's Palace and wait for it to turn into a waifu, or otherwise a living hentai manga that shows the reader whatever it wants to see in whatever artists style ever, mode of coloring or otherwise.
This, would in fact, fucking Kill Slaanesh, or basically reduce it to a living fucking manga of questionable content and all it's followers and Daemons would snuff it to boot.
Using the ultimate expression of 2D, one could use it to predict the future though pornographic scenarios correlating to events in the materium.
>Kaldor Drago did once, it ended with him getting buttsex.
Completely untrue.
Draigo did manage to get to the point where he could slay Slaneesh itself but in the end he couldn't bring himself to do it, because the balance shift Slaneesh's death would cause to the forces of chaos would be so immerse that on Chaos god could overthrow the other two and in the end it could being ruin to the galaxy. He came to the conclusion that for the time being the more fragmented the forces of Chaos are the better it is for the Galaxy. He wasn't defeated at all in fact he actually slew Slaneesh's six chosen Deamonettes, mind you since Slaanesh didn't die the Deamonettes were reborn later.
In the end the main result of Draigo's story is that everything he does is ultimately futile because no matter how much damage he does to chaos in the Warp all will be healed and undone in time and he mustn't slay the Chaos gods even if he actually could because the consequences would be so dire.
Khorne please go and be paraplegic somewhere else.
>If it did, all you'd have to do is send a 2Dfag or Waifufag to Slaanesh's Palace and wait for it to turn into a waifu, or otherwise a living hentai manga that shows the reader whatever it wants to see in whatever artists style ever, mode of coloring or otherwise.
>This, would in fact, fucking Kill Slaanesh, or basically reduce it to a living fucking manga of questionable content and all it's followers and Daemons would snuff it to boot.
>Implying this wouldn't cause Slaanesh to make Anime Real
Which Chaos gods are pro-skub and which are anti-skub, in your opinion?
What's Malal's opinion on skub?
Wait are you saying that a mere adeptus astartes was in a position to kill a god? How does that work?
>Kaldor Draigo
>a mere adeptus astartes
Not sure if you are trolling or just don't know Draigo
>By the way don't google ashura.
what happens if I do?
>what happens if I do?
THIS!
That's a funny way of saying "Slaanesh turned into a comely young man and Kaldor dropped to his knees and got to sucking."
So Kaldor is a massive Gary Stu?
I mean he DID slobber all over Slaanesh's nob directly. That IS pretty Stu-ish.
Even funnier that what you say never happened.
He is exactly that, after all he was created by our lord and master the almighty Matt Ward
Also pic related is much more ironic to see today.
REIKA KITAMI of animu
>only the strong will get this reference
he already did his job