Hey Veeky Forums this is going to sound very fetishy but I promise you it's not...

Hey Veeky Forums this is going to sound very fetishy but I promise you it's not. I need some reason why elves would prefer anal intercourse over any other kind, can you help me out?

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blogs.discovermagazine.com/notrocketscience/2009/12/22/ballistic-penises-and-corkscrew-vaginas-the-sexual-battles-of-ducks/#.WVADqNzavcs
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Cause they're faggots.

>I need some reason why elves would prefer anal intercourse over any other kind, can you help me out?

If they had Cloaca's, technically normal intercourse for them would be anal.

Prevent birth.
No g spot in vagina.
Their god loves poop.

The exotic appeal.

maybe the elves believe that vaginal intercourse is only for conception

Well no, it would be cloacal.

>I need some reason why elves would prefer anal intercourse over any other kind, can you help me out?

Another thing that comes to mind is male elves could just have really, really, large prostates and testicles, so anal for them is basically mashing that cum button. Our prostate is about the size of a walnut and we're the way we are because of that.
Imagine if it was the size of an apple.

Elven culture has diluted over the years, with human influence.
The recent advent of human porn and pop stars has led to younger, naive elves seeking new pleasure.
Simply put, it's trendy and confused elf pop stars are doing it on stage.

To elves it's simply another thrill, but human males flock to elf-pop concerts for their own sexual fantasies, leading to a cultural rivalry between traditional performers and newer, accidentally perverse elvish 'entertainers'.

I mean, who'd have thought the poop hole would make for such fun?
Not us elves

Elves are pretty fertile but their pregnancies last long and are exceedingly uncomfortable, and their childbirth is painful and often lethal. So they look for other forms of satisfaction instead.

You've got some answers, now my request to you OP can you explain why you needed those reasons and how it's not fetishy?

I love it.

There are hundreds of thousands of nerve endings in the anus. It's not just about smashing dat prostate, even for men.

It's to do with a drug smuggling ring, but I need it to be plausible that elves regularly get fucked up the ass.

It's the latest hot new fad.

>There are hundreds of thousands of nerve endings in the anus. It's not just about smashing dat prostate, even for men.

No, I get that. If anal didn't feel good in general we wouldn't poop, etc, I understand that.

I'm just saying having a bigger prostate might make 'that' difference.

Nigga you dumb as fuck. Why do people like getting fucked in the ass? Because they like it.

The answer is literally that fucking simple, because it's enjoyable.

>If anal didn't feel good in general we wouldn't poop
I think you're taking an argument too far for it to still make sense.

Don't call me nigga bruh.

Over the many years of elf evolution, female elves and their ancestors, due to being raped and enslaved so much, evolved a vagina that would rip apart any penis inserted into it. Anal is now common for recreational sex, and vaginal is only used when a male is willing to sacrifice themselves or at best their penis to make a child, also explaining the typical low birth rates in one fell swoop.

Don't call me bruh, buddy.

Don't call me buddy, cat.

Don't call me cat, dawg.

FPBP

This picture is deeply unsettling to me. Even when I enlarge it and see the flowers, I am still very uncomfortable while looking at it.

Send help.

Don't call me dawg, rodent.

How about this; the Elven vagina is equipped with powerful muscles and certain other defenses (can't be assed to think them up) that makes sex outside of specific breeding seasons impossible. Therefore, if an Elven woman is incapable of getting cock in their cunt, they'll have to settle for anal.

>due to being raped and enslaved so much, evolved a vagina that would rip apart any penis inserted into it.
That doesn't make sense. That would lessen the number of truebred elves the ones who struggle more are more likely to be killed compared to the ones who don't struggle, and thus they will survive and have a bigger chance to breed with other elves by out living their captors.

The elves who breed true no matter what their person they are being fucked by are also likely to be populous. You'd have a race of elves who no matter fucks them produce more elves.

Specifically, female elves breeding more female elves.

Elves (both gender) have 10 more prostates compared to humans (e.g. elf males have 11) so anal feels really good from the prostate stim.

Also, considering that most of the fluid in an ejaculation is produced by the prostate, this has some VERY interesting consequences.

>If anal didn't feel good in general we wouldn't poop
what did he mean by this

how about if they had duck vaginas? it wouldn't kill a man but if you're not looking to make a baby the butt is just the easier option

why do i have many dog ass pics?

p-post more please

Elves live for ages, so they've evolved to engage in non-conceptional sex a lot in order to preserve population levels. Without this mechanism, they'd quickly breed, spread and devour everything around them, leading to mass famine.

In modern times, the urge to not copulate is even stronger due to how stable civilized life is, and how easily population levels can increase if left unchecked.

one(1) more, just for you

I thought a dog would wear pants around all four legs...

got 'em

The thing that makes women like anal is like, a membrane of tissue I foret the name off that's between the back of the vag and anal canal. In elves, this is more concentrated.

The other reason is that due to the more sophisticated intestinal tract, and digestion system, elves do not eat that many carbohydrates as a load of bread to an elf is like, overeating for them.

To note, the Elven anus is far more effective than a humans in that it has little to no Anal fissure, and piles, hemorrhoids and the like are completely unheard of, which is something that adds to their already slender and athletic body types.

Also, the series of rings for chopping up fecal matter are stronger opposed to a humans, so Elves again, poo with grace.

Anal sex wise, it's tight, but is not Nearly as much of a hassle to get into opposed to human anal, which takes roughly a days preparation to some hours before copulation anyhow with all the lubrication, enema and stretching done though use of toys.

Also, because of the canonical Elven sexual experimentation phase in their lifetimes, so anal will eventually come up, and they will be desperate to try it.

Childhood for an elf is considerably longer, meaning a much bigger economic strain on the parents.

Wait, shit, I forgot about the loli phase, some start early or get married off early, so anal is pretty much the only option at that phase, so I guess the sexual conduct can begin at almost any phase.

Anal sex sucks compared to vaginal, the only people who insist otherwise are homosexuals trying to defend their hobby and virgins.

Why would homosexuals be wanting to defend virgins via insisting on the supreriority of anal sex?

GOD DAMMIT MY GRAMMAR WENT ALL SIDEWAYS

If that's true then why do women like receiving anal so much?

They don't.

Some definitely do.

As was mentioned, prostates. The males have larger and more developed prostates than humans do, and the women have larger clits where the internal bits have four terminal ends instead of two, so they get crazy stimulated by vaginal and anal.

And it's a big cultural anti taboo, because they recently threw off the time of a repressive fundamentalist Christian esque human cult that was all about "sex only for procreation" and they're reclaiming their heritage/thumbing their noses at their former oppressors, while having really great sex.

And, hell, why not. Elf anuses produce enzymes that are a direct chemical stimulus to dicks, further enhancing the experience

Don't don't call me rodent man-thing

because they have magic assholes that have more nerve endings than other races and never lose their stretch. Also grabbing an elve's ears while you penetrate their ass triggers and instant orgasm.

/thread

I prefer vaginal, but you know what's best? Variety. So we usually save anal for her period.

So hey, maybe Elfin vaginas are only "open" (say, sufficiently relaxed) two days a year, and only the women know when their days are.

High elves theoretically abstain for all but those two days, finding solace in poetry and craftsmanship. The real story behind closed doors in more complicated. They're basically Protestants.

Wood elves delight in sodomy and sing cheerful woodland songs about it. They're basically Italians.

Dark elves... find ways to stimulate themselves vaginally all year around; ways that are painful and degrading to everyone involved. And they also love it up the ass. They're basically the 1%.

Oh gosh, there's an unfortunate case of left-my-name-on.

Cheerful woodland songs about sodomy?

In one of my modern-ish settings, elves are basically the top dog because of their longevity and experience. Because they're basically biologically immortal, having kids is considered a waste of time in a modern society where there's no real danger of being killed en masse. It's especially taboo because you could be using the time spent rearing a child by doing research and enhancing society instead.

Because they are based on Moche mesoamericans?

Or maybe elves get tired of having the same thing for, say, 120 years.

Ye Gawds, it's the duck all over again.

blogs.discovermagazine.com/notrocketscience/2009/12/22/ballistic-penises-and-corkscrew-vaginas-the-sexual-battles-of-ducks/#.WVADqNzavcs

> O, what are you doing?
> And where are you going?
> It's time to get screwing!
> My penis is growing!
> O! tra-la-la-lally
> here up the back alley!
>
> O! What are you seeking,
> And where are you making?
> The faggots are singing,
> The girls' bums are shaking!
> O! tril-lil-lil-lolly
> the back door is jolly,
> ha! ha!
>
> O! Where are you going
> With dicks all a-wagging?
> No knowing, no knowing
> What brings Mister OP,
> And Bruh, Cat, and Buddy
> down here to the party
> in June
> ha! ha!
>
> O! Soft rectal ridges
> And tight squeezing butthole
> Keeps Wood Elf boys rigid
> And Elf lasses joyful
>
> To fly would be folly
> The sodomy's jolly
> And bugger and come
> All up in her bum
> to our tune
> ha! ha!

This.

Because elven culture is high-minded to a fault and values art and artifice above all else. Anal sex is completely free from utilitarianism, it serves no purpose other than creating pleasure for the participants. It's the purest form of artistic intercourse.

>I need plausible reasons for an entire race to prefer anal over vaginal
>Because I need to justify some drug smuggling ring.

I don't get it.