I need to make the most "fuck you" dungeon possible. How do I go about it?

Make X a piece of paper proclaiming the power of friendship that was a part of the group all along.

>How blatant do you want the fuck you to be?
I need it to come off as at least somewhat legitimate. Like Tomb of Horrors.

So run Tomb of fucking Horrors

Like I said. Unsolvable maze, but there is a secret door hidden down some side passage that leads to the treasure room.

>What the fuck man this is bullshit there is nothing here, you've been jerking us around
>Naw man, look at the map I had drawn up in advance. Not my fault you to stupid to find a hidden room. What, you think the guy who made this to hide his treasure would make it easy for you? Fuck you man, there's no free lunch.

One of my friends already ran the 5e edition, and it didn't work. Half because the DM gave us a ton of dosh for magic stuff, and half because 5e characters just don't die.

>carefully concealed highly-lethal traps everywhere
>every potential goody has a curse of some sort
>riddles and puzzles to open doors
>maze that requires the use of teleporters to get through
>horrible monsters at every turn
>could have bypassed it all if they "just payed attention and used that one clue"
>loot is "the treasure of real friendship"

Have everything in the maze be just a bit above their recommended difficulty, with the gap between them and the monsters slowly increasing as they go further in until it becomes so large it would be suicide to fight what they encounter as they get deep in the maze. Make them turn back thinking that they can't get to the treasure and will have to come back later. Reveal later that the treasure was in fact in a hidden room near the entrance of the maze, that they walked right past it, and that all the fighting and suffering they did further in was completely pointless. .

Hypercube

A cluster of bear traps, one of which triggers all of them magically transforming into actual bears.

Get something made by Gary Gygax.

The most "fuck you" dungeon possible would be creating one similar to what said, in that the treasure should be at the entrance, with largely difficult beasts inside.

It could even be a maze designed to destroy those who are greedy or lust for power. Occasionally, there will be gifts or trinkets, of increasing value as you go further in. Not ever worth all the fighting and potential death, but still consolation rewards. If you take it and leave, you're okay. If you take them and keep going, you activate curses, traps, etc. Pretty much, it's filled with a few hints that staying isn't worth it, but has just enough loot that isn't trapped/cursed that they feel compelled to go further.

The plot twist can be the thing they actually need is all the way where they are going, like a heirloom hidden beyond all the monsters. Or even better, there is a secret teleportation thing from the front to the back, as a mark of prudence or something similar.

Either which way, it should be a dungeon with a legitimate solution that is designed to hurt the fool-hardy/those who are murder hobos anyway.

Tucker's Kobolds, motherfucker.

tuckerskobolds.com/

more specifically, get Tomb of Horrors

Fair enough.

see

oh my fucking god had a good kek at this

>and it didn't work
Neither did the original, at Gygax's table: they just herded NPCs through traps and made off with a couple of bags full of treasure while Acererak was distracted by the rest of the NPCs. The first time someone 'beat' Tomb of Horrors was pretty much a slapstick smash-and-grab. May as well have been directed by Guy Ritchie.

Yeah, Gygax's own group was pretty used to his bullshit by the time they ran that.
Didn't he also have a Rogue that clung to the ceiling through the entire dungeon to avoid his traps?

My uncle ran DnD campaigns for my father and his friends/brothers when they were in HS, and by far the worst thing they all agree upon that he ever threw their way was a massive labyrinth, populated solely by gelatinous cubes that fit perfectly in the corridors
from what I've heard, there were no survivors

The unironic answer is Death Frost Doom.

You go into the dungeon? You cause an apocalypse. You don't go in to the dungeon? Your real life friends hate you because they wanted a night of gaming.

>Then we shall put spikes on the ceiling Nikolai
>But Viktor, cant they hold onto spikes?
>Not if they come out of ceiling Nikolai. Come, let me show you this book...
dnd.rem.uz/3.5 D&D Books/Stronghold Builder's Guidebook.pdf

fuck off, i dont have the bandwidth to upload this
and do the work to determine what doesn't work in 5e so you can be happy. still better than anything 5e has...

Also, just for flavour, i would add the good old combination of rust monster + slime cube (forgot the actual name)

somewhat like he said, but put soemthign like a wise guardian of the dungeon at the begginning, who tires to talk the party out of it, but says there are great treasures inside,if they survive the dungeon the final room is a teleport to the entrance, the final treasure was realizing how the pnly important thing was licing life and enjoying even without riches, loving your friends and understanding how truly important they are(bonus point if they lost a friend inside). Nothing players hate more then morality lessons.

Come up with challenges they cannot beat with rolls. How much Morse Code do you know? A enemy that can only be subdued by saying a passphrase, the only way past a trap is to sacrifice some artifact to it.

this. because in the end it all ended up being a dream.

Make the dungeon completely submerged in water, so only the Druid and Wizard can play leaving the martials twiddling their thumbs for the entire game night. How that for a fuck you?

Just put in several puzzles without any form of clue as to how they're supposed to be solved or even that they're there to begin with. For example, the party enters a room with three doors, make it so that if they inspect them closely they could reasonably discover that two of them would lead to their death. The third one simply leads them in a circle or something equally bullshitty. The correct door is actually a hidden trapdoor which can only be opened by some incredibly convoluted method.

Or, the party enters a room with an obvious treasure within it. Supposedly this comes right after they've had a decently difficult encounter so they'd naturally assume that this treasure is their reward. However, as soon as a character touches it it's instant death. No save. No nothing. Dead. The correct answer is to simply ignore the treasure and move along.

And so on.

The loot they are after is the only thing holding up the ceiling.

>so only the Druid and Wizard can play leaving the martials twiddling their thumbs for the entire game night
So nothing changes?

Have you played LISA?

I didn't want to make my own thread since this one's already up

What's the best puzzle you've ever encountered? I want to make a fairly difficult dungeon (not a fuck-you dungeon but still hard) but I'm shit at coming up with puzzles.

everyone has been telling OP to run Tomb of Horrors

pick something from the tomb of horrors and be done with it

>Make the dungeon completely submerged in water

lol are you even trying?

I'm disappointed nobody posted this.

I was hoping you had a specific example in a game you liked but I guess you haven't had that many games you've liked

This. Utterly nihilistic.

Think practically.

Why did the dungeon exist before it became overrun by monsters?
Why was this puzzle put in place?
Did something go wrong in the dungeon and so the "puzzle" is more natural?

Hypercube 2 was a bad movie but it did feature a timeloop tessaract instead of a sliding rugby superstructure.

Don't forget to ask: How did the creator of this dungeon plan to get passed the trap(s) ?

Let me tell you a little bit about a pet project of mine that never really get off the ground.

It was a re-imaging of Night Below in the Spelljammer setting.

The final dungeon was going to basically be what you would get if you took a solar system with a seriously dense asteroid belt and converted that belt into an infinite, labyrinthine, abyssal network of lightless, water-filled colonies populated by pissed-off Aboleth in the process of building a megastructure sized Tower of Domination.

Tomb of Horrors.

Mix typical treasures and treasure bugs together.
Make the entrance door a mimic as well as other objects other than the usual chest.

I made a dungeon which actually had two dungeons. One was a the actual dungeon area the players wanted to get to, but getting there required the correct resolution of a puzzle, any incorrect solution appeared to allow progression but actually led to a false dungeon, that looked more or less like a real dungeon, but was full of horrendous bullshit traps and monsters and inbetween things like rugs of smothering.

Check out Deadly Treasure in Dungeon issue 41. The treasure, instead of being in a room at the end, is given to the tomb guardians to help with defense.

You end up destroying most of the treasure on your way in.

Then you should consider stepping away from the game and being a better person, like Mr. Rogers would've wanted.

>Mr. Rogers
Any person who comes across as so genuinely kindhearted and nice has got to have something seriously sinister to hide. I'm not saying he buried raped Vietnamese boys in his basement, but he probably raped Vietnamese boys in his basement.

Cannon in the door way

the entrance dumps you onto a mobius strip, going nowhere and with no escape.

Who hasn't?

Build up to it first. Give PCs what they want. Insanely powerful items, high levels, hundreds of hooker wives, whatever. Just make sure that there's one thing that everyone wants above all else in the dungeon, one thing they're invested in, that the players themselves care about, make it feel like a finale, and end to the story and ultimate treasure or victory. Then set up a time and place to meet, work out details like snacks, timetables, books and dice, any extra fun stuff ahead of time.
Then don't show up.

Make an entire section filled with hidden teleporters that move the characters back and forth whenever stepped on, and possibly one that teleports them straight into a boss battle.

I had this idea for a room in a dungeon.
>tall, maybe 20' tall, cylindrical room
>walls, ceiling, and floor are perfectly smooth
>exit is just ahead of the entrance
>when someone enters, a mechanism engages and creates an anti-gravity field
>now everyone is floating in a giant stone tube with no way of just climbing down without magic

I've run it. It's not really all that bad. Players figured it out well enough to not be lost between session one and two. Didn't really figure out an efficient way of getting where they wanted to be because we all had to go separate ways, but they got the basics really fast.

It's not fuck you enough really. If the teleporter/levers changed the target destination every time you used them it would be a fuck you dungeon. Fuck you dungeons have inconsistent rules.

THIS. THESE ARE THE WORST KINDS OF PEOPLE... CARRIED THE PARTY, GOT SOME NICE STUFF AND THEN "Sorry, guys, Im not feeling it anymore"

...

Oh god that thing has multiple floors too.

Tomb of Horrors is a pretty good way of going about it.

These. Make it solvable, and make at least three clues for every obstacle they must pass. Also have a way of moving the action forward if they get stuck, eg. the dungeon is filling with poison gas and it just went up a notch.

grimtooth's traps supplements?

This. Generate one on donjon.bin

By knowing the solution?

...

Not just ordinary bears either. But Owlbears.

Make a hard dungeon with some good loot at the end. Tell your players it was just a dream.

rpgcharacters.wordpress.com/2016/01/29/the-dungeon-of-fu-full-level-set/

My brain hurts.

Make it stop!

not just ordinary owlbears either. but owlbears with gatling lasers.

Make the teleporters follow a non-random but hard to predict sequence

e.g. say we have a dungeon of cardinality |N| ,have each teleporter maintain an internal counter C initialised to a random value and incrementing by the sum of the adjacent rooms ID numbers * the number of people being teleported, every time a person or group teleports through. Then modulus that by the total number of rooms and that's your destination teleporter ID

It's still a fuck-you but at least it's not impossible to solve

If a stick can hold a boulder like that the dude won't have a problem lifting it and getting out of there

>>"Attention" is the name of a gargoyle the party finds in the maze; if they just pay him their party funds he leads them through the maze. If they attack and kill him it's impossible to find.

"Should have paid Attention."

Nah, DFD's still a good dungeon shell even if you reduce the number of zombies by a couple orders of magnitude. Well, the revised version is.

The key gimmick to a dungeon like that is 'traps' to the party aren't really traps to the dungeon dwellers. Cursed messages carved into the walls in black speech? The equivalent of stained glass in a cathedral.

Some good examples I've seen are things like false handholds over a pit, and authorised entrants know to skip rungs 3 and 8. Another is a simple back entrance.

On the topic of LotFP, a 'dungeon' I read in one of their modules was a delightful fuck-you, but the kind that's more fun to read than to play.

A tower and a message. 'Climb the tower and kiss the princess to awaken her! Win the lady's hand in marriage!'

Four floors. One window at the top, one door at the bottom. Dress in ceremonial robes in the foyer, climb the stairs, pass through the magical barrier into the princess' room and kiss her!

If you try to breach or pass the barrier before disarming and wearing the ceremonial robes, the tower guards (knight statues?) will attack while chiding you for 'bringing violent tools into such a pure place.'

Whether you fight into the bedchamber or wear the robes, the 'princess' is a lich or vampire or powerful medusa orsomething similar in disguise. It's purely a trap.

The window to the top floor leads into a pitch black room covered waist deep in needles, concealed by illusion magic. This room doesn't connect to the real bedchamber, it's just a trap for those trying to circumvent the barrier.

tl;dr the tower's a trap, the princess is a captive monster in disguise, there's no treasure and one 'entrance' is a portal to the elemental plane of knives.

The floor turns into lava every 15 seconds.

Ruined nuclear reactor. When they kill the boss they also die from radiation poisoning.

...

>Everyone starts at base level
>Sandy desert with 3 caves you can enter
>All lead to giant sand worms that can't be killed by a low level party
>10 in each path
>Turning away will reveal 50 sandworms behind them, forcing them to enter one
No friends after that

That's because you are a cynical and jaded asshole so far lost in irony because of your personal suffering that you lost sight of the fact that all your pain is your own doing.
You choose to be a edgelord just as much as he chose to be a genuinely good person.

So par for the course on Veeky Forums.

This

Any square stepped on (or floated on or even poked, this includes squares of open air, walls, and ceiling) turns into negative space after 2 rounds. Anything that touches negative space is erased from existance. People wouldnt even know you fell into it, or anything else.

The party must constantly move, even in combat. Negative space surpresses any forms of plane travel or teleportation within a 1 mile radius. Monsters within the dungeon do not create negative space, abd are not effected by it.

easy way:
just make a dungeon, where they immidiatle die by falling rocks

or you can just recreat the second great dungeon from Arifureta (japanese webnovel/lightnovel, manga adaption is also in the making)
and... the chapters where the dungeon appeared is removed, cause the novel was licensed
well yeah, maybe you can just wait until the manga is at this point

what I can remember so far, the dungeon lowered/prohibited the use of magic, always swapped or changed his room, the party often got teleported at the beginning of the dungeon, and had some trolololol notes from the dungeonmaster inside

>and half because 5e characters just don't die.
Blame Mearls, Critical Roll, and their combined forces of pandering to normalfags who can't stand their actions in a game having any consequence. You literally cannot die in Adventurer's League D&D. You basically just get insta-rezzed and reset.

I bought this a long time ago. Because internet wasnt invented.

annarchive.com/files/Grimtooth's Traps.pdf

oh and rotating/moveable puzzle dungeons are a PITA, especially if you fuck around with gravity so its all Escher.

run the Apocalypse Stone.

>easy way:
>just make a dungeon, where they immidiatle die by falling rocks
That's what I was thinking. Or orb of canalization/whatever.