Have you ever made a character who just fucked up everything?

I did. I'm playing an elf who got kicked out of Elf-Nazi club for being too extreme and calling Elf-Hitler the equivalent of a Jew-fucker. So now I'm a fanatical, comically racist elf whose only job is to make it through her exile while retaining the dignity of her people in some desert shithole full of retarded sand-humans. Oh, and not fuck any of them. Because that'd be the one thing that would render her a total hypocrite and make any dignified return to the Elf-SS impossible.

Five sessions in she's pregnant with some disinherited prince's babby because she has poor impulse control and drinks. You had one job. ONE. Job. I live in dread of the day when I have to go back to the NatElfSoc club and try to cover all of this up.

don't try so hard next time

I guess the upside is that if you don't believe me, I don't have to be embarrassed for admitting I fucked up this hard.

Nah. Don't won't to be accused of self-inserting.

Not everything.
But my guy was a knight sworn to the god of death/sleep/dreams and shit and we stumbled upon a store that sold some lowkey magical items. My character was interested in an urn filled with ashes and purchased it to bury it at the next proper graveyard.
So on our way to the next town my guy had a prophetic dream of sorts, basically my DM handed me a note saying I dreamed of a skull, water falling down, etc., can't remember exactly, but it was some cryptic shit.
Now, instead of doing the obvious, that is keeping that damn urn safe and shut, I completely misinterpreted the dream and while the rest of the party was shopping in a black market that had been set up in an old temple of one of the settings main gods (and which my religious shmock of course wouldn't enter) I openen the urn and let a single drop of water fall into it.
Next thing the party saw when they stepped out of the temple was me, standing weapon in hand, next to a twirling cloud of ashes that slowly assambled into an evil looking skeleton.
Said skeleton then summoned a sick chariot drawn by skele horses and rode off south.

Cool analogy.

Not so much of an analogy considering Euron Greyjoy is now basically using the Eye of Sauron as his personal coat of arms and wears spiky black Valyrian steel armor while Aegon VI is an isolated prince trained solely for rulership in secret given his long-lost ancestral sword as he goes to reclaim his throne. Martin's doing a faux-LotR reference thing to go with his setting's existing faux-Elric of Melnibone and faux-Conan in the history.
Aegon even SOUNDS like Aragorn for god's sake.

I made a superpowered Hulk in Mutants and Masterminds who fucked up everyONE. Didn't matter if it was an enemy or a friend, eventually he punched everyone.

He punched not!Godzilla so hard that her offspring felt it.
He grappled his not!Emperor(Star Wars) teammate and threw him so hard at the battlesuit they both took damage from it.
And in the end he used a motherfucker as an improvised weapon even after he passed out, almost killing the guy. (I am pretty sure that dude never walked again, at the very least)

Like incompetent Worf?

But Jon is Aragorn, not Aegon. For fuck's sake, he's even a ranger.

>the ironborn are orcs
>who is Euron
>who is Victarion
>who is Aeron Damphair
>who is Rodrik Harlaw
cmon user, they might be mostly shitters but they aren't entirely irredeemable

>using unconscious cunts as improvised weapons
Brother?

ok, rodrik and aeron aren't orcy, but victarion and euron are for surten.

Put 'em here brother!

Doesn't Victarion spend his entire narration being angry and violent towards things he's too stupid and/or dogmatic to understand? He's textbook orc.

Even Aeron has a bit of Eye of Gruumsh in him

...

Victarion is like super orc. Euron is not an orc, though, yes. He is Sauron.

Geoffrey is way more hateable than Theon. Even at the worst point Theon isn't as gut-wrenchingly hateable as Geoffrey.

More like Saruman.

You were supposed to hate him?

this implies there's a competent worf

I find it hard to hate Joffrey because all he ever does is to impress -and later live up to the memory of- his "father". He's a complete shit because Cersei and Robert made him one.

Fuck me, this site gets dumber every year and the troltastic strung along straw graspings of ways that GoT is supposedly stealing tolkenish stuff gets dumber every week.

I remember there was a scene in the first season, right after he gets schooled by Arya's dire wolf. Cersei is fusing over his arm and he has a brief moment where he, in his own messed up way, sort of realizes that he did something wrong. It's wrapped up in his obsession with being strong like Robert, but it's there. And then Cersei just sweeps it all away and tells him that the truth is whatever he wants it to be, so he can just claim that he was strong and that's that.

Theon is easily my favourite Game of Thrones character, precisely because he is not perfect. He makes mistakes, big mistakes and regrets it. He easily has the most depth out of them all, especially compared to anime-style Mary Sue "protagonists" like Daenerys and Jon Snow.

Jaime is my favourite PoV character for many of the same reasons. Too bad the TV show fucked up his character.

showfag here. how so?

Jaime in the books is a very conflicted character, who begins as Cersei's lapdog and a very dishonorable man, but after he meets Brienne, she reminds him of an idealistic man he used to be.
He gradually distances himself from Cersei as her madness grows, and while his lost hand means he will never be a warrior again, he finds there are other purposes in life - justice, peacemaking. He fantasizes about shedding his Kingslayer identity and becoming Goldenhand the Just.

His relationship with Cersei is portayed as twisted and abusive. She manipulates and uses him, and while he loves her, she is only capable of loving herself. This is why she ditches him when he loses his hand and grows a beard - he is no longer her reflection in the mirror, both on the outside and the inside.

His arc ends with hum refysing to help Cersei in the Sparrow business, leaving her to her fate. Instead he chooses to save Sansa.

>idealistic man he used to be.
he never was. That was the entire point. Even characters like Arthur Dayne, Barristan the bold and others who are held up as the pinnacle of knighthood stood outside night after night as Aerys raped his wife. They stood aside when he burned people alive. Jaime was basically told that his duty is to guard the king no matter what.

Isn't the show beginning to go down that road with (spoiler for last episode)

near the end of the final episode, where he refuses her order to betray Danaerys/Stark alliance.

That being said, I did read about the Dorne plot, and the way the show butchered it had me pretty pissed when I found out.

The culmination of his arc is when Cersei sends him to take Riverlands, but he gave an oath to never fight against Starks and Tulies again. After making peace with minor lords, he takes the castle without a single drop of blood split.

Instead of taking the character down his amazing story path from the books where he discovers the man he could be without Cersei they just decide to do whatever with him from the fourth season and onwards, constantly backpeddaling on his character-development from earlier seasons because they can't have him breaking away from Cersei "too early".
Hell, even when they gave him a near perfect set-up at the end of season six (in the form of Cersei going full Aerys) to put Jaime back on his trajectory away from Cersei they just flat out ignore it for an entire season.

Idealistic is not ideal. It is the opposite of cynical

>he never was.
Yeah he was, before joining the Kingsguard.

He should have ditched her the moment she blew up Vatican. Instead, he shrugs it off.

I know who you are. Why don't you say something to me instead of acting like a passive aggressive bitch?

How is Bronn in the books by the way?

he stopped being idealistic the day he was inducted into the kingsguard.

He is left behind by tyrion
He marries lollys and takes over her castle, and spites cersei by naming her bastard tyrion

Hardly present after Tyrion leaves, but he has a great subplot in the background where he marries a retarded noble chick, provokes Cersei by naming the retard's bastard rape-child "Tyrion", then becomes Lord of the household by killing off the family in duels and such.

Jaime's vision was kino.

"We all dream of things we cannot have. Tywin dreamed that his soon would be a great knight, that his daughter would be a queen. He dreamed they would be so strong and brave and beautiful that no one would ever laugh at them.

"I am a knight," he told her, "and Cersei is a queen."

A tear rolled down her cheek. THe woman raised her hood again and turned her back on him. Jame called after her, but already she was moving away, her skirt whispering lullabies as it burshed across the floor. Don't leave me, he wanted to call, but of course she'd left them long ago.

He woke in the darkness, shivering.

I would cry too, if my children turned out like that

Not too dissimilar personality wise

He never has much interaction with jamie though. Ilyn payne (the mute royal executioner) is jamie's post disarmment sidekick in the books.

Bronn got his knighthood after blackwater and marries a rich retarded (literally) pregnant chick during tyrions trial.

Then he names the bastard child of his wife tyrion to fuck with everyone and when cersei sets bronns brand new inlaws on him in retaliation, bronn kills one and takes over the whole household becoming the lord of a rather old and prestigious noble house like he always wanted.

Tl.dr. he hasn't had a major part since tyrions exile but so far it seems like a happy ending for

The show ruined his character? Bullshit. More like rescued it from the ineptitude of the Mountain that Does Not Write.

Actually Jaime's character by the end of ADWD is pretty firmly in the redeemed hero side.

>The Mountain that Does Not Write.
I don't agree with you but I think this is great.

That was specifically the moment where his idealism started to falter, though. Before that he was almost a boy version of Sansa in how much he idealized the Kingsguard. And in fairness, they did also do other and better things, like taking out the Kingswood Brotherhood.

The last scene we had of him was the only redeemable part of this shit season

How does that even work?

For me it was the opposite, I really wanted Theon to overcome his condition by himself, and not because Jon gives him that Naruto speech.

Oh don't get me wrong, that scene was dogshit
I meant the scene at the beach. That was actually great. What lead up to it sucked.

Theon Did Nothing Wrong.

he didn't give his uncle a kiss even if he isn't the anime villain he is in the books I still think show!euron was one of the few redeemable qualities of this season, he's like if victarion had any charisma or self awareness whatsoever

Yeah, Show Euron is great. Better than book Euron, even. I really like how he's more Jack Sparrow than he is Blackbeard.

book euron is anime character.

Why not passion fingers because he fucks everything he touches?

>I meant the scene at the beach. That was actually great.
Seriously? He gets kneed in the groin three fucking times, but Captain Dickless is immune to such attacks now! Look how being tortured for three years straight has finally payed off!
I don't think D&D could've written that scene worse if they tried.

>tfw true understanders were too late to save stannis

Show Euron was one of the better things about this season, but that hardly makes him good.

Weirdly, book Euron is way cooler.

Like, he actually breaks out a suit of Sauron-armor, which is enough to make anyone go "Ohhhhhh fuck, that's a bad sign."

Show Euron is also an anime character.

*teleports fleet behind you*
*burns your sails*

"Time to MURDER my niece and nephew, kid!"

Littlefinger has been teleporting around since season 1, about time he shared his teleportation technology with the rest of the world.

thats just Dabid in action. He doesn't have a 2deep4u plan or anything. He just wants to be pirate king and put his finger in cersei's bum

>kill off your useless old brother after he attacked you on a midnight mid-storm stroll
>be democratically elected as ruler of the Iron Islands in the most ancient and holy of ironborn traditions, on the bones of Nagga's Hill
>hunt down your niece and nephew, both usurpers, traitors to the crown and traitors to the seastone chair
>destroy a fleet of traitors
>bring a group of child murderers who sent Dorne into chaos to justice
>end up hiring the most reputable mercenary company in all of Planetos, and winning the queen's hand in marriage
remind me why he's supposed to be the bad guy again

Because Asha (sorry, Yara) is a strong empowered womyn who should be king of the vikings etcetera etcetera

ironborn don't even have much in common with vikings besides superficial similarities, they always seemed more like 16th century irish pirates and border reivers to me

>kinslayer
>killed priest of the drowned god.

Balon drew his blade first, and he never laid so much as a finger on Aeron in the show but, considering the TWOW chapters, he's probably had a few inside him

>naruto speech

I lost it there.

youtubedoubler.com/lRKV

THEUN! YA NEVER LOST IM. IDS NOT ME PLACE TA FERGIV YER FALLUVID. YER A GREYJOI... ANNA STAHK.

>Have you ever made a character who just fucked up everything?
Is there any other kind?

Naruto, from the anime and manga Naruto, frequently influences his friends and enemies with the same kind of ridiculous motivational speeches that Jon gives here. Mostly it is just spouting extremely trivial stuff that is presented as some kind of revelation.

Can't wait for that dual Faction Stark/Greyjoy "Punished Theon" card

>Starts a continent wide civil war

The war was going to happen regardless even old king Robert knew it was coming.

Theon just fucked any chance of the Starrks coming out of it even relatively intact

Why would I play myself?

CAREFUL /tv/
CAREFUL

>Being this insecure

Yeah yeah I crossed my wires a bit fuck off, my real shame is not realising user posted a boar and wasn't referring to Theon.

Theon is the worst. His hero moment was literally that he doesn't have a dick and is immune to nut shots

Which doesn't even make any sense to begin with. Nut shots should at best hurt him just as bad as anyone else, and at worst fuck him up even more.

Especially considering how large the guy he was fighting was.

He lost his dick and his balls right? If it healed mostly it probably wouldn't hurt as bad.

>setting's existing faux-Elric of Melnibone and faux-Conan in the history

Who are they supposed to be in the setting now?

A character doesn't necessarily need to have a heroic moment in order to be interesting. Theon has problems, and screw ups, and inner conflicts. He wants to do the right thing, but can't bring himself to do it, or it somehow isn't possible.

This is infinitely more interesting than someone like Daenerys. When Daenerys wants to do something, or is in a difficult situation, it always gets solved through "lol magic", she doesn't really overcome any challenges, neither external nor internal.

Same goes for Jon, who was oh so principled The Watch is life, and then uses a magic loophole to quit it, no fucks given about duty, and oaths and whatever.

They are more like sea Spartans.

It's not that it doesn't make sense. It's just the lamest shit ever. It wasn't that he finally ditched the last of reek, it was literally "I HAVE NO DICK"

Daenerys is the most infuriating character in the show. It's bad already in the book, but both her and Geoffrey seem so much worse in the show.

Geoffrey is sickeningly tryhard, and he comes from being mildly disgusted by what he does to having a boner for pain. By the beginning of season 2 he's already the cruelest shitter in the realm.

However, Daenerys has a rather bad start, then get everything handed to her even if she can't take a right decision ever. After Qarth, she doesn't even have to deal with the consequences of her stupid actions much. It's awful. It's even worse that she is basically on her own arc rather than in westeros, and thus can't interact with anybody for the majority of the show.