Campaign setting has Roman-style toilets

>That party meets at a tavern's communal outhouse

I'd play it. Fresh new spin.
Imagine trying to introduce your cool new character while they're taking a shit.

>Step into the toilet house
>A dark and mysterious stranger is sitting in a shadowy corner

Private toilets also came out of concern for health. There was a whole hygienist thing about odor in the 18th were they wanted the highest roof in every building, the widest streets, to drain every flipping swamp, etc. that led sanatoriums to be build in mountains because the sea was full of dead things. It led to the high classes separating every source of odor : getting the kitchens away from the living rooms, having individual beds and bedrooms, preferably at higher floors, separating bathroom and toilets, then having private toilets. Also because the public ones were a thing of the common, whose ways were believed to be the bringers of diseases, stink obliged.
>And miasms. Fuck them.

Also, it probably began with an influencing faggot prefering some flower to the manly musc, leading to the realization that everything around him stank.

To the one defecating here. Beware of the curse. If you look down on this curse, may you have an angry Jupiter for an enemy.

>What is wrong with them?
>them

It's the water, OP. It could be full of baby Ixitxachitls.

I'm more interest by the result.
>PC 1 shits behind a house and is beaten to death by the guards as a result.
>PC 2 holds himself too much and gets a nice bladder stone.
>PC 3 can't stop ranting about the disgrace that are the local toilets and is seen as a madman by every NPC.
>PC 4 leaves the city for the woods and is never seen again.

Lovers are like bees in that they live a honeyed life

...

>implying Rome was actually sanitary
Reminder that the romans thought soap was bad and barbaric and prefered to use scrapers for sweat. They were grosser than the barbarians they conquered.

in a fantasy game setting, most sanitary issues can be fixed with some cheap purification runes or something. Maybe make all apprentice wizards or clerics work the shitters for a year where they can learn all about sanitation and the best gossip.

tfw the best place to learn about the newest magical research is in the cities Magic Quarter's public toilets.

>tfw Romaboos imagine living in an Insula is like a modern condo
>they don't realize it's more like living in the slummiest fucking building in Mumbai with a landlord whose idea of fun is throwing coins at you because inflation means the old fines are now pocket change, slaves ensuring you're unemployed, and a predatory fire service that will leave the place to burn down unless they can buy the building cheap first

"Shinji, get me some toilet paper and get in the mech. In that order."

Admit it! This sounds pleasant.

In a high magic setting or one that accounts for magic well (ironically, discworld is a good example here), I could totally buy this - there's a lot of low-end employment for undergrad and apprentice wizards in providing municipal services; they may work on the cutting edge of magic in their studies, but to actually fund tuition there's a lot of cantrip-level work - it's not unusual to find a couple of bored students chatting about the latest curse developments as they top up the alarm sigils on fancy houses or re-cast clensing spells

>The dungeon is underneath the toilets

Of course, that raises the question about the lack of a population explotion or even a [magic] industrial revolution.

Yeah. It still doesn't make up for the literally constant noise of traffic day in, day out because the city is such a blight in the land that it needs an eternal line of carts to keep the population from starving. There's a reason Rome's million inhabitants peak lasted about a generation tops.

Besides that shit was for knights and patricians, not the plebe.

>low end employment for undergrad wizards
This assumes modern levels of education in a modern system of education.

Academically trained mages above level 1-2 would be one in a thousand at best.

>Campaign setting has Roman-style toilets

So is it impolite to rub one out while shitting in public?

No shit, high magic settings are usually full of odd assumptions.

I mean, if every big magical city is like rome at it's peak then population levels might be actually reflective of the powers available in the setting, you never know.

>rub one out while shitting
I seriously hope you guys don't do this.

What, it's the perfect time. The pants are already off and you have a choice of where to spooze, in toilet paper or in the toilet.

Well yeah.

You can have a high magic setting just fine without "everyone goes to magic undergrad" nonsense. It's absolutely possible for magic to be high while still rare and of limited access outside of narrow classes, assuming accessing it doesn't require something insane like the near-death-experience levels that some rl shamanistic initiations among the steppe peoples took.

They're horrendously unergonomic.
The correct shitting position is the full-footed squat.

>(Early) Romans
>Placed heavy emphasis on dignity, honor and sexual modesty
>They bathe and piss together
What the actual fuck, Romans? I'd be okay with public bathhouses making a comeback though. The luxurious ones with massage rooms, sports fields, drinks and snacks, the works. As long as you're allowed to wear swimwear it's all good.

Early Roman (unlike Germans or Arabs) didn't consider shitting and pissing sexual.

>I'd be okay with public bathhouses making a comeback though. The luxurious ones with massage rooms, sports fields, drinks and snacks, the works. As long as you're allowed to wear swimwear it's all good.
It's called "wellness" now, and bitches love it.

Man this is really quite cool
It's like a little club house

>discussing geopolitics in the bathroom

>Geopolitics and touchdowns
Roman bathrooms don't sound too bad after all...

While it doesn't look especially pleasant, the sponge on a stick in public view of everyone should at least mean you've not got people just leaving things a mess as much

>literal shitwizards
Delightful

A little poopsterbation never hurt anyone.

How long are Romans taking to shit? Honestly it shouldn't take more than a minute or two unless you're feeling unwell.

Also what are they wiping with? Do they use those sponges or do they walk around all day with poopy buttholes?

I assume back when this stuff was communal it could also be used as an excuse to discuss things. They could make a trip out of going to the communal latrine together and whatnot.

They coated themselves in oil and scrapped it off to clean themselves.
They didn't have soap and public baths were for all intents and purposes spas.

They weren't exactly eating healthy back then.

>tfw it takes me 15-30 minutes per sit
>friends tell me to get a squat stool
>Now it takes 14-29 minutes per sit

You can damage your intestines by taking too long. Drink laxatives.

Nerds don't do sports or go to gym and aren't used to seeing a lot of naked men, I guess.

Roman-style shitter is still better than one of those rural style wooden booths that stink and are inevitably full of spiders.

>en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thermae_Romae
Just found it on manga reader, it looks like maximum cozy

>mfw the romans invented The Game and we've been playing it for two thousand years plus

THIGG

>15-30 minutes
You mean seconds?

what benefit is there to communal bathing exactly?

also most people live in countries full of niggers and sandniggers, unlike japan, so communal baths would turn into rape dungeons and/or gay fuck pits. also homeless would be a problem

these are the reasons you tend not to find bathrooms in metro stations in the us much less bath houses

I wish.
My digestive system is kind of fucked up. I only can go once every two days and it's a massive load that every toilet struggles with and most fail at. Then there's the occasional times I end up shitting a big glob of clear mucus too. A doctor put me on some pills that had me shitting stomach acid 6 times a day before I ditched them. I'm pretty sure I'll die on the toilet one day.

what if its a game with low magic, where you can't just fix problems for free by saying "magic fixes it"

because in real life, what was regarded as magic is really just science, chemistry and astronomy. Magic is just knowledge, and controlling mystickal forces which voilate conservation of energy is a bit silly

I shit quite easily but unfortunately I only shit every 4-6 days.

Then you call the night soil collector and pay a visit to the lant factory.

>Reminder that the romans thought soap was bad and barbaric and prefered to use scrapers for sweat
That's a legitimate method of cleaning yourself though. It's still getting rid of the bacteria and dirt from the skin.

>playing in a Hellenian style setting, introducing characters
>"So, why're you adventuring, Tirophius?
>"A priest of Apollo told me I had a great destiny, and that I ought to seek the Oracle. I'm on my way there now."
>"How about you, Aelias?"
>"I got cursed by Zeus, I'm going to try and do some heroic deeds in his name to get in his favor again."
>"A curse from the gods? What did you do to incur such a terrible thing?"
>"I looked at some graffiti while I was taking a dump."

>A little poopsterbation never hurt anyone
But the hemorrhoids you'll get from sitting on the shitter for so long will.

>I still don't understand why people are afraid of communal bathing

"They will see how tiny is my weenie!"

That's just a myth

Romans thought big dicks are a barbarian trait.

>that feel when the only job you can get is shitmage

It's been made into an anime. It's pretty funny, would recommend.

Lizard person spotted.

I actually remember I had an idea to use these in my current setting, not exactly sure how to bring them up since it's not like I keep track of the PCs taking a shit and they don't bring it up much either.

Closest I might imagine is when they're delving into the dungeon and see just how 'incredibly advanced even the water closets' of the dungeon are in relation to what they're used to.

Though I do imagine in the Terra Nova colonies they do bother with privacy screens and for public use require one brings their own 'sanitation wipes'.

You know, I was just thinking how amusing it would be if the PCs ran into the big bad while going to take a dump.

>PC needs to shit real bad
>Big Bad has had stomach problems for a week
>They both just glare at each other between dropping bombs

Shit, man, are you me? I mean my large intestine is shaped weird so I tend to need 14-20 minutes usually.

>player backstory nemesis

It sure as hell is a way to make sure your political rival won't try to jump on you and you both feel equal when talking.

Eat more vegetables, user

I don't I have ever shitted roleplaying... is this really a common thing to do?

Sleeping, eating and drinking, ok, but using the toilet? Na-ah