Meanwhile on Demon Hunter Veeky Forums

>Meanwhile on Demon Hunter Veeky Forums
Alright Hunters, what the fuck did you do? The Demon Realm collapsed, the giant cosmic horror's gone, everyone and everything is back on Earth (well, aside from all the stuff that got eaten by abominations), and everything *seems* normal. Except for the fact that the Earth's geography has majorly shifted, we've got giant, psychedelic floating islands just about everywhere, and the everything is just pulsing with raw Magic. So again I'll ask: What.Did.You.Do.

...

Someone's gotta fill me in too. I felt like I tried to fist the sun, succeeded, and the sun fisted me back.

We are utterly confused at these current events. We feel like utter shit, to put it simply. What exactly did you *do* Dear Hunters?

...

Brighton, UK, replying.
We managed to get out to key points on the city boundary and paint new wardings to replace those that had vanished.
The last one we did was where a major ley line crosses into the city.
We're still not sure if it was Fr. Murphy's holy water and blessing that cleansed it, or the ritual Haka by our resident Maori shaman scaring of whatever was at the root of it all, but once that ward was active, things returned to normal (or as normal as things get around here!)

At least you guys seem fine for the most part. We can already confirm that the normals are already flipping out and screaming at the fact that all this stuff has gone down.

they jury rigged a lux cannon
good news with the about half of the hierarchy dead I've moved up a lot of levels in the food chain

>they jury rigged a lux cannon
Wait, what. How are any of us even still alive?

>good news with the about half of the hierarchy dead I've moved up a lot of levels in the food chain
That giant........*thing* was your "Boss" we take it?

no
but a lot of died in the collateral damage

From what we've heard, the entire Demon Realm collapsed in on itself. So where exactly are you posting from, Belial?

none of your business but
cape matapan

so this is what happens when you burn demonic marijuana in the creation god's holy forge.


neat.

>so this is what happens when you burn demonic marijuana in the creation god's holy forge.
............Please do not do this.

...

How is demonic marijuana different from necromantic marijuana? Did I have anything to do with this? It would explain it feels like I'm burning even in body parts I don't have anymore.

please do this

Shut up, Belial. Unless you want us to track you down, and finish the job that we had started.

...

...

...

listen if anyone's dumb enough to actually take my advice they deserve the consequence and you know it

Of course anyone dumb enough or "brave" enough to take advice from you deserves what they get. You are well-known for lying and tricking people, after all.

...

Well, it wasn't JUST a lux cannon. See, we used these schematics and a jar containing some ancient horror to kill the eye. I lost my left leg (mostly), but the others were ok. I honestly think we did good.

This seems like Mage Guild 2.0 to me. Didn't yiu fags get the hint when you were kicked out to /qst/?

And did you not take into account that the raw magical backlash could have ended up destroying us all had you fucked things up?

>whining demon noises

I think we all did different shit that added together into one giant clusterfuck, cuz when I busted out of that hellscape I wasn't hearing shit about a lux cannon.

Not a demon. Just very concerned about the stability of the universe at the moment. We *really* don't want existence to start unraveling at the seams here.

...

...

besides Im sure you'd rather have me shitposting then a archdevil more motivated to do evil

Yes, I believe we took that into account. But we saw it as a last resort. That thing would have devoured the whole planet. Or worse, assimilated us all.

Russia, deep in Ural Mountains here.
We more or less fine. At least, undead Reds and Whites stopped fighting and using artillery, so that's a plus.
On other hand, we still got way too many werewolves and werebears, and now their population cannot be controlled by luring them into ancient battles sites.

We are low on supplies of holy water and good quality vodka - whatever that was thing assaulting us, it craved an alcohol, so we poisoned his "drink". Please send us some, so we can forget those things from Realm.

Cleveland reporting in
LeBron's basketball challenge to the demons worked and him unleashing the chaos dunk destroyed the local demons.
Downsides are the stadium is a massive smoking crater and no one's seen LeBron we think he might have ascended

>undead reds and whites fighting
Who won?

From what I heard, these idiots
>jury rigged a lux cannon
>shoved a magic nuke in it
>duct taped a mysterious jar to said magic nuke
>whatever was in the mystery jar 'reset reality' or something

Also, WHERE ARE MY GERMANIC FORESTS?!

As for the rampant magic energy, it's probably the King in Yellow's fault. Damn Hastur, messing around with reality AND creation

As for the major change in geography... how to put this in the least alarming way for you mortals.

You know the Great Old One sleeping in the city of R'leyh? Well, he's awake now.

Have fun with that.

Oh, posting from outside Seattle if anyone's wondering. The western coast of North America is still in the same place it was before, oddly enough.

Germanic forests are currently in the Peloponnesian peninsula no idea why or how

Okay, all this weird geography shit and stuff aside, I have one burning question:

WHO THE HELL STOLE THE NECRONOMICON?!

R'lyeh? What's that, some weird town in Japan?

>some weird town in Japan?
Well, there IS a massive, bizarre-looking island... city... thing just outside the mouth of Tokyo Bay now, so... yes?

On a side note, the Senkaku and Ryuku Islands are now a lot closer to Okinawa than before. Not sure if the home islands moved closer to them or the other way around.

Not sure if I like all the floating islands and raw Magic. The yokai here get rowdy enough as it is.

Austria reporting in
Charlemagne and Frederick just rode out of Untersberg with all their knights

Thank you for letting me know, miss. By the way, you're very, uh, 'well-equipped' for this line of work.

One more thing: You haven't seen any of these guys popping up around Japan have you?

What the fuck happened yesterday?
I had a tech blackout in my alt dimension thing and one of the local logic "monsters" (need one of you bestiary nerds to name them btw) tried to attack me, next thing I know is that I got in normal Earth's Tibet and Chinese soldiers weren't nice.

So anyway as I'm now back into business is mofos binded knights' hunter still here? I'm still interested in trying to replicate some of them;
if your ancestor's notes are gone I'll just magically auscultate one of yours so it has no chance to randomly break w/e is in there.

>You know the Great Old One sleeping in the city of R'leyh? Well, he's awake now.
We find it *extremely* convenient how he decided to reawaken *only* after the destruction of the Demon Realm and the local Greater Demon. Truly proves what a pathetic coward the Big C actually is. Either way, we shall make preparations to restrain him and his Spawn.

We've got a situation in Istan-Constantinople the marble emperor's returned with an army he's made it impossible to think or type Istan- and he's turning everyone who resists or doesn't fit his vision of Constantinople to sto

>he's turning everyone who resists or doesn't fit his vision of Constantinople to sto
>Gets cut-off partway through warning us.
Well shit. Any Hunters in that area capable of giving us a rundown on the situation there?

Just wanted to say that I wish you all the best and sorry in advance for you getting booted to /qst/, aka New Teegee.

When you arrive, please try to bump a few neighbor threads, as the population is currently lower than the old country.

You're much too kind!

As for those things... maybe? The country's dealing with a massive yurei problem at the moment, so they might be slipping under the radar.

Pardon my ignorance on the Western supernatural, but who is this 'marble emperor'?

Huh. The Greek pantheon is probably freaking out right now. Could be worse I guess. Could be Antarctica.

More importantly, I just came back from a stroll through the Path of Black Leaves and paying a quick visit to Africa. Here's a few changes from to that particular area of the world:
>The entire continent has swung outward using the Strait of Gibraltar as a hinge, doubling the size of the Mediterranean Sea.
>The Suez canal? Try Strait of Suez
>The Sahara is green and covered in savannas. Again.
>You humans can take the African Bush Elephant off that endangered species list you mortals have. Resetting reality apparently restored their population to Paleolithic Age levels.
>There are a LOT of floating islands in the sky above the Sahara/North half of Africa.
>Also, the vast majority of the floating island are not stationary/moored to one geographic point. Any of you demon hunters bother to watch a scientific documentary on how planets form when you're not doing your usual hunting shtick? Its kind of like that.

On a related note, I didn't see any of the Egyptian pantheon around, but they're probably still alive Unfortunately. That pantheon can make the idiocy that comes out of Mount Olympus look like something from 'Keeping up with the Kardashians'.

>On a related note, I didn't see any of the Egyptian pantheon around, but they're probably still alive Unfortunately. That pantheon can make the idiocy that comes out of Mount Olympus look like something from 'Keeping up with the Kardashians'.
Weren't you an Egyptian Death God once, O' Black King? What happened to sour you on them so? Also, what have the gang of cosmic terrors contained in spoiler related been doing as of late?

I'm on one of the floating islands, anybody know of a good way to get..down?

I'm with the lady in the sundress and the other guy: who's this Marble Emperor asshole? Sounds like a wannabe Medusa or something.

Charlemagne? Frederick? Knights?
Marble Emperors?
THE SAHARA'S GREEN?

THE HELL IS GOING ON?!

After a brief jaunt to the den of scum and villainy that is the normie's excuse for a "Wiki".
>Constantine XI Dragases Palaiologos, Latinized as Palaeologus (Greek: Κωνσταντῖνος ΙΑ' Δραγάσης Παλαιολόγος, Kōnstantinos XI Dragasēs Palaiologos, Serbian: Кoнcтaнтин XI Дpaгaш Пaлeoлoг, Konstantin XI Dragaš Paleolog; 8 February 1405 – 29 May 1453) was the last reigning Byzantine Emperor, reigning as a member of the Palaiologos dynasty from 1449 to his death in battle at the fall of Constantinople. Following his death, he became a legendary figure in Greek folklore as the "Marble Emperor" who would awaken and recover the Empire and Constantinople from the Ottomans. His death marked the end of the Roman Empire, which had continued in the East for 977 years after the fall of the Western Roman Empire.

Hey Ash, look up.

Uh, sure. I'll take a look outside my trail-

THERE ARE ISLANDS IN THE SKY!! WHY ARE THERE FUCKING ISLANDS ALL OVER THE FUCKING SKY!?!

I DON'T KNOW! MAYBE SO WE CAN BUILD CASTLES IN THEM? JUST GET ME DOWN I'M GETTING AIRSICK!

..oh shit, HIT THE DIRT!

your not wrong
glad I switched teams

You two weren't there when Earth out sucked into a Demon Realm, and we were all nearly devoured by a Greater Demon, we take it?

Hellohellohellohellohavehellohelloyouhellohelloseenhellohellothehellohelloyellowhellohellohellosignhellohellohellohellohellohello-FINALLY!! I GOT SOME RECEPTION UP HERE ON THIS ME-FORSAKEN MOUNTAIN!!!

Hello Demon Hunters! Nice to see most of you survived the 'Reality Reboot' I may or may not have set off in order to stop Paolo and Crutch's ancient horror/lux cannon shitshow from causing a cascading failure in the other dimensions while returning to normal after getting merged with the Demon Realm.

As you can see, there was a few... glitches in the rebooting process, so I had to get a little creative with the

My half-brother's awake? I know I 'borrowed' Thor's hammer and Vulcan's tools while I was 'working' at the forge of Creation, but I work wasn't THAT loud. Cthully sleeps like the dead after all! He's never been woken up by one of my eldritch technomagicking sessions.

Also, HEY GORR'LY!! HOW'S LIFE!

Have you tried jumping yet? That's a surefire way to go down. Unless there's a pocket of gravity reversal nearby. Then you'll go up! Haha!

>rubs chin in thought
You're big for a human female. I can't think of why though...

You guys have ruined these threads with all the crazy world spanning events and other dimensional beings posting breaking immersion and the interesting aspects of demon hunters being taken away.
And no, I don't hate fun, only your fun and I'm mad it's not my fun anymore.

put the tools back

haard to type fingers so stifffffffff
hee's going to restore hisss empire aaand I dont know how to stop h

Get off the Internet, Hastur. You're drunk. Again. For like, the nonillionth time.

You should probably prepare for a lot more traffic, and work, from now on. There are lot more cults out there now and many people made contracts with demons in order to survive.
I now have a giant crystal pillar in my backyard and no shit just stopped the third summoning ritual.

Also, calling dibs on the liquid metal dragon.

Guess by now it's a "magic returned to modern world" thread. Still can be interesting, Kekkai Sensen pulls that off quite well.

Okay, England reporting in. Good news is most of the South East seems to be fine from what I've seen, but I've yet to venture up to London. The bad news is I'm missing most of my left arm. Can anyone let me know how to get ahold of some robotics?

What island in the... Oh.

Ah, the yellow king! So tell me, what exactly was the jar beast? Also, did our dimension nuke do anything to stop the beast? I tried to watch, but I wasn't about to get killed.

Wales reporting in Owain Glyndŵr has returned and is attempting to rally us to throw of the English yoke
he's being surprisingly successful and I don't know how to feel about it

I wondering why everything didn't end
thanks by the way with almost all the hierarchy dead I'm close to top dog right now. I believe I you you something but can't think of a proper gift

Germany here, currently chainsawing through all types of fairie tale critters. The hardcore version, not the Disney bullshit.
Heard there's some shit going on at the Devil's Table, but I can't get there as my car is one of those stupid flying islands. Will probably tame myself a flying critter once I'm done with the fey here.

By now you might as well roll with it. I'm pretty sure Scotland will make another move for independence now and London is to busy with the Essex situation to do anything about it.

you don't understand
I can't understand a word he says
he's so welsh even most of us welsh can't understand him anymore

Maybe he's just drunk? Wouldn't surprise me, there's not much else to do when you sit around for millenia.

You can't "throw of the English yoke", you don't even have your own currency. We've got more important things to worry about that you lot getting all jumped up because reality got reset.

Wait, what Essex situation?

I don't want to
he does
and he's hard to resist

>slightly nervous laughter
thank you mister... ?King? in Yellow. Why does he have a female appearance if he's called 'King'?

I think it'll dial back down to normal demon hunter stuff eventually. The other dimensional beings posting is kinda amusing, in it's own unique way.

From what I've heard, things are turned around. Some places the entire landside is upside down, some places gravity pulls you up, some structures and people are turned inside out.
Some people now have their faces in the crotch and genitals on the head, some switched sex and some are just right/left handed by now.
Turns out people are really bad at evaluating their own problems, so public services are at their limit right now,

Hey man, I was just enjoying my vacation in Jacksonville when suddenly I'm up to my eyeballs in deadites. I just figured it was another 'someone read the Necronomicon again' thing! I had no idea the whole planet was merged with the Demon Realm!!

I'd say the whole place has gone to Hell, but apparently it was already there before.

How can he be hard to resist, you can barely understand him

Yeah, to be quite honest this only sounds slightly worse that how Essex is normally. I'm not too worried, London guild should be able to handle it.

ITS FUCKING MAGIC OK
HIS WORDS MAKE ME WANT TO KILL THINGS

user, this is not the time to talk about your personal issues. If you can't wait for more spinegore demons to show up, head down to Egypt and help the pharaoh fight back ISIS.

>HIS WORDS MAKE ME WANT TO KILL THINGS
That sounds like a Demon to me. I'd say I'm on my way to come kill him, but I think my arm wound is reopening. Really should get this looked at.

There's a pretty decent doc down in Sheffield, maybe give him a visit. He can slap some new parts on you if you need it. They probably won't be human parts, but beggars can't be choosers.

Are they robotics, because I'll take robotics.

The only thing I would want from you would be a test dummy for my next idea for a weapon.

what kind of test dummy?

No, more things like a goat head for a food, or an harpy's arm. But you might get like and just get a woman's arm or one where the skin color is vastly different.
Abunance of fresh corpses right now.

Belial, your definition of 'almost all the hierarchy dead is rather loose.

More importantly, aren't you supposed to be tracking down and catching Leviathan? The Idiot in Yellow's reset broke the thing's containment dimension remember?

Getting it back is supposed to be your job, not talking shit with demon hunters, yokai and Great Old Geezers.

Big, strong, demonic, squishy. I'm thinking about taking the destruction arrow and making bombs with the same concept.

Yeah, I'm not going to do that. Think I'll head down to London, try and see if I can't cash in a couple of favours. Right after I find some more towels to tie onto my arm.

make me

Leviathan is taken care of. BBQ in Bremerhaven, btw.

would the dead body of Mephistopheles work?

>The Idiot in Yellow's reset broke the thing's containment dimension remember?
Doesn't Leviathan *rule* over a good portion of Demon-kind? Why do you have it incarcerated in a Containment realm if it's practically your Boss? Unless you guys fear that it will eat you as soon as your backs are turned.

Strictly speaking I was playing the role of Egyptian Death God before the Egyptian gods existed and made it a point to keep them at arm's length at all times. They've always been crazy.

As for that crazy bunch, I haven't a clue because of all the glitches in the King in Yellow's 'reboot'. I don't even know if half of them exist now.

Le Loyon's probably still around though. Hastur wouldn't want one of his toys getting erased from reality or anything.

I KNOW IT'S YOU HACHISHAKU. QUIT HIDING.

Yes, give the 'dead body' of a demon to be used as a test dummy. That will end well.

I'm going to go find a nice sturdy wall and bang my head against it for awhile until I stop feeling pain from the sheer stupidity of what I just read.

he's actually dead

If London's too messy, come down to Brighton.
The NewAgers aren't much cop at dealing with incursions, but the crystal healers and Reiki practicioners are first class at patching us up and the Wiccans might be able to pull a regeneration if amputation proves neccesary...

That's HACHISHAKUSAMA, you overgrown noppera-bo!

There's no exact word for it in any human tongue, so let's just go with a 'GREAT NOPE! ELDRITCH BEAST'. And your dimension nuke unmade half of it from this plane of existence.

I might. I might not. I might tinker around with them some more. And there's nothing a cripple like you can do to stop me hahahaha!!

So the marble emperor is attempting to, as the normals apparently like to say, 'remove kebab'?

Is he dead dead, or just mostly dead? INQUIRING MINDS DEMAND TO KNOW! Hahahaha!

Uh... That wasn't Leviathan. That was a HUGE Deep One. Hopefully it wasn't Mama Hydra, or else Dagon'll be PISSED.

dead dead

I only need one hand to whoop your punk ass