Thread for times your players made you go "WTF". I'll start.
>Running Lost Mines of Phandelver >First time DM >Two of my three players are completely new to D&D and the third mostly played 3.5, but between me and him we've managed to cover the basics >Actually spend an hour before the campaign proper starts to establish how their characters met and became a party >Fast forward a bit, they're in the goblin cave >Since they're one man short of the four party the campaign suggests, I try to help by making them roll Wisdom checks so I can give them hints >They feed the wolves in the cave's entrance no problem and gain access to the shaft to the boss room >Dragonborn Monk (the experienced player) decides he wants to climb first while the others wait (worth noting here, the other two members are a Human Paladin...and a Wood Elf Rogue). >The other two just stay below and watch him climb. >Monk easily passes the Athletics check to climb up the shaft and the Stealth check (which I ruled to be pretty low anyway) to sneak in the cave unseen) >Describe a "much bigger, much hairier creature than a goblin, cradling a huge rusty spiked mace,shouting angrily at an unseen subordinate" >Monk decides it's a good idea to come out and try to talk to him(!). >After Klarg charges him and narrowly misses him both times, Monk decides his best bet for survival is to jump back down the shaft he came(!!). >Feeling merciful, or at least like I didn't want the campaign to end stillborn, I decided that since his friends (who were still below due to not rolling high enough to decipher Klarg's shouts) are cushioning him, he (and they) only take 2d6 damage each >Klarg, being more reasonable despite boasting an INT of 8, takes his time to climb down, culminating him in him arriving down at half HP, courtesy of the Wood Elf Rogue's Sneak Attack shortbow (she made me proud by reasoning that, since he was climbing a narrow chimney, he would have a Disadvantage in dodging much of anything) (cont.)
>Running Tomb of Annihilation >Running Lost Mines of Phandelver >Running Curse of Strahd
Luis Rodriguez
>It takes some doing, but they dispatch both Klarg and the one goblin I ruled followed him down (his wolf couldn't climb the shaft, for obvious reasons). >Rest of party decides to take a short rest (involuntary at Rogue's case, since she's at 0 HP and they have no healing left), but not Monk, oh no >Despite having clearly seen and heard Klarg's Wolf furiously howling down the shaft earlier, and despite being at 6 hp, he decides to climb the shaft again... whereupon he fails the Stealth roll to not wake up the wolf lying in wait at the entrance. >One critical later, pieces of the Monk rain down, having broken the threshold for instant death due to fall damage And that's how I started and ended my first campaign.
Nolan Carter
So he rolls a new dude and walk out from behind the next corner.
Bentley Sanders
This, OP did you really think you had to end the campaign just because one PC died?
Aaron Wright
>attempting somewhat realistic campaign >lol Kay these guys died because they’re dumb >asked why were they so inept to begin with >no answer >DMPC showed up with “realistic” tactics >turns out he was just as unrealistic, insane and very DM feat dependent >nah it realistic >how does that work >it just does
Henry Thompson
I want to continue, but I'm pretty sure the players have a phobia of goblins now.
>Be me >Fairly new to D&D but becoming comfortable with the rules >Playing Rage of Demons >Party consist of Human Paladin(me), Gnome Bard, Insane Half Orc Barbarian and a few others I don't remember >Arrive at Sloop Da Loop or whatever (This was about a year ago so some details are foggy) >Have to stop ku toa ritual >Insane Barbarian discusses with his split personality which he personifies as his war-hammer that they should just jump into the fray and kill everyone >Try to stop him but it's futile >Forced to run in with him as I am the only one who can heal in the party >Barbarian gets the bright idea to throw live ku toa into the river so they drown >ku toa are dragged under the water by something we can't see, the party tells him to stop but he ignores them >The Demogorgon shows up and starts destroying the town >Barbarian decides to yell at it >Demogorgon yells back >Cue EVERYONE BUT ME AND THE GNOME failing the Wis save and starting to have seizures, hallucinations, or worse >Have to drag everyone onto a boat to escape >We ended the campaign because nobody wanted to play if we were all insane due to Barbarian's mistake
Robert Mitchell
Hey, your group sounds like it has only one person who makes really bad decisions.
Imagine a group where there are three players who make bad decisions and only one player who makes relatively good decisions!
Christopher Rogers
This monster's roar makes you permanently insane?
Andrew Brown
>have 5 players >they all make terrible decisions all the time >4 of them are so afraid of fucking up for the group that they rarely do anything >that one guy is always pitching his shitty ideas that fuck the group over anyway my group in a nutshell
Angel Edwards
>Be me I know this poster is probably dead by now, but who the fuck would you be? Fucking retard.
Angel Rivera
Not that user, but I specifically start every story I tell Veeky Forums with: >be me Just to trigger grumpy, dumpy little anons like you. I never did until autists kept whinging about it. So silly.
Charles Richardson
Oh, so it is ebin trolling now? I see.
Logan Howard
Looks like it's working, to me
David Perez
>*freeze frame* >*record scratch* >be me >now, you're probably wondering how I got this mad... >*entire thread rewinds*
Lucas Hernandez
Is this some Veeky Forums thing that I'm missing now? Wasn't like this years ago. Not even /v/ immediately claims the other side is butthurt over the slightest disagreement. At least wait for a few more replies before pulling that card, guys.
Levi Rodriguez
You aren't the boss of me, bro
Carter Torres
> player joins campaign of two players > yeah, we're that low on people to play with > played one campaign with us before, did fairly well before it got abandonned > "I want to be detective type of guy, with logical thinking and party face traits" > sure, you are now an actual detective > for some fucking retarded reason I decide, that he should come meet the party by himself, ask them a few questions about cases he's working on > he's probably going to calmly knock on the tavern room door, ask about involvement with local gangs, right? > "I bang on the door, shouting, 'In the name of the law, open the fucking door!'" > fuck, I should've known > mage levitates out of the window, runs back inside, blinds and paralyzes the detective > they tie him up, ask him what info guards have on them > "fuck off, you terrorist scum" > 10 minutes of semi-IC "we're not terrorists, though" – "lol you are terrorists" > detective lies about ambush around tavern, mage levitates out of the window with detective and tries to fly over a city wall > a random guard who happened to be near tavern shouts at mage > mage ignores him, gets crossbow bolt in the back. I roll d12 damage > fucking 12 > that means the mage will either drop detective or fall down with him, probably. No chances of survival > everyone agrees to retcon except detective who's feeling lolrandom
Luis Ramirez
> after retcon warrior goes hunting as he wanted to, everything is smooth, NPC hunter collects hides for him > he's been dreaming about full set of lion hide armor which gives +5 to panic resistance > never even had to roll for panic, says wants Hercules like style for STR+CHA character. Sounds cool > party gets back to city, want to find out about this strong guy that kicked their asses couple of days ago > he's supposed to be a member of generic crazy anarchists gang > they go to their territory, it's 8AM. They see one dude that obviously belongs to the gang. Mohawk, scars, wears a club. He's standing near his house waiting for his friends > pls don't fuck up > "IN THE NAME OF THE LAW!" > fuck > detective rushes into house showing his badge or whatever > the whole party doesn't have time to think, since AS SOON as I state something he responds and I get dragged into his tempo > NPCs mom is there, cooking breakfast > "uuuh... hey, NPC-name, is this your new friend?" > they have breakfast together > after they leave the house party just bribes the guy to tell them everything he knows about the NPC they're looking for > after the session everyone tells detective to slow down with decisions, give other party members time to think > his answer is something along the lines, "looks like you don't like my playstyle at all, so I don't want to play anymore"
Julian Walker
A friend of mine convinced me to post this.
>Have a PF campaign where we rotate DM every few adventures. >Until about a year ago when I got stuck as the DM. >The players are a ragtag bunch who all approach things very differently. >One of them play a human fighter/alchemist. He doesn't really engage much in alchemy except for throwing firebombs every now and then. >Let's call him Marcus. >Marcus likes to plan and use the tools that he have. >A notable example is when they saw someone use a secret door in a library and instead of searching for a hidden mechanism or mimic the persons actions he did something else. >You see bookshelves burn when they come into contact with fire. So since the hidden door was a bookshelf all they had to do was burn down that specific bookshelf. >So he threw a couple of firebombs at it and burned down the entire library.
>Another time he saw potential for business in the aftermath of a huge battle. So while the wounded and dying soldiers are calling out for help he built himself a stand to sell his healing potions for at least 100 gold each.
But the time I'm really supposed to tell you about was about 2 years into this campaign and was the end of his character.
(Continued 1/2)
Jaxson Brooks
>Over the course of the campaign Marcus character is the only character left of the original party. >Thanks to being adventurers they have gathered a large amount of loot. >Marcus decides to sell all the things he has collected over the years. >So during the late evening he decides to visit the goldsmith with his bag of goodies. >When he arrives there's a sign on the door that says "CLOSED - PLEASE COME BACK TOMORROW" >Worried that something might have happened he readies his grappling hook and throws it into a window on the second floor and climbs up. >A few people gather, curious to what's happening. >Marcus is now on the upper floor of the goldsmiths workshop. He can see a lot of jewelry and unfinished projects. So he shoves them into his bag in hopes of selling them later. >When Marcus finally decides to leave the workshop he notices that a bunch of people have gathered outside so he decides to exits through the backdoor instead. >Guards have been called and they are looking for him. Marcus sneaks around the town and manages to steal a coach. >He attempts to flee the city with the coach and runs over a couple of guards at the same time. >As he escapes the town walls the horses are shot down by the guards. >He is caught and the authorities does some investigation on him and realize what kind of person they have caught. >They hold a trial and all the other players witness against him and reveal other things that he has done. >He is sentenced to a life time in the salt mines.
