Dad, I think I'm a lesbian

Okay. I suppose it's a good time to let you know that the prince you're marrying next month buggers his squire and cares not for women.

Shut the fuck up.

"Cool, you'll fit in great at the nunnery. I'm pretty sure I heard your sister call prince Waldorf dashing anyway."

"I don't give a fuck what you call yourself, you're having a son."

"That's great, the Prince I'm marrying you to is gay anyway."

This is how it worked, too. Romantic love wasn't really a consideration in political marriages. They were used as bargaining chips and ensuring stronger ties between the two parties.

So, the princess can lick whatever she likes as long as she actually marries the prince and bears some successors.

Prince Waldorf the Dashing is called that because he runs away from any woman he's arranged to marry. He's deserted two princesses and four duke's daughters at the altar this year, and one of those marriages was in the Dread Fortress of Spite.

They say he's, you know, elf-blooded.

She might not enjoy fucking Waldorf, but she’ll still get pregnant so who cares?

Teach her how to manage a mistress.

>no bone rot!
Why this specifically?

>the heirs to the most powerful kingdoms of the continent are both queer as a five-legged dwarf
>in every other respect they are entirely competent royals and superlative administrators
>if you don't manage an alliance, the land will surely be plunged into war as the rivalries of minor families ignite

Because if you buy any other brand your bones will rot.

So what you're saying is that I either get a useful political alliance or an airtight excuse to invade one of my neighbors and people to help me do it?

"Who the fuck are you?"

Honey, we all do things for the kingdom we don't like

I'd like you to meet my "Special Friend" John and if that doesn't covince you, you should meet you mother's "Special Friend" Mary

He sells her to a prince and she will get over it.

Oh thank God no bone rot.
Sick of that.

Good parenting.

The only daughter I have is a bastard, so this is literally irrelevant to the kingdom and in fact an advantage.

The sum of all answers in the thread is:
You are marrying your suitor anyway. He might be gay, but he'll marry you too. You'll both maybe having lovers on the side, but that does not matter because if you have a child, the alliance is secure.

Which is the correct answer.

Congrat's Veeky Forums

>king has a harem
>so he has many children
>all raised by hand maidens and servent-girls
King does not even know his daughter’s name and does not give a shit about her

Actually the correct answer is "Hi Alesbian, I'm King Dad"

It's notr political enough for nu/tg/pol/ to be interested.

Now, if you had her say I'm going to turn the kingdom to communism you'd have much better bait.

>>Dad, I think I'm a lesbian

Either...
>>You're still getting married, you stupid cunt
Or...
>>Enjoy the nunnery, you stupid cunt

Princess' only value is as a brood mare. In almost every case, King Daddy has to pay someone - remember dowries? - to marry her.

So, she can either shit out heirs while "making merry" with her ladies of the bedchamber or she can she how many nuns are lesbians too.

>implying she’d have any power
If the king is giving her away as a bargaining chip to secure an alliance, she’s probably fourth or fifth in the line of succession

>Dad I'm a fucking radical lesbian communist and I'm going to kill you, marry a dragon AND a girl and share the royal treasuries with all the women in the kingdom and we'll all eat pussy all day forever.

So we will make a political marriage & you can have your pick of bedwarmer. This isn't an issue.

>"Okay. So you choose the nunnery then."

jesus fuck I wasn't ready for this

>The king sheds a single tear of pride, knowing that though she may be naive, at least his daughter realizes the importance of ambition and dragon fucking: the pillars upon which the kingdom was founded

>Princess' only value is as a brood mare
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Komnene

>first reply
>46 seconds apart
Every time.

Sorry, but no.

She was first engaged in an attempt to "import" a male heir in to the imperial family. The Emperor had no sons at the time and decided that he'd probably have to hand over the throne to a likely son-in-law. When the Emperor's son was born, Anna's engagement was broken when her fiance conveniently died.

She was next engaged and then married to the heir of a family who had contested the throne against the previous emperor. That marriage aligned a previously rebellious and dangerous family with the sitting emperor.

The fact that Anna wrote some chronicles and was assigned a few administrative posts doesn't mean shit. Her primary worth was her cunt and her meat hole first "bought" a potential heir and then "bought off" a family of potentially dangerous rebels.

Tells her to just keep a mistress or two on the side, but she still has an obligation to marry any eligible prince and sire offspring for political reasons.

Obviously

>Yes, as the seer predicted. That is why I raised you as a boy.

Genius.

>tfw your daughter has the same political platform as you

Here's how the king fucking reacted

>Legitimized a bastard child at the last minute to try and keep his Kingdom from being taken over by the damned French
>Had to [s]sacrifice[/s]assassinate younger "legitimate" male heirs because they're not dynastic heirs because that damn French whore and her tricky family politics before he took the throne
>Legitimized bastard heir is a 10 year old Assyrian girl because he couldn't keep it in his pants
>Pope calls Crusade for Finland; fucking FINLAND of all places
>Head off on Crusade with Satan-worshiping fuckbuddy
>Get message that heir is homosexual AND betrothed partner is an invalid
>Stabbed in the dick by some Estonian cockstabber
>Try to head home and start shouting at everyone
>Brewing conspiracy finally came to a head and end up killed in a manure explosion
>12 year old Assyrian lesbian bastard child is now Queen

CKII is way too useful in getting campaign ideas.

So I guess you could say he had a blast.

Also ctrl+s, dude.

...

carlos you shit
fuck, i thought i did, how did it end up like that?

Third post best post.

You get married, you close your eyes and thing of kingdom, you squat out a baby or two and have whatever lover you want

Tiresias really earned his paycheck with that one.

>Well that's good, because prince Waldorf is gay too!

Excellent my daughter, just as the Prophecy foretold! Now we shall bring the world to Revolution!

Let us crack the egg!

That is preposterous, darling. Lesbia is leagues upon leagues away. My Harem is surely vast and immense as befits my station as ruler over all I survey but I'm pretty sure I'd remember if your mother was half so exotic. Now hurry along, I know you have those singing lessons with Rashada this evening. Do try to keep down this time though. That Faggotorian throat wailing just isn't to my tastes.

Don't care. Munch rug on your own time. You got heirs to make.

In my setting? Most lands don't legally differentiate between adopted and biological children. Also, homosexuality is not a moral issue and never has been. So it goes something like this:

>"Dad, I'm a homosexual."
>>"Neat."

And that's it.

Also, this:

"Oh sh- SOMEONE CHECK ON THE FUCKING LICH RIGHT N-"
*cue skeletons*

>a huge chunk of popular literature at the time was all about love and marriage
>hurr durr love wasn't important

...

Forced marriage to some prince from a neighboring country for more power

>How does the king react?
Celebration
you're not a father of a daughter are you user?

Love wasn't a consideration in most marriages. Dowries. Dowries. Dowries. The second they're a part of the equation, love just fucks off to a few fringe cases. Not even peasants married for love. You live your whole life in a 5 mile bubble of reality centered on your farm, and you think you're going to actually meet love? Fuck no, here's hilda she's from the village over, you're both marrying age, now go make more people to farm (after this much less impressive dowry payment goes through).

You're an idiot.

not well but the princess escapes and later sacks the castle alongside her lover. tis pretty fucking rad.

this but unironically. that sounds like a fucking blast. I'm totally putting 2 communist queens in my next story one of which is a dragon, are you kidding me thats the coolest shit ever.?

I'm sure your future husband will find you some discreet maids.

I don't think that word existed at all until the 20th century. People didn't see homos as homos but as hetero perverts.

youtube.com/watch?v=OLpeX4RRo28

"When he inevitably gets a mistress, you can probably fuck her with him."

I bet this character exists in Exalted and has actually succeeded.

How can you be a communist when industry hasn't been invented yet? There's no proletariat to rise up against capitalists.

Love it.

19th century, actually. Because of Sappho, who lived on Lesbos, and wrote poetry and love letters to women.

>Sappho, who lived on Lesbos
She sounds gay.

At such a time or setting marriage is viewed more like a contract for selling away the daughter or to connect families together, not as a union of love between two people.

What she does with her handmaidens is of no importance. Lord knows her great grandfather enjoyed the company of his young squires, but was a good leader nonetheless.

She will still marry her distant cousin who is son of a baron, and she will still produce heirs for him.

>implying the sexuality of a princess matters
Marry her off, she'll have kids whether or not she's attracted to the guy fucking her.

>Romantic fiction is popular at one point during a massive era of history
>That must mean everyone was in disney movie love despite all of the historical evidence to the contrary as well as contemporary accounts from societies which still practise the dowry tradition.
Gee user, you sure are smurt. I wish you'd be my friend.

1870's.

Bisexual, actually, but yeah, she was pretty damn gay.

I thought the "bisexual Sappho" thing was stuff invented after her time because people couldn't handle her being gay.
Kinda like Napoleon being small, Hitler being wrong, stuff like that.

Belt of Gender Change.

Even if people married unwillingly, that doesn't mean they were fine with it.

Fpbp

Talk about self-fulfilling prophecies.

You're profoundly stupid.

The courtly love idea championed by Eleanor of Aquitaine via patronage of troubadours was all platonic love outside of marriage and physical love within it.

Just as with your mother and the customer who knocked her up, love was not involved in the marriages of the period.

Oh hey, there's a comic about basically that, minus the dragon. It's called Ladycastle.

>Dad I want to be a pozzer and fill a neghole
How does the king react?

>hitler being wrong
leave /pol/
also it wasnt until recently that lesbian meant strictly woman on woman. The term bisexual is far more recent and was used to replace the original term 'lesbian' as what it originally meant.

Remove c/u/cks. Lesbian PCs are the most cancerous thing ever.

>wanting royal bastards
>wanting a scandal

Honor killing or "you will marry this prince and if you embarrass him by fucking around you'll be shut in a tower, alone, forever except when he needs to force-feed your womb his seed" are the only actual options.

>b-but my affairs!

Actual royalty care about that shit. Sell an ally a whore and they'll remember it. It's not just about heirs, it's about alliances.

Enough fucking dykery already. Get the fuck out. No, this isn’t the king’s reaction.

Go back to /hm/ retard.

>"AISHA YOU WILL REPENT THIS SINFUL PATH OR YOU WILL BE KILLED FOR THE SAKE OF THE FAMILY'S HONOR! A DOZEN LASHINGS FOR YOU, AND ALL MAIDS IN YOUR SERVICE SHALL BE REPLACED BY EUNUCHS! INSHALLAH THIS WILL BE ENOUGH TO KEEP YOU IN LINE, YOU SLUT!"

Have fun with the country collapsing within a week and the PCs siding with the orcs to loot it.

...oh right, you don't have a game, that's why you said "story."

Acording to my actually gay High School Latin teacher, odds that she was into girls are very low. She wrote love poems about girls because she wanted men to read them, and if she wrote poetry about men it would be viewed as weird and uncomfortable. Not because it was about loving men (obviously) but because it implied a sexually aggressive woman.

Somebody's upset.

>Acording to my actually gay High School Latin teacher
You need to be 18 to post.

I actually had this happen in a game I was in once. It...ended badly. Really badly.