You're traveling

>You're traveling.
>Suddenly you meet a knight without limbs.
>He's asking if you could take him to the next village.

What's your answer?

Ni!

Sure, just grab on to my shoulders and I'll carry you.

Well... it is a long walk...

Sure thing, Bob.

First he must bring me... A shrubbery.

'tis but a flesh wound, brave knight, you can surely move by yourself.

"Your arms off!"

I laugh, I rifle through his pockets and take his coin purse.

"Tough luck, but immortality's a bitch, eh?"

Sure, no problem.

When I wrote "Good" on my character sheet, I meant it.

I offer him my ring of regenera... oh. nm...

>"Tough luck, but immortality's a bitch, eh?"
Yeah, in different circumstances I bet he'd be kicking himself right now :^)

I mean if he still has his dick, it may be possible with some effort

"Well you ain't got no legs Sir Dan."

Sure thing Stubby, just hop in the wagon.

Is the joke meant to be that he can't kick himself because he doesn't have legs? Because you can't really kick yourself with or without legs. Closest I can get is hitting my butt with my hell.

>KICK - To strike out with the foot or feet.

Do you really not get how legs and feet work?

you call flipping your heel back "striking out with the foot" ?

Yeah, okay man, whatever you think.

...

You can kick each leg with the other leg. You can very gently kick your own ass. If you're slightly flexible you can kick your arm, and if you're really flexible you can kick yourself in the head.

The point isn't about doing damage, 'kick yourself' is just a turn of phrase.

Regardless of how you think kicking works, someone without feet can't do it.

>You can kick each leg with the other leg
you got me there

>What's your answer?
You gonna get raped

>Cash, gas, or ass, no one rides for free

Sorry, sir, only got room for one.

>knock him over onto his face
>rape his sweet virgin ass
>cauterize his stumps so he won't bleed to death
>carry him around in my saddlebags as my personal pocket pussy for the rest of my days

Asanagi, please.

You have him hold it in his mouth and poke the tip of his tongue through the ring, then hold it there until it takes effect.

Who?