The noblewoman insists on having all of your party members and belongings searched

Welp, not much I can do about it, I agree to it as long as they don’t take my shit
Also this

No joke, I really do miss quest threads on Veeky Forums.

Grope me all you want, I'm gonna return the favor by fondling them dragon antlers

>her two big burly guards step forward and start man handling you

>touching a dragon's horns

there's a whole board for them now, senpai

Well I mean sure, if she wants to rummage around my box of dildos, go for it.

>"I feel a large blunt object in their pants madam"

>>the noblewoman insists on having all of your party members and belongings searched
What belongings?
We never had anything.
>>the noblewoman insists on having all of your party members and belongings searched
What party members?
We were never here.
>>the noblewoman insists on having all of your party members and belongings searched
What noblewoman? She was never here either.

>"Dear diary, today we successfully managed to steal the throne. You know, like the actual throne seat, together with the noblewoman sitting in it and all."

>Loli Dragon finds my evergrowing collection of Loli Dragon CP

We do what we must to grab life by the dragongril antlers
I'm gonna lick em too. I bet they taste like heaven.

>56902034
t. post election cancer
Neck yourself boy

>there's a whole board for them now, senpai
Yeah... too bad quests were only fun on Veeky Forums because they require a large amount of posters who understand the concept of a roleplaying game, and /qst/ doesn't have either of those things.

I still think we need a separate thread for Excuse Me threads. They're like 90% of the board at this point.

This whole board is an abortion considering how dead traditional games are.

>>Disintegrate
>>Gust of wind
>>Can we please move on from this silly sidequest?

I'm literally naked, one party member is a cardboard box, and the third involuntarily produces memes that give people cancer (he's in quanrtine inside boxman). You do NOT want to search us.

>"dragon"

This board is for lorefaggotry, tabletop, and worldbuilding, and you know it.

>my bi barb manhandles them back
>orgy ensues

>This board is for lorefaggotry, tabletop, and worldbuilding, and you know it.
Ironically, most of those things get moved to /qst/ these days.

I wish I had that screencap of the "Star Wras is not a traditional game" when the mod banned discussions of SW lore.

But yet towergirls is one.

People cried for removal of things from a niche board, let them enjoy it getting even more dead.

>But yet towergirls is one.

Yeah, I really don't get why CYOAs are still on Veeky Forums and stuff like Field Kit Inspection was forcibly moved to /qst/. I don't have anything against CYOAs being on Veeky Forums, but it doesn't seem to make sense that threads where people pretend to be random guardsmen shitposting on Imperiumchan is radically different from people pretending to be horny knights trying to pick up monstergirls.

I assume Veeky Forums's mod is a TowerGirls fan, which is why CYOAs get a pass.

That's literally the case. Shitpost in a towergirls thread and you get banned nearly instantly

Dumb paranoid anons

Man user, are you some kind of child molester or something?

CONTEXT?

That's fine, the only interesting thing my character is carrying is her magical shapeshifting sword. So long as they don't touch it and make it mad we're good.

You can't be a woman if you're a fat sweaty man

Going by OP's image, probably the last.

kill yourself pedshit

...

Who realistically wouldn't touch a shapeshifting sword?

Considering the power level of the party that noble had better be pretty high up in whatever circle she comes from, because if not she isn't getting anything.

Are you playing a Doom Patrol game or something?

I'm a merchant, all of my goods are on my Cargo manifest. Except my fancy walking stick of 'let me understand your language', I carry that around openly.

My party are all my caravan guards, eclectic though they are; expect to find weapons on them.

So, we get searched, get everything passed just like we did when going through the city guard, and we get on our way. (Or get on to selling stuff to the noble, if that's what I was there for.)

Me and my party agree that her motive is to get us killed in a sneak attack while "searching" us. Naturally, we kill everyone present and loot whatever we want and need.

That is maximum murderhobo but I can't help but respect it. Random murder without actual evidence of malevolent intention, though, none of you better be any shade of Good.

Look, user, if the players win the fight then that just proves that the noblewoman and her guards were no match UNLESS the party was off-guard and in the process of being searched. ERGO this is proof post facto of intent. Also attacking first is merely prudence, and what can be more virtuous than prudence?

Stands to reason it was the goodest act of all, which befits the season.

This is pretty fucking standard when dealing with strangers, let alone armed murder hobos. It never fails to crack me up how many players get offended by this sort of thing and try to lash out illogically. You're lucky they asked or even let you know they were going to search you. This isn't America. Laws against search and seizure don't exist.

great now i am going to have to explain the tattoo on my left buttcheck

Cyoas are the best thing about Veeky Forums

Well, if we’re in her house that’s technically her right. Just give ‘em back later.

So does the rest of Veeky Forums because every fucking day there’s a thread or nine that starts like this, even though this isn’t a question and isn’t about a game and is really just a declarative statement.
I’ve half a mind to fucking start a quest and just pretend it’s a Greentext thread and see if the mods are lazy enough and stupid enough to overlook it.

What a tremendous dog-fuckin faggot.
Mods should either do their job proper and without bias or avoid doing it at all, or perhaps just go get a late-life abortion done on themselves.

But star wars isn't a traditional game, you humongous faggot.
Crying because you can't discuss your shitty childrens movie and assorted extended universe multimedia whoring?
Fuck off.
Same goes for every other IP not originally Veeky Forums.
>haha I made this shitty homebrew for naruto that means 24/7 naruto generals are allowed on Veeky Forums now
that's literally your logic

Haha I wonder what the underside of her tail smells like just wondering haha

Wrongo, retardo. Learn hospitality customs.

I will only agree if the loli dragon agrees to have her orifices probed by my penis.

Except we were discussing the game itself. In the mean time, the thread about ORC BALLS ON MINIS stayed up.

>brace for uncovering scrolls of ifrit porn

Why would you carry that

Why would you carry that
So that the noble can find it.

Becuse it's hot.

I unsheathe my cock from my loin cloth and drop my axes on the ground. Considering that those are the only 2 items I actually have and carry with me surely this woman is coming on me.

Ma'am, this is far from necessary, seeing as I, the Emperor's Will made manifest, is standing before you, ceramite-clad, with his holy armaments chained to his wrists. However, if it abates your curiosity, you will be pleased to know that within my left most belt pouch, there is a half-eaten ration bar; war makes a man hunger, even one of His Majesty's own sons.

I haven't really followed the towergirls, but from what I've seen of it, it was a collaborative effort to create a game, which is distinct from what a quest is there was back and forth on what the designs and abilities of the characters were to be. I'm not sure the end product it remotely playable but it would seem to fit the purview of this board.

..."Tch. Fine. I don't like it, but I get that it's necessary. Let's make this quick so we can discuss the 'business' you called me out here for."

>Taking a man's candybars
I will kill everyone in the room.

Knew we shouldn't have bothered trying to act diplomatic with mutants.

Only half-eaten? This man knows how to ration out his meals. The guardsmen could learn a thing or two from this humbling son of the Emperor. Somebody give this man a hat!

Only if it's the good shit, like a Charleston Chew. You even think about taking that away and there will be a bloodbath.

This is outrageous, it's unfair.

I think a marines ration bar is big enough to feed two guardsman. They are big boys after all.

Umm...okay, but I take no responsibility for loss of sanity/limbs your staff incurs from searching through the dedicated bag of do not touch.

That's reasonable. We could be spies or assassins. We're not, but it's a good practice

Two copper coins says this guy can roll a Peacebloom one-handed

>Learn hospitality customs.
Fuck you, this is a noble. Hospitality Customs are for chumps who wanna get knifed

DO you know why warriors shake by grabbing each others wrist? So they can't pull away and draw a fucking sword. Do you know why table ware exists? So people wouldn't have an excuse to have knives on hand, just the blunt shit provided for eating with.

Also, kilts were first worn because they can conceal more weaponry.

>"at once my liege"
>Her men find a small pouch of iron filings
>several gucci as fug holy symbols
>a bed roll
>an xboxhueg solid gold holy symbol on a solid gold chain tiny humans struggle to lift
Feels good being a mammoth paladin mang.

That's bullshit, kilts were worn because a length of cloth that you wrap around yourself is the simplest possible article of clothing.

>bringing anything but the goodshit outside of halloween where you trade bad for good.

they can't DO THIS.

>finally get a chance to be filched by a hot noblewoman
>literally playing a naked hobo with a stick

Well thank god I put all my valuables up my slave's asshole

>the artificer beings unloading near endless amounts of cast iron safes from his patchy backpack, muttering about forgetting the codes to half of them. "Try not to break anything, okay?"

>She wants a thurough search rather than a basic surrendering of weapons at the door.

Hm, just a little bit paranoid? One way or another she probably knows something about the devil cultists running around. Based on our intel the odds are nine in ten she's afraid of them and possible assassination, but can't discount that she might not want to be unmasked. Enter the audience aware and on-guard.

>implying any party is stupid enough to carry anything dangerous/volatile into a noble's home

>So does the rest of Veeky Forums because every fucking day there’s a thread or nine that starts like this, even though this isn’t a question and isn’t about a game and is really just a declarative statement.
>I’ve half a mind to fucking start a quest and just pretend it’s a Greentext thread and see if the mods are lazy enough and stupid enough to overlook it.
Please do, that sounds like fun.

>The only thing I value is my penis

>I utilize my armor's quick removal function to strip myself before their eyes in seconds
>By doing so, I reveal my true strength and power
>An oiled body and a ye olde timey g-string
>worn backwards
>I begin rapidly rubbing my nipples and, as loudly as possible, moan out "Your move, Mr. Lawman!"
>No one in that Throne room will ever be the same
>Not even my god

go on

Anyone who's been informed that one of the forms it takes when upset is literally just spikes.

youtu.be/gAMPsIAuszA

And then you're executed for obscene actions.

i am a warlock it is the binding mark of my patron

>implying I have not already won

>Implying they can grab his well oiled holy physique
>Implying that attempting to do so won't simply make things worse
>Implying this is the first time he's done something like this

>"Searched? Our stuff?! My stuff?! What the hell does that bit-... damn noblewoman thinks? That we are thieves? Well I am not a thief (anymore...)"
>"And you better keep your hands off my gear, especially Betsy"
>Turns towards the inquisitor
>"Old man you better talk your way out of this mess, or some stupid guards may lose their hands"

Ok, but all she would find is a set of cat burgulars' tools, a wand, an enchanted ceramic ball, astigmatisim correcting glasses, a doll, a surfboard, five earpieces and five wallets with licenses, badges, passports and maybe fifity dollars in assorted pacific currencies in small change.

Oh, she can't confiscate any of that either. As we are all legal members of the International Rescue Services Union, Or just the Union for short, any dispute she has with us must be forwarded to the Union formally. We can't be detained for more then a day and our equipment must not be tampered with and must be returned to us.