How would a pre-industrial society know what a missile is?

They have boarding schools for young men where underclassmen are referred to as such.

>From French missile, from Latin missilis (“that may be thrown”), neuter missile (“a weapon to be thrown, a javelin”), in plural missilia (“presents thrown among the people by the emperors”), from mittere (“to send”).

I actually get around our reliance on greek, latin, etc by implying that all words are simply a translation of the native term to the nearest approximation of our language. "Gentle reader, your author has neither the time nor patience to present a detailed etymological history of the nuances of Felderean languages, nor do I expect you have any true desire to read such. Sufficed to say, a missile is a missile, a lesbian is a lesbian, and let it be known mortals will always try to convey similar idea's so long as their circumstances be like as to each other"

No, because it's a missile of magic. A missile is any projectile. The missile itself is made of magic. A magic missile, if you will.

10/10 made me reply. I'm not even mad.

...

Loogies

Why do they call ammo for slingshots "bullets"? Guns weren't invented yet.

Ohhhhhh user

Have you ever read a book in your life?

>How would a pre-industrial society know what a missile is?

How would a person from our society not know the meaning of missile?

There are missiles hat aren't magic. If you need to sleep for the night, you seek out a magic-user.

He probably only knows of the "thing what has rockets and blows stuff up" kind of missile.

Missile. n. an object (as a stone, arrow, bullet, or rocket) that is dropped, thrown, shot, or launched usually so as to strike something at a distance

Shit thread, kys

>his fantasy culture speaks a real-world language
>not a fictional one
>not saying that the story is simply translated to English for the players' convenience

>he can't write off these hiccups as simple translation
>needs to explain every quirk of his native language which is inconsistent with the fantasy world
All these problems vanish if you say something like "The characters in this universe speak a unique fictional language whose name roughly translates to Common. Our RP is more like an English-localized dub of what the characters are saying in their own tongue."

This may be more simply explained by the fact that the eponymous spell was once known as Melf's Magic Missile. Like Melf's Minute Meteors and Melf's Acid Arrow...(he missed out on his illeteration theme on that last one)

For some reason the spells themselves became very common throughout the various D&D worlds, but after a while someone wondered why, if Bigby was a archmage from Grey Hawk, why in the Nine Hells were mages from Faerun casting Bigby's Pimp Slapping Hand?

I thought it was because it never misses.

If I throw a rock at your head, it's a Missile.
If I throw a fireball of concentrated ethereal energy at your face, it's a Magic Missile.

>Melf's Acid Arrow
Melf's Man Melter? Melf ain't as creative as they think they are.

I still don’t get Tyson. He should be ashamed of himself.

Melf's Magnificently Malicious Man-Melting Missile of Misery (Maximized)

>Melf's Man Melter?

That... sounds like a date rape drug. Now I have this image of Elminister sneaking a potion of feeblemind into a rave.

Man, Melf should create more spells. Like the ones he did in his teens for pranks.
>Melf's Malodorous Milk Machination
>Melf's Mystic Megaphone
>Melf's Miniature Monster
>Melf's Mammary Massager (his own version of Bigby's Hand)
>Melf's Miscellaneous Miscreants

>>Melf's Miscellaneous Miscreants

This was later renamed to Thug Summoning I.
Other Magical Creations attributed to Melf during his tumultuous teenage years include gold and diamond encrusted covers for carrige wheels that cast Hypnotic Pattern 3x Day, as well as the more well known boots of striding and springing for escaping the wrath of the local constabulary.

Name one setting that uses the term.

It's only "pre-industrial" because its post-apocalyptic.

>Not playing your game subtitled.

They'd call it fire missile if it was made of fire. But it's not, it's made of magic.

Isn't it Fire Arrow, though. Why isn't Magic Missile "Magic Arrow" instead?

Arrows are missiles.

>when the DM thinks he's smart and witty as fuck for using "translated" versions of IRL sayings
>"two gryphons with one spell"
>"it's a dragon eat dragon world out there"
>"don't count your basilisk eggs until they're hatched"

Every time I see that retarded and satisfied grin he puts on after blurting out something like that I feel like stabbing myself with the pen until I lose consciousness.

>Miss-aisle

Flame Arrow is a transmutation spell that turns regular arrows into fire arrows.
(Kelgore's) Fire Bolt is the spell you might be thinking of.
And as far as it matters, "Magic Missile" and "Magic Bolt" aren't that different. But Missile has alliteration.

>bitmixing
faggot

>Name one setting that uses the term.
Car Lesbians.

>I still don’t get Tyson
Make tv shows, get money. What's so hard to get? He becomes a lot less insufferable if you stop seeing him as a scientist (which he isn't, he hasn't published in years) and start seeing him as a science journalist.

Nothing like a nice juicy faggot.

Avatar. Rat Queens.

>American education

I have mixed feelings.

On one hand, I like the idea of remixing old sayings and giving them a fantasy flavoring.

On the other, those are pretty damn awkward feeling and if he's being insufferably smug about the conversion, it's groan-worthy at best.

I've done this before, but I actually convert sayings from other countries. For a setting that's lightly based on Polish folklore, I've been stealing their idioms. Since I'm too lazy to dig up what I've actually done before, I'll just do a quick one.

“Don’t divide the skin while it’s still on the bear” becomes "Don't divide the hide while it's still on the dragon."

I think the less used to whatever culture's idioms you are and the less they sound like ones in your culture, the less awkward it is to convert them.

Then it should be called "Magic Hittles".

This is a bad shitpost, and you should feel bad

>if Bigby was a archmage from Grey Hawk, why in the Nine Hells were mages from Faerun casting Bigby's Pimp Slapping Hand?

I've always liked the idea that you can get from one cosmology/setting/universe to another by going through the far realm, much the way that you get from one plane to another by going through the astral realm.

I had a PC in one of my games recently explore the Far Realm for reasons, and he kept his sanity enough to see multiple cosmologies blinking through the insanity. Now he's been talking about making a planar shuttle of some kind.

>I had a PC in one of my games recently explore the Far Realm for reasons, and he kept his sanity enough to see multiple cosmologies blinking through the insanity.

No.
That's not how it works, you dumb piece of shit- Every single Abolethian (Literally lovecraftian pantehon) Elder Evil literally uses the Far Realm as their version of the Astral Plane.

You want to know what happens to people who go to the Far Realm? See Ecology of the Kaorti, read Dragon 330, see Gates of Firestorm peak, read Kobold Quarterly's article on Extradimensional creatures, read Elder Evils, Lords of Madness and Illithiad, Read the Epic level handbook, the Manual of the Planes-

The Far realm is literally the only part of D&D that would require a series of complex mathematical rolls for every turn taken in it, rolls for the sanity table, rolls for Uuvadum not taking notice of you, rolls for not fucking up healign spells which literally irrevoacbly mutate you, rolls for not literally getting digested by the warped space of the place itself, rolls for the weather being literally every weather effect in D&D- including arcane weather, and rolls for existing in multiple spaces at once, warped and wrapped over these areas a Non-euclidean creatures attack, which is so fuckign difficult to process it isn't even funny, what with motion/combined with the distortion of senses, voices in your head, and microorganisms that literally are anethema to any degree of biological makeup and point of reference science as we know it has, because everything in the Far Realm is a constant, dynamic fluxuating variable that is literally the Great- Old one grandfather of tha largest Wild magic tables ever Concieved.

The Cerebral blots in Dragon 330 are literally "That area full of monsters that can wipe a party in a JRPG you find that has the extra boss stronger than the main campaigns boss inside of it."

It's a Cluster fuck in there, and 4e should have never have changed it into the open fucking watered down thing that missed the entire point.

Oh right- thing about Cerebral Blots, the core of these things? Miniscule portals to Azathoth's Court- they even quote the fucking bards beign heard playing there- which Is also a phenominal cosmic memetic reasoning for why Bards are the way they are- they're literally performing an art that has been active since the dawn of everything that is- followed by the expanse of the gate that covers just about ever degree of 'metaverse' you can think of in any OOC cross-setting character context ever.

The same way John Paul Jones knew what a torpedo was.

Truth be told- the ONLY way to effectively traverse the far realm is to BE an abberation- choice Ooze or Outsider- and even then, you'd still run the risk of encountering the active projected concioussness of any setting based Elder Evil, The Great Old Ones, Outer Gods, and Alternate reality Successful post-ascension Tharizdun, the Epic-level Encounters and Epic-level psudonatural Creatures are just the icing on the shitcake here.

The other (Possiblity) for traveling the Far Realm is hitching a ride on such creatures via Psionic/magical transferance of concioussness or Being a Necromancer that is Ainz Ooal Gown/Chosen of Mystra tier, so you are able to drop every conceivable meta- Chaoslife freak dead, no matter how tiny as you traverse a place devoid of static constants- but nothing stops them from actually hurting you or figuring out your makeup to unmake you, because there are actually two nasty-tricks Psionics can employ to eradicate you, one being a Metamagic that bypasses the undead being immune to Mind-affecting spells, the other literally just severing your connection to the Plane of Negative energy, shown with the Illithid.

This isn't even accounting for things like say- Something Yogg-Saron from Warcraft would do, which is to simply impose mortality to parasitism on you to work it's brand of corruption on you.

The longest time spent in the Far Realm is at least 3-5 minutes (Or was it a minute) And that was with the Elder Elves that ended up becoming the entire Kaorti species after the Concioussness of the Feasting Vat gazed upon them.

Also- no I have no idea if slapping Mordenkains Silver Key onto a Gith Silver sword would technically allow you to use that minor part of Yog-sothoth to find the Consciousness of Cthulhu and sever it, sending it right back to his body in Ry'leh, or what happens if you use the vestige, Otiax there, which is literally just Yog-Sothoth by proxy.

Oh, let's not forget the fact that the ONLY thing that could ward the fuckery present in the realm- barring being a super Aura-whore Death-machine is to have the Elder Sign- which doesn't exist in all of D&D due to Yog-Sothoth's banishment and the Alignment system actually acting as temporal seals against the conditions that allow Lovecraft's pantheon to come to be in reality- which leaves you with a lesser Elder Sign- the Cerulean Sign- something that is already, balls to the wall rare as fuck.

The only way of getting to the Far Realm unscathed is usually by becoming Elder Evil yourself- or becoming a 10th level Alienist and getting the Bloodborne Milkweed rune Treatment.

Last time that happened, it was in the NWN2 Ending, and boy- did you leave a mess behind.

underrated post

I know it gets overused in ff14's dialogue but I really like anyroad and "by the gods"

All I really looked through was the Manual of the Planes, when the PC decided to try to go there. There wasn't a lot of information on there, other than the whole 'roll will save to not go permanently insane', 'time doesn't exist', and 'made up of layers of reality'

They succeeded the save, and as a way for me to buy time to research it, I decided that the PC somehow made it back the same moment he left, since time doesn't exist on the Far Realm.

Anyway, the way I'll be using it, there's mention of multiple layers- each one a plane unto it's own, that you can end up lost in just by thinking improperly. An 'ana-kata' compared to 'up-down', 'north-south', and 'east-west'. Too far Ana, and you end up deep in the shit... Basically the kind of stuff you're talking about.
Too far 'Kata', however, you get... well, less far, closer to reality, whatever you'd like to call it.

The character in question is an aberration, though, and aced their will save, so I didn't figure it would be as instantly character-endingly fatal as if they were a humanoid.

Not to mention, my players tend to be lazy ones that want to be spoonfed. I don't want to punish them for showing initiative.

The layer's of reality thing? You know that shit with mirrors when you put two next to one another? Imagine at least the 12th row down that spiral of infinity a part og your body is actually there whilst still being in the current layer.

Now- continuously multiply this, and how utterly fucked it looks with spells like mirror image, whispers, literal clipping- and in addition, time not being a constant so sometimes things look like you're in a working lagspike as in addition to this you have a complete overload of visual stimuli that looks like the wizard had too much preptime for his spellls and now everything is oversaturated over everything.

And all of this occurs in the span of what you'd perceive as 6 seconds- changing, and getting worse the deeper you go into the phenomenal cosmic space-onion plane.

Also, the Place is alive, and it CAN attempt to digest you, and certain spells don't work there as intended, divination is pretty much suicide, healing of any kind is a high risk factor or end up looking like Wilbur Whately, and again, Elder Evil consciousness immediately noticing you for being a non-aberration which on discovery utterly destroys your ego, self, and memories and remakes you core up due to this creature existing as a higher concioussness and effectively quantum-physicking you into an entirely different being.

Now, Aberrations would get- most of what goes on here- except that's actually not 100%, because that leads to the implication of the Aberration being 100% native to the far realm, as some issues of creature are aberrations because they're warped beings that don't conform to human understanding through means of mutation and alien thought patterns- a good example of this is that you'd only encounter one variantion of Illithid in your travels there, whereas the only sort of beholder you'd encounter in the Far Realm would be Pseudonatural ones, one presented in a Web Enhancement to note- and Half-far Spawn

Ironically- places of safety in the Far realm are probably going to be pocket planes and Demiplanes, use of Cerebrant abilities, or Kaorti Blots- though they've no need of them in their native home- which is an issue of sorts.

Also- there's the issue of getting back home- which unfortunately is very unlikely as there's only one (sort of) active portal out of the Far realm, located in an abandoned city that got fucked for screwing around with the far realm- unfortunate that the portals are static and preceded by a colonly of Wystes, and literally being stuck, waiting until the Stars are right- or rather for a comet which powers the gate in firestorm peak.

I think there is a way to the Far Realm in the Abyss and in THE Aboleth Capital though, sadly, both are fucked because the Abyss exit is mostly likely in Dagon or the Pale Night's domains, and you don't enter THE Aboleth Capital and escape, due to the Eldest sleeping atop the entire structure. Runes of madness everywhere, the native application of the Aboleth/charm/calling enchantment they put on their cities to attract potential thralls, Aboleth Savants, alienists and Pseudonaturals everywhere and Psionics out the ass- nevermind artefacts and objects from Spelljammer, and the Savage Period of time back when the humnaoid races were being dealt with by Chaotic, violent Gods around the time when The queen of Chaos was still active and Demogogron had yet to take the stage.

Also, probably so fucking far underwater you'd turn to jello from the pressure.

If I recall though- you might strike luck and meet Halaster there though- It'd make sense HE would locate you as he's fucked with shit man was not meant to know, evident by his students and himself included, or you could find a mooncalf, which might lead the way out, because It turns out they're actually a variant species that the developers couldn't decide whether to make Outsiders, Aberattions or magical creatures and gave them an entire NE Deity pantheon and the abiltieis to cause some interesting Omens- they're technically D&D Byhakke.

>And as far as it matters, "Magic Missile" and "Magic Bolt" aren't that different. But Missile has alliteration.
And "missile" sounds cooler to modern people, because they associate it with guided, rocket-powered precision destruction.

I sometimes wonder if posts like these are bait, but there are a lot of them and they can't all be bait. Did user try to make a dumb thread on purpose or did user make a dumb thread unintentionally? I guess we'll never know.

There was an incredible treatise on this in one of the old, defunct gaming sites.

I'll post it later.

But one of the core - and most terrifying - facets of this is that while the elemental forces have sway on every plan to one degree or another - fire, earth, air, water, positive energy, negative wenergy - there are only two in the far realm.

Mind and flesh.

Literally everything that is matter is living or dead flesh, incluiding the medium you move through. And mind is constantly generating intelligence (even if it only momentary) from blabbling idiots to vast alien intelligences that span multiple levels of the Far Realm. The Flesh is malleable to the mind, wehich means as long as you think you can breathe it, you're fine. You think you can't, and suddenly you're strangling as your body intersects with multiple levels of living and dead flesh that makes up the reality of the Far Realm.

It is a very bad place, and it doesn't like you.

The same way they knew what gender was.
They just nodded whenever it was brought up,yo.

Wouldn't put it past the creepy fucker

I'm with you. It's like a magic bullet. Magic could be in any spell name but for a missile to never miss, that's magic.

Including flesh as an element is retarded. Where's the plane of wood? And the plane of maple syrup? Where's the plane of dung? None of this is elemental.

No - it's isn't an element anywhere but the Far Realm. That's the point. It's WRONG, alien, and ALIVE, filled with insane, random mental constructs that THINK.

> The penis is evil.

...

That's only one part of the place really. And that's closer to the 40k Warp. Except that they hinted in the Psionics handbook and Eberron that Slaanesh might be real.

I think this is just the case where I would go "yeah, whatever, make like 5 save roll; we see what happen and I make some roll beyind my screen."

It's a missile made of magic. Magic Missile.

It's a ball made of fire. Fireball.