Be a cleric

DnD style gods are less objects of worship in most cases and more powerful patrons, with their churches being more clubs or guilds or the like. It's less faith and eschatology when they're definitely real and often don't have much of a moral code or theology. Just turn in enough prayerbux to get that sweet new blessings

I never said you were shitposting. I said that the image you had posted was pre-ironic. By that, I mean that the image looks like a meme from the times of pre-irony. The era of rage comics and the like. 2006. it looks like a very classical style meme. It employs dry humor in both it's presentation and it's subject matter. In plain white text, it reads a simple joke. But a joke that would likely be made by a NON-NORMIE, as they would not understand the humor of Veeky Forums and dnd. So why would a non-normie use classical style meme text on a plain image telling a simple joke? It's simple! It's before the classic meme text, (CMT.) was no longer used by non-normie meme makers. Therefor this image was made before the elements in it were ironic. in other words, it's PRE-IRONIC, got me?

>Pointing out the blatantly obvious fact that modern DnD sucks is now an "agenda".

You can go back to your containment topic if you need a safe space. I'm pretty sure 5eg is a near-constant thread on this board.

Wow, you contrarian trolls really have no breaks when it comes to shitposting. You're not even trying to disguise yourselves any more.

Or, are you actually this oblivious?

>it's usually not whichever god has done the most miracles for them personally.

Most people don't travel with a magical priest that heals and protects them while invoking their god's name.

It's not even shitposting, you're just over-reacting and looking for a fight. Again, everyone is content to ignore you and leave you be in your special safe space, but come out into the open and act blatantly retarded and you're gonna get called blatantly retarded. Being a DnDrone outside of a [insert edition number]-general thread is like being a Brony outside of /mlp/.

Please stop overreacting and thinking there's some big "agenda" or conspiracy about you just because not everyone in the world worships your crappy taste. The internet is full of assholes, just because someone's being an asshole to YOU doesn't make you special, kid.

I'd chastise you for taking the bait, but that actually kinda great to read.

Please don't take it in the future though, for everyone's sake.

>"Yeah, Wizard and Rogue players, you should definitely convert to my God of Shouting and Melee Combat! It will be great!"

Holy shit, you trolls are not just obnoxious, you're insane.

The majority of the roleplayers on this board play D&D. The majority of the remainder don't feel strongly for or against it.

It's only the most bitter of bitter cunts who go out of their way to shitpost at every oppurtunity about a game they don't play.

You trying to put on airs and pretend your minority view is the status quo is embarassing. The more effort you put 8n your shitposting, the more pathetic you appear to the rest of this board.

Now, quit derailing yet another thread because it tangentially triggered you.

You could just, y'know, ignore them, like they're ignoring you (now). One of the guys you're responding to didn't even say anything about DnD...

>Wizards can't worship a god of melee
Why not? I don't need to be the Sun to worship the god of dawn.

It doesn't even matter, worshipping a god doesn't instantly give you powers. You still have to be "special" or "chosen" or whatever. The PHB explicitely states this if we're talking DnD. Anyone can be a priest, but not everyone can be a Cleric.

Basicaly in that sence god is just an employer.

Technically, anyone can be a cleric, it's just that it requires a lot of study, devotion, and being initiated into the church.

Sometimes other religions have benefits greater than healing. For example, my wizard is a member of what is basically the cult of Bacchus. Any attempts to convert him will fail when it turns out the other religion doesn't have drunken orgies in the woods.

>The majority of the roleplayers on this board play D&D
you really showed him gonna post this on fb

While utterly reprehensible, a fair point.

Cleric's Powers
Almost all the folk in the world who revere a deity live their lives without ever being directly touched by a divine being. As such, they can never know what it feels like to be a cleric- someone who is not only a devout worshiper, but who has also been invested with a measure of a deity's power.

Literally from the PHB. You pretty much literally have to be special/lucky. Worshipping a god is NOT enough.

I don't make rules for Mearls and Crawford's DnD, I just play the.

Hell mate. I spend most of my time on 5eg, and even I think you need to grow the fuck up. D&D isn't perfect, pretending otherwise just makes you look like a moron. I recommend leaving Veeky Forums and coming back when you grow a thicker skin.

Depends on the setting. In mine you need some combination of exceptional devotion, the natural talent required to channel magic in the first place, and the constitution necessary to be a conduit for divine magic and not explode.

No one said D&D is perfect. Don't strawman just for the sake of trying to defend deliberate and obvious trolls.
We're literally talking about shitposters who, whenever there's a thread even tangentially related to a system they don't play, come in to shitpost about how everyone should stop playing it. If you want to talk about people who need a thicker skin, you should first address the people who come to a place where RPGs are discussed, and get butthurt at the mere thought that people are playing the most popular system.

Kiddo someone disagreeing with you doesn't make them a troll.
And the only people who need a thicker skin is the one pitching a fit over a mindless, memey shitpost, which is (you).

You go on these crusades every time anyone even slightly mentions anything bad about DnD. Fuck, you snap at people who are AGREEING with you if they're not agreeing hard enough. When it comes to insane and obnoxious, maybe try looking in a mirror. Or coming back when you're 18. This is an 18+ board after all.

While we're at it, another thread needs you to defend DnD, oh brave internet knight.

Lots of people worship the gods and don't have powers, but it's less that clerics are THE CHOSEN ONES, and more that they are the few who have the capacity for investiture.

Sort of like how anyone can try to study and become a wizard, but very few have the actual capability to become one. Whether or not a wizard was destined to be a wizard is really just a chicken-egg problem.

It's not "defending D&D". It's calling out shitposting.
Coming into threads just to tell people to stop playing a game you don't like is pure and simple shitposting, no matter what airs you try to put on it or how rampant this particular brand of shitposting is. Now, quit derailing this thread just to show off how buttmad you are.

You're a god who can literally create worlds and create life. Don't feed me that "investiture" bullshit. Clerics have the power to cast Revive Dead and Reincarnate, which means their gods can perform such things even easier... they can make anyone suitable for investiture, easily. They're just obnoxious poorly-written assholes who have to pick you on a whim because LOL DND LORE.

>Calling out shitposting.

Why? Fucking why? Be a fucking adult and ignore it like everyone else. Now please kindly fuck off until you turn 18 and can actually be on this website, thanks.

Monotheist pls go and stay go, we have a decent pantheon around here.

>People don't agree with me so they're shitposting.

Kiddo, have you ever been to /a/, or /v/, or any board on Veeky Forums? Telling someone they have shit taste is how things work around here. We're not tumblr or reddit, the mods aren't here to coddle your super delicate safe space. If this is getting you bothered enough to start screaming "trolling" and you're buttmad!" every 5 minutes, hooo boy, you're gonna be dead from a stress-induced stroke before you're actually old enough to post here for real.

>Clerics have the power to cast Revive Dead and Reincarnate, which means their gods can perform such things even easier.

Not on the Material Plane. Gods actually have a lot of limitations when it comes to affecting the Material Plane, which is why spells like Raise Dead require not only particularly rare and powerful clerics, but costly material components. Some demigods are not even capable of bestowing their followers with such high level spells because they simply don't have enough worshipers.

While they can certainly steer and to some extent influence the material plane, gods are not omnipotent or even close to it, and are competing against dozens if not hundreds of other divine forces. They have comparatively limited control compared to singular deities or small pantheons, and certainly don't have anything close to what might be called power over destiny. They might try to influence people so that they become more suitable to becoming a cleric even from birth, but at the same time an enterprising person who studies hard, is devout and wise, and is aligned with their deities dogma would be able to attract the attention of their deity later in life, especially if they were sponsored and indoctrinated by another cleric.

>shitposing is fine outside of /b/ and the other dedicated shitposting boards
>this is what newfags who haven't actually read the rules actually think

Man up, thicken your skin, and quit being a little bitch because people are getting tired of you forcing your little agenda-oriented "meme" at every opportunity.

I'm just gonna start linking back to people who have already answered you.

see

And I'll do the same.

>My Fighter and the party's Cleric are devout followers of Dol Dorn and Dol Arrah respectively
>the other party members are godless heathens and the Warlock even has pacts with fucking demons
>we're the only responsible members of the party and it's like herding a bunch of murderous cats

Guys I don't think a Dol Dorn zealot should be considered the second most level-headed member of a party what do I do?

It doesn't work when you're linking to your own posts.
In before shitty photoshopped "proof" that it's not you.

>To be fair, in DnD there's not much difference between gods and cretures tht are just really really powerful.

Actually, there is, in the form of Divine Ranks. There are powerful outsiders with higher CRs than some demigods, but the demigods get far more benefit from worship and have certain powers that make them much more difficult to deal with (but also have certain limitations, including losing power if they don't have enough worshipers).

Them giving themselves a scoring system doesn't actually change the reality of the situation at all.

Here's the "photoshopped" proof that those posts are not mine, now can you please shut up.

Hahaha, holy shit, he actually did it, he actually took the time to photoshop the (you)s out of his screen shot to save face on an anonymous image board. After calling everyone else buttmad and newfags. Oh my god, it hurts to laugh.

It does when that scoring system includes powers like "Untouchable AC unless the attacker also has a divine rank" and "Omnipotent control while within your localized domain"

If you stat it, players will find a way to kill it. AC is easily bypassed by something as simple as Magic Missile.

The difference here is that you're not actually answering me at all, it's just you screeching the same thing over and over.

Anyway, I have a job to get ready for, so I guess you "win" whenever you make your next post and get the last word or whatever. I've already gotten dragged into this for far too long already, as fun as it is. Have a nice day, let's not do this again.

Sorry to everyone else, shit happens sometimes, hard not to get drawn into every once in awhile.

But, that's when things like immunity to mortal magic comes into play thanks to Divine Spell Resistance. And, for things that get around Spell Resistance, they have divine-specific counters to that too.

Basically, if you want to kill a deity, you're going to need DM approval every step of the way.

I never realized that.

KA stop posting

KA ALL OF THE POSTS ARE (YOU)

Please, just ignore him.

...

It's more like Afterlife Insurance.

>be a cleric
>use your powers on non-believers
Found the problem.
If they have time to call for help,
they have time to know de wey.

didn't mike mearls fire you recently from DnD in order to get dumbs???

I did
Other systems suck
D&D is still best for fantasy

why did you make an entire thread for this?

He's an animist, though.

It’s not gey if u know de way

I've successfully converted at least 2 party members the last 3 times I've played a holy warrior. I always ham it up being very vocal about my God, and why he should be revered above the rest/how much ass he kicks, and how benevolent he can be despite worshipping Not!Khorne/Not!khaine. Honestly if you're not devoting you entire being to your gods worship/praise and not converting heathens and not slaughtering/smiting enemies of your god what are you even doing?

This. It's more about getting the party to honor or revere your god rather than worship them.