Objective: Court the Dragoness

>the gentry are courting the dragon again
The king outta outlaw this kind of shit.

>Post-mission debrief

Go ahead if that satisfies you, but I only deal in DRAGONS. There's no glory to be had from putting down some uppity bitch-wyrm.

Buy her jewelry, just like any woman

Because it works or because the gentry keep on dying without clear lines of succession?

...

Please be near London.

And so it begins.

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Find out what she likes
Become what impresses her

How about I bully it instead

I was just about to post that

Imma bully her cloaca with my dick

...

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Me too user, me too.

>Worry

thicc

...

And this is the daughter you'd have with her

Done.

...

...

Sauce?

All lusty thoughts aside, what would actually happen if an adventurer rolled up and tried to seduce a dragoness?

>Vorefags

...

Spelunking traditionally refers to another hole user

Depends
>How does said adventurer go about the whole thing?
>Is the dragoness annoyed?
>Could the adventurer beat the dragon in a fight?
>What is the general attitude and personality of the dragoness?

And so on.

It turns out it was a male dragon and it's that time of the year.

>what would actually happen if an adventurer rolled up and tried to seduce a dragoness
The dragoness entertains the notion until they decide you are either lying, or actually serious yet can offer them nothing they need upon which they kill or ignore you. Seriously, imagine what it would be like if a fucking ant tried to seduce you. There's no frame of reference for attraction and little they have that you want on account of them being so vastly inferior.

Given the number of half dragons in the world I'd assume it'd go a bit further than that actually

Although that is true I am going off of what I believe would actually happen, vs what popular fantasy media has peddled for the sake of selling a template and various books.

Not that user, but unbirth is a subset of vore. A fun subset.

Wouldn't it be a lower DC, since I'd imagine a dragon's asshole is larger than a human's. Though, I suppose it'd increase if the dragon's putting effort into keeping the person _inside.

Isn't it generally only the females of a species with a pronounced fertility cycle?

>ant
Closer to a pigeon or a garter snake. So, considering some things I've seen on this site, it all depends on the dragon you find.

Alternative Objective: No.

If you're entertaining enough, the dragon may tease and taunt you, and then let you go, of course not with any of their treasure. Maybe they might keep you around and play with you a little bit, or send you packing with all your clothes off. But I like my dragons less always evil and more just richfags.

>Not that user, but unbirth is a subset of vore.
Good point

>A fun subset.
Also a good point

>Wouldn't it be a lower DC, since I'd imagine a dragon's asshole is larger than a human's. Though, I suppose it'd increase if the dragon's putting effort into keeping the person _inside.
>Try to court a dragoness
>Good news, getting in is the easy part,
>The two of you hit it off REALLY well all things considered and before you know it the two of you are in her lair exploring the depths of her 'cave'
>Bad news, getting a second date is entirely dependent upon getting out of there and she's enjoying you in there too much to make it easy

>Hired by big-city snob noble
>Wants the party to deliver a message to the draconic owner of a mountain cave, far to the east
>Figures you'll do a better job of it than some shmuck messenger, and has the cash to make it interesting for your group
>Two weeks and half a mile of climbing and travel later, make it to the cave
>Clawmarks all over the mouth of the cave, a few discarded scales, scorched stone, clear signs of dragon
>A single, massive, silvery eye gleams in the dark
>Force the bard to the front with the message, as he's the most likeable
>"We're not here for a fight. Lord Fuckhead has sent us with a message."
>The dragon gestures with a massive claw and grumbles, "Read it aloud, then."
>The bard breaks the seal and reads it over, then looks nervous
>"You, uh... your presence in this mountain is apparently disturbing his mining operation. You're being summoned to court, three weeks from now."
>There's an awkward pause
>The massive claw reaches out from the dark and delicately takes the paper from the bard's hands, then withdraws with it
>A moment of reading later, the claw returns with a large map, stained with the blood of the last owner
>"Mark the lands known to be owned by this arrogant whelp and leave the map. Return to him. Tell him that I'll be be there, and that he'll regret being late."

1d4chan.org/wiki/Johnniass_Dragonraper

I love me a good bit of Dragon vore/unbirth.

I literally just realized that this was a Valentine's thread.

Why not keep you as a pet/sextoy/part of her hoard?

Not really a matter of good or evil in my opinion. I imagine humans would be lucky to be considered on the same level as an intruding dog that does not belong to them, vs the myriad other animals humans consider as worthless, pests, or worse...an outright danger that should be destroyed.

Secretly, user?
So do most people on this board.
The few times we can keep a thread like this up, out come the writefags with greens galore, and out come the MechaniFags to justify vore mechanics in your game of choice.

heavy fugging

>the dragoness has to save a captured knight

>not using her dragon-lady parts as a mobile sleeping bag for your travels

First I would find a non yucky way to achieve immortality. Then I would conquer a small country and present the riches as tribute.

I imagine maintaining a healthy sex life would be impossible.

archive.4plebs.org/tg/thread/57127636/#57139955

Is this your answer?

>The rest of the party swiftly exits
>The bard, however, hangs back
>The dragons eyes narrow and snarls,
>"Your business is done here, human. Leave."
>The bard shuffles around a bit, then clears his throat
>"S-so, uh, you have any plans for the evening?"

Just got to spice things up

>Crtl+F 'Hydra'
>No Results
And people wonder why Veeky Forums is dying. Full of bandwagoning 5eniggers with their babby's basic lore, podcasts, streams and women who got into it through Stranger Things. If you want to fuck a dragon, you get it a fucking Hydra, it's literally their favorite food, and the scales of the beasts literally can be boiled to make a phermone that practically makes you irresistible to Dragons airbourne It's literally the Ilk of Draconic Catnip.

Another thing- does anyone know why Dragons don't fucking fish? Fuckers could scoop sharks out of the ocean for a fucking meal if they wanted one. Black Dragons literally Pahjeet Swamps and water to death by shitting in their desginated shitting swamps.

Depends on how adept you or the dragon is at magic.

This guy fucks dragonesses.

>actual advice on how to fuck a dragoness
Teach me your ways, master.

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>not paying a dragon to keister your party and smuggle you into all sorts of evil lairs safe in the confines of their cavernous ass

>this fucking thread
You know, with Veeky Forums fucking dragons is as old as the board itself. I'm used to it.

But vore? Jesus Christ, guys, that's genuinely disturbing.

What if the dragoness braps?

Personally I’d use it as an initiative bonus and try to hit the closest enemy as I flew past.

That seems to be something more akin to a degenerate fucking his pet dog/horse/goat/human, only in Fantasy Land it results in half-dragon offspring

Wouldn't that get your equipment all soggy, though?

Knowing Dragon-Lore helps, having class levels in something related to dragon-lore helps, and obviously doing trials and quests for the Dragon in terms of sorting out territorial disputes- additionally, better means to Dragon-fucking include catching them in human form if they're sociable Dragons, Forgotten realms latently depicts a number of Dragons who have massive Xenophile tennacies, a literal Weredragon Drow Maneater, and a Green Dragon who is known for how good it is at fucking oral that it does combat with blowjobs.

I'm not making that up, that is a fucking thing. The next thing on your list is simply Being Nietzsche Master-mentality as fuck, Draco-pussy comes your way if it's in the area and you've got money to spend on Bards out the ass, as well as being High CHA and doing outrageous crap. The cult of the Dragon is a way to get Draco-pussy, but they're all fucking Betas- but If you reach Conan/Chad/bane standards, then Evil Dragons will WANT you- Trading with a Dragon that has a prominent Hoard, is also a thing you can do- then there's the matter of Dragons who literally play the "great game" which is literally motherfucking Vampire The Masquerade Jyhad with Dragons, and that's a surefire way of getting draco-pussy and meeting dragons.

Also, Neverwinter Nights confirms Dragons have Cloaca's- so It's the way of the Polymorph if you want Vagina involved.

Slaying a female Dragons Entire Brood, professing the superiority of your being and thus- seed, is also a great way of getting laid- if it works, that is- Blue Dragons and Reds I find are the ones that are into Bizzarro reproduction antics Blues to note, have had the most coverage on that, NWN2's SOU campaign, and Borak from 3.5 are some of the biggest examples of this.

Alternatively- killing a Female Dragon and taking the kids is one way to get Dracopussy- in that creepy grooming sense- Raising a Dragon is something found in the best of Dragon Magazine articles, and the like of the Draconomico

Hire a giant to do it, give him riches to impress her and then we can forget about the disturbing amount of vore in this thread

Interesting. So being a rich, sociable warrior-scholar is the most surefire way of getting laid without having to murder any part of the dragons existing family (which may or may not work, depending on the temperament of the dragon in question).

I assume these are more tips for one-off draconic booty calls, and that there isn't really a way for a human to genuinely court and engage in a long-lasting relationship with a dragon (mostly because a dragon will outlive a human by several orders of magnitude).

>human form
What do you take me for, some kind of coward?

Red Dragons are ironically- the most sociable, but they're the most predatory, short-tempered Dragons of the Lot, so unless you've got power, it's you showing the expect fear and respect whilst being silver-tongued enough to tickle it's ego and fancy, till you can stroke it a little bit more to romantic interest- this comes down to the fact that most of the time, they do see just about everything else as possessions and food, but er- let's say they're at the border of either you getting eaten, or you getting "eaten". A Make or break sort of social challenge, I should also note that Reds are ridiculously proud and in other cases when it comes to their kids, Super Traditional- that is to say, they're always a pedigree sort, you won't a place in the hoard unless it can recognize your worth, something difficult to do, because they often judge by appearance alone. They keep you around because you amuse them, and as a game to see when the fancy of them wanting to eat you comes along- but end up forming a bond of sorts with you until they actually became attached, even if pride won't let them admit it until the longest and furthest parts of the relationship- conflict and risk to safety comes from the fact that relationships with reds are very competitive, too submissive and you're getting eaten, too dominant, and you're a threat- lest you are powerful enough to subsume the Red and make them love you for it. Despite this, I will note that they do provide a little interest in the ilk of minions- Dragons can dominate and easily enslave, enthrall or convince others to work under them via different means- but sometimes younger or ones that do not have much in the way of knowing their own fuckhueg history offer debts and boons. Hooking the evils ones up with infrastructure is a way to curry favour with them at the very least.

Oh right, the Blowjob dragon is also a thief that sneaks into peoples campsites at night to 'lighten their load'

Silver Dragons are massive sociable, as they've this creed of living shitloads of identities out over their long lifespans and taking shitloads of lovers, there was a Dragon magazine Article of this I think- Changeling who became a Silver Dragon's lover for the last period of his lifespan/him going into stasis to be reborn over an extremly long period of time, their hoards are actually massive collections of sentimental objects valued from the lives and identities they lived out to completion, literal rooms full of feels. You're most likely to find them in urban centers as the talk of the town who's that girl noble or simply the "Waifu." getting with them just means being the most interesting person you can be- or at least most hobby driven dude and the like- you get the idea.

Also- if you're a short-tempered manlet who never gives up and puts up with Red Dragon bullying and showing defiance, they may also fuck you- as more of a plaything than a romantic interest- if only to eat you later.

Gold Dragons literally have the most honey-suckled motherly voices on the fucking planes, every single one is literally "The very incarnation of every lovely cottage grandmother/child carer with curly hair, slightly chubby body and a smile that warms your heart that always did bakery and cooking and was literally fairy godmother tier." You don't play these women, you court them and you live happily ever after- but the standards you have to have and person you have to be is so LG that you're beaming. Only an absolute bastard kills Golds or talks shit about them, and he is a brigand and Blackguard of the worst sort.

You could trust these Dragons to raise children, these are the Dragons you entrust the legendary children to fulfil the ancient prophecy with who reads the kids bedtime stories wearing glasses near the fireplace. I suggest getting them those magically enchanted pillows, and-
being selfless, kind, empathetic and generally being a hard person with a soft interior to talk about the stresses of moral dilemma and openness from fighting the forces or evil or something.

Just remember, unless you bring it forward, they will ara-ara you away because they are probably going to be older than you- your best bet is to be that dude they probably had a crush on or something along the lines of hubby material.

At least, that's the impression I got when I met my first one in the first Neverwinter Nights campaign, that Goldie was pure love.

>Trying to sue a dragon

I thought I knew what gall was. I was mistaken.

bard crafts a book on dragonslaying.jpg

>literal Weredragon Drow Maneater, and a Green Dragon who is known for how good it is at fucking oral that it does combat with blowjobs.
Where can I find more about these?

>then we can forget about the disturbing amount of vore in this thread
We both know this stain will never wash away

I can hope

Also- Dragons and Giants never get along- Fuck giants up, and Dragons will show gratitude for it/increase in population. Additionally, You'd also get more prestige if you kill Fire Giants, the ultimate invasive literal Manlets by Giant Standards Giants that real dwarves and Red Dragons hate- sometimes. Also, there's the option of getting a Giant sacrificed to a Dragon, the recovery of Dragon artefacts and ones made from dead dragons to also consider-
See the picture filename.

Knight: I am going to boop the Snoot!
Dragon: Please dont boop the Snoot.
Knight: Oh it is happening.

>Be wizard
>Go back in time to when the dragoness was hatched
>Raise her to be the perfect wife

>wizard memes
almost as disgusting as vorefags

>everyone claims they are supposed to be good, and wise
>somehow manage to have worse temper tantrums than the usually evil western type dragons

Kangaroo or regular?

>not just befriending the hydra

Holy shit have you ever even touched a girl before you filthy fucking virgin?

>three to five heads
>they all giggle and whisper to eachother when you walk by
>one of them finally gets the nerve to say something to you
>turn around and look at it, giving it your undivided attention
>it looks flustered, can't get a word out
>give it a kiss on the snout and walk away
>watch as they begin to flail helplessly, slamming into the water splashing around in the lake in a mix of embarrassment, excitement, and gossip

I then sniped the fuck out of it because the damn thing kept spitting water at me when I was trying to go fight that fat fuck in the tower

m8- hydra in D&D are dumb animals. Read their ecology lad. Though I will say the whole OOts head regen thing means you could get yourself limitless dragon Asredisiac if you also had a ring of regeneration/sustenance to pop on the beast.

In our indie/homebrew apparently the DM decided that dragons have a “walking form” where they will moonlight as a member of a humanoid race, either one their elder god made or another dracoid.
This was not made clear to the players.
Found out GF was a dragon... just assumed she was a min/maxed high cleric with mild autism.
I woke up with a funny tattoo so I guess I’m legally her property now

youtube.com/watch?v=MQaDq01M-O4

>Those Digits
Asmodeus! getting topped by your sister as per usual I see! Keep eating those fedora tippers, I'm sure they'll get your dick working after she bit it off!

I love that idea.

Your picture reminds me of Christopher Walken

See, you're
>Implying
That you're an oldfag by your statement of the age of Dragon threads... but you've proven yourself a newfag by acting like vorefaggotry is new, or at least uncommon, on Veeky Forums.

The Veeky Forums vorefags are prevalent enough to have their own designation, dude.

You'd be pissed too if you had to live in China.

I never implied to be an oldfag, I'm just aware that thread like these have been going on for a long time and I've been seeing them since I got here.
>vorefaggotry is new
I never implied that, you raging moron. I'm just saying it's fucking disgusting.

Not that user, but you did imply it, intentionally or otherwise. It's phrased as "scaly is old, so I'm used to it, but I'm not used to vore [therefore it's not new]" relying on the unspoken premise of "I can get used to HERESY given enough time."