This is a Katana. It is the finest cutting instrument ever invented by man...

This is a Katana. It is the finest cutting instrument ever invented by man. Capable of slicing through case hardened steel and cutting a man in half with a single fluid action. The secret of its power lies in its unique forging process. A slab of the highest quality steel is brought from the Moon with the aid of Tengu, then shipments of platinum dust are imported, each speck of dust being personally inspected by a master geologist for purity. After this, the slab of steel and dust are slowly whittled down over the course of a century. Requiring three generations of master sword smiths to lovingly work away a few millimeters of the steel slab using platinum laced sanding paper, each day. After a century of hard work the shape of the blade is slowly formed. If found lacking, the process is repeated. If found acceptable, the process is repeated. It isn't until perfection is reached that the sword is deemed complete. The final shape of the blade is then folded seven hundred times over the volcanic flame of Mount Fuji, each fold doubling the cutting potential of the blade. Afterwards, the oldest tree in all the world is found and cut down to make the sheath and handle for the sword, which are blessed by the Emperor of Japan himself, bestowing magical power into the wood. Not to enhance the blade, but to protect the user while carrying it, so he himself is not cut in two. Finally the blade is cooled in the blood of a hundred foreign kings so that it acquires a taste for its true enemies.

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>0-60 real damn quick

See, learning can be fun!

I felt inspired by the D20 jokes surrounding this legendary sword, so I figured I'd try my hand at creating some copy pasta level bullshit.

so if it takes a hundred years to make, then there would be what, a max of 5 or 6 if you stretch it. that's not even counting the fact that you have to find the oldest tree in the world. not in all of Japan, but the whole world.

that i can all belive

what i can't believe is that you need the blood of a hundred foreign kings. is one kings blood worth more than another? is the blood of the Pope worth more than the blood of a backwater tribe leader in africa? does the quantity of the blood matter, or do you just need a drop? other than it being the best damn choppa that did chop, what is it good for? who gets to use it if not the emperor himself?

Could be an interesting backstory for an artifact blade
ayy

>what i can't believe is that you need the blood of a hundred foreign kings. is one kings blood worth more than another? is the blood of the Pope worth more than the blood of a backwater tribe leader in africa?

These shitbloods are all equally low before us.

okay, but what is it about the blood of a shitblood king that makes a difference compared to just a normal shitblood?

>max of 5 or 6
They seek each other out for supremacy, so there's only ever one or two at once. That doesn't last long. Entire civilizations have been lost because of this. Japan is far older than any of us realize.

>what i can't believe is that you need the blood of a hundred foreign kings. is one kings blood worth more than another? is the blood of the Pope worth more than the blood of a backwater tribe leader in africa? does the quantity of the blood matter, or do you just need a drop? other than it being the best damn choppa that did chop, what is it good for? who gets to use it if not the emperor himself?

It has to be a fatal amount, they can't be Japanese or an Indo tribe from Japan. Also, they must be legitimate kings, tyrants and despots don't count. Well loved by their people.

>These shitbloods are all equally low before us.
Dis.

In El Paso I got me $250 for it.

youtube.com/watch?v=QMI1uQBHUpA

did you get the in-scrolled dragon head handle?

you can reuse the blood. Most of the kings were killed centuries ago.

I really really like this post.

...

>you reuse the blood

have you ever cooked blood user? because like eggs, once the heat is in, it ain't no liquid anymore

youtube.com/watch?v=XIxVxt-oWxc

>your party is a team of the Emperor's finest, sent out to fulfill the final requirement of the blade, for it be used by all future generations of the imperial lineage

Feel free to spam it everywhere Katanas are pointlessly being praised or discussed. It's my attempt at copypasta silliness.

>trying to start a copypasta

I am.

That's really gay. Forced memes don't catch on. You killed a thread for this.

I wouldn't put copypasta in on par with an organic meme. Copypasta is more about shitty spam that ends up where is has no business being and pissing people off and for thread killing. I'm intentionally targeting Katana threads.

>Copypasta is never targeted
>This isn't just going to be irritating if it ever catches on
>We don't already have a copypasta targeting katana threads
Turn off your computer.

>The virgin Katana
>The chad Coup Stick

>Turn off your computer.
No.