Some "heroes" have angered Hades

>Some "heroes" have angered Hades.

What could an angry Hades do?

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Steal their waifus, for starters.

On that note, you have to be a pretty big jerk even by Classical Greek standards to make based Hades personally hate you.

When they die they get put in a shit afterlife

Along with being the god that looked over the dead, Hades also had dominion over the literal underworld (caves, tunnels, mines, etc.) and the wealth found within (gems and precious metals). While controlling the underworld is pretty niche—stuff like earthquakes is the realm of Poseidon since he had dominion over the surface world, and we can assume Hades’s control ends where Poseidon’s begins—having the god of wealth and riches pissed off at you seems pretty terrible.

Wealth ALWAYS finds a way to escape. Financial windfall? Expensive accident costs everything you just made. Trying to scrimp and save over the years? Your hidden cache disappears one day—you hid it in the ground, so Hades took it back. Got a pretty gemstone? Your pouch has an unnoticed hole in it.

You never find caves. If you’re searching for impromptu shelter or hunting bandits that reside in caves, you’re out of luck. If you do manage to get inside one, you get so turned around and hopelessly lost that you wander back outside. If you’ve REALLY pissed him off, then getting so lost you starve to death isn’t out if the question, nor are cave-ins and collapsing tunnels.

Stop doing his job.

>On that note, you have to be a pretty big jerk even by Classical Greek standards to make based Hades personally hate you.

This.
He didn't even get pissed at the guy who tried to steal his wife away.
All he did was have him permanently stuck to a bench.

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Well he has a legion of spirits with any number of skill sets he can sick on them.

He’d probably be reasonable and ask for an explanation/recompense. He’d even let you off with a warning if you had good enough reasons.
That’s unless you did something indefensible, in which case he’d royally fuck over your finances, let you struggle as a pauper for a few years, then bury you alive and make sure the afterlife you got was particularly unpleasant. Just hope to hell that Zeus didn’t hear about it and decide it was an insult to the Gods as a whole

>All he did was have him permanently stuck to a bench.
With vipers biting him for centuries.

Actually, it was two dudes, who were both trying to waifu goddesses. The wingman was freed by some hero venturing down there for some reason or another, and when they were about to set the other one free, there was an earthquake (Hades' displeasure) so they noped out of there, leaving the dude to his chair of vipers.

>Hades rules the dead
>Hades rules the secret dosh
>Hades got the cutest waifu
Shit man I gotta change religions.

By all standards of the mythology, a pretty average punishment from a god. However, Hades only doled that out for the massive insult and hubris it takes to think you can steal the Lord of the Dead's waifu. Most of the other gods dealt out equally brutal punishments for much less.

Hades was cold and probably autistic but he wasn't nearly as spiteful as the rest.

Try to make hercules mortal and fail miserably as disney makes him look like retarded while making zeus seem like an upstanding gentleman.

I give that gross departure from the actual characterization a pass because of just how much fun James Woods' voice work was.

Can Hades control actual fortune? I thought Tyche was the goddess of luck, and Hermes is the god of merchants and trade, among other things.

I think Hades can make it impossible to acquire any riches from the earth but he doesn't control them after they have left his domain.

For adventurers not being able to find any riches from the dungeons might be a devastating blow.

Was it him or Zeus that dealt with the guy who chained up Thanatos?
I know something pretty nasty happened to him

Sisyphus has to push a rock up a hill every day and then it rolls down again. Just that. Every day forever.

It was Hermes that dragged him to the underworld when the rest of them got sick of him evading, eluding or overpowering Thanatos.

I think it was Zeus who came up with the eternal rock pushing as punishment for the ultimate sin; making Zeus look bad.

Hades didn't have much to do with the punishment as Sisyphus and his rock was in Tartarus rather than the realm of Hades.

Fuck Hades, the "heroes" have pissed off Hades, goddess of witchcraft, ghosts, and the crossroads. She has sent her lampads to fuck them up.

How fucked are they?

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I mean Hekate.

Fucking autocorrect.

>Players always choose the the wrong turn in a three way crossroad
>Every dog attacks on sight

Sounds ass.

Counter question: What do you get if you get on Hades' good side?

Dude would let your wife leave if you sing well enough and just fucking trust him holy shit is that too much to ask you fucking ungrateful son of a bitch

Endless supply of spare change from the ground.

Hades was always my favorite. I picked him in AoM every time I could.

This. Hades did his job, held himself to actual standards and was an overall pretty decent deity by the (admittedly almost non existent standards) standards of Olympus.

Out of the not shit gods there was Hades, Hermes, Prometheus, Asclepius (Zeus killed him because he made him look bad) and on a good day Hephaestus.

The rest tended to be various flavours of shit.

Apollo was a vengeful prick but acted very benevolently if you didn't cross him.

>Asclepius
He was just a guy, wasn't he?

And I think Prometheus was a titan.

Yeah, I gotta agree with you there. Even though they hideously mutated the source material, that movie was too much fun not to enjoy. Now, the Percy Jackson movies on the other hand...

Asclepius had healing temples and shrines, so he had some powers.

Dude killed the satyr Marsias because king Midas said he was a better musician. Marsias didn't say anything, mind you, but he still got flayed alive.

Asclepius was a demi-god son of Appolo

The Titans were a gods, they just weren't Olympian gods.

You can't blame him for the vipers.
Vipers happen.

Could I pet his dog?

My nigga!

Nobody is going to stop you.

My favorite was Gaia. I picked Oceanus in classical age, for naiads, then Theia in heroic age for Dryads, then Hekate in the Mythic age for the Lampades.

I guess you could say I'm a...
>*puts on sunglasses*
Nymphomaniac

wasnt helios okay?

Wasn't Helios the guy who killed the last of Odysseus' crewmates after they ate his cattle? Granted, they committed sacrilege, but they were literally starving to death.

Cerberus is fluffy and nice.

They killed immortal cattle.

>They killed immortal cattle.
Obviously they weren't that immortal then.

Titans are just the previous generation of gods though

He should have got a refund then.
Or was it to cover up his shoddy craftsmanship?

immortal, not invincible

You underestimate how dickish and petty greek gods were about their shit. Fuck refunds, they'd have to go on an epic, impossible adventure covering several books while the deity in question was continually shitting on them just to get them not to kill them horribly and/or sentence them to an eternal punishment. Also i'm fairly sure they were immortal as in "not dying of old age" kind of immortal.

fuckin hell...
>Hades, like hes the god of the Underworld
>So thats like... the devil yeah?
>Cool, thats cool, do that...
>Lots of fire, screaming, thats the greek underworld!

Question: How would you handle a Mafioso Bacchus (Dyonisus) in a Super's setting?
I realy hope my players aren't reading this

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>Players always choose the the wrong turn in a three way crossroad

If you think about it, that's literally death sentence. What with the things typical PCs usualy deal with and the shit they tend to do.

Dionysus could drive people insane, so maybe he could poison people with hallucinogenic drugs?

He also had a harem of crazy drunk women who could tear people to shreds with their bare hands.

On top of what's already been said?

He goes to Elysium, walks up to any one of the heroes who owe him for letting them live out their eternity there, and says "I need you to pimpslap a motherfucker for me."

Being Greek heroes, and therefore loyal to their debts and/or fight-obsessed muscleheads, they promptly proceed to wreck shit.

Wait. They're going to end up before his throne in a few decades anyway.

I mean, I'm willing to forgive Athena because of that time she turned Diomedes' shield into a flamethrower.

Not if they doom themselves into some hell or soulcube or matrix which is more than likely with adventurers.

>not shit gods
>Prometheus
He was a Titan, but I accept the point you mean to make.

Titans were the previous generation of gods, like Protogenoi before them.

Mate, athena was a fucking cunt
>Be Athena
>Hear how some princess is talking shit about how she's better than me at weaving
>what.mural
>Appear before her and challenge her to a duel
>She's actually better than i am
>Not only that but her tapestry says how much of an ass can olympians be
>hubris.amphora
>Turn her into a spider so she can weave for all eternity since she liked it so much
I mean fair enough, weaving a tapestry talking smack about the gods (even if said tapestry was right) in front of an olympian is a retarded move, but still.
Also let us not forget
>Be priestess of athena
>Poseidon fancies me, but i turn down his advances
>He rapes me anyway
>Athena hears about it
>Thankgoddess.statue
>Gets mad at me instead of her uncle
>What
>Turns me into a monster for desecrating her temple
>I am a snek

snek was best girl, fuck you Perseus!

Gets a pass for cougar Rosario Dawson in a corset.

I would totally want to be a spider for eternity. I would bite people whom I didnt like and spin beautiful webs which I would proceed to sell for gold. Sounds fuckin' baller.

Hestia is best girl.

Wait.

Yeah, Hades is known as a pretty cold temper. Not a temper you want to upset because his reach and memory are both long and his patience very great, but not a fast starter.

He can muddle your luck with any sort of earthwork. He can also grant you fortune in terms of just actually giving you precious metal/gemstones because yknow, he has them all.
Presumably he could even turn whatever gold and gems you have to useless rock.

Didn't the Greeks have a shit afterlife?

>makes him look like retarded
Hades is everyones favorite and the most memorable character from that movie, though.

Hades is the name of the afterlife as a whole, and Hades had control over all of it. Its split into Tartarus and Eylsium (or The Elysian Fields). Tartarus is the shit afterlife, Elysian Fields is super nice afterlife where all your friends and family wait for you. There's some special cases of extra punishment dished out to some mythical dudes but other than that it's pretty much just another thing Christians co-opted.

Sure, but he's very friendly, and very big.

Also his name translates to basically "Spot" , further emphasising Hades's bro-tierness

He's a little bland in the books imho, but at least he's not the shitshow that that film is.
I mean, the films are so bad the author disowns them.

Super!Eliot Ness + the Untouchables

Tartarus is the extra-shit afterlife. The normal shit afterlife is the Asphodel Fields.

This is actually the best answer in the thread. None of this shit about controlling the dead or any of that, just asking a bro to smack the asshole who messed with him.

I think Athena was just really jealous. I mean, she was one of the goddesses fighting for the apple that started the Trojan war too. Basically, all you have to do to avoid her shitlist is not be an attractive woman. Then again, attractive women almost always lose in Greek myths. Right, Hera?

Wait until they die, then refuse them entry to the Underworld. They have to wander the world as restless spirits until Armageddon.

Tarturus was only for super pricks. Elysian Fields were only for amazing ass war heros. Everyone else just kind of bummed around never feeling satisfaction from anything ever again

Except yummy yummy blood from sacrifices, as in the Odyssey.

Ah, dammit, i was about to nitpick when i saw the almost always. You know what? Screw it i'll do it anyway
>Ackshually, Helen of Troy got scot-free despite the shit she pulled

Wait patiently for them to come to him, as all inevitably do. Then give them a Noogie.

So he waits and either gets to deal with them personally, or they screw up and face something worse than what he'd do to them.

Seems win/win for Hades.

Well admittingly no one's gonna rape Medusa again....
Athena is the master of double-edged swords...
>be ruler of Athens
>kind if a dick, so no one likes me
>prays to Athena to be closer to the earth
>I'm part snek
>people pity me now.

But enough about Hades. Who had the nicest rack among the Greek goddesses: Hera, Athena, or Aphrodite?

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What about Demeter, harvest goddess and mother-in-law to hades? I don't recall her being a shitty god, maybe just a neutral one.

Probs aphrodite.

I'm surprised no one talked about Eris when mentioning dickish gods. I mean, the war of troy happened because she threw a fit after not being invited to a wedding.

To be fair, it's pretty rude that they didn't send her an invite.

This is probably off-topic but is Elspeth Erebo's waifu or daughteru, is she going to be the perseperone stand-in in theros
I ain't falling for that shit...

Go to bed, Eris

I'd make him my bitch.

Reminds me of the AD&D campaign we took out Odin, Thor and Fenris in one fight.

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Nigga you don't invite chaos to your wedding.

wrong snek, buddy, back to homer

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Eris being an awful vindictive troublemaker is a given and is something even most normies understand.

Norse Pantheon are complete casuals compared to the Olympians.

Athena was born when someone literally smashed Zeus's head open and he was completely fine.

>you have to be a pretty big jerk even by Classical Greek standards to make based Hades personally hate you.
He shit in his coffee on an early Monday morning. And it was one of those beer and Taco Bell shits that splattered all over Hade's waffles and bacon.

Were the vipers cute?

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>58750948

your foolishness is on par with the guys that carried a giant wooden horse into their city.

Seriously how can people still fall for this

She invented winter because she disapproved of her daughter's choice in husband.

The reasoning being that if all the humans die of frostbite there will be nobody left to tell Zeus how great he is so Zeus better bring their daughter back.

Nope. Not falling for that one.

>Be Priam
>Guys who've been trying to break into my city for ten years suddenly disappear
>Giant wooden horse suddenly on front of my gates
>Obviously a gift
>Bring giant wooden horse with no obvious use inside
>I think it just coughed

Reminder the Romans fancied themselves descendants of these guys.

They weren't the only ones, either. How do you think Britain got its name?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brutus_of_Troy

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>Athena is the master of double-edged swords...
that's simply called being a fucking cunt where I come from