Calorie Bombs

Let's post our favorite calorie bombs.

Costco muffins are pretty good.

>~690 calories per muffin.

Other urls found in this thread:

tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=268344545
independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/starbucks-new-frappuccinos-contain-as-much-sugar-as-a-litre-of-coke-10310044.html
youtube.com/watch?v=lWONU2h14Ck
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

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Good old fashioned Trail Mix. Peanuts, cashews,chilli-coated sunflower seeds if you can find them, some raisins, it's damn good. You can swap it out for essentially anything you want. Almonds, cashews, dried banana chips and chocolate chips are amazing too. I can go through a whole bag of banana chips without realising.

>Almonds
Sometimes I get a can of pic related to snack on at work. TFW you realize there are over 1,000 calories in that can.

I know the feeling. These are my achille's heel-
tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=268344545

There's a Cinnabon near my apartment and god help me it's my one weakness.

Cinnabon looks amazing. Are cinnamon buns easy to make at home? In northern England there's no way to buy anything like that, just the flatter "cinnamon whirls" that don't taste anywhere near as good.

God damn, 1,080 calories for this fucker.

Do most people eat it one sitting or eat a fraction then save the rest for later?

this is a regular cinnamon roll at cinnabon?

costco muffins never cease to amaze me by giving me diarrhea. Best way to empty my bowels

yeah people eat those in 1 sitting, this is america

That doesn't make sense

It's Cinnabon's caramel pecanbon.

I was at costco the other day cause one of you fuckers was recommending their pizzas (not great, not bad). Saw a box of a half dozen of these for sale. Didn't know if I could finish that many before they went stale, but they looked pretty good so I grabbed them.

Half an hour of waiting in a stupid long line, I get to the checkout and the guy tells me I needed to get two of the individually wrapped containers, because he can only sell them to me a dozen at a time. Nevermind they're wrapped in half dozen units.

Fuck you guys, fuck Costco. REE.

>finish that many before they went stale

I bought a dozen and froze them once I got home.

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NO GET BACK IM ON A FUCKING DIET

>used to live 8 blocks away from this 100 years old bakery and restaurant
>those fucking pastrys especially the glazed apple and custard oneswith tiny almond bits, so buttery and delicious
pretty much everything they made was absolutely delicious, i remember going to the restaurant on birthdays and the bread alone, they bringed like 8 different types all exotic that you couldnt find anywhere else

Cinnamon buns aren't too hard to make really, maybe slightly more work than most breads. They're great, I haven't made em homemade in awhile.

>maybe slightly more work than most breads

I actually think it's easier to make than other breads. Maybe it's just because I've been making this kind of yeasty sweet dough for longer so I have the texture down better.

Starbucks frappucinos. Ugh, the guilt

It's so annoying that even healthy, roasted in the shell peanuts are so calorific.
I just opt for crisps (chips to the yanks) if I want something savoury, as they last longer. A small pack of peanuts can have as many calories as a big pack of crisps, so I just go with that, the odd time.

I've never understood why people have such big desserts.

I like something sweet, but small, after a meal, to round it off. A small chocolate mousse or a couple of biscuits (cookies) with some Earl Grey tea.

Do people just have cinnabon as their lunch? Would they eat something savory beforehand?

I could never eat something sugary on an empty stomach. The idea is repulsive to me.

Sorry about your diabetes.

Stop getting them, now.

independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/starbucks-new-frappuccinos-contain-as-much-sugar-as-a-litre-of-coke-10310044.html

I really hope to find this some day.

It's not an every day thing. It's like a big Sunday brunch, except even more occasional.

pretty much

when I'm breaking my keto I'll have about 1000 calories in stuffed waffles for brunch.

>Do people just have cinnabon as their lunch?

Never had cinnabon myself, but as for cinnamon rolls I have always considered them a breakfast thing. A breakfast of a couple of cinnamon rolls and some milk. So yeah, a meal, but regular cinnamon rolls are a lot smaller and it's not regular breakfast. I might have eaten them twice in the past year and a half.

Don't know the nutritional data but I wouldn't think it's that much worse than pancakes.

Pancakes don't have sugar, and other than the oil aren't too bad. If you eat a huge pile with syrup they're bad, but a little cinnamon sugar or lemon with english pancakes is tasty and ok to eat a few times a week. It's the same with french toast, some eat with meat and ketchup, others syrup or icing sugar.

>he eats pancakes without syrup in anything but a huge pile
what a fucking chump

Just typed Cinnabon into YouTube and found this.
It's like two robots talking.
Is this what corporatisation has done to American people?

Also, you can tell the Cinnabon representative doesn't fucking eat that shit.

youtube.com/watch?v=lWONU2h14Ck

I don't think anyone really watches CNN.

English pancakes are different, a pile of 7-8 will be no taller than two american pancakes. We normally roll them and put sugar/lemon juice on top, or something like nutella. They're a little more like crepes, so they're more versatile if you want to make them savoury. You can add spices and put bombay potatoes in the middle before rolling them which is amazing too. I like american/scotch pancakes but I prefer waffles to them, if you're going to have a thick doughy syrupy breakfast waffles have a nicer texture and hold the syrup in the little pockets.

Here is a pic for reference

oh you meant crepes

sweet cream + berries is the best filling.
I also like to fill stacks of waffles with that.

Nutella and chopped nuts in the center is great
American pancakes lose out in versatility, they're too fluffy to do anything with. Stick some fruit or bacon in them, use a different type of syrup, about it. Anything you put on top will just fall off.

You could easily put your bombay potatoes on top.

Yeah it's going to depend on the eaters preferences. I'm willing to bet that the average American eats them with a decent amount of syrup though and you can't forget the butter on top. Some people prefer fruit syrups to maple. Beyond syrup some people will load them up with fruit and Cool Whip. Some people use jam. A glass of milk also.

I can't stomach more than three pancakes myself, and I can eat a lot, but I'm sure there are people who can put away a lot more.

Googled it lik a champ
"Crepes are thinner and larger than an English pancake, they usually have richer ingredients including sugar and or cream and are only cooked on one side. English pancakes are made with plain flour (no rising agent), egg and milk. They are cooked on both sides, although the second side usually only takes 30 seconds or so."

I feel like I could crush about two hundred of these

I eat both english and american pancakes fairly frequently- most people don't make them quite as thin as that pic, they're thin and flexible but you can't see through them and if you bend them too much they'll break. I'd say one american pancake is around as filling as 3 english, but I can normally manage a couple more because I don't eat english pancakes drenched in maple/golden syrup

Oh Lord I used to eat 2 muffins warmed up in a toaster oven with a milkshake made with Kirkland vanilla ice cream whey protein and fresh fruits and milk for breakfast. Delicious 2k calorie breakfast for when I was a skinny fag trying to gain weight.

Just my input, American pancakes are great because they are thick enough to have things cooked inside of them to enhance flavor. I will make big thick pancakes with chocolate chips, a syrup swirl and cinnamon in them. Then just put some butter on top and you're good to go.

>gaining weight
>on carbs
Enjoy your mantitties bro

Beer. Specifically Imperial Stouts.

It's like a 300+ calorie chocolate/coffee boozeshake in a bottle.

>chocolate, syrup, cinnamon AND butter

Pick two. All 4 is complete overkill, and not in a tasty way.

Shit, really? I go through a lot of stouts and porters, didn't realise they were that bad. They can really add up.

more like pick all 4 because we live in a free country not a nanny state

I don't know if you use all 4 of them sparingly they all go together great for me.

I didn't say you couldn't eat it, you fucking mongoloid. You have the poor taste of a small child to be loading that much sugar for the sake of it. Don't you care about how it tastes?

butter and cinnamon don't have any sugar in them you mongoloid, and chocolate chips with syrup is pretty fucking normal

All four is pointless gluttony that will mask and ruin the flavour of each individual part. Butter and cinnamon is fine, syrup and butter is fine, everything together is a mess. It amuses me how so many Americans think they're free, and that freedom means stuffing their faces with as much shit as possible.

Not the guy you are arguing with, I am the one who posted the thing about making the pancakes. You seemed to get pretty offended by my choice in pancake fillings. Why do Europeans care so much what other people think taste good, its objective.

>it's objective

>it's objective

Too bad my blueberry muffins from costco went moldy in a few days....Chocolate ones still good tho.

You have weak genes

What the fuck?

If you're ever in London, there's a Cinnabon near Piccadilly Circus.

Plain Jasmine rice

You don't. Everything this company produces is an overpriced scam for fitness newcomers that tastes of formaldehyde. If you spread that "peanut butter" on a bagel, you'd literally regret not just having a plain bagel.

If you dig the wasabi flavor just get some wasabi peas. If you find the right brand it will be like an eight of the calorie content of almonds

This local biscuit chain makes the most delicious breakfast biscuits on earth, but I'd estimate they are around 800-1000 calories each.

My favorite is the shaved ham melt, which is a thick stack of shaved ham topped with melted cheese sauce.

I can usually pound down some food, but these motherfuckers have me struggling by the last bite.

Great-Value brand frozen cheeseburger. I don't know what they put in it that makes it different from other frozen patties, or even whole frozen cheeseburgers, but there's something that's addicting

Yeah, high ABV beers are dangerous that way. 2 10%+ beers is easily 600+ calories, but you'd never figure.

Rolling a pancake wtf

Beer in general is pretty much the ultimate calorie bomb. Goes down so easy. I gained like 30 pounds on it over a year, but eating's a pain in the ass so I lost it all in a few months after I stopped buying it. Still.

yeah, i do like wasabi peas too. i think i got into the almonds because i heard there were a lot of health benefits to eating almonds because of the "good fats" and antioxidants. i just need to work on portioning them out so i don't eat half a can without even thinking about it.

The fuck is that?

Like it's a frozen burger, bun and all and you microwave it all together?

How is the bun not a mushy ball of steamed goo?

How the hell is the center of the meat hot without utterly destroying the exterior ring?

They sell this by the box at my local Costco. It goes down real easy, can easily have 2 or more without thinking.

It's a frozen microwave burger. You microwave it in the wrapper.

Not that user but I'll admit I like them as well. I like the spicy chicken ones too.

Yeah. Bottom bun, patty, slice of cheese, top patty.
You only do it for 75~ seconds from frozen. They're stupid fucking hot when they come out so let them cool for like an hour, they retain heat well.

It tastes like vomit mixed with heavy amounts of salt.

their syrups are good

Meh we eat this shit all the time in my country, the shittiest restaurant serves them as a dessert with the cheapest menu.
Pretty much any 6 year old can make them

Did you get a hot pizza or the take and bake ones over with the meat? I find the take and bake to be really bland. The made-to-order ones are pretty good for the price, especially when it's gigantic and has all the toppings. Even better when you cram it in the oven when you get home and broil the top a little to crisp it up.

i loved this shit as a kid

Is it my nostalgia goggles or were they bigger?

Back in the 90's, 7 year old me could devour two in one sitting. I was skinny as fuck back then too.

>he was 7 years old in the 90s
>this counts as old to some people
I still haven't come to accept that children born in a year beginning with the numbers 1-9-8 can have valid adult opinions about anything

Post recipe links thanks

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DO NOT BUY THIS BRAND
literally all their shit taste like ass and vomit
not even kidding

Chocolate milk.

>young child
>road trip
>stop at rest stop, is a cinnabon
>never had it before, get one
>eat it
>ten minutes later, barf all over parking lot

Too much sugar. Fuck those things. I haven't had one since.

Most people eat it in one sitting as a side dish with something else.

>those ingredients

Me too. I can eat a thousand fast food hamburgers and my colon will not even blink, but the moment that even a single crumb of these "muffins" hit my system, I have liquid shits for a day.

Their pancake syrup is the only product of theirs that I recommend.

100cal/pretzel and I can eat the whole box in one sitting.

It's fat free, eat as many as you like

muh calories

Eating healthy calories is better than damn chips though

I work at Costco and shitheads like you piss me off all the time. It says two pax mix and match on the sign and the sticker. Either you have so much money you can run around buying shit all willy nilly or you need to learn how to read, you fucking dickhead.

I used to like pretzels, but then it dawned on me that I'm simply ingesting flour and salt. So imagining a big blob of flour in my gut is unappetizing, and can't possibly be healthy. Need fiber and other nutrients.

I'd be insulted if I didn't know that sadly, you were mostly right.