HOW TO BURGER

Its not even caste island

Why so slow OP?

okay here we go boys rapid fire

step 5:
>smash garlic into burger (not too tight though)

Step 6:
>Salt and pepper opposite side

step 6:

Wa la

Step 7:
>Seasoned side down first

If you don't hear it sizzle, it's a no dizzle!
Searing is absolutely key for burgers. That and not flipping it 18 times.

Make sure not to oversalt the garlic side, because remember, we used salt to crush the garlic before we spread it on the patty!

...

Isnt that garlic going to burn when you sear that side?

Some worthless asshole bought the wrong buns. These will do.

Adding breadcrubs and eggs to a burger is supposed to be a British thing?

I always just saw it as not being a pleb.

>meat
>egg
>breadcrumb
>onion
>garlic
>worcestershire

What does worcestershire tatse like?

Adding egg/breadcrumb makes it a meatloaf patty and is never needed for a burger.

Just because that is how McDonalds does it doesn't make it right.

It will definitely get brown but it won't burn. The trick is to smash it in the meat just enough so it's not all in direct contact with the pan.

Anyway, time to flip! Well, maybe we could have done a little better, but that's a good enough sear I think. What do you think boys? Remember, when you flip it, turn the heat down by about half! That also helps with not burning the garlic!

Why don't you just mix the garlic it into the meat?

It's not needed! Once you see the final product, you'll agree! And once you try it, you'll notice the flavor of the meat is more apparent and it's also a lot juicier, as the breadcrumbs won't soak it all up and swell your burger into a big spongy meatloaf patty.

Well, our burger is almost done. So lets get our bun in the oven, just lightly toasted. Some people do this in the pan with butter. Personally I dislike that method as your hands get all greasy when you eat the burger.

That's a nice looking oven you colossal gimp.

Because I don't like to pack the patty too tight. If you form it gently it makes it a bit less chewy and a little more tender. That's another reason I don't like when people mix breadcrumbs and egg in there! They pack the meat do densely that you can actually tell when you bite into it. It's a textural thing. Honestly though, as long as you don't put the breadcrumbs in there, it probably won't make TOO much of a difference texturally. I don't see the point though, as I've never burned my garlic.

Well guys let's top it with some cheese and turn the burner off. Today I have uh...colby and monterey jack. whatever. good enough for me.

3/10
You tried I guess.

Hey thanks man! I fucked your mom!

Let's cover it with foil so the cheese melts and move it to the back burner where it will continue cooking a bit.

Mm, gooey!

Yes but you will also need to add activated almonds

Toppings? Fuck that shit I'm hungry, how about some mustard.

Stay tuned for the money shot, hopefully.

>Today I have uh...colby and monterey jack. whatever. good enough for me.
>I have uh...
>uh...

Gayfag blog of the day, acting like you're thinking out loud.

Wa-la!

Looks a little less pink in the photo, but it's just the way papa likes it.

This has been the one and only episode of HOW TO BURGER, starring Le Burger Man

Now you don't have an excuse to fuck your next burger up!

>Wa-la!

It's "voila", you fucking idiot

Looks delicious, Le Burger Man!
Will there be another episode? A fried chicken fillet sandwich, perhaps?

Babbys first day on Veeky Forums?

welcome to Veeky Forums, maybe /pol/ is a bit more to your speed

I could do that. The other day I made some breaded and fried pork cutlets that were awesome. Maybe I'll use that method along with a nice homemade sauce.

Sounds good, I look forward to it.

Did ur mum get the bad buns again? Fuckin cunt REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Shouldn't the mustard be put on the other side and not mixed with the cheese?

>That and not flipping it 18 times.
Old wive's tale. Constant flipping cooks faster and more evenly.

It's not a massive difference, so don't flip a bunch if you don't want to, but the idea that constant flipping is detrimental is a myth easily shown to be with science.

Your "hamburger" is garbage. And also meatloaf.

What a boring burger m8. If this is supposed to be the quintessential amerilard burger done right then ill stick to doing it wrong.

Actually my aunt! I'm a caretaker for a couple family members here but sometimes my aunt pitches in to help and goes shopping for us.

That's a weird question.

Old wives tale or not I still want a good sear, and your not arguing anything I said anyway. The reason a lot of people add breadcrumbs and eggs is to bind everything together so it doesn't fall apart. But it only falls apart if you don't have a decent sear and if you move it around too much. Kinda like a fried egg. Imagine you try to flip it a bunch of times before the other side is done, you're likely to break the yolk. You flip a burger too much, you're a lot more likely to tear it up. Just be patient. I only turned mine three times and it's just the way I like it. It makes sense that it would cook more evenly like you said, but there's no need for it and I like my browning, which I can't imagine you'd get by flipping it over and over.

I mean, the reality of it is my way tastes better than your way, which I assume is the breadcrumbs and eggs nonsense. You can season it your own way, add whatever toppings you want, make your own sauce, etc. You can make it as complicated as you want, but like I said, if you fuck with the meat too much, it won't taste as good. It's as simple as that. It doesn't even have to do 'tradition.' It just is the way it is. If you want to make your hamburger patty a lot more dense and dryer than mine, that's fine. But just because mine is simpler and 150% less messy doesn't mean it won't taste better.

Regular (once or twice a minute) flipping does not affect sear at all. Neither enhances nor mitigates, it will sear the same.

And regular flipping also doesn't cause it to fall apart, unless there's something wrong with your meat, or you're violent with it or something.

Also, you don't have to tell me to imagine anything, because I've cooked plenty enough burgers that I know exactly what happens.

Not only is correct, but if you're looking for a good sear, you missed an important part of it: smashing.

It has to be done very early in the process (first 30 seconds, I believe, I'll look it up), but pushing the meat against the griddle gives it more even browning, and if done early enough, does not cost you juices.

>Burnt garlic
>Seasoning on only one side
>Pre shredded cheese
>Weak toast on the bun
>Sauce on the top
>Well done
>No produce in sight

You really showed those euros how to make the perfect burger. Maybe next time we could see you microwave a hot dog and eat on a folded over slice of wonder bread with ketchup.

>garlic wasn't burnt
>both sides were seasoned, as shown in pictures and discussed in the text
>I'm sorry the cheese was shredded, what a travesty
>I admit to the shitty bun, again discussed in text
>I'm sorry you don't like mustard
>the only toppings available to me were grape tomatoes or romaine lettuce

And honestly I just don't usually like a bunch of toppings on my burger unless I'm craving it. I did have a salad with it, so there was produce, I just didn't show it. Toppings are just a matter of choice anyway. Obviously you can put whatever you want on it. The focus was on the meat.

Again I still don't know what your arguing with. You're telling me just to turn it more so it cooks evenly. If I'm wrong about the searing than I'm wrong. Like I said, I'll try it. Other than that we are essentially making the same point, breadcrumbs and eggs are unnecessary.

You're right. I actually forgot to do this or even mention it. I definitely do this almost every time though unless I forget. If anyone else is reading this it's also good to do this because you're burger will shrink a bit, so you might end up with a patty much smaller than your bun, which sucks. But yeah, good catch. My fault.

you a whore i'd eat that burger

I approve of this thread thanks op!

Thanks bruh.

No problem. I did mess up, but it was still a good burger! I'll do better next time, when I'll apparently be making some kind of fried chicken sammich.

>That's a weird question.

How? You've left one side of the burger without anything and also made a mustardy cheese.

You're supposed to put lettise or condiment on bottom bun so that grease doesnt sink

Also next time make a sauce with mayo, mustard, white wine vinegar, sweet relish, garlic powder, paprika, and cilantro

You say odd shit to people man

Everyone point and laugh at the slav.

Bland fucking meat.
Truly WALA

>HOW TO BURGER
more like how to fuck up burger

2/10

Lol true. Sounds like a redditor. Also Americans with their coloured cheese wtf

I mean it's got crushed garlic, salt and pepper. What else do you want me to do to it? It was definitely not bland at all, I don't know what to tell you.

Oh cry me a fuckin' river. Nothing wrong with that cheese by the way, it was just pre-shredded because my aunt got it for something she was making. It's gotta be used.

Again, the cheese, mustard, are all your call. Even the garlic is. There is no recipe other than showing you that you don't have to use a bunch of shitty additives to make a burger, and in fact it's better if you don't.

>Again, the cheese, mustard, are all your call.
and toppings*

Yeah, enjoy your irrelevant observations.

>Again I still don't know what your arguing with.
You said, "not flipping 18 times. . . is absolutely key." All I was doing was correcting you on that, it's not absolutely key.

>mustardy cheese
>bad thing

Pick one.

The order of ingredients on a sandwich -- humbergers included -- is when you what you want to touch your taste buds first. In the case of a hamburger, other than the bread used to hold it, the beef is ABSOLUTELY what is supposed to hit your palate first. The only exception is a light (flavor wise) condiment like maybe mayo.

OP is right on this one, both in what he did, and that your question is weird.

>You're supposed to put lettise or condiment on bottom bun so that grease doesnt sink

No, you're supposed to let the burger rest before putting on the bun, because as beef cools, the juices retract back in to the meat and stay there, creating more flavor and less mess. Also do this for steaks. Not resting your burger or steak is one of the dumbest things a cook can do, because resting is a really fucking painless way to improve the final product.

Also, you're supposed to use bread that will stand up to the juice.

Also, lettise isn't a thing.

Okay, fair enough.

I still maintain that flipping it over and over is more likely to destroy your burger, and that that's why people starting adding binders. But I'm not a fucking bigfoot monkey and I'm capable of flipping a burger without that happening, so maybe I'll try turning it a few more times my next burger and see if it works as well for me as it does for you.

Yeah I didn't even bother responding to that.

>I want pools of hamburger grease on my lettuce and tomato
The fuck

LOL

I can promise you I have never destroyed a burger by flipping.

NOW, I have only been constant-flipping for a few years since I have been shown the light. I was a one-flipper for a much larger sample size of non-destruction. But still.

I mean I haven't either to be honest. I just cannot think of another reason everyone started adding those things to their burger? That's the only logical reason I came up with. I don't even know where or when it started, I just know there's a ton of people who do it for some reason. Could definitely be wrong though. Maybe it's just as simple as one important guy doing it thinking it was clever and so people just figured it was the right way.

What even is this jew salt Americans use? How can salt even be un-kosher?

Is tastes like Worcestershire sauce. It just adds a savoury element to food. It is an anchovy based liquid so kind of like fish sauce but not fish sauce.

Lel

You should google that user.

The reason it's different from regular table salt is the...I don't know what to call it...texure? shape? of the salt grains. They're coarse and flaky grains of salt rather than super fine powdery grains.

So you haven't added anything to these buns? They look pretty yellow but you said you were anti-butter for greasy finger reasons.

Tyrone.

>What even is this jew salt Americans use?

It's salt in large flakes.

>>How can salt even be un-kosher?

It's called "Kosher" salt because it's used in the Koshering process. Verb, not noun. Koshering is the practice of using salt to draw out blood and fluids when curing meat per Jewish custom.

Most people use it simply because the flaky shape helps it stick to food better than square crystals.

No like I said these were admittedly shitty store-bought buns. It could have been worse, it turned out to actually be dense enough to hold up to the juices without getting soggy which was nice and I didn't expect that.

But yeah other than lightly toasting it there was no effort put into the bun on my part. I was just here to talk about the meat, mostly.

That bottom bun will fucking disintegrate as soon as you pick it up, look how soaked with grease it is.

I swear on my life it actually wasn't soggy or wet on the bottom at all. I really expected it to be the shittiest bun I've ever had but it was at least acceptable. Like I said, these are not the buns I usually get, but they stood up to the burger fine. They didn't taste like anything, but they didn't turn into a wet soggy mess.

m8 your burger looks shit and you can't make them for shit

who the fuck puts a burnt garlic crust on their burger

I think people are just idiots, to be honest. And they get hung up on the rules of cooking and cannot stand to find out something they've done in a recipe is unnecessary or suboptimal.

>makes it a meatloaf patty
can we stop it with this "preparation I don't like is completely different food" meme
it makes it shit but it doesn't make it different
just because some retarded hick fucks call ground beef "hamburger" or whatever your stupid reasoning

...

This fucker just put kraft singles and the most pathetic looking onions I've ever seen on a wagyu beef burger. Fuck

THOSE ARE ONIONS RIGHT? I CAN'T REALLY TELL.

Your passion has inspired me to make burgers tomorrow night. Would you reccomend mixing other ground meat into the beef?

All that seems more like a recipe for meatloaf.

You've been visited by the Gambare Girl of Burger Appreciation. You can make dank burgers like OP but only if you post 'Make America tasty again.'

is that pre-ground/mechanically separated? if so, opinion utterly discarded into a wastebasket that exists in a trivial, purposeless dimension that is prone to collapsing at any moment due to sheer meaninglessness

>reason for adding crap to burger

I'll be the geezer and come in to answer this.

Meat was expensive.
During the wars, meat was also rationed.

You added bread to the meat to make it go further, stale bread was cheap and you could get twice as many servings if you tossed it in for your burgers or meatloaf.

But the bread was bland and dry, so you added onions to bring some flavor and juice back in. Extra seasoning mixed in helped as well.

But then the mess just fell apart while cooking, so you added an egg as a binder.

The only thing in there that was a binder is the egg, the rest was referred to as stretchers, lots of things got used to stretch beef out to feed everyone. Old saltines, rice, even oatmeal.

Nowadays most folks don't have to do that anymore, but they grew up watching their mothers and grandmothers make every penny count and I guess it just kinda stuck.

>You have mustard and cheese on the top and spices on the bottom so the flavors are not properly distributed

Have you ever eaten a burger mate? Do you think they are eaten top to bottom instead of from the side?

All salt is kosher, but not all salt is kosher salt. Its about the size of the grains as said.

>inb4 bacon infused salt

underrated

>Adding salt to the burger before cooking
this is a terrible way to do it, it starts to break the meat down

Salt should only be added the second before you fry it.

Right salted before hand like you did, left not

Yeah, that totally explains the difference between the two. No one should ever salt meat before cooking it.

that's what the purpose of the image is, it really does make a big difference with ground meats