Does Veeky Forums have any recipes that a normal non-faggot male could follow...

You make me fucking sick get off my board

Quesadillas

Extremely simple carbonara:
Cook spaghetti while you fry bacon cut into half-inch slices
When the pasta is almost done, throw some chopped garlic into the pan with the bacon. Turn down the heat.
Drain the water from the pasta when done, and put the pasta into the pan with the bacon.
Crack an egg onto everything and take the pan off the stove while you mix everything around.
Salt and pepper to taste, then serve (parmesan on top if you have it).

Have fun fucking this shitty recipe up, and don't forget to eat your veggies.

>Has basic life skills
>"lol what a faggot"

You should at least get a toaster oven in that case, user. They're useful.

Peanut butter
Jelly
Bread

Put peanut butter on one slice of bread
Put jelly on another slice of bread.
Put both slices together with peanut butter and jelly in the middle.

Eat.

I have a recipe for even simpler 'nara

W A L A
A
L
A

Oh look, OP is a nu-male who prides himself on not being able to follow basic god damn instructions.

Please die

instructions not clear dick in ceiling fan

>wojak and pepe
>non-faggot male

yeh right

tip: make sure everything is still very hot when the egg goes in, not only is raw egg potentially dangerous to eat, it is also just kinda gross. you want it just cooked enough.

1. Buy a phone
2. Call a pizza place
3. Order a pizza
4. When the pizza arrives, pay the delivery man (plus tip, of course)
5. enjoy

Wa-la! I hope this is not too complicated a recipe for you to follow. Let me know if you have any questions.

no, nu males pretend to love cooking because it's "cultured" yet they can't make anything and just end up eating out at hipster restauraunts, OP is a conservative male who is incredibly insecure with his masculinity and is surely hiding latent homosexuality.

This. Nu-males all think they can cook and are totally willing to do so for their girlfriend/wife (because, I mean, she'll want a nice meal when she comes home from work), but can't cook for shit because they're manchildren who never learned basic life skills.

poutine
>fries
deepfry or bake that shit
>cheese
use singles, idgaf
>gravy
nuke it in glass or plastic, whatever. dump it on. youre done

sandwich/ burger/ hotdog
>bread
>meat
>whatever

purple drank
>water
fill a jug
>sugar
add extra, fuck diabetes
>purple
koolaid or what ever that new fancy shit is. its good enough for space men

>ramen
-ramen package
-meat
-vegetable
>KD and bacon
-KD
-sliced and fried bacon
>sandwich and soup
-bread
-meat
-vegetable
-cheese (optional)
-condiment (mustard is fav)
-canned soup

Get the following op:
Your dick
Your hand
Your mouth
Step 1: jerk till you cum
Step 2: catch the cum with your hands
Step 3: eat your nutrious cum and enjoy
No need to thank me op, i'm always happy to share one of my life hacks with you.

what is going on in this picture

You're not a "non faggot male". You're a manchild.

I think you'll like microwave tendies best. Maybe you could spice it up and have hot pockets once in a while.

looks like some obscure construction meme, I think pepe used the mobile drill on an underground cable line.

Complete and utter faggotry.

>VOILA
It's WALA you dumbass

>can't even survive without a woman
what a betalord

tip: make sure everything is still very hot when the egg goes in.

Wait are we supposed to be trolling op?? This results in pasta with scrambled eggs, not carbonara. Also where the FUCK is the parmesan in the other recipie

Learn how to make some basic Italian homecooking

youtube.com/watch?v=c7Md4YR75qU
youtube.com/watch?v=zVbkC6eMNtA

Hamburger helper works wonders my man, cooking noodles is piss easy and with some growned beef you can cook in a pan *Spray it first and sprinkle little random spices you like or just fucking salt/pepper*, drain the doodles and mix the two together.

Ither that or just get some tuna to mix with some cellury to cut up and mayo for some sandwitches. id plan ahead with that and keep the rest in baggies your intent of using the next day so it dosent go bad.

There are tons of shit online to make a basic meal without being a class A-faggot cheif straight from GR's kitchen, even a lazy top-raman left over eating faggot like me can do it.

SHIT I also frogot the best fucking thing in the world for lazy cookers and that is 'GET A FUCKING CROCKPOT' I cannot stress this shit enough, crockpots are fucking great for just tossing afew basic items in it, setting it at a low setting then coming home/after an hour or so if you want for insta-fucking vittles. Just stick a heat/water resistant waifu on the side of it and fucking marry the thing.