Yeah I'll just have a water, please

>Charging for water
And in what backwoods shithole have you been where they charge for water exactly?

I've heard people say this about the tip. I don't understand.

Laos

No where except the "deluxe" waters like OP.
But this guy has for some reason

>I don't understand.
The reason for this is because you are not smart.

t. America

You fouled that up. The correct phraseology is, "AMERICA! FUCK YEAH!"

America is the only place where it's frowned upon to have a drink at lunch.

Then you proceed to scoff down a 4000 calorie meal with 400g of fat and salt.

Balderdash.

When I was in the U.S. Army, we were allotted two beers during lunch. If stick-up-their-ass feds can accept that then there must be widespread acceptance.

this.

Oh how I miss being a dumb teenager like you.

I don't like soda and I'm allergic to fruit/juice. I like using alcohol on special occasions, going out to lunch isn't a big deal. I guess milk would be okay if you went out for breakfast. I'm not drinking caffeinated beverages if I don't want caffeine.

I actually like Malta soda though, but only some Hispanic restaurants serve it.

>allergic to fruit
literally what

water with lime and please

Either that or an unsweetened tea.

Sometimes I'll have a cocktail. I'll pass on soda & beers though, thanks!

I get a rash on my face after having fruit

Someone is poisoning your fruit. Remove yourself from social contact.

Well, if they brewed better tea, I'd order it unsweetened, but water is usually the better option. It's usually fresher, too, since at least I know it's coming straight from the tap. There's not much turnover for unsweetened tea here in the south, where one carafe is likely to last them all day.

yur still gonna get a 2 dollar tip so chill the fuck out stop shillin

>two dollar tip

Another date night at the roadside diner, Cleetus?

Sparking with a lemon wedge, yes.

Fuck soda.

it's okay, we all know you make bank with your tips, you can stop trying to scam Veeky Forums

>tips

I play, "Just-the-tip" with your mom.

too awkwardly phrased to be effective
try again

>4000 calories
More like 1000-2000. Have you ever actually counted calories?
>400g fat/salt
nice

>implying that adding 20-60g of sugar to all that shit is nothing
now you sound like a fucking fatass neckbeard
i hope you get diabetes and end up having to amputate one of your limbs

Your mom likes me to put just the tip of my cock in her vagina. What's to elaborate?

So if I'm trapped somewhere in a cave somewhere in your shithole of a country, and I have a bottle of water, but someone trapped with me didn't bring water, j have to give him all my water? What a shithole! Here, I could just hit the guy with a rock and leave him for dead, and drink my water and live, and the rescue crew would just understand when they came to get me and saw all the blood. They're not socialist cavemen.

Drinks are a fucking scam at restaraunts. I'm not paying 9 bucks for a single pint of beer. Wine is even worse. I'd rather just order more food, because I can pour myself a beer at home, I can't cook what you're cooking.

Where do you live that you're paying $9 for beer unless it's a specialty item like Hoegaarden?

this. I always pre and post drink

I'm not American.

>9 bucks for a single pint
Holy John 3:16, user. Prices are outrageous only at our sporting events and even then they are $8 each.

I'm in Canada and it's not even that expensive. Australia?

Alberta. Nearly everywhere is 7-10. Absolute cheapest you could find is 5 during happy hour.

I also live in Alberta and you're going to the wrong bars.

Thats called being an alcoholic

Filtered.

>bars

We're talking restaraunts family. I go to a lot of places, like a lot, part of my job is going to restaraunts with clients, so I'm eating out 3-5 meals a week; I've been to probably 70% of the retaraunts in downtown Calgary, Kensington, Inglewood, and the Beltline, let alone tons of places in the periphery. That's the prices I see for booze.

I do because I have a medical thing. They're just lucky I try to hurry eating so I don't hog the table for longer than normal.

If Hoegaarden is 'specialty' and > 5$ (or 2-3$ during happy hour) I feel bad for you, son.

>2-3$
It costs almost that much in the liquor store. $9 for a half-litre isn't an unusually large markup.

>specialty item like Hoegaarden
>paying $9 for beer
senpai...you gotta step up your dining game

Same

I prefer to eat my calories, unlike hambeast OP.

sweet tea please

>this is what americans actually believe about socialism

I do a majority of the time. Occasionally I'll have unsweetened tea with lemon and maybe some Sweet-N-Low, or a root beer if it's one of those rare occasions I feel a soda would be worth it.

Because tips work by percentages. When you don't pay for a drink, the price is lower therefore, they'll get an overall lower tip.

Malt drinks are fucking awesome

>spoiling the taste of your food with flavored beverages

"normal" people dont feel the need to drink beer at lunch time

This.

Also water is refreshing and everything else on the drink menu is not. I always order a water even if I have another drink. Not having one with a high calorie meal completely ruins it.

Water, unsweetened ice tea and a beer

Fuck off I like OPTIONS REEEE

Yeah mate. Drinks are expensive.

No
>Could I have a glass of water, please?
That's how I order my water.

>Oh thanks but I don't need a napkin

Please don't be that guy

of course

water is integral to the proper digestion of food

in fact water is a very important factor in regards to all of the functions of your body and thus contributes greatly to it operating as smoothly and efficiently as possible at all times

You're not supposed to drink the finger bowl

in europe we dont screw our waiters and just give them a decent paycheck, here tips are not percentage based, usually small, not expected or mandatory and considered a reward fro excellent service

If I need to drive I order water, here in Italy your alchol level in blood must be 0 for the first 3 years since you have a driving license

Well yah since I have kidney disease, sugar with chemicals isn't my first idea when thinking about something to drink, so water

Its funny guesss my state

>you have to eat all of it before you leave

I'll take 'What are leftovers' for $200, Alex.

>>Charging for water
>Water is literally a human right.
Go out and collect your own then if you want free water, it costs money to treat and pipe water to you.

>adults in America - yes, that's right, people over 18 years of age - actually, unironically drink fizzy sugar drinks
>not only that, but they actually, unbelievably, order them in restaurants, in public, with everyone watching

I don't pay for drinks, its the same reason I wont go out to a bar

I try to reason this with my friends too
they want to go out and drink, but wouldn't it make more sense to drink and then go out? you are being marked up by 10000% on drinks at a bar

What law in yankland stipulates a fixed tip percentage?

Can't you tip however much you want?

i have this one friend who orders soda and it's kind of embarrassing

>i'll have a coke no ice
kms

Americans are so fucking hilarious

There's nothing at all wrong with ordering water, except, for example, if you ask for the water after you've already received your food in a fast food drive-thru window.

>mfw I bought an insulated steel growler and put it in my car
>mfw I chug 20 oz of chilled vodka before I go into the hockey arena and defeat the jew
>mfw it just looks like I enjoy drinking water and staying healthy

high octane autism

Selling water is not the same as denying water.

If someone can't afford to buy water, they can go to a different place that offers free water or use a public water fountain.

Every single time dipshit unless it's alcohol. And then I still get a glass of water.