What's the hardest Recipe in the World to not fuck up?

Exactly. I've never tried to make it, but I've heard it's difficult.

Making puff pastry isn't even that hard,you just have to laminate it and keep putting it in the fridge between layers

lel

that's not a double negative

puff pastry is not 'hard', just a ballache, especially if you're in a hot kitchen. i definitely recommend doing it at least once but i really do not give a shit if you buy it when you make me a wellington. i'd argue learning to do rough puff is a better and somewhat more technical skill.

I strongly dislike beef wellington.
I mean, it tastes good enough if done right, but it's a huge pain to make, and to make well.
It's just representative of this old-school, fussy, opulent nonsense that leads to abominations like lobster thermidor. I honestly can't stand the sort of food prep that requires hours to make what is essentially a delicious meal a huge time consuming luxury. Like a beef tenderloin with a mushroom sauce and a puff pastry cap I can get done in like 45 minutes. A lobster with a white wine and cream sauce should take like half an hour.
The Wellington and the thermidor just add so much labor for what? A little bit nicer presentation? No, just the myth of opulence and of luxury.

son you don't know what a 'huge pain' is if you think that about wellington and thermidor, they're actually quite relaxing and simple recipes

I've only made wellington a couple of times and honestly it's no big deal at all.

>> I can get done in like 45 minutes.
That's about how long it takes me to make a wellington from start to finish--though as I said above, I am taking a shortcut by buying frozen puff pastry. There really isn't much labor or effort to assemble a wellington.

>cook beef
>cook mushrooms
>chill beef
>wrap mushrooms and beef in plastic wrap
>chill wrapped beef and mushrooms
>wrap in pastry
>cook pastry
no way that's 45 minutes of work. Unless you're dumping a raw tenderloin into frozen pastry, at which point what the fuck is wrong with you.
Fuck souffle's if that's what you're referring to. Not only do they require careful mixing and folding, sometimes they just don't work because your oven seal isn't tight enough or the temperature regulation system decides to turn off the oven element.
Also, I make my own Peking style duck a handful of times a year. Mate I know about complicated, time consuming and fussy cooking. If you don't think that Wellington is at the top tier of possible home cooking without special equipment then you might possibly be retarded.

I know this is bait and you're stupid but it's not even a double negative

i'm not referring to souffle, souffle is even simpler, just have to know your oven/do trial batches.

peking duck actually is a lot of effort, fair play.

wellington involves like 5 components max and you just keep them cold, wrap them together and keep an eye on them in the oven and you can't go wrong, it's piss. nothing like a plated dish a la minute with similar and more sensitive components. thermidor is even simpler.

Maybe he wasn't including the inactive chilling time?

It's not very hard, any way. You cook the mushrooms and set up the wrapping area while the meat does a bit of pre-cooking, and even have time to wash a few of your dishes. Then, you wrap that bitch up and transfer it to a cleared fridge shelf in about five minutes, and take the thawing pastry out of the fridge while you're there. When the large beef log is chilled, your kitchen should be clean, your pastry should be ready for wrapping, and you should be well into an episode of Starship Sofa. Unwrap the meat into the waiting defrosted dough, put in oven on rack.

Throw together some dirty rice and salad while that's finishing up. Let it rest while you set the table. Wa-la. You're done. Great fucking job.

>no way that's 45 minutes of work.

Sure it is:
I start by throwing two pans on the stove, one for the beef and one for the duxelles. While they're heating up I take the frozen puff pastry out of the freezer and leave it out to warm up. Then I toss the mushrooms in the food processor and pulse. By the time I'm done with that (about a minute or so) the pans are now hot. Mushrooms go in one, the beef gets seared on the other. Searing the beef takes only about 5 minutes or so. It comes out of the pan and gets set aside on a plate to cool. So far we've spent about 7 minutes total. The mushrooms need longer to cook. Meanwhile preheat the oven and lay out my proscuitto on the plastic wrap while the mushrooms are cooking. After another 5 min or so the moisture has been cooked out of the duxelles. Spread out on a baking sheet to cool them down rapidly. (total time spent: about 15 min so far). They cool down damn quick when spread out thinly.
Then put your mushrooms on top of the proscuitto, beef on top of that, and roll it up in the wrap. Torque the roll then toss it in the freezer. Total time: less than 20 min so far. While it's firming up make egg wash. After about 10 min to cool, take out of the fridge, discard plastic wrap, and roll up in the puff pastry. Egg wash it, slap it in the oven. I prefer mine fairly rare, so the cooking time isn't all that long. In my convection oven it takes about 15 minutes, so it's pretty damn close to 45 min.

Lobster thermidor doesn't take long if you're not incompetent.

>the inactive chilling time?

The chilling time can actually be quite quick. Only the outside part of the "roll" needs to be chilled so there's no point in waiting for the inside to get fully cold. That's actually counterproductive anyway. It only takes a few minutes (less than 10) in a normal household freezer. I suppose you could do it even faster if you used a bath of icy water.

I see. Thanks!

Agreed, it's not hard at all. Honestly I find the biggest pain to be waiting for the water to boil.

-drop live lobster into boiling water
-boil about 10 min (depending on size of lobster)
-split it, discard gizzard sac, remove meat
-prepare the sauce/meat filling
-pour back into shell, cover with cheese, finish under the broiler.

>last step
>melt cheese under broiler or finish with a torch

this shit triggers me so hard that faggots are soooo impressed by melted cheese on everything

no one's impressed by that, they just like it. are you going to tell me melted/browned dairy products are not delicious?

ice water

>I did use store-bought puff pastry though

Only people who hate themselves make their own puff pastry. It's ok to make it like once a year for special occasions but you're not going to make it everytine you need it, that's just stupid.

cheese is good.

melted cheese is good.

i would not put cheese on my lobster.

aside from adding some ridges in the puff pastry, put some eggwash and some parmesan cheese for the crunch.

Good thing you live now in the age of TV dinners