How do I poison food that it's not visible and it doesn't taste weird? Any of you have that kind of experience?

How do I poison food that it's not visible and it doesn't taste weird? Any of you have that kind of experience?

A little bit of backstory: I'm living in dorms. I'm an athlete. I prepare food for myself so I can just reheat it in the evening. For the last 2 weeks someone is stealing my meat. There's no way to tell who is doing that cause I checked the fridge in morning and my meat was still there, but it was gone in the evening. I'm ready to poison it so I can get back to the motherfucker. I don't care if he gets hospitalized or just gets a diarrhea for a week.
Pic related: that's what the motherfucker has been stealing from me.

Have you tried being MORE of a sociopath?

eyedrops make you liquid poo.

but poison works well when the is already prepared. Cooking the food makes it not so poison-y

but:
Have you tried being MORE of a sociopath?

syrup of ipecac

>This is illegal

Go ask somebody else

Meat is poison, and it's already slowly killing the both of you.

Why not just murder your roommate, seeing as you're okay with doing it to every other innocent animal? I heard ricin is pretty potent.

Buy some pepper extract and spice the absolute fuck out of it. The good stuff that comes in the dropper bottles.

I said that I prepare the meat and keep it in fridge for reheating. I'm fine with adding the poison to ready made meat.
You are anonymous here. No one is going to press charges against you for this.

> sociopath
I'm actually antisocial and don't care if I kill someone. Most of people living in these dorms have no hopes for future anyway.

>i'm an athlete

Why is that even relevant? It makes it sound like you're proud of being a dumb jock, which makes you look like even more of a douche.

If I lived in your dorm I'd steal your and throw it in the garbage just to fuck with you.

You confront him like a man you fucking psycho

I'd say you're an anti-social narcissist, but it really all falls under the "sociopath" umbrella. Try poisoning yourself, you shouldn't pass on your disorders.

the fridge is open for the whole floor. There is about 40 suspects.

No one is actually anonymous here, man, and not caring if you kill them isn't cool either.

This will not solve your problem.

You will give someone the shots and not even know who or when. They might just decide to escalate things and steal more or go directly at you, and you still don't know who it is.

You aren't allowed to keep a mini fridge?

Take it up with the RA or whoever babysits you vermin. Grow the fuck up.

>simply mention being athletic
>triggers the fuck out of everyone on Veeky Forums
>induces total rage

the easiest bait ever. its almost like you losers got bullied in highschool or something.

probably a good idea. if those fat faggots take a big bite of that shit they will be crying and vomiting for hours.

>I'm actually antisocial and don't care if I kill someone.

So a sociopath?

Just cum in the food. You're clearly a faggot so it shouldn't bother you, and you'll get the satisfaction of knowing you made a bunch of dudes eat your baby batter.

buy a mini fridge faggot

>im a poor college student

you can get a used one for $20-30

>simply mention being athletic

Being athletic and identifying yourself as an athlete aren't the same.

Veeky Forums posters always feel the need to say they're coming from Veeky Forums, and are always absolutely retarded, demanding, and unable to think for themselves.

buy pepper extracts and inject it into the meat after cooking

that way you ruin it for him without going to prison for 15 years

this actually sounds good, if only I would know who eats my food.
Thanks but I want revenge
How is it fucking possible to prove that I poisoned someone on purpose? Except this thread.

>anyone on Veeky Forums is an athlete

>How is it fucking possible to prove that I poisoned someone on purpose?

If someone gets seriously ill or dies from this you can bet your ass there will be a major police investigation, then it's you vs. surveillance cameras, any potential witnesses, and a forensics team.

Stick with the pepper extract: it will ruin their day for sure, yet it won't kill anyone and you always have an "out" even if you do get caught: you simply like spicy food.

Let your meat sit out until you're sure it's very bad, then lightly fry the outside with breading and douse it in buffalo sauce to cover the taste.

Maybe they get very sick, or maybe they die. Who cares, and fuck reddit for being so moralfag

t. someone who's had their food constantly taken (I stole their belongings in return though)

it's not your place to judge
that's the judges job

either help or don't, don't be a little whiner girl. if he really wants to hurt somebody, then just let him do it, you can't convince him otherwise

you food thief

You can buy castor beans online and make ricin. It'll kill him dead and there will be an investigation - if you use a VPN then no one can trace that you bought the beans and you can play it off like the poison was meant for you.

Have you tried buy one of those micro-cameras and setting it up near or even hidden inside the fridge to find out who's stealing your food?

>i watched breaking bad
>this is totally fullproof

>except this thread

No surveillance cameras here.
of course not. Sounds quite expensive.

But is there really redditors in here? I mean, sure I acted like a jock in backstory, but I thought this just isn't like /b/ and people actually dislike me for not obeying the laws.

OP is a fag. I miss lunch thief threads.

No, reddit isn't actually here. Literally every time you see somebody be a spoilsport, they're trying to get replies to their post.

>that comma usage

*shrug* ricin is easy to make and you can buy castor beans online. Literally all you do is cook the beans, pulp them, and then squeeze the oil out.

>There is about 40 suspects.
Yup, he is definitely an athlete.
Probably a black one.

>eyedrops make you liquid poo.

FALSE. causes CNS depression and all sorts of scary shit, up to and including coma/death.

>>This is illegal
>If someone gets seriously ill or dies from this you can bet your ass there will be a major police investigation, then it's you vs. surveillance cameras, any potential witnesses, and a forensics team.

it's not going to be that complicated
>did he died?
>yes
>why
>ate somebody's meat, was poison
>whose meat
>OP's
and you're off to PMITA prison. At the very least you lose your scholarship, get kicked out of school and face a civil suit from the parents

stick with the hot sauce.

Ipecac will make them vomit almost instantly
Diarrhetic will make them shit uncontrollably
Best bet, go to your local pharmacy & find a liquid laxative
Using a syringe inject the meat with the exlax

Just drink only water, don't eat

>Using a syringe inject the meat with the exlax

People who recommend this have no idea what they are talking about. The idea sounds great until you realize that most laxitives require a rather large dose to be effective. It's not going to be possible to conceal that in a piece of meat. Super strong hot sauce makes a lot more sense since even a tiny little bit of it is enough to ruin someone's day--it won't be easily detected.

Rub your dick on it. If there are any women around you can assured it won't be them eating it.

Just buy a box with a lock, poisoning is a terrible idea because even some joke poison can kill someone with a previous condition he didn't tell you about.
There are better ways to prank someone

This intrigues me. Thanks!
Oooh, eyedrops do that? That's nice to know. Also, no one knows whose meat he is going to eat. Also it's possible that he got bad from eating something else in breakfast or such.
White and blonde here.
Thanks!
Seriously thanks to all of you, I will most likely pussy out and don't do anything but I gathered some valuable info for other times!

>"Most of people living in these dorms have no hopes for future anyway."
>athlete
Yeah I'm sure you'll make it to the top of the pops.

...

you could also put a camera in your kitchen to find out who the perpetrator is, then you can personally inject him with poison

How about drugs? Put some nasty drugs in the food, the person who eats it has the most horrible experience of their lives, it can't be traced back to the food and nobody dies or gets injured

Yeah but most of that stuff actually tastes bad so you can't hide it in food

Ooh - then later, after he finds out who it is (It'll be the guy who went to the hospital because he was tripping), OP can hide some drugs in his locker and then report him.

>comma splice
>typo
That was my first post in the thread.

Does college have lockers?

He mentioned athletics so I figured sports team locker. But now I re read it it doesn't look like that's the case. So hide it in his dorm room instead