If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve? Me? I'd serve crab legs

If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve? Me? I'd serve crab legs.

You would never sell because people would sneak their own crab legs into the theater in backpacks or suitcases. How would you combat that?

I'd serve charcuterie of your shitposting dick and balls ballsack.

Spotted dick and seamen

Clam chowder in a sourdough bread bowl

Fuck off back to your containment board.

doritos, pop rocks, carrots

Pssh, sneaking in crab legs. The real pros sneak in bucketloads of caviar. Where've you been?

Popcorn and assorted candies would be my choice.

Something that can be eaten in relative silence.

deep fried mint ice cream and SURGE

i'd sell only healthy, vegan snacks to inform the ignorant meat eaters of proper nutrition. i'd play lots of informative vegan videos during intermissions.

Just to trigger you I'd have a full feature Bavaian nuts kiosk.

Can someone explaun this meme to me? I've been seeing it here and on /tv/ way too often

It's a /tv/ meme, and /tv/ shitposters have been actively trying to kill Veeky Forums for the past year since they killed their own board with shitposting and forced memes.

Ignore, hide, report. They're the number one cancer.

Any kind of junkfood but popcorn
Fuck I hate popcorn

The profit margins on movie popcorn are astronomical. You don't have to like it. You just have to like money.

Congrats, you'd only attract the vegan crowd and everybody else in town would stay the fuck away from that "weird hippy theatre" after the opening week.

You'd essentially be creating a vegan circlejerk, which all that vegans want really.

I'd do a fry bar. Potatoes into french fries can give you some of the best profit margins; top them off with shredded cheese, bits of bacon, scallions, chili, whatever the heck the people want. Maybe hotdogs and nachos, since they could use the same toppings.
Aside from that, big sodas and candies.

>everybody else in town would stay the fuck away from that "weird hippy theatre" after the opening week.

nope, they just need to be educated. once i do that, they'll be flocking in to my theater.

I'd divide the offered food by type of motion picture:

>movie
popcorn, chips, soda

>film
selzer, Greek yogurt

>Cinȩma
bai lin gong fu or gyokuro tea, plate of beaufort d'ete, caciocavallo podolico, and perhaps melon

>Kinṏ
guests will not be allowed to eat during Kinṏ, and ideally shouldn't eat for at least 12 hours before it begins

Corn dogs man. Corn dogs smothered in nacho cheese, bacon, and jalapenos are god tier gas station food

Boiled eggs, boiled cabbage rolls, over cooked broccoli and all you can eat free sugar free candy.

Can the movie theater be re-imagined as a TV restaurant?
-Private, sound resistant booths.
-Waiter button to signal you need service.
-Ability to pause, rewind, fast forward, play.
-Decent 40-50" televisions.
-Lay-z-boy type seating.

Advantages:
-You set the social expectations. Some people like casually talking during a film. You can leave your phone on and text.
-Better food quality that doesn't require customers feeling gouged.
-Go to the bathroom without missing a part of the film.

Disadvantages:
-Less capacity per showing. I'm totally ignorant of how the licensing works and if you'd be operating at a loss each time you showed a film to a small audience like this.
-Customer turnover very slow compared to most restaurants. Maybe this isn't so bad if they are purchasing more alcohol/food during this time?

Uncertainties:
-Would a restaurant like this even be able to acquire newly released films compatible with TVs?
-Is making each booth sufficiently sound resistant financially feasible, or a huge upfront risk?

In the end, I'm not sure this model has too many benefits over a drive-in. Maybe you are able to sell food more reliably though, which is a big plus.

>shredded cheese

Yall niggers need to learn how to put your shredded cheese into a bechamel first. Cheese sauce is where it's at.

So how are you gonna educate them by giving them a vegan selection of food if they don't come to your theater and eat your vegan selection of food?

Is that Lou Malnati's world famous seafood style 'go 'za?