What a Fedora Imagines When He Orders Black Coffee

>*A portly fellow in a flame shirt waddles to the counter of a Starbucks*
>"What would you like sir?"
>*The atheist squints around the coffee bar, his hands at the sides of his khaki shorts like he had two holsters. With one hand he expertly pulls out his wallet and with the other, he brings the tip of his hat down before placing his order*
>"Coffee. Black."
>*A hush falls over the patrons and staff. Women gush in their panties as whispers from men can't believe what's transpiring. The barista looks like he's about to faint, his grip on the cup furiously shaking as he slides it over the counter to our hero*
>*The cheetoh avenger slaps down a sticky five and a quarter with his hamhock fist before mumbling to no one that they should "keep the change", knowing he's a far more euphoric human being than people that put sugar or milk in their coffee*

...

I order black coffee because I hate coffee and don't want to pay for extra stuff that I'm supposed to enjoy with coffee
but I drink coffee because I hate energy drinks more

Cream and sugar doesn't cost extra fuck face

coffee is disgusting

We've got one boys. Bow down before the ultimate fedora

I order my coffee black because I enjoy the taste
I like my coffee hot and milk or cream cools it off too much
Having something sugary with your coffee like a donut cookie or muffin is better than pouring sugar in your coffee
I have a bigger dick than you
Fuck you OP

I like my coffee hazelnut flavored, with hazelnut creamer and brown sugar.

true patricians order cafe latte

so disgusting infact that muslims build the first coffee houses despite it not being allowed according to the quran. I mean, they could always say "no" to wine and bacon, but coffee just had to be an exception.

My grandma used to drink black coffee and she got me on it. Jow whenever i have a cup I think about her and how awesome she was and it makes me smile. Also, I do enjoy black coffee, but i am not opposed to a little cream and sugar. Just not a shit ton.

Grill dectected

I meant I'm not going to pay for a cappuccino or latte
also, if cream and sugar are free, that just means I can put those things in their by myself you fucking retarded autist

I like my coffee scathing.
I put it in a thermos and drink out over 4-6 hours.
Highlight of my work day.

*unsheat masamune*

What did you just said about the most glorious way of consuming coffee?

*teleport behind you*

*slice you like a fine kraft velveta slice*

pfff nothin' personnal kid

*go away while tipping my favourite great-stepfather de Dora*

>2016
>still drinking coffe

congrats. these people have become a meme.

My life was a meme once too, when people posted pics of my poutine and smoked meat sandwich that I took.

>>*A portly fellow in a flame shirt waddles to the counter of a Starbucks*
>>"What would you like sir?"
>>*The atheist squints around the coffee bar, his hands at the sides of his khaki shorts like he had two holsters. With one hand he expertly pulls out his wallet and with the other, he brings the tip of his hat down before placing his order*
>>"Coffee. Black."
>>*A hush falls over the patrons and staff. Women gush in their panties as whispers from men can't believe what's transpiring. The barista looks like he's about to faint, his grip on the cup furiously shaking as he slides it over the counter to our hero*
>>*The cheetoh avenger slaps down a sticky five and a quarter with his hamhock fist before mumbling to no one that they should "keep the change", knowing he's a far more euphoric human being than people that put sugar or milk in their coffee*

Truly a force to be reckoned with.
*sigh*
Can I be THAT man?

black coffee is the absolute best thing to make you shit

I harvested meme this morning on the Cringe Channel

nice