Would you buy a book on a masturbation journal? For the price of $5

Would you buy a book on a masturbation journal? For the price of $5.

The book will be journal entries of my masturbation session, for example:

April 01 2016

"Today I was jacking off to Japanese porn. It's a porn about a man who goes around raping a women at work. What the fuck, Japan.

I stroke my dick furious and cummed after 45 minutes. It was a great fap"

April 02 2016

Today I was at work and I fapped in the washroom. I watched HD porn on my cell phone and cummed inside the toilet bowl.

Etc etc.

Let me know what you think anons, it might be the next best seller.

Or maybe we can coloab and write fap stories and publish it on amazon.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/user/pumpthatpedaldotcom
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

I could get this on /b/ for free

You brought up a good point, dear user, but most normies don't go on /b/ so they might be interested in the fap stories.

>those dead eyes

good lord what has this wench done to herself. any before pictures? what would possess someone to make themselves look so fake. I don't mind plastic surgery when done right. like all the hot korean girls with mad surgery look real good. but my God her face and tits are terrible.

Bimboification is really a deep and fascinating fetish tbqh

Eye job, nose job, tit job, lip job.

American plastic surgery is shit tier compared to god tier Korean aesthetics ...

if you think any sexual fetish is even a little bit deep or interesting you're both an imbecile and a pervert

I think the gas pedal fetish is interesting

youtube.com/user/pumpthatpedaldotcom

It sounds like a wanky gimmick. Will you at least include some sophistry so that it reads like Marcus Aurelius or something? 'Masturbations'.

In short, yes I would buy that book.

Puritan cuck detected

it really does sound like a terrible gimmick, sry OP

No, and "cummed" fucks me off. Say "came".

>Puritan
>cuck

pick One

If you're serious about this, at least put in some work. Don't just half-ass it with "Today I jacked it to some porn the end." Go in-dept, describe the scene in detail, what you feel as you're doing it, your thoughts and what you think they're feeling or how you would have fucked her better. Something like that.

>I just gave a random stranger advice on writing a masturbation novel.

The idea is alright but your style is worthless reddit tier shitposting.

This lad is on to something. Some sort of a disgusting NEET contemplations journal with pretentions to wisdom sounds pretty good.

I'd buy it just for the goofs. If I were to do it myself I'd probably take 's suggestion. If it's gonna be a a journal of shit like what you wrote in the OP, don't bother. But if it's gonna be something really in depth (like actual paragraphs of stuff per day), it might be interesting.

are there actually people who take 45 minutes to jack off?

If you're shit at finding porn it can take that long.

...

>CUMulative

>May 11

wew

>It sounds like a wanky gimmick

My cock starts to hurt after 5 wanks.

...

Why would I buy yours when mine is way more interesting?

Anyone else reached a point where you are unable to fantasize about a woman willing to fuck you while masturbating because it's too ridiculous to even picture inside your mind? I have to get creative now, otherwise any attempt at onanism only leaves me more depressed.

Advice on how to pick up chicks: don't call masturbation onanism

Hello.

Yeah buddy, it's going to be more in depth, I was in a rush when I created the thread.

It would be more something like this:

April 03 2016:

Today I jerked off at the mall. It's a high end mall full of patrician people - mostly upper middle class income; they come here to buy expensive brand names and eat shitty mall food.

I went upstairs to the bathroom to masturbate. I took the handicap stall at the end, in case someone looks under the stall and watches me jack off.

The thing with jacking off in the mall is that, people taking a shit next to you can see your shadow of you jerking off.

I position myself with my feet facing the door, as if I'm taking a shit.

I go on PornHub to find my favorite MILF porn before jerking off. I have my head phone on.

That awkward moment when the janitor comes in the washroom and mops underneath your door but I stay focus and ejaculate on the bathroom wall.

FUCK YEAH, ALL THE CUM DRIPPING, MASTER LOAD!!

The next guy is going to be in for a surprise.

I dabble some tissue on my dick and then walk out of the washroom like a boss.

>tell me what you guys think ...

Sorry guys, here's a rewrite:

Today I jerked off in the mall - with style. I ejaculated on the wall and ceiling because my fire hydrant dick is powerful.

It's a high end mall, full of pretentious, ignorant upper middle class people. They walk around with their fucking bags and brand name jackets and buy $30 bar of soaps and $16 tin of green tea. Yeah, they're pretentious fucks.

I ventured upstairs to masturate, in the pristine washroom. If there is no shit stain in the toilet bowl, it's pristine to me. I position myself in front of the toilet, with my feet facing overwards. You want to do this because curious fucks will wonder why you're facing in front of the toilet for the past 45 minutes ... I jacked off in the handicap stall because it's roomy.

I tuned to my favorite MILF video, a blond middle aged woman who demands men to cum inside her ass and pussy. Where can I get a MILF like this? I let my pants drop and whipped out my thick cock (it's 12 inches on a good day) and start fapping.

Fuck yeah, take that huge dickaroo up your poo chute, I said mentally to myself. She was getting a huge dick in her mouth, ass and pussy.

I masturbated for 45 minutes because I want to train my cock to be rock hard, like a Kung Fu Monk that can break a brick with his dick. At exactly 45 minutes mark, I willed myself to cum.

OH FUCK, I'M CUMMING. I ejaculated on all 4 walls. Cum dripped down the wall, like snails climbing down a tree.

The next guy was going to be in for a surprise.

I dabbled some tissue on my dick hole and walked out of the washroom like a boss.

>let me know what you think

The Scarlet Letter

good christ read a book nigger.

yeah, i can only wack it to hetero fantasies for like a week after getting laid, then it just goes back to being too unrealistic (as if being a barbie bimbo big booty brazilian tranny getting gangbang bukakked by bbc studs is more realistic lol)