' Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow dressinggown, ungirdled, was sustained gently behind him on the mild morning air. He held the bowl aloft and intoned: —Introibo ad altare Dei.'
It might just be because I grew up around Irish people who talked all types of retarded but I can read Ulysses just fine.
Justin Nelson
He didn't mean anything. Literature is a scam on the middle class.
Christian Carter
Most likely Joyce was drunk or high on metamphetamines while writing it. Luckily he started making a bit more sence in his more entry level diddly called Finnegans Wake.
Caleb Myers
I remember reading this years ago when my English was still pretty mediocre and I could barely understand those few lines.
Jordan Gutierrez
this dude comes down the stairs he pretends like he's a priest doing mass with the shaving shit
William Bailey
lol l'el
Jacob Torres
Maybe I'm a bit thick, but fuck this wank type of writing, sounds like pure arse poop.
Andrew Wilson
Am I being memed or can people really not understand this?
I get when he uses words that don't really exist or writes sentences that run on for miles but this is pretty basic English.
Adrian Walker
Mate
Evan Parker
I think we're being memed desu
Ayden Carter
I can understand it, it's just a fucking boring stale way of expressing yourself, you can tell the author is jerking his cock to how much of an intellectual tosser he is "Christ im an artfag!" fap fap fap.
Carson Cook
This thread fucking triggers me
Michael Wilson
Alright lad?
Carter Price
' Halted, he peered down the dark winding stairs and called out coarsely:
—Come up, Kinch! Come up, you fearful jesuit!
Solemnly he came forward and mounted the round gunrest. He faced about and blessed gravely thrice the tower, the surrounding land and the awaking mountains. Then, catching sight of Stephen Dedalus, he bent towards him and made rapid crosses in the air, gurgling in his throat and shaking his head. Stephen Dedalus, displeased and sleepy, leaned his arms on the top of the staircase and looked coldly at the shaking gurgling face that blessed him, equine in its length, and at the light untonsured hair, grained and hued like pale oak. '
Dominic Nelson
Why do people call Ulysses deep when Joyce did the equivalent of going to the thesaurus and finding the most archaic synonyms to use for describing things?
Levi Bell
Because plenty of people can point things like this out but few can do it.
Alexander Cruz
because it came at a time before such posturing was actually prevalent in literature, so people actually had every reason to believe that it was a sincerely smart piece of work.
Henry Jackson
Dunno mate, that stream of consciousness thing was pretty fucking neato. Evolution of language not necessarily in Ulysses but certainly in Portrait is why I go back to Joyce.
Bloom leaving things unsaid with his wife's infidelity and then going mental at the pub was top.
Motherfuckers all the time now go on about national identity in literature but Joyce was all about that shit.
People look retrospectively at stuff with a pair of 2016 eyes and just lump stuff in together as tropes or wanky. We can't look back to the day but surely we can appreciate its impact? There's a reason why people go back to Joyce, Prost etc and I think it goes beyond intellectual posturing.
Landon Baker
He's describing everyday things through the lens of a Catholic mass. Go to church sometime and like magic you'll get it. > inb4 but I am an enlightened le gentleman At the very least you're uncultured and cannot into basic references. If you're European really you just need to get out and do things
Blake Bell
It means, literally "Teeheehee, what am I referencing now?"
Joseph Gonzalez
For every Joyce there's a Waugh, a Chesterton a Muggeridge or -shudders- a Greene. Catholics are judged by the company they keep so it shouldn't be a surprise if nobody has a clue about those Fenian practises when their standard bearers let the faith down.
Tyler Lewis
>-shudders-
Faggot.
Jack Reed
It's the intense and damn near incoherent ramblings of a severely autistic drunk faggot who had nothing better to do in his shitty Irish town other than consume literature and be a fucking bitch.
The whole 1000 pages of cold turd is literally just him saying "haha look at these unique irish feelings you british faggots don't even know. braveheart best day of my life"
Is this really what lit has become? This seems like an incredibly simple passage to understand once you translate the Latin, which means "I will go to the altar of God," and when coupled with the fact that his, "mirror and razor lay crossed."
Matthew Perez
yes, it's saying buck mulligan is a ostentatious, boisterous dork
graduate 6th grade already, Veeky Forums
Juan Davis
Now this comment here is a piece of wanky prose.
Alexander James
wow its literally jesus hahaha what a hard hitting reference
Cameron Gonzalez
>once you translate the Latin Go to a Christian mass where they have communion wine, you'll see the chalice raised and blessed like this.
Jeremiah Richardson
I see you're applying the Joyce method of using unnecessary synonyms.
Jacob Ortiz
How astutely ostentatious of you, mate.
Jeremiah Moore
There are no gods, but I'd rather read Waugh or Greene than bogtrotting pimple-scratchers like Joyce.
Landon Gray
Reminder that Joyce leaked two Sparknotes of Ulysses to his friends.
Reminder that people only think Ulysses is good because Joyce's fucking cheat sheet said it was.
Tyler Anderson
no because if i was writing prose i'd give the words room to breathe, which joyce does
so epic memed!
Leo Evans
You supercilious fucknugget
Luis Evans
It's proof that people with syphilis shouldn't write.
Xavier Price
You can't even describe what you mean by that you pretentious shit.
Carter Wilson
euphony
Gabriel Phillips
am I getting memed or do you people really not understand that if you wanted to pick an actual word wankery passage from Ulysses there are a lot to choose from but you'd only know that if you read past the first paragraph
Brayden Roberts
Yeah I meant, assuming there was nothing else you could take the hint from. It literally says it in plain text what he is talking about.
Joshua King
Omg i kekd so hard on all this quotes. Thanks user
Jordan Martin
Joyce is like the Nickelback of Veeky Forums
Daniel Gomez
10/10
Aiden Cox
It's an analogy to a catholic mass. Considering that he is Irish it's extremely obvious to what he is doing. It's hardly him being the riddler in this instance.
Andrew Bell
He meant to begin the day.
Aiden Johnson
Please tell me you don't actually speak like this ad are just trying to impress Veeky Forums
Evan Nelson
Buck Mulligan walked up onto the roof of the fort that he lived in. He had with him a bowl of shaving lather on which he had placed his mirror and razor. They were placed across the bowl in the shape of a cross. His dressing gown wasn't tied (as a priest's vestments would be) and was blowing in the wind. He held the bowl of lather in the air and spoke in Latin as if he were performing a mass. "Introibo ad altare Dei" he said.
Nolan Adams
I am so fucking mad right now. This is how I imagine a "Joyce for Dummies" transcription would read.
Colton Brooks
Gosh, what I would give for a jpg of an old edition that has fresh jizz on it.
Justin Morgan
How do you not get it
It's very simple and is simply describing a funny scene.
Julian Parker
He paused and looked down the stairs that circled the inside of the tower. In a hoarse voice, he called to his roommate. His roommate's name was Stephan "James Joyce" Dedalus, but Mulligan liked to call him "Kinch." "Kinch, come up here, you Jesuit!" Mulligan, still acting like a priest, walked forward to the short wall at the edge of the roof. He looked around, and mockingly blessed the tower, the country around the tower, and the mountains. Then he saw Stephan Dedalus coming up the stairs. Mulligan bent towards him and made crosses in the air while gurgling and shaking his head. Dedalus was tired, and he wasn't amused. He looked coldly at Mulligan. Mulligan's hair wasn't cut like a monk's hair. It looked like it was made of oak. Mulligan had a long face, like a horse. Finishing his mock blessing of Stephan, Mulligan lifted the mirror so he could peek, just for a moment, into the bowl (or perhaps " the chalice") underneath it. "Back to barracks!" he said sternly, and put the mirror back down. Mimicking a preacher's voice, he added: "For this is the genuine Christine: body, soul, blood and wounds. Now start the slow music. Everybody, close your eyes. I am having some trouble turning my shaving cream into white blood cells. Please be quiet." Mulligan looked up and whistled. He paused, and his white teach with gold fillings were visible. A mouth of gold. Hmm. You could describe a skilled speaker as having a mouth of gold. Mulligan whistled twice more. "Thanks, old chap," he said, implying that his whistles had been signals to a hidden assistant. "You can turn of the electrical current now. The chemical reaction is over."
Sebastian Murphy
he comes up the stairs you silly billy
Landon Torres
lol
Josiah Brooks
this is legitimately what Veeky Forums needs so they stop acting like autists
Christian Jackson
You can tell who has no sense of euphony if they think he's just pulling random words out of his ass.
Zachary Brooks
A girl stood before him in midstream, alone and still, 212 A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man gazing out to sea. She seemed like one whom magic had changed into the likeness of a strange and beautiful seabird. Her long slender bare legs were delicate as a crane’s and pure save where an emerald trail of seaweed had fashioned itself as a sign upon the flesh. Her thighs, fuller and soft-hued as ivory, were bared almost to the hips, where the white fringes of her drawers were like feathering of soft white down. Her slate-blue skirts were kilted boldly about her waist and dovetailed behind her. Her bosom was as a bird’s, soft and slight, slight and soft as the breast of some dark-plumaged dove. But her long fair hair was girlish: and girlish, and touched with the wonder of mortal beauty, her face. She was alone and still, gazing out to sea; and when she felt his presence and the worship of his eyes her eyes turned to him in quiet sufferance of his gaze, without shame or wantonness. Long, long she suffered his gaze and then quietly withdrew her eyes from his and bent them towards the stream, gently stirring the water with her foot hither and thither. The first faint noise of gently moving water broke the silence, low and faint and whispering, faint as the bells of sleep; hither and thither, hither and thither; and a faint flame trembled on her cheek.
>you will never write this
Jason Lopez
IMO Mulligan was taking his shaving materials with him down stairs in a 'mass esque' way to the toilet to not only shave but probably take an early morning shit, the toilet being 'golds alter', mocking the catholic church
Wyatt Campbell
How is this even wank writing though? It's just a couple of relatively simple sentences and then some Latin.