What advice would you give to a young guy who is about to enter the corporate world?

Try to work less than that if you can. No one can maintain 9am - 11pm productively, and those who do are kidding themselves.

this is not a bateman gig. get ready to eat all the shit deals from the bulge brackets while getting paid literal fuck all - especially with sub par british salaries.

Why aren't you suckers getting into software engineering. Literally £70k a year salary after 1 year experience, and no cock sucking needed to get there.

This shit is easy.

> Try and save enough money to put into your taxfree 20k ISA, and if you have any left over, put it in a vanguard etf bond acc so you pay capital gains tax (which is lower than income tax - retarded I know).

See, I have no idea what any of this shit means man. I'm gonna be so clueless with my money lol. Aren't ISA's a waste of time anyway? 20k is nothing really and what's the returns on those things?

I'll try, it just depends how efficient I am.

I'm not gonna pretend like it is. I'm fully aware that I'll be surrounded by Goldman, JP Morgan, UBS and other BB cast offs.

came to post this
good luck OP

Trust none.
Women are worst in work field.
If someone likes you you will be used.
90% of things is never said.
Think why someone did something.
Value your self as a GOD!
NEVER say to much.

Run

I am not an autistic robot.

>If someone likes you you will be used.

Is this meant to be a good thing or a bad thing? Because I heard if you're constantly given work and in demand it's a good thing, because it shows the managers see you as competent and reliable.

It means get ready to suck a lot of dick if you want to move up. Literally, guzzling cum, letting it hit your face, slide down your chin, slurp it off the floor, taking a spoon to your little pink asshole and scooping out that beige sauce from your once virgin puckered anal cavity, all while keeping a nice smile on your face and proclaiming "Yes sir"

>but im ready for it

i miss being a clueless college kid

They will make you think you are useful but they will present your work as theirs without giving you credits.

Point me to a software engineer that's a real alpha.

>alpha

Stop believing in this alpha and beta bullshit and be who you want to be. Wtf is wrong with men these days...

no point in working hard. just network and rub elbows with higher ups/brown nose and they'll look out for you

Just bust a nut in your bosses office

Post manbobs please xir.

( . ) ( . )

...

Well it's all about making your boss look good right, it sucks, but that's the nature of the beast.

Start building a business on the side. Guaranteed you will fucking hate your job and wish you never went corporate in 5 yrs max

Every day try to internalize the fact that you are a literal bootlicking cuckold engaging in rather meaningless drudgery for the sole purpose of appealing to the societal definitions of success

You get 20k a year to put away in tax free savings. Get an account with iweb:

iweb-sharedealing.co.uk/share-dealing-home.asp

Then get a vanguard fund- I recommend the retirement 2050 GBP.

Try stick at it for half year, then quit if you still don't like it.

How are you getting 70k after a year? Im on 30k atm, and can see myself on 60k in 2 years.

Remember that you are a filthy goyim and your role is to make Mr. Shekelburg even richer.

Could you explain the vanguard fund? How is it different from an ISA? Currently, I only use 1 bank account, should I open more?

Its very unhealthy for you the a science denier.

So an ISA is just a way to get tax free savings, and you're allowed to put 20k in an ISA a year. But you can have an ISA in anything - stocks, bonds or a bank account.

Vanguard is a company which issues funds which 'passively' track stock indexes. This means the fund just blindly has a certain number of stocks, rather than a person actively picking them. This usually means the funds have low fees.

If you open an account with iweb, you get a stocks&shares isa, and a normal account. From my experience, iweb is the cheapest broker in the UK. It's also reliable and doesn't do anything funky with your stocks (like lend them out).

In both accounts, you can invest in a vanguard fund.

I suggest a vanguard fund because it's easy and you don't have to bother researching stocks because you'll want to enjoy the free time u have.

So I get the ISA and put my investment in that vanguard thing in it (somehow) and it protects any gains I make from tax?

Am I on the right track?

My brother was senior manager at a big 4 firm, enjoy 70 hr work weeks believe the hourly rate is about min wage when factoring in overtime

start a crypto division. advertise tax advice to NEETS on here. you'll be ceo in 5 yrs

Boss. But your coworkers will try to look like your boss in your eyes. Always make sure you are not working for some faggot. Always take credit.

Impressive, very nice

Just remember that everyone is playing little games. Don't trust anyone.

Yeah exactly, the ISA protects your gains from tax.

Definitely get a stocks and shares ISA with iweb. Do it now before you start. It's £25 to setup and £5 per trade.

I've been working as a management consultant for 9 years at another of the big 4, never had to work the kind of hours mentioned here on a regular basis so don't worry. Your appraisal will be based upon 4 things:
1) Doing a good job on your client work, be keen, use your initiative and make sure there's no stupid errors in your work and it should be enough.
2) Developing your practice/team (e.g. Helping with interal events, donkey work with thought leadership pieces, etc). Your role in this will be really dull as a grad but it will get noticed and you'll get the opportunity to network with the senior people in the team who you won't meet on client work.
3) Sell work. Get yourself lined up with a Director or partner who is good and see what your can do to help them here. You'll have to go looking for this.
4) Developing others. Again you'll have less opportunity here as a grad but this will also stand out if you do it (e.g. on boarding new joiners on projects, mentoring after higer apprentices or work experience students etc).
The main thing I found is its all the stuff outside your client work that gets you noticed. Also, there will be be drinks, dinners, internal events all the time. It's a ball ache but try to go to as many of these as possible at the beginning to get your name our there and meet people.

Savings wise it might be worth thinking about putting some savings into a SIPPs as you get tax relief (if you put in £1,000 then you'll also get a further £400 contribution from HMRC) Downside is you can't withdraw it until your retire though... Good luck!

Worked at PwC and thank shit I left. Get to senior level then gtfo. Heads up for what to expect: your boss will probably be a coupla years older than you with a coupla years of experience. Prepare yourself for some real delegation action. Extremely competitive environment, expect to be fucked over a lot because of that. No need for me to mention the working hours and having 0 life. On the bright side, you get excellent work experience that is WAY ahead any above average prof services firms. I left and now working in an average company. I work 8 hours a day in busy season time, and the methodology is 10 times simpler than a Big 4's. During/after working hours I mainly read about cryptos but I also enjoy my life with friends and shit. Good luck

>What advice would you give to a young guy who is about to enter the corporate world?

Learn Excel really well

>I heard if you're constantly given work and in demand it's a good thing, because it shows the managers see you as competent and reliable.
>I want to add value to my work and not just be another run of the mill graduate.

Don't be such a cuck

Do your time, save money, invest aggressively (e.g. crypto) and get out as soon as you can and do something meaningful with your life

if you want to make money, start your own business

Hi, I my name's John. I've been lurking for a while, but I've finally made an account to post this. I need to get my life off my chest. About me. I'm a 46 year old banker and I have been living my whole life the opposite of how I wanted. All my dreams, my passion, gone. In a steady 9-7 job. 6 days a week. For 26 years. I repeatedly chose the safe path for everything, which eventually changed who I was.

Today I found out my wife has been cheating on me for the last 10 years. My son feels nothing for me. I realised I missed my father's funeral FOR NOTHING. I didn't complete my novel, travelling the world, helping the homeless. All these things I thought I knew to be a certainty about myself when i was in my late teens and early twenties. If my younger self had met me today, I would have punched myself in the face. I'll get to how those dreams were crushed soon.

Let's start with a description of me when I was 20. It seemed only yesterday when I was sure I was going to change the world. People loved me, and I loved people. I was innovative, creative, spontaneous, risk-taking and great with people. I had two dreams. The first, was writing a utopic/dystopic book. The second, was travelling the world and helping the poor and homeless. I had been dating my wife for four years by then. Young love. She loved my spontaneity, my energy, my ability to make people laugh and feel loved. I knew my book was going to change the world. I would show the perspective of the 'bad' and the 'twisted', showing my viewers that everybody thinks differently, that people never think what the do is wrong. I was 70 pages through when i was 20. I am still 70 pages in, at 46. By 20, I had backpacking around New Zealand and the Phillipines. I planned to do all of Asia, then Europe, then America (I live in Australia by the way). To date, I have only been to New Zealand and the Phillipines.

Now, we get to where it all went wrong. My biggest regrets. I was 20. I was the only child. I needed to be stable. I needed to take that graduate job, which would dictate my whole life. To devote my entire life in a 9-7 job. What was I thinking? How could I live, when the job was my life? After coming home, I would eat dinner, prepare my work for the following day, and sleep at 10pm, to wake up at 6am the following day. God, I can't remember the last time I've made love to my wife.

Yesterday, my wife admitted to cheating on me for the last 10 years. 10 years. That seems like a long time, but i can't comprehend it. It doesn't even hurt. She says it's because I've changed. I'm not the person I was. What have I been doing in the last 10 years? Outside of work, I really can't say anything. Not being a proper husband. Not being ME. Who am I? What happened to me? I didn't even ask for a divorce, or yell at her, or cry. I felt NOTHING. Now I can feel a tear as I write this. But not because my wife has been cheating on me, but because I am now realising I have been dying inside. What happened to that fun-loving, risk-taking, energetic person that was me, hungering to change the world? I remember being asked on a date by the most popular girl in the school, but declining her for my now-wife. God, I was really popular with the girls in high school. In university/college too. But i stayed loyal. I didn't explore. I studied everyday.

Remember all that backpacking and book-writing I told you about? That was all in the first few years of college. I worked part-time and splurged all that I had earned. Now, I save every penny. I don't remember a time I spend anything on anything fun. On anything for myself. What do I even want now?

If you want to read the rest go to Reddit or Google search a section of this story.

>I start at a Big 4 (Deloitte) in September on one of their graduate schemes and I'm not even sure what I'm gonna do with my first pay check or anything.
I recall living with my roomie Jeffrey when he started his graduate Deloitte program. Save your money faggot. Yes, you do need a couple nice suits though. I only have two.

My bud Jeffrey has been at Deloitte since 2012 and has been his only corporate job. Last I checked he was a Tax Senior. He has it good in the Dallas office, but during this time of the year, def stressful. Good luck.

>go to Reddit
fuck you.