So I, like most sophisticated Nu-males, enjoy trying various exotic regional cuisines. Obviously I know that American Chinese food isn't authentic and has basically nothing to do with actual Chinese cooking, but why is it so fucking impossible to find "real" Chinese food? I live in Manhattan. We have Ethiopian, Turkish, Yemeni, Cambodian, Mongolian, Korean, Thai, Colombian, Argentinian, Persian, Malaysian, Japanese, English, French, Hungarian, Peruvian, fucking every kind of restaurant in and around my neighborhood, but every time I ask someone about a fancy Chinese restaurant, they always tell me it's not "real" Chinese food. Well what the fuck IS real Chinese food and why is it impossible to find in America? Is it literally made of cocaine and dead babies?
What the fuck is authentic Chinese food and why is it so difficult to acquire?
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I can't tell you why it's so difficult or where to find a good one, but I can tell you how to spot a "fake" one.
In China they eat very few rice in restaurants. When I was there I had to ask several times until I actually got some, because I was sick of all the meat they put on the table.
>nu-males
Stopped reading there.
Because it's fucking disgusting thats why. American style chinese food is onjectively better
these are the same people who eat dogs and pedo piss eggs, exposure to whites has done nothing but improve their cuisine
>the same people who eat dogs
Iirc only the south does, the economically stronger north thinks it's barbaric. China is "only" as large as the US, but their cultural differences are much, much more grave than the ones between Democrats and Republicans ever have or will be.
>pedo piss eggs
While that's a problem, it isn't actually part of their cuisine on purpose.
Chinese Food can be pretty good at times.
Chinese immigrants purposefully modified chinese recipes to appeal to american appetites so they could make a living
Protip: if it's anywhere in Manhattan at all, it's very unlikely that it's authentic, regardless of the cuisine.
Manhattanites don't want authenticity. They say they do, but they don't. They really, really don't. They want whatever's new, now, next and trendy.
Wow. I had no idea.
>pedo piss eggs
What does this even mean
...
I'd have guessed he means this:
youtube.com
Didnt know pedos pissed eggs that gross. Or pissed eggs at all.
Yep. Fortune coockies? Californian invention.
It's was not just a matter of taste, it also has to do with the fact that a lot of ingridients were simply too hard to find in America till recently. It's one thing when Italians want to cook since most of the stuff the would find in Italy was brought to the US during the colonial period (Grain, cows, some spices, etc). On the other hand most chinese stuff stayed in china and as such the immigrants found whatever tasted similar and used it.
Fun fact: The term "snake oil salesman"comes from this. In China it was a common folk remedy to use the fat and oil from a certain snake as a rheumatism treatment among other things. When they arrived in the US they brought that knowlodge with them but there were none of the snakes here. Crafty cunts started taking similar snakes and seling the oil as an "ancient oriental medicine"and the term was born.
Wrong, those are century eggs. Different cancer. THESE are virgin boy eggs.
>fake eggs
Literally why.
How the fuck are chemical eggs cheaper to make than getting chickens living in cages eating their own feces to shit them out by the dozen?
Practically speaking, the easy way to get authentic chinese food is to go to a Chinese grocery with a hot food counter. If you see chicken feet and tripe you're in the right place.
>Fortune coockies? Californian invention.
They're actually from Japan. Pic related.
>virgin boy eggs
Jesus Christ. I thought you were referring to the ammonia flavour of century eggs.
In another short documentary it said that it is basically chemical waste they get for free.
Why the fuck not. If you're a highly functional sociopath and want some money to enlargen your child sexslave dungeon?
It's quite funny how socialist China probably is closer to the lolberterians ideology in that regard than any other (more or less) developed nation
Just use worse quality meat and other parts of animal and then it's authentic.
Fancy chinese restaurant is just a higher class of american chinese. It's got some authentic dishes but even then most old school chinese will probably just say that the quality of ingredients are incomparable.
There is no academic face representing the entirety of chinese cuisine and you would never go to a formal accredited school to learn how to cook authentic chinese cuisine. It's just a ton of regional specialities.
This probably applies to most cuisines barring the ones that have holed up behind academia like frenchshit.
Maybe you could learn a "style" like sichuan style at some fancy school but if you ever tried to use it in a context outside of the regional dishes aren't you basically just a fusion chef at that point.
Me at Chinese restaurant: Please, give me something authentic. I'll have an order of whatever your family eats on Saturday afternoon.
Waiter: One orda Orange chicken coming up
>undesirable cuts of meat
>tasting bad
This is why people say white people's food sucks
t. not even Chinese
>pedo piss eggs
Okay, so this keeps coming up. Can someone please elaborate further.
Some fuck in China collects the urine from schools that teach 8 year old boys or something, then boils eggs in the urine.
Sure. So in the Dongyang region of China, they pay prepubescent boys to piss in a big vat of eggs and then they boil it. Sells twice as much as regular eggs.
en.wikipedia.org
Google it, you lazy asshole
>Virgin boy eggs or "tong zi dan" (Chinese: 童子尿煮鸡蛋; pinyin: Tóngzǐ Niào Zhǔ Jīdàn[1]) are a traditional delicacy of Dongyang, Zhejiang, China made by cooking eggs in urine collected from young boys.[2] Every year in early spring time, the urine of prepubescent school boys preferably under 10 years is collected and boiled with eggs and sold for 1.50 yuan,[3] around twice the price of a regular boiled egg.[4] In 2008, Dongyang recognized the eggs as "local intangible cultural heritage."[5]
That's not really true. It's just that a lot of first generation immigrants aren't chefs with enough status to appear in the New Yorker, the Times, Zagat, etc. and can be very difficult to find if you yourself aren't part of that enclave or culture. Also, something that is prepared "authentic" may not necessarily be made by a great cook.
Lots of chefs from other countries came to NYC to combine their homeland's culture with the American approach to cuisine. It's uncommon for a great chef to be absolutely purely authentic in the United States at all, least of all Manhattan, where if you're not making money from your food, you fucking die.
t. Manhattanite
An egg is 0,75 yuan, which is about 15 cent. I'm not sure whether I should think that's cheap or expensive.
It's about 3x cheaper than where I'm from, but then again their standards are way lower and we're talking about china...
china is a big ethnically diverse place (don't tell a government supporter that though, oh my god), that's not even a logical request
So I get that there are a lot of cultural differences that don't really translate well (cheese for example sounds pretty revolting and bizarre on paper), but come the fuck on China! That has to sound fucked up even to other Chinese.
Good point. It's like asking for "Authentic European Cuisine"
But we can still list off a whole pile of dishes from throughout Europe, explain exactly what country (and even what region of that country) they come from, and know exactly where we can order it.
Holy shit. Here I thought that Japan was weird.
China takes the cake... and probably pisses on it and eats it.
China is a very big country,
Even though I am a Chinese who live in Macau,I won't say I know what is "actual Chinese cooking"
The cooking style has so big different even in the same province.
The common Chinese food in USA is actually Cantonese cuisine.
Which is not the most popular cuisine in China now,even though it is my favourite one.
That's fucking hot
It is just like Korea poo wine,99.99% of locals have never tasted one in their lifetime.
But why boys specifically?
The people in this thread are right, there are lots of different types of "authentic Chinese food." Lots of it is found outside of Manhattan. Flushing and Brooklyn's 8th avenue are good bets. Go where lots of Chinese people live, and see which places are crowded. Or yelp the specific type of food you want: Sichuan, Taiwanese, etc.
As for Manhattan, there obviously still lots of places that are authentic. Hot kitchen is pretty authentic Sichuan. Xi'an is a little whitewashed but a different type of Chinese cooking (i.e. western China) that you might find interesting. Kung fu little steamed dumplings is good for xiao long bao. Obviously there are a million little places in Chinatown, look for places that are crowded (with Chinese people, not White Devils).
t. gweilo dating Chinese (sorry, Taiwanese) girl
What is the most popular cuisine in China currently?
would we do so in a thread where someone asked where to find authentic European food in NYC?
>you can too find authentic!!!
>but authentic doesn't make money!!!
>so people don't open authentic restaurants because they're in business to make money!!!
>but you can find authentic restaurants even though no one's opening any and they don't exist!!!
wut
Hands down, it's probably because of this:
Some weirdass old local religious/militar leader probably had that kink and initiated the whole stuff.
...and to answer OP's question, it's hard to find this kind of food as a white person because most of them (surprise) cater to Chinese, have menus in Chinese, and assume that you're not going to like what they make so they don't bother to advertise or try to attract white people.
Forgot to mention Congee village for Cantonese food with a mix of authentic and Americanized. And wherever you go, ask for the Chinese menu. Best to have a Chinese speaker or just point to pictures.
It's easier to find than authentic Chinese but that doesn't mean we wouldn't point out the best places to find goulash, wienerschnitzel, quiche, or paella.
I'm guessing that the logistics of getting boys to pee in buckets are easier.
make friends with a chinese boy and go eat with his family. make sure his parents are first gen. note that the cuisine would be vastly different if they speak cantonese or mandarin.
best chinese cuisine is dimsum desu
cuz girls have cooties
Maybe I wasn't perfectly clear in my point, I was saying that it's uncommon for chefs in Manhattan to do pure authentic food, but it is possible to find.
Some of the reasons I listed were that:
-1st generation cooks aren't as famous or well connected as their contemporaries
-risking your business on authentic food that the locals may or may not like is a big gamble financially due to the extreme rents in the city
-most chefs from other countries aren't even out to create the most authentic menu from their homeland, they tend to mix styles
Generally the "authentic" food that I'm introduced to here in the city is from an immigrant friend who knows a guy who knows a guy, and that fiend speaks the languange of whatever the food is supposed to be from. Sometimes it's great, sometimes it's just ok, but they tell me it's the real deal, and I know that I probably wouldn't have been able to find this from some magazine or newspaper review or a food blog that I follow.
No, everyone is Han DELETE PLS
What the fuck is a nu-male? Maybe I'm dating myself, but seriously, what the fuck is it?
Also, different climates make it difficult to grow non-native ingredients. That's why it's either hard as fuck to come by, or extremely pricey to purchase at market.
Dim sum is greasy garbage. If it originated in America it would be considered junk food.
So what? It's still the most fun you can have with seven of your closest friends at 11am on a Sunday.
>you can totally get it!!!
>you just need to be part of the culture that makes it and speak the language and know a guy and make sure it's the third blue moon that month and that jupiter and neptune are aligned with aquarius and wait for hell to freeze over first to get it!!!
okay then
Well if you live in manhatten you should have money, so take a trip to wherever the fuck you want to taste authentic cuisine, realize it really isnt that good, and go back home.
Authentic usually means either once a year or scraps made into something decent year round, living in america you can have the once a year any time of the year, if you want to go eat cabbage soup you dont need to travel far, just go buy some cabbage, shred it and boil it in water.
Maybe throw a few pigs feet in there, wa la, authentic.
What is with this utterly over the top and oblivious hyperbole? Can you make a comment or argument without resulting in strawman statements?
I want to eat that shiny donut real bad. Where would one purchase a donut like that?
>repeating back exactly what user says, only in greentxt is "oblivious" hyperbole
lol
Okay, it's this weird paleolithic belief system they have going.
They believe that desirable attributes from animals and people can be 'absorbed' through ingestion. Much like how in the ancient times some warriors thought that if you ate your rival's heart you'd gain his power.
They really think that circa current year. So let's say a tiger is a symbol of strength and virility. So if I killed that tiger and made it into soup I'd gain those respective traits. To them this is complete and utter gospel fact. Tiger parts, tiger powers.
So in China nothing is seen more lucky than having a son. Young boys are symbols of luck and prosperity. So the problem is not even Chinks are fucked up enough to cut up a boy and eat him. So they do the next best thing. They collect piss, which according to them is full of luck and prosperity powers.
It's a stupid meme term like 'alt-right' that's in vogue like 'hipster' was 5-10 years ago. Originally it was pretty descriptive, but now all attempts to discern what it means come up with conflicting results. Just stick it in Veeky Forums's meaningless insult box along with faggot, nigger, fedora, neckbeard, pleb, and cuck.
You keep doing you, user. :^)
>date a chinese girl
>ask her to cook for you
>???
>success!
Seriously. Or fuck, just befriend one if you are a nu-male. Delete this thread.
My chinese-ex made one thing for me during our brief but passionate love. A desert, which was sugar cane melted in milk with chopped papaya. She also got me some authentic chinese soup when I was sick. I didn't touch it. It was dumplings and some cabbage in some sort of broth. Lots of soups they eat.
Sichuan food is now No 1 in China.
It has strong flavour and the price is cheap,so young people and workers love it very much.
Although the "actual Sichuan food" is hard to find too.
A billion Chinese can't be wrong. How much shota piss do I have to drink to win the power ball?
And flyover! Don't forget flyover! I mean I don't like em either but -god damn- it's like listening to Rain Man muttering half the time in here.
>"Flyover, definitely flyover. Time for Wapner..."
>It was dumplings and some cabbage in some sort of broth.
bruh that was wonton soup
No, it wasn't. If it was, I would have ate it, bruh.
you're greasy garbage
wumao go home
See, the trouble is that the good fortune properties naturally found in boy piss is lost in the boiling process. To glean the real benefits it must be drank directly from the spigot. But that is illegal in most places.
what is the greater power level, a billion lions the size of the sun or a billion chinese on the power of shota eggs
>See, the trouble is that the good fortune properties naturally found in boy piss is lost in the boiling process. To glean the real benefits it must be drank directly from the spigot.
Kek.
I wonder if someone can actually get those chinks to believe this and they all start doing it.
Theyre the most superstitious motherfuckers on the planet.
A lot of chinese restaurants (outside of fucking Manhattan anyway) do authentic dishes that aren't listed on the menu, which chinese customers (the only ones who want the stuff) will just expect them to serve & order in mandarin. The main thing i'm talking about here is congee (rice porridge), oily breadsticks & various kinds of preserved egg
Otherwise the usual kinds of actual chinese food that shows up a lot are; dumplings, steamed buns, fried rice, soup noodles etc. The only stuff that's basically never legit is the whole strips of meat fried in syrup thing (general tso, orange chicken etc)
The most straightforward way to get a taste of real chinese cooking is go for Dim Sun
authenticity is a marketing gimmick to sell shit that doesn't actually taste good.
>>>Flushing
look for steamed food that isnt using oil,flour,sugar
legit chinese .... taste is not so good when you are used to McDonald's burgerking, lil ceasars and cup o noodles
your taste buds are blasted same shit witn Japanese food its light flavor isnt conducive to shit loaded palates
>japanese food
>light flavors
>China is "only" as large as the US
Friendly reminder that population of China is bigger than this of USA, Europe and Russia added together
It's really not. I lived in beijing and piss eggs are really common, you can buy them everywhere. Never heard about pedo piss eggs though.
Here in the UK, especially LONDON and other major cities you just want to go to your Chinese markets for authentic Chinese ingredients.
Authentic restaurants are harder to find and usually tend to be tucked away. Go to your nearest Chinatown and look for places most populated by Asians, if they offer both English and foreign menus you're in for legit food usually
go eat that junk shit
its not what keeps folks living for a hundred years
watch "A bite of china". similar food is not impossible to find in the US. but first you have to know what to look for.
Huh?
If you live near a large city with a Chinese community, there will be at least one decent dim sum place. Go there.
I have been able to find authentic Sichuan, Hunan, and Northern Chinese food in my area, that's surrounded by a large amount of Cantonese cooking.
Northern Chinese food is very surprising. No rice is served and if you want any carbs with their food, you gotta order dumplings and noodles. But I love the pork and mushrooms meals. You'd think it's muxurou, but not really. I don't even know what it's called, but it's got a crapload of mushrooms and other vegetables in it.
What exactly keeps people living in Japan for a hundred years plus?
>this is your first thought
jesus christ
>Obviously I know that American Chinese food isn't authentic and has basically nothing to do with actual Chinese cooking, but why is it so fucking impossible to find "real" Chinese food?
Do what I did - just cook it yourself. Something like Hong Shao Rou is fuck easy and most of the dumplings aren't challenging either.
Well there's miso, which is a staple in japanese cooking. It's nice, but really anything but light in flavour.
Bump
It's a bit of a trip for you OP, but
>traditional delicacy of Dongyang,
more like yang dong, amirite?
they crack the shell of the egg and cook it in little boy piss
no
fucking
jokes
note they only crack the egg enough for the piss to get inside the egg but not enough for the egg to to fall out of the shell
What retarded people say that? Black cultural food is dirt cookies, and Hispanic is all variations of rice and beans. This thread alone shows Asian countries eat weird ass stuff but is generally better than the first two. White people actually make the best food worldwide from Italians to French and other recipes you think black people started like cooking chicken a certain way or gumbo was originally made by whites too.
thanks doc
NYC is a fucking shithole and needs to be nuked to oblivion.
Racist and misinformed as fuck.
Definitely go to flushing, it's highly populated with Chinese immigrants so the food there will be close to authentic.
In general if you want authentic, don't be afraid to check out dingy looking restaurants that only have Asian people inside who speak little English.
Really? I don't see you proving otherwise you moron.
what's the etymology of the word gumbo?
century eggs and virgin boy eggs are two different things
how are people in this thread so dumb that they can't even do the slightest cursory google search
Apparently it is the word for Okra in the languages from western Africa. Check out one of the episodes of "Mind of a Chef" with Sean Brock traveling to Africa; it goes into the roots of Gumbo and how it evolved after it was brought by African slaves to the US south.
>look for places that are crowded (with Chinese people, not White Devils
This is what I do, I look for the place with the highest percentage of Chinese people, look over to what they have ordered and order the same.