Irish cooking

Obvious troll is obvious.

Closest you've been to Ireland is a plastic paddy parade in your hometown, which I strongly suspect is in the USA.

Stereotypes will only get you so far bucko, and only if you use them with a modicum of sense.

what the fuck is going on here

An user is pretending to be Irish for some reason.

Wtf I swear I'm Irish and lived there for 25 years

And it's perfectly clear to anyone whose been there for longer than a fortnight's holiday that you're talking out of your arse when you say that.

You don't know my life, I do. I was born and raised in dublin

Post a vocaroo senpai

It looks more like a guy samefagging this weird series of posts.

Shite.

That's an obvious lie. No human children have been born in Dublin since 1989.

Why?

Im telling you the honest truth right hand to God

That's just not true I was born there

Alright OP, we're gonna need a vocaroo, like said.

Well it's me calling him on his bullshit, and I'm not him.

His first post is a dead give away that he's as Irish as Kunta Kintae... I'm just amused by his protestations and failure to realise his mistake(s).

Why?

You're the fool I was honestly born in Ireland you're being an idiot

To see if you have an Irish accent

>he doesn't get the reference
Obviously not Irish, then. Had you gotten the joke, I'd have acquiesced, but you hadn't and so, it's obvious that you're about as Irish as Empress Michiko.

It's as clear as fucking day that you've never been near Ireland you daft cunt. Now stop making a bloody eejit of yourself.

Even if he is fake, you're just taking his bait. What's the point?

Both sides of the conversation are jerking themselves off right now.

Actually, Michiko is definitely more Irish than OP.
She's been to Ireland, studied Irish history, speaks a little Irish and was educated by Irish nuns.

there's where you slipped up. Irish people swear to the virgin mary.

I do have one

Just because I don't get your stupid reference doesn't mean I'm not Irish, I am

I am Irish! I was born and raised there I'm serious

It's not fake I am Irish

I was born and raised in Ireland

I was born and raised unite land no lie

That point I must concede. It just amusing that anyone would want to do it.

>honest to god
filthy protestant scum detected

This reminds of this time I had dinner with my corworkers. I make a rule of not socializing with coworkers, and I should not have broken it. This may take 2 posts, it was THAT bad.

6 coworkers met at someone's house under the pretense of "Irish stew". I grudgingly accepted the invitation and arrived at 2 pm (when I was told to come). I brought traditional soda bread that had to be baked first. The host made a bit of a stink about using the oven when he had other things in there, but I told him I wanted it fresh.

The stew was still cooking and the host was already drinking alcohol at this time. In the middle of a conversation with a member of the opposite sex, the host tells me, "Please, no talk about politics. PLEASE not today". I said if more people talked about politics we would be in a better country, and he got very argumentative so I just dropped it.

I was drinking apple juice that I brought over and the host kept trying to get me to have a beer. He was obviously intoxicated and starting saying how maybe I would be relaxed and "cooler" if I had some alcohol. It was pathetic, like peer pressure from a high school TV show.

Anyway, at that point I became withdrawn and went for a walk. I came back right before dinner, and that is when the fun started.

He made "Irish stew" with beef, carrots, Worcestershire sauce, black pepper, hot sauce, oregano, tomato, and various ingredients. I started telling others that proper Irish stew should only contain mutton, potato, onion, and water, and that beef, tomato, black pepper, hot sauce, and other ingredients would not be available then and therefore it was a modern stew, not Irish stew.

We started eating and someone asked me about what I had said about real Irish stew. The host looked annoyed so I told him. He turned red and told me if I didn't like it I could "get the fuck out and take my apple juice with me".

*in Ireland

For the last time im tellling you I'm Irish

I was shocked and speechless. He left the room and his girlfriend (they are unmarried but live together) apologized. Eventually, people started talking more comfortably and he came back and was brooding and drinking more.

The stew was okay, but not authentic. I asked him if he knew that mutton was on sale at a local store and he flew into a tirade, bringing up any small error or faux pas I have ever committed at work. People were trying to calm him down, and I simply responded to him in a quiet and calm voice, and said that I appreciated his invitation and his "take" on Irish stew, but it would have been nicer if the company had been more warm.

He got up and pulled me out of the chair, stretching my sweater at the neck. He was literally screaming in my face and had his fist up in a threatening manner.

I told him I would call the cops if he hit me. He then told me to get out and take my "fucking juice and shit bread" with him. A second loaf was still in the oven with 7 minutes left, and I said I wasn't leaving until it was cooked and I could take it.

He shouted at me to leave or he would call the cops ON ME (imagine) and then threw the bread out of the oven on the ground. I was shaking with emotions and told the group that I enjoyed my time with them but I couldn't say the same about the host.

It was a horrible affair, but I decided to make authentic Irish stew today, because I was let down yesterday and had a hankering for it. It is simmering on the stove and I plan on bringing it to lunch tomorrow, one bowl for me and some for the host. It will be a subtle form of revenge as well as a way to show him that I am a better cook and am the more mature, forgiving person.

Any other stories of hosts from hell? People who cannot act respectful towards others in their own home should not have dinner parties.

...

Stop

>For the last time im tellling you I'm Irish

And for the last time I'm telling you that you're an extremely obvious liar.

Now, this can go on all week or you can put up some of your pretend Irish recipes and we can all laugh at your poor grasp of reality.

>(they are unmarried but live together)

holy kek I love this pasta. You can just picture the fedora on this hypothetical persons head.

Fine I will post some of my recipes to prove this to you

I swear I'm irish

Appropriate pasta since we've obviously got Irish Faux Guy here this evening.

You do that Hank.

Potato leek and chicken pie I made last week

Jaysus, as Oirish as Liffey water!

I can't believe I'm being ganged up on for no reason
I was born and raised in Ireland
This is ridiculous

Look, to be frank user, after your OP, there is nothing that you could say, do or swear that would convince me or anyone from, or having spent any time in Ireland that you had any more than a very cursory knowledge of the country and that largely built upon (mistaken) stereotypes.

Lurk moar on Irish threads.

Was it any good?

D'ya lyke dags?

How does someone prove that? Do you want the guy to post a photo of him in Ireland next to a sign or some shit?

The fuck is this god damn meme.

Welcome to Veeky Forums.

For my Irish bros (OP obviously not included), what was the name of that cookery programme with the guy cooking things then climbing mountains and shit? Can't recall.

You're a fool I was born and raised in Ireland it's funny how you're all so convinced when you're completely wrong

It was delicious

Yes

Thank you

I can't even tell who's trolling who in this thread.

Do irish fags really have such a strong no true scottsman mentality? Is OP actually irish? Is OP intentionally trolling? Is OP getting trolled? So many questions, but this thread is thread of the week for me. I'm losing all my keks over here.

I'm not sure he could, convincingly, after his opener. It was kinda Obvious

Is seafood ever included in what one would call traditional Irish cooking?

If he'd just post a vocaroo we'd know,but he's being a Fag so he's obviously some middle class suburban kid from new yawk

You know the episode of Simpsons where You is getting deported and he comes off with the patter ending in "the Nye Mets are my favourite squadron"? Well... Op is a little like that.

Apu, not you.

>unite
YOU'RE FROM THE US YOU LIAR WHY ELSE WOULD AUTOCORRECT GIVE YOU AWAY

I am Irish!

This is op I was born and raised in Ireland

I am Irish I can see how my post could be misleading but I am

Yes but it is not a huge part of Irish cooking and used to be cooked more in the past

Fine I will post one if that would help

What?

Paddy and the Hershey Highway?

Calm down Tex.

What would that even give away?

Bastinn, more likely.
People over there are about as Irish as a burrito yet love to tell you about just how Irish they really are and love """"""""""""""traditional"""""""""""""" Irish foods like corned beef and cabbage and Shamrock Shakes™.

Stop

I am from Ireland

Read the first paragraph of The Hobbit

I've read it

CEO is that you?

Whatever we you want us to believe, Bubba.

I'll just throw another sod o' turf on the fire, put my 23 children to bed under the thatch and listen in awe to your tales of moving to Amerikay and cooking traditional scran for the cowboys and girls.

You're a bully seriously I was born in Ireland you wasted your time

>not getting your children to put the turf in the fire while slugging whiskey and yelling sexual slurs at your mentally traumatised wife

You're doing it wrong.

In the vocaroo you silly

>Potatoes, cabbage, you name it.

I think you've already named all of it.

I've made no secret of the fact that I believe the closest you've come to Ireland is being allowed to sniff your mum's glass after she's had a wee Bailey's.

However I didn't doubt your sexuality until that post, tell me mo cara, do you sit down to pee?

He forgot the Aberakebabra group.

from italy here, but I had corned beef and cabbage for lunch, so I guess i'm irish, too!! (:

Fuck off I am Irish you're a bad person

Aye, dead on Ellie-Mae.

Stop

Sure thing Ma'am!

Don't call me that

Why shucks little lady, I didn't mean nothin' by it.

Stop please

Sure thing, jus' let me woaaaaah this ole horse of mine.

Horse?

Tell you what, why don't you just mosey down to the chuck wagon and rustle us all up a mess of that traditional Irish cookin' like you get in your homeland.... With beans.

What would you like me to make

Something that'll make me Riverdance.

Just STFU you little bitch.

I have just the thing

>Just STFU you little bitch

You'd swear you'd just left Ringsend Tech yesterday!

Go potato famine yourself, OP

Stop

very very very good thread me lads

I am irish

It amused me.

I just hope I haven't offended that young American girl who was pretending to be Irish.

me too desu, what are some typically irish things you like doing?

So's CJ Stander.

Stop I am Irish you're a jerk

I grew up doing a lot of hurling