Have you ever pretended to read a certain author to impress a girl? Be honest

Have you ever pretended to read a certain author to impress a girl? Be honest

It doesn't count as pretending if she believes you.

Pretended to have read loads of Sartre and Camus. Had a 45 minute introductionary course of existentialism.

I impress my spouse by pretending to have read more than I have. Not necessarily any certain authors, just in quantity

Tangentially related, but I took an African American lit class because a qt I liked was taking it. The class was okay, but I still regret that I chose that over a Milton course offered at the same time.

Yes, all the time. My whole life is a lie.

You made the better decision

A friend who uses Tinder once messaged me asking for "feminist friendly authors" so he could act like he'd ever heard of or read Margaret Atwood or Virginia Woolf

I don't care about girls, I have more important things to waste my time on.

t. chronic masturbator

Or, just as likely, a woman.

I only masturbate 1/day.

No, because I did that once and it turns out the girl was an expert on the subject.

Tried bullshitting my way out of that one but I knew she could tell.

Never again.

I once pretended that I liked a certain girl's music in order to impress that girl.

Murakami
it worked

>woman
>expert on something
niceme.me

I pretended I hated what she liked
>"I read poetry a lot user, do u like poetry?"
>"I don't. In fact I hate it. Poetry is for women and faggots"
She orgasmed instantly. Girls like when you opose them, it shows you have attitude

no but i pretended to not hate palahniuk. i was close and didn't want to undo all my hard work.

I read a bunch of those vampire love stories where the vampire falls in love with a human girl/boy(not Twilight) they were cheesy af and the girl ended up dating someone else but it only last a month(ended last week)

classic

I love this board

No, I never talk to a girl.

thats fucking stupid

No but I started reading things I hardly ever read be aue of a girl and now I can talk to her about it a lot and know what I'm talking about.

>having to pretend to hate what women think

step up senpai

For some reason, I tried my luck with an art major once, and occasionally the subject came up. I went into a detailed history of modern artists being dealt violent justice by mobs for being pointlessly shallow and obnoxious (this was when that guy made a giant butt plug in Paris) and said I was glad that he got his ass kicked. Basically I hated every artist she liked, (obviously the POC, liberal, performancey art bullshit) and by extension I sort of implied that I thought her art was fucking boring too. She said I had a point and that I was intelligent but she was "disappointed". Subject never really came up again.

She professed a love for entry level lit like Vonnegut, Heller, and Murakami and she'd usually shrug off my literary recommendations.

The only recommendations of hers I truly liked were the animes she liked, but then never deeply.

I was honest with her every step of that tryst and it got me nowhere.

Sounds like you were just an overly aggressive dick.

I dont agree with that guys ways either, but cmon, NOBODY wants to sit and listen to you talk about how everything they like is shit.

>I was honest with her every step of that tryst and it got me nowhere.
cmon man, "step up"

nobody is talking about sincere deadpan hate here
do you not understand that you need to be a certain amount of playful around women?

it's a great womanizer trick to hate their preferences, but only if you're unironically or ironically ironical about it. what it really shows, in a no-such-thing-as-bad-publicity kind of way, is that you actually care about what her preferences are in the first place.

yes, Borges

she told me she loved Borges, I said "me too" and hopped the bus to go buy Ficciones, I read it and loved it and never saw her again.

Thanks for putting me onto Borges, Sandy

I'll admit you guys are right on this particular subject, but I left out the part where I was usually very loving and kind and made her laugh and she was monstrously egotistical and a blatant liar. Even then, whatever it was, I managed to be somehow charming enough for her to keep seeing me about 4 months straight.

The fact being, her and I were completely incompatible. It was a strange attraction that got me stuck in that in the first place. I was super drunk and I thought she was intelligent and nice, and everything after that was a disappointment. I have no idea.

thats a wonderful story

Not him but
>whack off 1-2 times per day
>spend the rest of the day free from girls being distractions
>have no problem reading even dry nonfiction with a girl staring at me as she pretends to read her own book

Being socially functional would cripple my productivity and would all but inevitably leave me with less money for books. It also helps to have a youth entirely devoid of romantic and sexual successes, so it's habitual to assume that any interaction with girls will just be a waste of time.

Once you learn to live with the loneliness you can get a lot of reading done. The irony that this will make you more attractive to many girls does not escape me.

Are you only an occasional masturbator? Where do you draw the line between the two?

>this will make you more attractive to many girls

But does it really? How can you tell?

>he tries to impress others
>others don't try to impress him

What a pleb.

Surprisingly enough I've had more interactions with girls once I stopped really caring about hooking up with them. I joke around with them but for the most part I'm all business.

I think dressing better also had something to do with that, but overall there was an increase.

I have pretended NOT to read books in order to fit in. I find this even worse.

i have pretended to BE an author

it... it didn't work.

I would avoid any situation where that's even necessary.

I thought this was a thread about pretending to be a certain author to impress a girl. I was hoping you picked someone dead.

was he dead?

"y-you ever hear of ... M-Moby Dick?"

u madman

yes. J. K. Rowling

>Surprisingly enough I've had more interactions with girls once I stopped really caring about hooking up with them.
>I think dressing better also had something to do with that, but overall there was an increase.

t. "regularly misquotes scientific studies" guy

i dont even read studies

i can see how that could be true

Sure. Not to all girls, but the ones who like reading are just as starved of guys who read as Veeky Forums is of girls who read. I get checked out most frequently and approached most aggressively by girls who read and who see me reading, especially if it's over multiple occasions.

As far as actual content of what you read, you can make almost any book sound interesting, but the more you read, the more likely it simply becomes that you'll be familiar with something which a girl finds interesting. Even if it's not something they're particularly drawn to, being excited about it and sharing what you've learned will captivate them if only because they like seeing you be passionate about your interests.

>tfw realizing Senjougahara might actually be the best girl

how to impress Annie

No.

gene greene

Her favorite author is Yumeno Kyusaku. She was best from that moment.

Once, ended up reading the novel on the down-low, biggest waste of my fucking time. Could've had a lambo if I just read the summary.

Fucking hate it when I meet a guy and tell them that I like reading and they tell they like it too.
>So I ask, what do you read?
>Oh Game of Thrones is my favorite book series :) have you read it?
>No.
>Awh, too long for you? ;p

;__;

Haruki or Ryu?

Oh and one guy before that said he liked reading too, last book he read was one of those Dan Brown books, like 8 years ago. Ookay..
>yeah I loved reading those Dan Brown books, sitting by the window and drinking tea

I thought only girls were this cringey.

what do you think?

>not being gay
Truly pleb

I don't claim to have read them, but girls assume since I'm pretty well read that I'm familiar with Jane Austen and the Brontes, and I am conceptually and I'm not rushing to read them, so I roll with it.

At a guess probably Haruki, but you can never tell these days

>>whack off 1-2 times per day
>>spend the rest of the day free from girls being distractions
>>have no problem reading even dry nonfiction with a girl staring at me as she pretends to read her own book
I knew this feel, but when I switched to Christianity I wasn't allowed to jerk off anymore :\

now I'm constantly distracted

God wants you to get married, user.

I heard he's ok with Russian mail order brides.

I read the twilight series to impress one once. It didn't work.