Is there a correlation between having a lifetime partner and being successful researcher?

Is there a correlation between having a lifetime partner and being successful researcher?
I can't handle romantic shit, or pretty much anything that has to do with other people.
I don't think I can raise a kid either.
I just don't want to marry in general.
But when I look around, every successful person in academy that I know is already married and has a content life.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=xtS46Wfsxnw
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

Define 'successful'

The term is broad, but what I meant as 'successful' can be translated to have a nice track record in researching, i.e. has an ass load of papers (heavily cited by other researchers), is in the steering committee of a subfield/field, work on big projects, etc.

I think having someone that cooks for you when you work really helps.

Nah, most women nowadays don't know how to cook.

Paul Erdős

What's actually important is having someone who will help you manage your everyday life while you spend all your energy in research. Having a faithful waifu surely helps in this regard.

Even Erdos had close friends who'd keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't OD on math.

Then don't marry. Newton never married.

>or pretty much anything that has to do with other people
Then you're fucked. Not because of romance but because you need social skills to succeed in research.

Well, I was wondering if Newton could have done more if he has a partner.
I was vague, sorry. What I mean is I don't want to take care of anyone at a personal level.
I can function just fine at work.

>Well, I was wondering if Newton could have done more if he has a partner.
Probably not. If he didn't want a partner it was probably because he knew it wouldn't be good for him. Sounds like you are in a similar scenario. Society tells you "man being married and having kids is da bomb everyone should experience it." But the truth is not everyone will appreciate that kind of thing or find it worthwhile and that's completely fine. It's not something that unequivocally enhances mental function like proper nutrition and exercise.

i am better at math when i have a gf

i also have to spend time with my gf instead of spending time on math

i think the trade is worth it

Not him, but I don't think I can masturbate for the rest of my life now that I have tasted real sex.

>OD on meth

ftfy

married guy here.

if you have your priorities in order when looking for a partner, marriage is bretty gud.

i spend about an extra 15k$ a year being married, but in exchange i get a live in maid, cook, personal assistant, baby sitter, and sex dispenser. i know that sounds callous and autistic, but you faggots only understand quantifiable benefits. the dollar value for all those services were you to contract them out to a third party company would be over 40k$ a year.

i get way more shit done at my job now that i'm married than i ever did as a single guy, and i'm pretty confident that my improved efficiency is why i'm in the comfy position i am now.

more importantly, marriage is social proof. a man without a family isn't as trusted because he has no skin in the game.

Glad you feel that way oldfag.
Honestly, I had a girlfriend once. It was very good overall but when we had problems, my life went upside down real fast. I couldn't concentrate on math or anything at work.
Maybe I actually have no skin in the game, that's why I'm afraid of getting into it.

Then keep having sex for the rest of your life with various people. Marrying would probably just weaken your sexual life after a point.

>more importantly, marriage is social proof. a man without a family isn't as trusted because he has no skin in the game.
How can I get around this? Can I pretend to be a gay?!

Not him but why would you care honestly?
Most people actually don't give a shit if you are married or not.

Author with an h-index of 83 here. I am not married.

Get a gf that's just as ambitious as you are, if possible smarter.

my gf is fucking brilliant when it comes to her field. She was a published author when she was 16 and I suspect she is smarter than I am. I also suspect a slight dose of autism, as she MUST have things certain ways or she gets very frustrated. She's pretty sexy too so I both lust for her and respect her.

Women like this usually are feminists, but if you're lucky you'll get a gf that isn't batshit insane about it. My gf isn't attacking me over pronouns and she can take a joke about women being inferior. So it's a pretty sweet deal if you find someone similar.

Because he said people won't trust me.

:^(

If you're actually in a decent relationship with no kid, it should actually cost you less money than living alone. Having a wife is essentially having a roommate with benefits.

That's pretty neat user.
Step up, though.

i didn't say they wouldn't trust you, they just might not trust you as much and thats because you have nothing to lose really.

people, especially in professional and academic circles, look at family men way differently than they do single guys. Forbes (maybe Fortune?) magazine had a pretty good article on how married CEO's compare to non-married CEO's.

That's stupid, though. If anything I have everything to lose because my job is everything.


Normies are such retards.

I really don't get how people can start a family unless they have enough money saved up to secure a middle-class lifestyle forever. So several millions. The pressure to always make enough money and the fear of losing your job must be huge.

By being a supreme actor, by having charisma, by being enigmatic and not letting people know every detail of your life - all while seeming sociable and normal. It's very hard to pull off, but mastering this skill is worth it. I've noticed that people ridicule or disrespect you because of that only when you're trying to be someone you're not. This all is hard to put into words, but basically you have to options when trying to avoid negative perceptions as a bachelor: have supreme mental strength or be as pure as a monk.

What if I don't have the constitution for prolonged deception? Can I be am autismal pure monk?

The latter is too difficult to 'fake' as it would mean rewriting your entire personality, at least to my knowledge. I will speak honest: the only way to truly be free as people of our kind is to master deception. It took me long to get there, over 10 years, but these days I can be anything I want or need to be according to the situation. Others might call me edgy but you will understand: this thing with women is a curse for us and our incompatibility with them is a huge mark for people around us. They don't understand our dilemma and never will. You must learn to outmaneuver them, to overpower them or you will eternally be a laughingstock, "that poor little autist"! Strength is our only means of salvation.

i wish a brilliant male researcher/scientist would say this about me one day... thanks for being awesome, user.

I can't handle all these cheeses.

This. Notice how if not married, they're sometimes hermits or slobs. Gotta make sacrifices. Aktchually idk if that's a general case, but take Howard Hughes for instance.

this is one of the more autistic threads I've seen on Veeky Forums in a long time and that's saying a lot

Why is it autistic?

Because no normal person would ask such a question.

Honestly, the more I read and research, the more I think that marriage has a lot of benefit if you go with the right person.

no normal person would go out of their way to point out autistic people

The Marriage Meme:
>Fall in love
>Get married
>Have kids
>Wife starts turning into a hamplanet
>Constant arguing
>Cheats on you with Chad
>Divorce
>Cut your wealth in half
>Lose your kids
>Lonely, balding, and chubby at 40
>Realize you wasted all these years and could've been working on your career or other important aspects of your life

I agree with some points, but:

>not arranging a prenuptial agreement
>letting yourself go (ronery, balding, chubby)

>Many people had a miserable marriage so you will too!

>a man without a family isn't as trusted because he has no skin in the game.
This has always struck me as extremely obnoxious and borderline asinine. You don't need to have a wife and kids to have things you give a damn about, and there's still a penalty for failure.

>some people had a successful marriage so I will too!

>and there's still a penalty for failure.
the penalties are trivial when you are single. despite what Veeky Forums says, educated professionals are very much in demand. as long as you have a bachelors in STEM and a few years experience you can pretty much up and leave whenever you want and have very little problems finding a good job.

>Is there a correlation between having a lifetime partner and being successful researcher?
Not necessarily but there is definitely a correlation between success in research and having healthy relationships whether it be friends, lovers or family.

I'm talking in a more abstract sense than fluidity of employment, residence, or lifestyle.

But I guess that's a good point. Society prefers people who are trapped and will thus put up with shit environments and employers.

>I'm talking in a more abstract sense

i understand what you mean. I think its not so much that single guys are viewed as not caring or irresponsible, but they have an element of unpredictability to them that can make others feel insecure about their standing. ever have that guy friend who's personality did a 180 when he met "her"?

True, shit happens. It really depends on the person's age, and to a more limited extent, their apparent demeanor.

I suppose it isn't so unreasonable in a way. Although anyone who's in a career oriented field with any degree of investment can be pretty well assumed to be a low risk for bailing. At worst their performance temporarily suffers.

>not listening to frank

youtube.com/watch?v=xtS46Wfsxnw

It's a coin toss really. But it's not like you can't influence the outcome. If you keep yourself fit and expect the same from your wife, she is both less likely to turn into a hamplanet and cheat on you with chad.