>over at friend's house
>they're cooking dinner
>have to use all your might to stop yourself interfering with literally everything they're doing
"browning meat? what's that?"
"we should definitely get fresh tomatoes even though they are not in season and have no flavour and no colour"
this, in its simplicity, is much more plausible than other Veeky Forums tales of woe
>browning meat, you mean making sure it's not pink on the inside, right?
>mom's making cookies
>uses half of the recommended amount of butter
>"butter is too unhealthy"
>puts baking sheet on bottom rack
>cranks oven up 25 degrees hotter than the directions say
No, i have no idea why they burned and taste like shit.
>at friends house
>they're defrosting ground beef in sauce pan of water on the stove
WTF.jpeg
>adds a jar of pasta sauce to pan
Do you want to stay for dinner user? We're having spaghetti bolognese
>MFW
Turn 360 degrees and nope the fuck outta there
you can get decent tomatoes year-round thanks to canadas booming greenhouse industry, stick with smaller varieties like cherries or vine tomatoes that come in those plastic bins
I have a vegetarian friend who doesn't understand marinating or seasoning. She's always so freaked out when I have cookouts because "my food tastes so good" and "she can't believe it's vegetarian!".
Use salt, bitch.
>butter is too unhealthy
Tell her to use a meme oil like coconut oil. She'll be dumb enough to believe it's actually healthier and use the full amount of fat.
My buddie's mother always made veggies stew in a pressure cooker and left shit in there for like an hour.
Man I hated that mush. She was also one of these salt is bad for you people.
>She was also one of these salt is bad for you people.
Could you elaborate?
never added salt to anything because it's bad for you, something about gravy granules or was it cholesterol or blood pressure. idk i'm not a doctor.
a
w a t e r y
g r a v e
color doesnt have a u in it and flavor doesnt too retard
no, you flour it in seasoned flour(unless ground beat) put it on a high heat for a while to get some crispiness to it, it's mostly for texture but it's also got a subtle effect on the flavor similar to roasting veggies before using
I prefer that to the opposite. You can always add salt yourself, but most people use too much salt and you can't unfuck that.
salting at the table requires more salt to get the same effect as salting while cooking,
>mom cooking anything
>no salt
>half sugar
>half butter
>overcook for 15 minutes
>"these things are never as good as they look in the pictures"
Just follow the recipe, mum. They have no reason to lie to you.
I wish I had the time on holidays to just cook the meal myself.
I find that concept to be very wrong. When I salt shit afterwards it's just salty on the outside.
The food needs time to absorb it.
It does in Britland.
And I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be "doesn't either"
>English is not my first language
>English is not my first language
That appears to be the case for 90% of amerifats as well.
I was trying to act like somebody who doesn't understand cooking and says something horribly wrong, which is why I used greentext. I know what browning meat is, sorry for the confusion. Good explanation though!
It's the first language for 90% of europeans though, yurocuck
t. Never been to europe and couldn't distinguish between france and germany on a blank map.
You could have at least picked eastern europe, it's filled with unimportant tiny countries that 95% of americans couldn't name
>tiny countries amerifats can't name
No. I made it deliberately easy and still stand by the assertion that 90% couldn't identify the big ones.
france is the one that invaded poland right?
yes, I'm also very jealous of americans
Good. Now what century, you're not even required to identify the decade, did it happen? Now, look at a blank map and try to point out both countries without having your ears start expelling smoke.
20th
you're REALLY making this AmericCAN angry!
Amerifat education everybody!
???????????????
but user you retarded fuck poland was never invaded by france
>soviets
>france
>really angry
Why? You can't fix something when you don't recognize that there's a problem.
>france
>invading poland
the closest they got was with Napoleon and that was before Poland was actually a country
1806. Napolean invaded and defeated Poland in a matter of days, imbecile.
t. Amerifat sick of amerifats being stupid.
>poland
>existing in 1806
user pls
>Poland was actually a country
Prussia = Poland for all intents and purposes. Call it a day.
>Apache = America for all intents and purposes. call it a day
European history is generally not a mandatory class in america, because american history takes its place.
Who would fucking think that you learn more about where you live!? It's so dumb, right, everyone should learn what I do, fuck everything else!
>seashell painting = igloo building for all intents and purposes. Call it a day.
>early sea life = all humans for all intents and purposes. Call it a day
>shitposting = posting for all intents and purposes. Call it a day.
user I learned about some euro history in class especially when it comes to Napolean
I was just pointing out that the modern state of poland didn't actually exist back then
Fuck off amerinigger there is literally no history or culture in your "country" worth learning about.
There really is a special place in hell for people who give a shit about 'health' when making desserts.
the only useful thing europe has done is given birth to the united states.
>Have High Blood Pressure
>Salt will literally fucking kill me
HURR ITS JUST A MEME THO I SWEAR XDDDDDDDD t. (you)
>European history is generally not a mandatory class in america, because american history takes its place
Did your 'American history class' talked about the colonisation from America by the asians 12000 year ago? The native Americans ? The genocide of them? In wich perspective? From natives or the conquerors? Just curious, would love to see a amercant history schoolbook one day
this
My education is 30 years out of date from the current, but I did learn about all of those, though what happened millennia before the country was founded didn't get covered in that particular course for obvious reasons.
obviously if you're a fat faggot with one foot in the grave
salt is a meme if you're otherwise healthy