Just wanted to get some feedback on what you think of the overall message of the writing...

See, here's the problem with this guy
>I will only accept a certain kind of feedback, and you know what kind I am looking for. The insightful, not rude kind.
he just argues with anyone who tries to give him any feedback at all, then makes multiple new threads asking again.
I suggest we sage and report.

Did you read the whole thing to the very end, friend? I think I made some interesting points about not knowing exactly why you were doing something in the first place, and then going back and trying to reflect on why exactly you did the thing you did in the first place. Strangely enough I think I was able to capture the moment. The point of the writing wasn't simply to describe the mundane scenario, it was to describe the events surrounding the scenario which seemed bizarre and worthy of writing about. You seem to have missed the point.

My thread was spammed before, so those threads don't count. I only posted it once that day, and then I posted it again when I corrected some grammar and typos

Kill yourself.

>he just argues with anyone who tries to give him any feedback
I've received maybe one honest bit of feedback and it was nothing more than a pedantic critique of the word useage, no one has tried to grappled with the complex arguments going on behind it, besides that one person who said that it's actually akin to the Arab in Camus's The Stranger, to which I actually agree and feel proud to make that parallel.

Kill yourself.

It's endlessly embarrassing.

It reads like something an /r9k/ faggot who lives his life on the internet would write.

The writing's dreadful and the narrator (I assume his impotent self-aggrandizing is intentional and meant to be laughed at?) is obnoxious and sounds like a 14 year old edgy loser.

>pleb
>tumblr
>blog
>postmodern wish

It's just so very cringeworthy

It's very much non fiction and the narrator is me. Thanks asshole. I am sorry that you have cringed though, I hope I didn't do you too much harm.

The problem with having ideas is that nobody will take you seriously unless you can communicate those ideas in an interesting way. This is just a thing about people, we look for easy ways to filter people and ideas out, and prose is one of those ways. Work on your prose and people will argue with you about anything. The earlier you accept this, the better off you will do in life, even if you don't like it.

Kill yourself.

It's written very plainly, it shouldn't be a problem for you to read.

>the narrator is me

Go back to your anime and 'vidya', kid

Kill yourself.

kill yourself

Jejune, otiose, and but--what?

>>>
Kill yourself. Please. Just kill yourself.

Standard juvenile angst. Instead of obsessing over the moment, take a productive turn in your writing. How did you deal with the anger? All I'm reading here is that you sat around and felt defeated by it. Smash some plates. Dance like a dragon. Do something interesting. This is self-serving navel-gazing, which is fine if you keep it under wraps for yourself, but you can't expect any of us to turn around and say, 'whoa, this is groundbreaking stuff, user, stuff nobody has ever considered before.' Maybe you could impress some Twilight fans with your depth, but for everyone else, you're pissing in the shallow end of reflective thought. Keep practicing.

No, you didn't. Nothing you wrote was interesting.

And I feel it's often worth mentioning that when you project your internal philosophy onto the world, it's a result of these things lingering within you and remaining untackled. You write of the tedium of existence, and lo, your writing itself becomes tedious. Do you use your imagination proactively? Do you try to challenge yourself, and tackle your own fears? Do you direct yourself towards breaking the mould that you hate, or do you just contemplate it and despair of it? It sounds to me like the true source of this anger is probably frustration at yourself, with this episode in the chat-room as a proxy. Why are you looking for validation from us, and from these anons in a chatroom? Is running this website and writing these things for yourself not enough? Seeking pats on the head from the universe is an endless path to futility. Do these things for yourself and take pride in them; and if they still do not bring you satisfaction, find something that does.

I'm not looking for "pats on the head", or any praise or criticism really, I was hoping to just discuss the writing. You've said some interesting things, I suppose that frustration with myself could be the cause of my anger at the time, but I'm not sure beyond what I was able to write. You're right though, that it is rather equivocal. I do tackle the "tedium of existence". Every day I am writing, reading, and exploring works of art which I appreciate.

Kill yourself.

I just wished everybody would tell stories rather than write thoughts.

Thoughts are so, so boring. Tell a story. Create some characters. Make them do stuff. Make stuff happen to them. Make it beautiful.

Your thoughts will make it into the story. I promise.

I don't know anything about you, but try dropping yourself as far out of your comfort zone as you dare. Then you might take home some experiences worth writing about, even if whatever occurs is utter shit. You must strike a balance between reflection and active experience; to come across interesting and profound thoughts, I believe you must experience reality and see how your character can emerge through your interactions with it. Living in a mental vacuum and chasing echoes of habitual thought won't produce anything worthwhile. Feed your soul. Writers need to live most of all.

I didn't read the whole thing the first time, just went back and did though. I stand by my initial critique.

writting your thoughs and experiences tends to fall short in prose. poets get away with it due to the form.

a good writer doesn't slam his thoughs or ideologies over the head of the reader, as if he were bashing a non obediant mule. he carefully crafts a story that, not only engulfs the reader, making it impossible for him to stop reading, but in that story, exposes, sometimes more subtly, sometimes more brasantly, his thoughs and ideologies.

the best writters writte not only their ideology and ideas, but they self critique them, and find flaws in them, therefore growing along side the reader.

Also, being brazen, crass and nihilistic is so last century.

MOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDSSSSSS

Boring, juvenile, incomplete.

Reads like the typical drivel by a teenager who thinks he's "lazy but smart" and "people just don't get me".

Could be entertaining as sarcasm if you work on the choice of words that flow better.