"Hey bro, one homemade burger comin' right up!"

>"Hey bro, one homemade burger comin' right up!"
>serves you a giant meatball in a bun

Why can't people shape their burgers properly?

idk, pisses me off, too. and you can never criticize someone for this, because then

>Bro you're just used to those thin little McDonald's burgers. This is a REAL burger!

I mean yeah I'd still eat that burger, but it'd be better with about a half inch shaved off the top of the patty.

How fatty or lean the meat is will determine how it looks when it is cooked. That is why a guy that can cook a hamburger may or may not be able to cook a bison or lamb burger.
It's not stupidity, it's ignorance and a good opportunity for you to step in and show your bro whats up.

I squish the burger as much as possible put it still cooks into a meatball somebody halp!

I don't get how people fuck up this bad. Everyone knows you frequently press the burger w/ a spatula while it's cooking so it doesn't round up....but, it is and nobody knows how to cook anymore

quality bait

When shaping your patty, pinch the center of the burger thinner than the edges. I've seen this done a bunch of different ways, but mine works best I think. I pinch the center to a uniform thinnerness, out to about a half inch from the edge. About like, a quarter inch thinner. For some reason this helps the burger keep it's shape.

Form a hockey puck
Depress the center in a little bit
This prevents the edges from thinning out more than the middle

All they have to do is use a shaper like pic related.

take as much meat as you want and form it into a nice ball, use the bottom of a dinner plate and press it down onto the ball. the circle on the bottom of the plate makes it into a nice shape with a good edge

>Depress the center in a little bit
this right here is the way to go if you don't want your patty to get into a ball shape while it cooks

a...an omelette mould device?

They just don't have the right tools

Why do people eat "burgers?"

I'm triggered when a sandwich/burger is too big to take a bite of.

I guess I'm supposed to smash it down or unhinge my jaw like your mother.

>he can't unhinge his jaw

git gud bro

The problem occurs because even when you flatten it it tends to thicken and shrink in diameter.

...

>he still does it manually!

>when they put the hot burger directly on the bun
>by the time it gets to you the bottom piece is completely soggy and gross
LET THE FUCKING MEAT REST ON SOMETHING ELSE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>Make ball of meat
>Put it between two sheets of Plastic foil
>Grab something plane and big and smash ball
It should have the perfect patty shape
You need to rest it in the fridge for an hour after

You can easily fix that by making the patties into sort of a "red blood cell" shape. Make the middle of the patty thinner than the edges. Then as it shrinks when cooking it ends up flat rather than ball-shaped.

I always have a problem of the inside being raw af whenever I cook in pan on stove, despite cooking for 5 mins each side on med-med high heat. Do i need to drop heat lower or just be mor patient

Just cook them longer if it's still raw inside. How is that not obvious?

pan cooking burgers is always tough. a few solutions:
>make it thinner so it cooks full through
>baste with water and a lid for ~30 seconds after cooking both sides
>make a cut from the middle to a point at the edge and make note of how long it takes to cook
also let your pan heat up a fair amount before even putting it on the pan

The problem is that restaurants are no longer making food for eating as the primary purpose.

They're making food for trendy millennials to post pictures of it all over yelp and instagram