I've been on the toilet for 3 hours now. I had spaghetti last night. Does that make you constipated?

I've been on the toilet for 3 hours now. I had spaghetti last night. Does that make you constipated?
I'm supposed to be meeting my daughter for lunch I'm worried I'll miss it.

Why do you need to be on the toilet if nothing is happening? Put your pants on, power through, and go get lunch.

There's poop in my butt but it's stuck

Fella, I've done some pretty amazing things while having poop in my butt.

Suckig a turd from your own ass using a vacuum cleaner tube is not amazing.

> literally shit posting

Drink more water and eat more fiber you fat pig

my low sugar hot cocoa always makes me poop.

heat some milk and water in a saucepan, add some cocoa powder 16 ounces = 3 tablespoons of cocoa powder. then when it's hot, pour into a cup with aspartame.

You will poop in no time, cocoa powder has tons of fiber in it.

Thanks

>daughter
Your hand got pregnant and had a baby ?

drink coffee doofus

Put a marshmallow in your ass the sugar makes your bowels evacuate

Clean up and give up for now. Not much you can do and straining will make it worse.

Go buy some CHELATED magnesium (it can't be magnesium oxide or magnesium citrate). Magnesium Taurate, Magnesium Glycinate or something labeled "Chelated Magnesium" will work. Take 600 mg sometime after dinner time. Chelated magnesium acts as a mild laxative (not the shit your brains out Mg Citrate in real laxatives).

Also, drink chamomile tea, 1-2 cups at night. Plenty of scientific studies on PubMed showing it helps with constipation if your stuffed, and diarrhea if you have the opposite problem.

I take magnesium every evening and drink 1-2 cups of chamomile tea per day and haven't had a poopless morning but twice in the last year.

Eat lots of bran and drink lots of water.

Hot black coffee. It'll make you shit everything you haven't shat the past seven years.

yes

Youre allergic to wheat. Hippy

...

yes it is

I had my gallbladder removed in 2014, and haven't been constipated since. Take some hot black coffee, or something oily, that'll get the plumbing in good working order again.

This