>my wife is a great cook
Biggest lie. Women are terrible lazy cooks. They take every shortcut possible and don't give a fuck. I'm almost convinced they can't recognize good taste and technique any better than a 7 year old child. Yet they pretend to like cooking on Pinterest and Facebook when in all actuality its a failed vulva flapping contest about who has the best camera and the most friends. Women these days ruin everything they touch.
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t. mommy didn't love me
I am sorry you feel that way, OP
newfags don't recognize stale pasta.
This is actually painfully true.
I got into cooking last year, learned techniques and hope ingredients taste, etc. I used to think my mom was a pretty good cook, but holy shit
>never measures anything, usually puts way too much water in everything, and then uses corn starch to thicken things back up
>always tries to sub in random ingredients, like lettuce instead of kale, or whatever I can't think of any good examples
>spices are all preground and bought in huge quantities 5 years ago, still using them today
>overcooks pasta, eggs, beef, etc, cause she thinks rubber is best texture
>never seasons meat before cooking, because one time she did it and added a fuckton of salt and 'couldn't tell how much she was adding because it kept disappearing'
things like that, not a big deal individually but it adds up
Hmm._So Im not the only one.
my mom is a good cook, the only problem she has is that sometimes she makes recipes from a magazine or something that are obviously shitty. Like one time she made a baked mac and cheese with a pound of pasta and half a pound of cheese, but you really need like 3x that amount of cheese. The result was grainy macaroni
gf on the other hand is a retard. I've told this story before here but she once tried to make me kraft blue box by adding the milk, cheese packet, and butter to the water as the pasta was cooking. I don't make fun of her for it because I want her to learn but God damn was it hilarious
> I've met every woman, and guess what I've found out.
wtf! i hate your mom now!
dumb roastie
that's why we should force cute boys to dress up and cook
go back to your containment thread
*board
>have trap gf
Solves not only this problem but many more. Give in to the bp user.
The modern western woman is useless in every way.
>Christmas with grandma
>She takes some delicious meat out of the oven with onions and a tasty sauce
>Cuts it in a plate
>Nukes it in the microwave
Why?
Literally why?
It was fought and dry when she served that shit to me
this entire website is our containment area you stupid roastie
>The bait
OP never left his basement of frozen meals. Women are better at cooking than men, and im a male
make sure you do it right the first time user
It didn't used to be this way. I think it's pretty accurate with modern women though, unfortunately. So many are spoiled by convenient fast food options, frozen dinners, and so on. I'm a much better cook than my girlfriend who right now struggles to even understand the basics. At least she's trying though and I can guide her.
>>always tries to sub in random ingredients, like lettuce instead of kale, or whatever I can't think of any good examples
this is a BIG one in my experience
my gf does this all the time and I hate it because it makes everything taste "off"
most girls are proud of it too. "lol i cant cook"
>"lol i cant cook"
>"lol I'm not very tech savvy"
>"lol parallel parking is hard"
Men ar the best cooks. Here's a proof:
you're trying too hard, dicklet
...
i'm not a woman and parallel parking is still hard
>this thead again
At least you are getting a little more creative 5/10
NO IT ISN'T YOU CAN LITERALLY DO THE SAME THING EVERY TIME AND GET IT 100% RIGHT
now i heard the best way to shoot yourself with the intent to kill is to aim straight through the mouth so you can sever your brain stem
Let me give you some personal insight on the matter.
I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.
We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.
But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.
Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."
All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.
Do with this information what you will.
t. High school virgin
what makes women spoiled by fast food, etc. but not men? statistically men eat more fast food.
This pasta is pretty stale, even by Veeky Forums standards
kike
Not my fucking wife.. shes the shits.. she cooks like a mofo. from scratch most the time.. shes a good woman too..i love her.
A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts. When you get cleaned up, hug her, tell you you love her. It can do no harm
This is a comfy pasta
7/10
Women also have men who cook for them, or who at least buy all her meals.
They never have to "grow up" like a man does when he starts living alone, and eventually gets sick of feeding himself nothing but Hot Pockets and pizza rolls.
Old people tend to be really fascinated with microwaves, it was big time tech to them.
ITT: overgeneralizations based on confirmation bias
The first time my grandma used a microwave she threw a potato in there for 30 minutes.
...
You just want to buy into lowered expectations and bullshit. I will admit that there are not many people period that have a grasp of cooking in general and especially young women but there are passionate people.
My wife comes from generations of bakers and the technique and skill and fun of it is not lost. We might repeat a meal twice in a month if we really liked it and do most of our cooking on the fly and are never disappointed.
>tfw to beta too lay hands on a girl
If I hit them abusively will they have sex?
>"culinary school graduate" exgirlfriend is making eggs and bacon in the morning for me.
>threw a whole clove of garlic into the scrambled eggs while they were cooking
>somehow burnt one side of the bacon and undercooked the other side
>starts scrubbing at her cast iron pan with soap immediately off the heat
I've never been so triggered
there was probably a tiny spec of red on something and it freaked her great depression addled brain out
that's cute
Where the fuck did she think the salt went?
My girlfriend is an excellent cook whose mom had her own successful catering business
White women can't cook
It's true
But in all seriousness we can't let him get the nuclear codes
yeah cos her mother owns a catering business.. she is an exception not the norm
Is this a copypasta? Swear I've seen this before.