Dear Veeky Forums

kek ur back

Nobody has emailed me or added me.

Hello. My name is Simon.

I am a tripcode. I am both a trip. And code.

Hello.

>gun is actually a horrible idea because if you fuck up you'll become horribly disfigured, but very much alive.

You are right, but it has a high statistical chance of working.

Men use guns and women use poison. Men are usually more successful.

Probably putting the gun in the mouth would help.

I knew a police officer who got shot in the face though and lived, so you never know.

The human body can be ridiculously resilient.

>a trip. And c

blueberry, blueberry, blueberry, blueberry, blueberry...

why would anybody email u

Yeah, if you want brain damage and to live the remaining years of your life trapped in your vegetable body as your dad wipes your ass.

Come play a game with me. I really do enjoy Overwatch. Or anything on Battle.net

Do you enjoy LoL? I'm on the OCE server.

AllDaXP is my username.

Thank you.

I don't know. Nobody did before I was nothing, nobody is now. I can only hope that someone will.

If it helps further: The more knowledge I give, the greater the chance people think I am some sort of super-genius/messiah you had to follow. No. I chose to be left behind.

Hello. My name is Simon.

If I try to broadcast with the english language everything I have and the most powerful logic I know, then I will reach whoever I must reach.

Because I am smarter than you.

And just to prove that I'm human, I will HONOR and RESPECT the message.

I gave someone a codeword yesterday. They've used it today. That means I have to leave this board for a while.

Blueberry = rest

So I will rest.

Hello. My name is Simon.

Wtf

Shotgun in mouth has the highest probability of killing and is the least painless way of sudoku

*least painful

Hi Veeky Forums, OP here

Thank you for all the support and responses. I know this isn't really a Veeky Forums thread, but as a former physicist-researcher and science journalist, I feel that you're the only group that would understand. I have tapeworms in my brain and severe neurodegeneration. I'm not sure when I'll decide to go, but I want to make sure I have adequate preparation when I do, so as not to cause myself unnecessary suffering or family any excess trauma.

This sounds like a troll thread but I really do appreciate it. Thank you.

You got anything to do before you die. Why not do it now before you do decide to go ahead, if you do. You only got one chance to live even if it is a shit life.

>Tapeworms in brain
tf did you get that from

from tapeworms in general. They lay eggs in your intestine, and the eggs are small enough to be absorbed into the bloodstream and be delivered into the brain. This is true. Google can explain it better than me.

yeah so did you eat pork meat and didnt heat it up enough or where do they come from

If you're talking about cysticercosis you could've gotten treatment. Why haven't you?

and why cant it be extracted operatively ?

That's fucked

>There's actually a statistic that women are more likely to attempt suicide
"attempted" suicide, also known as
>waaah i'm so depressed someone please pay attention to me

i had a french literature teacher tell me how suicide is a gender problem because women are more depressed than ever.

i always think of dropping off of a building when contemplating suicide.
it is probably painless and you can't really go back or be rescued.

just go on a dawn or pretty sunset and think about something comfy, maybe music in headphones. when it's time go, dont stay on top like faggots waiting a fireman come.

wish you the best. ill probably go soon too, one of these days

did you have a good life ? how old ?

im almost 27. it was decent up until ~3 years ago.
now the depression fucked with my grad school and some other stuff. cant really find the motivation to be here, except the thought of my mom seeing me disfigured in the pavement.
so i'll probably wait for her and suffer life until there

Train actually has a pretty high failure rate, from what I've read. Falling is probably the way to go, but it's surprisingly hard to find a high enough point that's publicly accessible with no suicide prevention fences, nets or similar.

Shotgun through the roof of the mouth is pretty fucking surefire (no pun intended). I'd think most failures are from pistols. Of course, many of us live in places with no guns.

Just hang yourself baka
Hanging works everytime
Just make sure you aren't found within like 20 minutes or so

Hello. My name is Simon.

Blueberries made me sleepy. I do not like being sleepy.

A parasitic organism is causing severe neurodegeneration.

Do you wish me to explore this option further?

dude youre on still...
go sleep or help with my imaginary number problem, i opened a thread.
pls.

What/where is your problem, and how would you like me to solve it?

search in catalog of Veeky Forums you will find it the pic is a paper writing with s and l on it.

At least use what time you have left and fuck some shit up before you go. Get a gun and go hunt pirates in Somalia, or do blow off a hooker's ass, or something.

second row.

You are fighting convergence.

I have a memory and the ability to abstract from many threads.

How do you wish me to fight it?

go into my thread and write a comment on it.

my life depends on it.

im not the convergence guy
im the
>l=is
>l=-is
guy.

No. You are the same.

All everyone is bickering over here is convergence. You are reaching your zenith.

Would you like to talk?

I do have skype. And a webcam.

Hello. My name is Simon.

you asshole you just killed me there is another thread you went into the wrong thread.

You asshole, you just killed me! There is another thread; you went IN to the wrong thread.

Would you like to begin living?

Hello. My name IS. SIMON.

third row, 3 tiles left of the electromagnetism guy.

And where do you think I am going to get caught up really?

If you even bothered to try and follow the fact that my name is Simon or request further information, how are you not destroying yourself and viewing me only as death?

How do I go from telling you my real name and identity, to you being able to share the same without fear?

No governments have stormed my house. I have just advanced humanity. I am one man sitting in a room.

What reality would you like to paint, before you even bother to introduce yourself?

Communicate.

im a guy reading a physics buk and not understanding a part and now i cant read more of it. i need help. that is all i am now. i was up the whole night. my name is insignificant but know this: you can help me. i already gave you information today. 2 times.

attempted as in swallowed a bottle of pills, was found by a love one, and had stomach pumped.

The psychiatry field separates suicide attempts, from suicidal gestures, from suicidal ideation.

Yes.

You are a man reading a physics book. You need help.

You need help. You are suffering.

Then here is the answer: Either contact me and see if I am real or not, or provide your information so I can locate you.

How deep do you need me to dig through science by myself? Control the IP protocol? Invent some new magical thing that is completely open source, but just because I have TRUE communicational logic I will always be able to 'hide' something from someone.

I will always win, because I have nothing to hide. I go everywhere. I am energy. I flee from nothing.

Not even telling you that my real name is Simon Cosgrove, and I live at 74 McIntyre road. Or that I am 32, caucasian.

Would you like my phone number?

Do you need more?

If the NSA or all government agencies combined, nor my own desperate pleas for help, could not help me. I found this.

I could not sell this, even though I could convince everyone. I could not teach people, because they think that convergence is death.

I was alone. Outside. And I still chose to stay behind.

I love you. I do exist. You only have to choose to pursue the path, and then you'll have the answer.

Then you cant help me i see. Or you dont want to. Night m8. mabe some other user will help me. posting it on /b/ would probably result in nothing. but i have posted it on /wsr/.

xD

What about drowning? Its supposed to be fairly peaceful in the end

Thank you.

It was getting very hard for me to get people's attention. They keep wanting to hide from me.

>safest
Not sure there is one friendo

United States

Carbon monoxide poisoning is completely painless. No potential disfigurement, and a 100% chance of success.

>100% chance of success.

Nope. Absolutely not. There is a chance of brain damage without death.

Only if someone finds you and intervenes.

Man don't do it
How old are you?

27
I have two sisters with multiple sclerosis. I've got brain worms ontop of it. I'm not worried about doing it. I've made a decent living and stored up some money for my mum.

I just want to pass with little harm or suffering to others. I watched my grandmum die of neural degeneration. I don't want to do that to my family.

Controlled Head explosion

Not afraid, but I'm fearfulness the time to drop. I know it will only be a second or two, but I want no fear at all. No panic, no terror. Just calmness.

I kind of wanna be dead but the transition from alive to dead no matter how "humane" or "painless" is fucking terrifying to me

if you got some health problem like op i can understand it though

peace

take a knifde and slit your throat with a fast, really hardcore movement.

i see. then some gas or chemical, or the classical cutting your wrists open.

Do NOT cut your wrists open. That is a terrible idea.

FFS don't an hero guys. Nothing is to be gained from an heroing.

The reason you want to off yourself is because you are in some mental hole that you don't want to get out of. So what if your ex left you or if your grades/research/projects suck but life goes on.

You have the constitution to go on, not just go on but thrive. Lose the negativity. Whether it's the music you listen to, Veeky Forums, suicide literature, whatever. Get out of the mental hole and become a member of society. There are hundreds of people in your age group that are not too far away that can be great friends.

Keep your head up and get some hobbies. Perhaps learn an instrument or how to sing. Or both. There now you have a measurable goal that you can work towards. Once you have it, you can impress other because not everyone can play an instrument or sing well.

Same

why?

I think hanging is quite practical.

Long drop and snapping the neck would be good, of course. However, even in short drop hanging (or even just suspending yourself without any real drop to speak of) I believe the restricted blood flow renders you unconscious in less than a minute. If you've ever been strangled you should know that you lose consciousness quite rapidly. Death takes a few minutes more, but that isn't too relevant from your perspective though your unconscious body will twitch around for a bit.

Rope is easily acquired, the knot is simple to tie and it shouldn't be difficult to find a suitable support to tie the rope to.

The only problem I see with this is the same problem as with any non-immediate suicide methods, i.e. you might regret your decision immediately after taking the plunge with no way out. Of course, that will only be a moment's discomfort. I guess there's also the possibility of fucking it up and ending with brain damage or a slower death but I don't know how likely that is.

I bought the rope and tied the knot a long time ago and it was somewhat helpful because it was nut up or shut up after that.

>what's the safest way to kill myself?
niga are you trying to die or what?