5 page essay due on the 5th

>5 page essay due on the 5th.
>got a shitty fuckin' outline that I'm expanding and an approximate 1500 word goal
>am making slow steady mildly motivated progress.

Who else tryin' to make it?

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unless its supposed to be super technical and contributive to discourse, you can easily knock that out over two nights, one spent on composition and the other on substantive revision/clarification.

you got this. youve already discovered the beautiful skeleton that is outline.

jesus christ, that is a guaranteed night-before project for me, unless my self-esteem really hinges on doing well in the class. i can't remember the last time I did a substantial amount of work on a project more than 3 days before its due date. i should kill myself

>suicidal
>low self-esteem.
>unmotivated.

Listen to me, faggot, this is what you're gonna do for the 7 days.

#1 - GET A CALENDAR
>go to this page
timeanddate.com/calendar/monthly.html?year=2016&month=11&country=1
>print the calendar
"wah! no printer access"
>turn on some music
>copy the calendar on to some loose paper in your house.

#2 - DAILY WALKS.
>Walk around two blocks in your neighborhood every day. I know the prospect of other people seeing you outdoors is scary as fuck. Just get over it, and repeat.
>You don't need to run. You don't need to go for excessive time or distance. Just two blocks around your neighborhood in a big circle.

#3 - GET A REAL GOAL.
If your a writer dedicate your self to Nanowrimo.
If you have no particular aspiration at all. Learn spanish on duolingo.com right now, and keep at it for the next 30 days.

whats the calendar for?

I knocked out a 2000 word research paper in one day yesterday (no prior outline, no prior complete reading of sources). Granted, it's not a paper I'm proud of, but 4 days for 1500 words is nothing.

Send me your shit when you're done with the rough draft and I can help you edit it. No worries, I have the credentials.

three drafts is the way to go. Don't waste time with an outline, at least imo. But if you're not writing three drafts you're leaving some sweet gpa points and teacher love on the table

>tfw once again being tasked with writing a sprawling fucking full-year MA thesis-esque paper that has nothing to do with my intellectual purview, my field, etc.
>tfw it's completely luck of the draw what you get to do because you're locked into whatever that year's departmental offering of courses is for your subspecialty
>tfw this year might as well be NEO-SHINTO PHILOSOPHY AMONG THE SUBALTERNS OF POSTCOLONIAL BERMUDA: CARIBBEAN ENCOUNTERS AND INTERPRETATIONS WITH GUY FIERI'S OUEVRE for all the relation it has to what i want to do
>all but forced to write a guy fieri bermuda buttfuck paper

WHY DO DEPARTMENTS DO THIS

THEY KEEP HARPING ON YOU ABOUT HOW SHITTY EVERYTHING IS NOWADAYS AND HOW YOU CAN'T LOUNGE AROUND AND SPEND 10 YEARS IN DOCTORAL STUDIES ANYMORE BECAUSE YOU'VE GOTTA GO GO GO GO AND PUBLISH ASAP MOTHERFUCKER, OH BUT BY THE WAY, PLEASE WRITE ELEVEN PAPERS ON LITHUANIAN LITERARY PERSPECFTIVES ON JACK KEROUAC'S ANAL FISSURES

SEND ME INTO THE FUCKING TEUTOBURG WITH A PEN AND 825 LEGAL PADS AND I'LL FUCKING EMERGE IN 7 MONTHS WITH A DISSERTATION, PLEASE, ANYTHING BUT MORE OF THIS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Is it really this bad? Should I bother trying to get to where you are now?