ITT: Post stuff you actually made

ITT: Post stuff you actually made.
Homemade Tomato Soup and Grilled Cheese

That soup looks dreadful

That grilled cheese looks awful

Looks pretty yummy to me! I think the soup needs an herb, but other than that? Looks creamy, little bit still chunky, and the bread looks nicely crusty.

Protip: do your grilled cheese at a lower temp for longer, and you'll get a more even solid golden crisp side of it all. When it's dark in the middle like that, it was a little bit of butter browning versus deeper toasting the encompasses the bread crust a bit too.

I'd eat it

The soup had Herbs de Provence in it. It was certainly more chunky that I would have liked, but I don't have and immersion blender.

For the sandwich, I used mayo instead of butter. I liked it a lot better.

I hurt myself today

Are you an underground pro wrestler?

once upon a time

it was a fun hobby, but I started to see how seriously some people took it and I realized it was super gay and moved on

Translation: Vince didn't call. Sorry, bro.

...

nah man, I was getting chewed out by some fag after I did a show with him and didn't want to do it again, went through a table and he was flipping "you guys came, used my shit, and completely dicked me over"
bruh, you want me to give you the $12 for a new piece of drywall to replace your table? fuck off


I don't need that shit

kung pao chicken

I made a thing

kung pao calamari

sandwich

calamari linguine

Steak

Burger

a cheeser (thanks for cheesing with me guy)

chicken w/ pesto penne

...

thanks for cheesing.

Snowman

Pro chef here, get ready for...

Stuff I make when I'm bored.

Exhibit A: A deep fried something with a new potato head and balsamic eyes. I name most things Jim....so it's probably Jim.

Put that produce back in your mom's fridge before you get caught.

Snowman 2 ways

This is apparently a cock shaped carrot. I guess nature made this, but whatever.

I like it. Looks like a Bob to me though or maybe a Jimmy, not a Jim though.

Here is some kraft dinner.

That one isn't a Jim, that's a Johnson.

My catering prowess improved as Christmas drew in. I had mastered making Jims, using mashed potato as my material.

I named this guy Liwi

Earlier on in the year I had discovered spring onions make the 7-up dude.

chapawgne and ice

Pizza with pesto base, sauteed chanterelles and onion, thick-cut pepperred bacon, and mozzarella.

Here's chiphenge. Kinda self explanatory.

I proved to everyone I was an oldfag on this day

This beer

Though he was clearly smoking the erb, the kitchen staff still questioned if he was a cop...

Chanterelle risotto

And when asked if it wanted to cook the pig head, our oven was pretty clear with its answer.

Of course, I'm capable of fine dining bakery.

Or pissing waitresses off by giving them ala carte chip butties made out of soup rolls...

Or sneaking into the shop front of our local supplier to rearrange his plastic foliage...

if you don't lace your joints with ghost pepper powder from the sonarian spice company you are doing joints wrong.

...But occasionally I do make things.

Honestly.

poached some pears today in red wine, sugar and baking spices. good shit

Deconstructed krab rangoon

Looks ok


I'm making a seasoned pan.


My first cast iron to be in factly.

enjoy you're salmonella

No offense dude but the way you post makes me want you to die

shameless plug of my burmese:

Roast brisket with sweet corn, aioli, cabernet barbecue sauce and olive oil confit heirloom tomatoes.

...

I shot and cooked this duck today

rate mine

Hey you're right, I can see the bullet there.

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asparagus looks a bit under-cooked. otherwise this looks fantastic

ramen

Man are you finished masturbating? There is a chance that you are not as funny/witty as you think you are. It is embarrassing.

>stuff you actually made
>homemade tomato soup
No shit it was homemade

behold the wonder of the modern age that is gourmet home cooking!

i can't im too famous now

...

Ironically, you picked different posters.

You did manage to pick the 10 I uploaded though.
Why you heff to be mad? Is only small joke.

might be ok with better plates
also garnish? a lot of brown here, remember garnish can be a component it doesn't have to just me some chopped parsely. a swoosh of cream in that soup would do wonders
jesus christ
would smash hung over tho 2/10 would eat
im not above this but ill take the opportunity to remind you that even a high quality homemade bagel pizza is cheaper and ultimately less frustrating
like seriously a bag of bagels, a can of tomato sauce, fresh basil and mozz is probably cheaper than that bag
plating needs work, knife skills need work, rice is sad, personally I think a dish like this would benifit from a little deconstruction for serious service (plate the veg and chicken seperately, still on top of the rice even) but i'm sure it tastes pretty good as is
also i don't think kung pow chicken really needs celery but that's on you
this one looks much greasier and my comments are otherwise mostly the same, it doesn't look like you sweated the onions enough and the calamari neeeeds color. looks rubbery. i know you aren't exactly breaking down squid but you should consider it, the pink is appealing especially when properly seared and they just taste so much better.
don't take pictures of food on paper plates. take it on a cutting board at least, it is immediatly off putting. sandwich looks tasty but the bun could probably use a toast, chips look ok can't really tell without trying them. personally I am offended by LTO's below proteins on a sandwich but maybe that's my own neuroses. more turkey, slice it cleaner and put it on the bun a little neater.
mushrooms look barely cooked, and the calamari again looks rubbery and pretty gross. knife skills still need work, i have suspicions about the flavor being a little bland here but it is hard to tell

pilaf looks sad, onions are sad, practically raw, mushrooms look under, steak looks good but you didn't rest it properly, broccoli looks boring and asparagus looks gross. broccoli you can get away with a steam and a toss in some flavored oil (which i would suggest), but are better roasted, but asparagus NEEDS color or its just stupid. remember that roasting creates flavor and char, while bitter, reduces bitter from greens. plating is both messy and boring, and i think you needed a sauce
not really worth commenting on, although i really want some onion rings now. same obnoxious comment about LTO's below proteins but I'll add that I don't actually see a tomato or any equivelent, and your buns need a toast. probably tastes fine but why take a picture on a paper plate? its just silly.
what
those carrots are trash, your greens look boring and flavorless, on the other hand your pasta is a little overboard. shitty plating, chicken looks ok but i'd like it sliced. chop your rosemary, buy better carrots, learn how to cook carrots (COLOR), take better pictures.
where do i begin...
well first of all, you like many here need to learn how to edit your pictures. this is just obnoxious.
potatoes looks like wallpaper paste, turkey probably tastes good but way too much sauce, improperly cut. those look like canned green beans (literally why) and i think you tried to save them by adding bacon and onion but then neglected to actually saute them all together (or at all), canned cranberry sauce is a weakness of mine so i wont comment there but that roll looks dreadfull and I have absolutely no idea what is going on in the back of the plate, it looks like my shit after a weak long brisket and vodka bender.
i can tell this was thanksgiving and you just wanted to load up a plate but there was literally no actual plating involved here, its just a mess.
the turkey does genuinley look pretty good though. but fuck this is a mess.

mixture of ok knife skills and why did you not chop that
i can't actually see the ramen, there is too much in this bowl i think , i would say a third of everything maybe and even that might be too much.
i don't know what the meat looking crap is, nor the thing in the center. this is hard to judge just from the pure overload of ingredients but you might be on the right track, maybe.
is that cheese?
what
why is there cheese on the asparagus
why did you blanch asparagus and not finish cooking it
why are there two types of pasta on the plate
is there a steak hiding in there? whats that thing on top
this is like three dishes, and its so blurry i can't really judge anything
why post something like this
i can't see anything, another blur. learn to take photos! its too bad because this one actually sounds pretty good
risotto isn't creamy enough, and i think a bowl was the wrong choice for presentation. too many chanterelles for the rice and they look unsliced, i would have chopped some finely for the risotto and then sauteed some to put on top. this just looks like mushroom pilaf with arborio. needs another component, can you get ramps? because those would be perfect.
did you reduce the wine? because they look winey
looks good! i would play with the saucing but the overall plating looks pretty good. brisket looks nice, maybe cut a little thick but maybe that's what you were going for. i feel like eating this i would want more of the tomato
personally i don't like flower garnishes that don't add anything but the color is nice so ya
skin needed a longer sear
rate what
i'm not sure what this is, is that pepper? is this a savory dish?
the ramen looks under, and its all a little blurry to really tell about anything. kind of a mess, and i'm not sure how you planned on eating some of this with chopsticks.

OK

i don't like your knife skills, and your plating is kind of stupid. is this a soup or a sauce? too much if its sauce, extremely odd plating if its a soup. putting the potatoes in a pile would have honestly been more composed than the little circle thing you have going on. there is nothing gourmet about this.

just made and ate this salad:
bacon wrapped mini bell peppers stuffed with goats cheese, avocado, roasted cherry tomatoes, lettuce and a honey apple dressing

congratulations, you might be the only one in this thread who can properly take a picture of food.
toast the english muffin, hell fry it in butter, get better at cooking eggs, and add a few components, this is missing something

Salmon on the barbeque
bacon onion garlic collards
and steamed rice

i just cook im no presenter

Curried Lentils & Basmati Rice.

>honey apple dressing
Elaborate

S E R R A T E D
E
R
R
A
T
E
D

i think the bacon wrapped peppers could have used a little more cookin, and pretty much every chef i've ever had would tell me there's too much food on the plate, but this looks pretty fucking good.
salmon looks great, maybe a touch over (just a touch), i think steamed rice is boring but what are you going to do. collard greens could use a chiffonade and your camera needs a white balance.
i have a hard time judging lentils because i don't like them, from what i see of the rice it looks fine though. i would have tried to do something with the parsley but thats me.

OK

I enjoy squash noods.

My cheap phone camera is awful the salmon actually ended up perfectly crisp and just cooked enough on the inside. Brb looking up chiffonade

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Why chiffonade the greens?so they cook faster?

>cooked it

Liar.

they look better, and taste less bitter. if you're using canned collard greens obviously its not worth it but it definitely is if you're getting it fresh. you're also giving the greens some consistency.

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hospital food/10

How do you get the outside so dark and the inside so rare? By the time I get a good enough crust, I'm already at a medium-well.

Mom, is that you?

It's the "Oh my god Chorizo is so gross but so delicious" scramble.

6 oz Chorizo
2 JalapeƱo Peppers
1 Large Red Bell Pepper
1 Onion
2 Eggs
Cilantro

Cook your Chorizo first and get as much liquid out of that thing as possible. Remove meat and then cook onions until they're soft and translucent. Throw in peppers. Reintroduce Chorizo, finish with two eggs and garnish with Cilantro.

The Chorizo I bought was so fatty but the end result was still delicious and meaty. Serve it as a burrito filling or with Rice. Ideally Cheese could have absolutely sealed the deal but mine came out way too fatty to consider adding more fat to the thing. Dicing the onion might have been a better idea, but I like long strips of onion.

Your heat is too low. Get a really thick heavy pan (not nonstick). Heat the fuck out of it on a strong flame.

Gaylan?

Beef stew and garlic bread.

Stew cooked in Dutch oven all day. Garlic bread not strong enough: used store bought garlic butter.

You really should reconsider how you're incorporating your eggs, famalam. That looks pretty gross. Scramble your eggs separately. There's too much liquid in that pan for a decent scramble.

Fair critique. I wanted to be a lazy fuck and just use one pan. Cooking them separately would make it look less like puke.

It still was fucking delicious and looked better under the tortilla. I just saw how ugly it was and knew Veeky Forums would enjoy it.

I don't have a pic yet but I got a fresh chuck roast that a friend raised and slaughtered, I pan seared it in cat iron and with fresh black pepper and salt... then placed some lagre onion chunks in bottom of crock pot, babby carrots on top of those amd placed the meat right on top of all that, halved mushrooms and a few grilled onions on top of that and about a cup of beef broth the meat isn't submerged... gonna add potatoes later

>I pan seared it in cat
kek

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>there is nothing gourmet about this
That's the joke :3

oops