New roommate

>be op
>ask my roomate if i can make coffee
>rubs his fingers through my hair
>uhhh ugh ooo uuunnngh!
>he unloads in my mouth and i suck the remaining semen off his now flaccid penis
>yeah sure, whats your favorite starbucks coffee?

I think you're the moron here my man.

That didn't happen but I'm okay if you want to fantasize about it.

>If he brought pungent Indian food into the room id be fucking pissed.
Coffee is literally the least offensive smell on earth, it's why perfume makers use coffee beans as a "palate cleanser" when they're smelling things.

And if you ask somebody "do you mind if I [x]" you're giving them the chance to say yes. It's an incredibly submissive way to act. Try acting like a man.

Only get Starbucks at the original place in Seattle, and even then at most it's just ok.

>n-no you're a poopie head!

Yep, confirmed retard

Wrong, I've known people who can't stand coffee. Not everything can be determined objectively like your autistic mind thinks.

Stop embarrassing yourself bro. Just stop posting.

so the story ends with you asking him what his favorite thing to get at starbucks is? pretty lame anecdote, bro

>doesn't know how greentext works
Newfag detected.

You used fucking quotation marks with a tool built for quoting. You're a fucking moron.

>Wrong, I've known people who can't stand coffee. Not everything can be determined objectively like your autistic mind thinks.
You're getting caught in the semantics and missing the point.

Grow some balls and do what you want in your home.

>Hey I'm making coffee.
>Oh I really don't like coffee.
>You don't need to drink any, and I wasn't offering.
>But I don't like the smell of it.
>Too bad.

>trying to deny your a cocksucking faggot

Actually it is you the one who doesn't know how greentext works

nah it's just that when you put a line break between dialogue it implies a different person is talking

also not sure why you felt the need to use quotation marks when greentext literally is quoting but whatevs

Lurk more you fucking idiots. What I did is how you write the dialogue of another person. That's how most people do it here. Don't fucking reply to me again lest I lose even more brain cells from your absolute retardation.

so what did he say his favorite thing at starbucks is after you asked? seems like there should be more to this story

MOREOVER, greentext is used to quote people you are directly talking to, NOT to quote people who are not present in the thread. Learn the convention or get the fuck out. Fuck you've made me really upset.

You're as dense as a neutron star, buddy.

>upset because there isnt a dick in your mouth, yet

Give me yours, faggot. I'll gladly take it in my mouth so I can fucking bite it off, anything to cause you agony.

>I'll gladly take it in my mouth
kek I'm sure you would

>Ill gladly take it my mouth!
OPs mantra

faggot

>I'll gladly take it in my mouth
I'll bet OP

>you ask if it's cool to make coffee
>he says yeah, i love coffee
>he asks you what you enjoy when going to a coffee shop

dude why are you triggered over this

also, the answer is cafe mocha.

Indian food smells delicious though. Not even pajeet here

>asking "do you mind if i make coffee"
>not asking "i'm making coffe, you want any"

neck yourself you pemavirgin.

>I'll gladly take it in my mouth
you're the faggot here, buddy.

>coffeepleb gets mad when a fellow coffeepleb asks him a typical coffeepleb question
Kill yourself sweetie.

You guys should have seen his first post. He posted the same thing, just fucked the greentext up a little more. I'm surprised you gave him this many (You)'s. Nice work.

What are you?

...

Good thread.

...

>I'll gladly take it in my mouth
Great thread actually

It's not. The break in the sentence implies it was your turn to talk. You should have just kept it all in one line.

>be me
>post anecdote
>say what someone else said without differentiating dialogue from narrative
>dialogue is that of someone else's who isn't here on the thread

I see this all the time. Just worried you're going to teach people a rule that isn't really so solid.

>"No haha I love coffe
>"What's your favorite thing to get at Starbucks?"

is one person in two paragraphs, but once the quotes get removed (which OP didn't), there's no formal way for greentext to distinguish between paragraph breaks for their own sake and those which denote a change in speaker.

Corpata! :3

This, if you pay rent you can cook whatever the fuck you want

>new room mate
>first morning together
>hey dude want a cup of coff-
>DON'T TALK TO ME BEFORE I'VE HAD MY FIRST CUP!

This is such a hostile thread.

At what point did you two faggots start blowing each other?

And do you have pics?

>You used fucking quotation marks with a tool built for quoting. You're a fucking moron.
>he thinks green text is for quoting

>tl:dr OP sucks dick and expects others to care

new faggot

The is the best thread I have ever seen on ck thank you op

>not making effort to live harmoniously with your room-mates
autism

honestly it's pure cringe how many newfags in this thread don't understand how to greentext dialogue between you and another person properly

OP I think you're a real nice fellow, being considerate of others is a good thing. The smell of coffee, ok yeah you probably shouldn't ask your roomate's permission unless you're a submissive beta cuck, but hey day lived lesson learned

>Coffee
>Strong smelling

So you're basically fucked if you want to make dashi. or anything that involves braising.

>not just making some coffee and telling your roommate "Hey dude get a load of this shit im making: THE BEST COFFEE YOULL EVER TASTE"

if this person says "i-i dont coffee because flavor/gets me sick in the stomach/whatever cuck excuse", then you say DUDE THIS IS LITERALLY MEDICINE, I USED TO HAVE A BURNING STOMACH WHEN I DRANK INSTANT GARBAGE, NOW IM CURED AND GROWING STRONGER AFTER REAL COFFEE.

i have converted all my friends to real coffee.

literally no one in the world thinks coffee smells bad, not even non drinkers. i think you may be mentlly ill, OP.

>giving a shit

omg someone cap this shit, OP is a legend

>using my french press to make coffee for multiple people
>my brother has a french press, doesn't know anything about coffee though
>mocks me when I weigh beans and water
>"wtf lol just use a measuring cup"
>mocks me when I grind the beans
>"lol I just buy pre ground it's no different"
>mocks me when I use filtered water instead of tap water because the tap water tastes like trash
>"lol dude you're not gonna be able to taste the tap water after boiling it and adding coffee"
>mocks me when I use my variable temperature kettle to get a certain temperature
>"lol dude it's just boiling water"
>mocks me when I set a timer for steeping
>"lol why are you doing that I just let it sit for anywhere between 4 and 7 minutes"
>legit laughs when he sees me checking the timer for whatever fucking reason
>"lol don't let it go 1 second past 4 min the coffee will be ruined!!!" (sarcastic of course)
>mocks me when I use a wooden spoon to stir rather than a metal one because it's longer and there is no risk of cracking the glass pot
>"lol it's not gonna break dude people use metal silverware on glass plates all the time"
>mocks me when I preheat the mugs and press with hot water
>"lol dude the cold mugs won't change the temperature"
>mocks me when I start cleaning the press after finishing my coffee
>"lol you don't have to do that right now just leave it dude"

can't even imagine what would have went down had he watched me use my v60

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veeky Forums

Are you a coffee hipster?

How about you stop being autistic and just say "I rarely drink Starbucks because X. That's why I make my own"

>have egg cooker
>roomie falls in love with it
>watch him cook and eat an entire 18 egg carton

s-settle down, friend

Except he doesn't pay rent. He pays half the rent, at most. Maybe even a third, if he had two roommates.
Who says he gets to funk up the entire place with his shitty burnt bean water?

>being such a passive aggressive little shit that you don't say that you don't drink shit from starbucks

unless of course you're a woman

you have no idea what he said after he was asked

get the fuck off Veeky Forums you dumb retarded pieces of shit

fuck you shiteater

yes, that would be a good place to start

It's coffee, not mustard gas you fag

>your daily reminder OP of this thread is king of the cocksuckers

Starbucks smells like coffee, if he can stand that he can stand someone making it around him

Is your beef that he patronizes Starbucks? That just makes him a white girl

>he needs permission to make a cup of coffee

Maybe you should stick to juice boxes kid

This thread is our autism

Pure*

haha yeah normies am i rite guys

he probably had a macbook le updoot reddit haha

please respond

>blowing each other
>implying OP ever gets his dick stimulated and can't cum from pleasing other men alone

dumb retarded piece of shit

>You a fuckin' qweah? Fuck yourself. Charbucks got nothin' on Dunkin', guy.

People who complain about the smell of coffee are a scourge.
It's a fucking berry not a fish.

>family gets to the order counter before you
>they all order venti frappachinos with a million modifiers after changing their minds multiple times
>you just want a an iced coffe

t. starbucks drinking nigger

holy shit your brother sounds exactly like my parents, my condolences user

Having roomates is terrible.

>daily reminder op is a faggot

shut the fuck up fag

>moeshit garbage

literally kill yourself