Welcome to the Veeky Forums challenge: Monthly edition: Thread 2!

Welcome to the Veeky Forums challenge: Monthly edition: Thread 2!

The theme is announced on the 1st of every month, and submissions are welcome all month!


SCORING GUIDELINES

We recommend an 'Iron Chef' style scoring system. This means you, the people of Veeky Forums, will judge each entry individually instead of deciding on what you feel is the "best" dish.

Dishes are scored out of a total 20 points, based on 4 categories (worth a maximum of 5 points each); Presentation, Originality, Appeal and Challenge Goals. You may award 0's if you feel the contestant did not meet your expectations for a category.

-Presentation: The appearance of items on the plate; plating skills
-Originality: Creativity in composing the dish
-Appeal: How appetizing the food looks/whether or not the dish appeals to your personal taste as a voter
-Challenge Goals: How closely the entry followed the challenge goal(s)

The distinction between Presentation and Appeal: If someone submits an artfully arranged but burnt steak as an entry, it may score high in Presentation but low in appeal.

***
Copypasta Scoring Format for Lazymodo

Presentation: /5
Originality: /5
Appeal: /5
Challenge Goals: /5
Total: /20

This month we'll be trying out casual voting only.
****

The theme of April is..... Random a Spice!

Go to random.org/, generate a number between 0-9 and match your result to the following:

1. Ginger
2. Pepper
3. Vanilla
4. Basil
5. Garlic
6. Five Spice
7. Paprika
8. Chilli
9. Cinnamon
0. Rosemary

If the spice you random is unavailable to you, you may rerandom once.

While you're perfectly welcome to make a large spread of food, please make sure there is clearly a "main dish" because that is what people will be voting on.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=Mo6KUNqdsz0
pastebin.com/VTK7inJQ
i.imgur.com/wqE7hys.jpg
i.imgur.com/qmj9lnL.jpg
i.imgur.com/9zYnUbu.jpg
gardeningknowhow.com/edible/herbs/basil/what-are-varieties-of-basil.htm
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

BONUS CONTENT:

Introduction video explaining the challenge for you newbs: youtube.com/watch?v=Mo6KUNqdsz0

Photography guide:
Text version - pastebin.com/VTK7inJQ
Vertical version - i.imgur.com/wqE7hys.jpg

How to make webm: i.imgur.com/qmj9lnL.jpg

How to make verticals vertical: i.imgur.com/9zYnUbu.jpg

SHE HAS RETURNED!
PRAISE!!

...

Reposting the submissions from last thread

>1
Spice jar garlic roll.

Garlic Shrimp & Duck Liver Lap Ceung Sausage Cabbage Cups, Garlic Confit Marinated Grilled Scallions, Roasted Garlic Parmesan Crisps.

Walkthrough here:

>2

Ginger Pork Stirfry. Ingredients were pork, ginger, garlic, carrots, broccoli, soy sauce, olive oil (was out of vegetable), salt, sesame oil, and hoisin sauce. - Face on a String

>3

Poor Student Aglio e Olio - daggu

vertical

>4

Rosemary teriyaki skewers and carrots in a rosemary honey butter sauce - soccerpatches

a delightfully fluorescent geocitiesesque vertical

Oh good we're back. "Randomly generated" rosemary. Been too busy to deliver but I'll get to it eventually.

I got Basil last thread, so I went out and bought like six kinds of Basil plants.
Fucking Basil.

how many kinds of basil are there

I second this question

>gardeningknowhow.com/edible/herbs/basil/what-are-varieties-of-basil.htm
A lot it would appear.

that's interesting

well well well ya learn something new everyday

looking forward to your entry Toothpick

Bumping with timestamped pic.

>cooked in the microwave
>premade chinese sausage
>forgot to trim the garlic
Looks like I know what I'm not voting for.

For me it's the Milan Sezchuaun Sauce on a mcfisg and McChicken

t Reddit

W9w great job it only ttok you 39 min to do that? Great job.
Kill yourself you tasteless faggot. Go eat rat poison you degenerate kike. I hope you suffer before you die nobody wants you here. shills with be beheaded and put on pikes lining our beautiful highways in our beautiful Country

Kill yourself Reddit scum

I hope you kill yourself too. Go slit your wrists with every utensil in your kitchen.

Yeah uh huh you know what it iz.
Black and yellow black and yellow black and yellow black and yellow black and yellow black and yellow haters talk but there's nothing you can tell em. Errything I do I try to do big

Cicada 223 activated XIIV. IV. IV.
Operation Reddit-Dawn is a go.

Kill yourself. Do not vote or you will be banned for trolling. This is a friendly reminder of Global Rules 1, 2, and 3. And all of them. Read everyone before posting.

wtf is happening right now.

The same troll who is labeling the whole contest as "Reddit shit" is now impersonating tripfags such as myself and Toothpick.

Cool challenge idea OP. I look forward to the entries.

Jesus fucking christ...
I thought you died.

I'm glad the thread came back.

Yawn troll is... *yawn.

Then again, bumps are bumps.

As an internet boyfriend for Borneo, I can tell you that circus de ole isn't the same as circw.. fuck it. ole!

Cirque ala desolate.
Circus de ole.

I'm a very good person, you aren't.

What?

Basil

...

How's the texture on that? I would think not really churning it would make it icy

It wasn't icy at all but I made and ate it today. Reading online, it seems there's a general consensus that 'ice creams' made from condensed milk or evaporated milk can last for about two weeks. I imagine after that, it might start to get too hard.

That's what I was wondering.

Kind of looks like shaved ice.

Yeah I've made a lime ice cream pie with condensed milk without churning and it turned out mostly good but a little icier than if it had been regular churned ice cream. That's cool yours turned out well though.

Shits getting real this round here with the subs.

>real around here this round
Engrish fail

>forgot to timestamp
haHAA I'm 12 and what is this haHAA
Anyhow. Pork. Mind my shitty knife skills. Entry is for ginger. Fuck ginger tho realtalk.
>my pork doesn't look like this
Ok. It probably doesn't smell like a real pig either but what can you do.

Ginger, sugar and soy sauce. I guess I should explain what I'm going for huh.
Ever bite into a piece of ginger that someone left in the dish and go "wow I will never eat in this place again", and then it turns out they're the only chinese restaurant in town? No? Whatever, this is basically an attempt at getting the rawer side of ginger across, without making you want to kill yourself. As it turns out, ginger is very much an euuughhh spice and needs a bit of help to not taste disgusting and gimmicky.

I totally forgot to clear the exif data didn't I. Fuck.

Tortilla, green onions (god I'm awful with knives) and sweet soy paste. Some call it peking duck sauce. Those people are too rich to cook for themselves, hence why they can afford to go to china and eat peking duck, then never apply it to any other wraps. Because they probably don't cook. Because they are rich. Why can't I be rich?

Brown the pork. No, I did not put flour on the pork. Why would I put flour on the pork? If I did it'd burn in one of the later steps.

Strip it. Closeup because if I'm going to attentionwhore, I might as well do it properly.

Just enough oil on the bottom of the wok to tell when it's smoking hot. Add the pork, then dry-roast it with the ginger mixture. Obviously a more hands on process, so no pictures until I get it out the wok.

Aand it's done. No it's not a goddamn photo-op, in fact this is less than ideal - the shiny surface, while extremely aesthetically pleasing, is a sign of utter failure.

The goal of wok-roasting is to rapidly dry the liquid added to the pot so that the dry ingredients (y'know, the stuff that doesn't taste like water) sticks to the pork. Ideally you add so little liquid on such a hot surface that it forms a dry crust, as opposed to a shiny sheen. The ginger taste did get through, mostly because I had about three tablespoons of minced ginger in there.

Burrito it with the tortilla above. Wow this isn't very photogenic huh.

And a cutaway. I swear this is well done. Trust me on this.

Timestamp after I eat the entire thing because I forgot timestamping was a thing. The pork not quite as shiny anymore, and here's the half-a-green onion I'd included in .

Overall taste? I had too much duck sauce. The green onion was pretty strong too. Could definitely taste the ginger, but I'm betting if you had one made without ginger and then had this all you'd do is "oh isn't this quaint". Which describes ginger in a nutshell. Fuck ginger honestly.

Nice (((submission))). Now open the oven, turn the gas on high, and stick your head in it. This isn't /pol/ you fucking mouthbreathing fucking sack of shit. You gotta go back.

And in case you haven't figured it out yet cunt, this site has never been a right wing hug fest, you're given quarter out of the principal of the spirit of freedom of expression, and like welcoming you into a home and you acting like an asshole shitting on the floor and trying to fuck the daughter; you'll get shown the door, both here and IRL (if you weren't such a fucking pussy) no matter how much faggot milo "unpopular opinions" whining you squeal.

Dude, shut the fuck up.
No one but you seems to give a shit that some folks post across boards.
!Liq.7OU9Nw, thanks for the entry. Good on ya, y'cunt.
Saved for posterity, along with your other images.

>numbaz
Alright. I'll stand down. Here's a 'toon

Calvin and Hobbes was so great.
Shame it ended, but I suppose Watterson quit it at the best time.
>Manly Tears.jpeg

Grab your dicks, lotion and a couple tissues I'm about to start cooking my rosemary delivery, drunk.

Stay tuned, and let's hope I don't fuck up my tripcode security thingy and post my code this for everyone and their second cousin to see and impersonate me.

Agreed. Sorry numbaz. In the cups. Respect. It'll get a little dusty.

End thread jack

potatoes, carrots, onion, and rosemary in the rice cooker (fuck a crock pot)

No worries m8, she'll be right.
Capped and saved. Thanks for the entry.

Making bean loaf: from top clockwise:

slivered almonds, oatmeal, onion, nutritional yeast, red pepper, smashed kidney beans, garlic.

Sorry I'm kinda doing a mildly drunken cookalong, won't be too many posts, but you'll know when the final entry is in.

make your not-ketsup for the bean loaf, tomato paste, brown sugar, rosemary, balsamic vinegar

add a little water and olive oil to your loaf mess and tuck them little guys into the oven while you shotgun a couple beers.

I'll be back

I've never made a balsamic reduction before but I did so just now, infused with rosemary. Holy shit it's amazing. bean loaf is still baking, and I'm still drinking and setting up my photo area.

T. someone who's taking this way too seriously.

I thought we told you to fuck off?

Go back to your tendies, the adults are talking.

who the fuck on Veeky Forums says this? That's like saying go back to fine dining, McDonalds.. jesus christ you people are so out of touch.

Word is some asshat doesn't like the cooking challenges, so they impersonate and troll these threads.

>update, the not-ketsup is on the bean loafs and shits almost ready.
>I gotta drink faster.

Wait I think you responded to the wrong reply kek

beginner chef here, wish me luck

Paprika, my specialty

Use a trip so that they know who you are if you're entering. I don't think it's mandatory but it helps. What did you "random" user?

Never mind me I think I'm buzzed and confused.

Hell yeah, I was gonna make roasted rosemary paprika almonds but decided it was too much of a 50/50 with the spices. Trying my best to make rosemary the prominent thing here.

Still want to try them almonds tho

im the user from
and that sounds like a good idea

Tripfag

I think he has a point. These threads force tripfaggotry up to a point, and we're already getting trip worshipping like in and .
p. sure this is my last entry.

Rollin

Hopefully I get ginger I wanna make ginger oyster sauce chicken

Very true, myself I've literally never tripfaged before discovering these breads.

I'm all for the anonymous nature of 4dicks, but participation in this thread and the "amazing race" thread has been a great relief during a stressful time for me.

ind4 back to tumbler fagget

I don't care about the opinions of strangers on "anonymous" Russian potatoe critique forums though..

Are you doing Russian potatoes now

idk about Russian but prepare your dickhole for what I'll enter in about 15 mins familamidingdong

It took entire minutes of shopping and several berations from the roomy to produce this.

You'll not be let down.

I got pepper.

I've an idea brewing - take something known to be not spetacular and make it pretty good.

toast sandwich w/ pepper.
you're welcome.

No, I was thinking of making deviled ham, because while I've crackers at home I don't have bread on hand as it's 05:40 here and it'll take a while before the bakery opens and I'm feeling lazy so I'll make do with what I've got at home.

Lazy is good, but you've got the whole month to enter.

Fair enough - though, I guess my running schtick will probably be "making do with what I've got at home" in these challenges, I always like doing that.

Final product:

Rosemary bean loaf w/ Rosemary carrot, potato, onion mash w/ Rosemary infused balsamic vinegar reduction drizzle.

There we go, that was quick - deviled ham spread made with parmesan cheese, cream cheese, chives, onions, ham, cayenne pepper, salt and some mustard.

Also found some bread and made a sandwich.

It's a pretty good breakfast.

I believe that's literally the essence of culinary culture if I'm not mistaken.

Seeing how these threads are now monthly with no crossover scoring, trips and identifiers are no longer necessary. I suppose for this round it helps to see who rolled what, but I don't think anyone really gives a shit.

bretty gud intro, also i randomed chili so i can participate without having to sell my organs for vanilla beans

You might want to plate that shit nigga, this contest is largely about the visual aspect of cooking.
Make up an identifier for yourself; a name, a trip, something funky in the image.
Otherwise it's a bugger to pick you out of the crowd, mang.

Your timestamp needs a date, senpai.

Honest question: what's the problem with using a name or tripcode? It in no way changes the principal of anonymity (such as it is) of the site

>probably doesn't smell like a real pig either
Be glad. They're usually covered in pigshit.

If it isn't rosemary crusted pork, we don't care.

Noticeable lack of meat. 0/20.

If I told you you smelled like a pig, would you take that as a compliment?

How am I supposed to eat this
Is one of them a dip
What's happening

With a fork.

Or your dick, however you usually eat mashed potatoes.

pigs are actually pretty picky and dont shit where they sleep, unlike any other animal.

Wait
The three tupperwares contain the same two dishes
Except one is the plated version and the other two are straight out the oven