Why do my bananas have slits in them? I've never seen this before

Why do my bananas have slits in them? I've never seen this before.

Your household encourages depression.

Ebola injected probably

That doesn't seem like a Fair Trade

Stretch marks

Bad feng shui, burn them in the easternmost room in your house to let out the evil spirits

It's a metaphor

Freezing, probably.

They're good for nothing but making banana bread at this point.

check for spiders
im pretty sure there's a spider that does this, not even kidding

well nobody specified what exactly will be traded fair, maybe it's bacteria :^)

Banana rot. Harmless as long as you didn't make direct contact with your skin. If you did, then you might develop a leprosy-like rash that causes large gashes in the infected area, eventually reaching to your muscles, cartilage and bones. Luckily you live in a first world country so it's nothing a rigorous bout of antibiotics and steroids won't clear up in a jiffy with a 75% success rate. Some days it pays to be white.

What is this post even trying to satire

looks like a squished smiley emoji face crossed with an ayy on that there 'nana

Kek.

Either they were stored too cold, or too damp, or they had too much water content, or they're full of poisonous spiders (not kidding about that). At any rate, since the fruit's been exposed, I'd chuck them and buy new ones.

Obviously banana spiders. just google it you retard. Are americans really this dumb????

clearly they want to be a banana split

easy access to stick your dick in it

Theres a spider in there

Means they have dried out.
Do you live in an arrid climate?

Cringe/8

Happens all the time here in TW, they grow the bananas locally and so don't need to fumigate for overseas shipping or anything since the spiders are endemic anyway. Don't worry, the venom is mild.

im gonna goddamn kill myself

Your bananas are so ripped that they are tearing apart their peels.
These are bananas of major gains.

Underrated

I used to work produce in Sainsbury's (I think I recognise that package, family size). Saw a couple of spiders but mostly white silky sacs. Don't know if they could hatch, I'd just scrape them off on the side of the box.

Are the spiders fine to eat if they're not mature yet - if they're not trying to pry their way out of the banana yet?

This. Consume the Mighty Bananas after cooking them with some monster parts for an elixir that boosts your attack power.

Banana spiders.

That reminds me of when one time this really depressed self-mutilating girl i rode the school bus with wanted to show me her arm cuts and she put her right hand flat on the inside of her left wrist, pulled up towards her fingers, and all the cuts opened up. You could see the different layers of her skin, fat, and some blood.