COFFEE THREAD

I hate that bitch so much that I hate to even talk about her, about how great she is.
She is deceptive dark cunt that is trying to sneak into my life,especially in the morning.
Do you have relationship with her, do you *do* her every day?
Do you take her in your mouth. If you do do you get exited swallowing her, felling her juices flowing down your throat.

Do you like her black or do you go kinky on that 'bitch' and pour cream and sugar into her and with shivering lips you slurp her seductive moist liquid like some exotic nectar.
Coffee the bitch of all bitches, is she in control of your life, is she holding you by your balls making you to desire her every morning every freaking day.

Other urls found in this thread:

baristahustle.com/blogs/barista-hustle/the-coffee-compass
youtube.com/watch?v=st571DYYTR8
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

I fucking love shitty instant coffee, and no one is going to stop me from drinking it.

>cool user dude detected
actually I think that instant coffee is the latest modern sophisticated hottest way to drink coffee without spending hundreds of dollars on various stupid coffee making gadgets.

>just made this thread so people will give him (You)s for his omg so deep and profund wow OP

if you calling them suckers. welcome to the club.
>sucker
>do you love that bitch some call coffee?

OP's don't get (You)s though

Oh god i wish I could have coffee all the time but outside coffee is utter shit and carrying coffee around in a metal thermos ruins the taste and it stops tasting good after only 30 minutes.
The only time I can truly enjoy coffee is at home.
Pic related, my love affair with coffee~

I'm also mildly drunk and extremely horny I wish coffee was a cute girl (male) ;_;

Which one is the coffee?

I had the strength of a real man and I rejected coffee this morning.
How about you?
Did you act like a pussy today and give in to her seductive powers

Man, you need to chill out, just a little.

>you're

sorry snowflake to disturb your delicate nature.
KEK

My friend recently got kidney stones and she claimed it was from drinking coffee.

Could this be true? If so, how much coffee do you think she had to be drinking without also drinking water? I'm terrified of getting kidney stones, they scare the shit out of me.

>Eat a shit-ton of popcorn
>wake up next day and have a big cup of coffee
>~30 mins later go to bathroom and take a massive shit that just shoots out of your ass in one big chunky waterfall
>mfw feel completely empty and so fucking satisfied

>Could this be true?

I'm not a doctor, but doesn't make any sense to me. I'm guessing she just made it up because it made sense to her in some strange way.

My mother blames my father's cancer on the fact that he used to smoke. Yet he has cancer in his leg and he hasn't smoked in 40 years so that makes zero sense, but she sure is convinced!

Google risks for kidney stones; avoid those risks. Pretty damn simple.

Yeah shit, thanks for bringing me back down to earth. I tend to believe people's personal experiences more than I do with stuff I've read online (I fully understand the hypocrisy(irony?) of that statement, don't worry), but then I did some research of my own and also found a book relating to it. Water water water! Apparently wine is OK for keeping them away too.

I'll just make sure I keep drinking lots of water.

What's you're point?

Just started French pressing. Any tips or tricks a young boy (female) should know?

Play with brew time, grind size, ratios, etc. It's science class again, take notes.

Bitter = over-extracted
Sour = under-extracted

Coffee has successfully replaced my cigarette fetish. When i think about how many i'd be smoking.....ugh

>Any tips or tricks a young boy (female)
what's this homo advertising on Veeky Forums disgusting crap "young boy (female)", so you are a homo shit packer looking to hook up with other homo shit packers who use french press plungers to
insert into their anuses, what is this shit talk "young boy (female)", make your fucking mind up or you a boy or you are female you confused fuck head.

how does my sister drink coffee at fucking 1900 then go to bed 2 hours later

Dude, relax. No one is going to touch you in your special place without your permission since you are presumably over 18.

ADHD symptom reversal seems to be common in more than just the kids with adhd. Caffeine, tea wise, knocks me out. Coffee makes me drip pit sweat and yawn, but I usually recover and continue to roller coaster.
They feed adhd kids amphetamines because of this.

stop sticking your dick in coffee

Take your homo disgusting shit to homo disgusting boards.
Talk coffee here you filthy faggots, not your filthy homo fetishes.

hope you all die very soon

Maybe if you stopped pouring boiling bean water on your dick you could calm the fuck down like the rest of us

so you are also a member of the french press homos anal club pretending to drink coffee

no i prefer to save my anus for pouring vodka into thank you very much

Coffee doesn't seem all that fuckable

>stop sticking your dick in coffee
>Coffee doesn't seem all that fuckable
That's a filthy code talk by filthy homos.
coffee = anus

Recently bought this Bodum's Pour Over coffee. Works quite fine like the Chemex does and it's cheaper. Certain grains work better with dripping methods than infusion methods. so it's up to trying which works well which your cawfee

>Works quite fine like the Chemex does and it's cheaper
But user, a thin mesh filter has nothing in common with the thick Chemex filters. They result in completely different cups.

oh yeah that's true, paper filter gives you a cleaner cup and the metallic filter gives you an oiled and sedimented cup. I havent compared yet but due to the size i think the chemex filter fits well on the bodum's

>he doesn't know about the french mating press

you can just use regular paper filters, I use a #4 cone filter in mine to keep sediment out

I always appreciate a coffee thread, but this OP is cancer. Where did all this Reddit come from?

Idk what's worse, the anime cowfee retard or this fedora poetry slam faggot

Coffee + salted peanuts

Is there a better snack combination?

At least the gochiusa pics are all in good fun.
This is just pseudo intellectual garbage.
Drinking coffee doesn't make you special or unique.

I don't really care about the anime, just spell coffee right so it comes right up in the catalog

>Reddit
what's Reddit ?

yup, instant coffee is coming back around as a trendy way to drink it.

i feel you man. the most awkward 20 seconds you'll ever spend with yourself, followed by complete serenity.

Yes, coffee + salted penis

I really hate coffee.
Why you faggots drink that crap

It tastes good if it's made correctly.

baristahustle.com/blogs/barista-hustle/the-coffee-compass
you can also try youtube.com/watch?v=st571DYYTR8

moka pot makes much better testing coffee in my opinion.
french press is nothing special, just pouring hot water over coffee grounds is very primitive way of making coffee

Moka pot makes much better richer tasting coffee in my opinion.
French press is nothing special, just pouring hot water over coffee grounds is very primitive way of making coffee.

Turkish.

Woke up, enjoying some instant 3-in-1 coffee

The best coffee comes from the fashionable new french press. It's good because it has the word "french" in it which is autofancy. Also I use french roast which is extra fancy. I get my beans from starbucks which is a very sophisticated upscale coffee shop. I feel sorry for people who can't handle the sophisticated new french roast, french press coffee. They don't have obscure tastes like me.

You're right but I still prefer my french press because I don't always want the intense flavor the moka creates. I would recommend the moka pot to anyone who wants to upgrade from their aeropress

>Shitty french press has mold in it again
>Too lazy to clean it

I can just add sugar it won't madder

>Paying exorbitant prices for roasted beans
>Spending outrageous sums of money on roasted bean smashers and hot bean juice producing methods
>Making hot bean juice
>Drinking hot bean juice
Absolutely DISGUSTING!

yes Turkish/Greek coffee is good
the thing I'm wondering about is,if this "boiling" of coffee is not 'destroying' too much of the coffee oils and other good stuff
in moka or in espresso method the water temp is also very high, but in Greek coffee the triple "boiling" action might have stronger effect on coffee oils
any of you faggots/coffee freaks have any scientific info on this
Thx

I've never had coffee except for 2 sips total in my life.
Who here /independent/

well you are sophisticated coffee connoisseur who knows the latest trends in coffee world.
when I serve instant coffee to my guests they always compliment me on it, but I never tell them that this is instant coffee, they think that I'm serving them some expensive Blue Mountain-Platinum Private Reserve Selection.
many times they are asking what brand is it and to give them sample to take home but I always find some serious excuse not to do so.
drinking instant coffee is so popular now, finally people are recognizing how good how rich,smooth and convenient instant coffee is.
I prefer "freeze dry" 100%Arabica instant.

I don't use my french press coffee maker any more to make coffee.
I took the plunger out and I keep the glass carafe from my french press by my bed and at night after solid drinking if I need to piss I piss right in it,
it's very comfy because it has the handle and clear glass provides good visual of the urine level.

It's super comfy to make it too, no hassles at all, and fast

urinating in french press carafe makes me fell so cosmopolitan

Can't wait for summer to start so I can get my Nescafe frappe on. Best use of instant coffee.

>millennials

you should try it, pissing in french press coffee maker is so culturally enriching

I have self respect and put no coffee in my mouth.