Cooking chilli

>cooking chilli
>use spice paste method
>don't wash hands
>leave chilli to simmer
>suddenly get horny
>decide to go jerk it
>dick starts feeling uncomfortably warm
>mfw I've made chilli con penis
Lads it won't stop, what do I do

Dip your dick in yogurt.

Holy fuck I was actually thinking of this
Would it actually work? I thought it was just a tastebuds thing

step 1: find a girl whos DTF and ask if you can borrow her vagina real quick
step 2: chili con vagina

Then after use the yogurt as lube.

yes it would work, but so does time so I guess by now your dick has dick has... chill-ed

CARLOS

>touch habaneros
>touch penis

>Slice up habaneros
>Wash hands vigorously
>Eat food, shower
>Rub eyes before bed
>Oh fuck it's burning

I swear this shit never goes away until it's either in your eyes, nose, or dick. Ridiculous.

this is such a guy thing to do i swear

anyways wash your dick with milk and wash your hands before and after cooking or dick touching god damn it

>cooking chili
>add beans

I told my mom cayenne was the same as chili powder. I don't eat chili but I knew that would make dad yell at her.

habanero juice just never fucking goes away
you can wash your hands as many times as you like, that shit will still be in your eye in an hour or two

literally did this yesterday 2bqh.

Order some food handler's gloves right now while you're thinking of it. They're really useful, and not just for the whole chilli pepper thing

>cut chilis
>forget to wash my hands
>pick my nose 30 minutes later

stick your dick in a glass of milk

Female friends reported that capsaicin burn the vulva too.
Wear latex gloves to manipulate pepper, that's what they're for.

I like jerking off with chili. Feels good.

Pics?

>not dipping your dick and balls in a cold glass of milk

You're missing out, senpai.

Just get her to suck off the spices, and when she says, "Hey, your dick tastes like chili!" tell her "That's how I roll, babe."

>Wear latex gloves
They're like a condom for your hands!

...

I feel like this encapsulates the character of Veeky Forums perfectly

>be cooking
>go jerk off
>go back to cooking

put your dick in a glass of milk.

Happened to me the other day with Serranos after I made some pico. I swear 3 hours later after multiple handwashes I burned my eyes

I can confirm that dipping your dick in yogurt is an instant cure to pepper burn. I did it myself after 20 minutes of burning and nothing helping.