Always go and sit in the bathroom with the shower on reading my phone

>always go and sit in the bathroom with the shower on reading my phone
>have done this for years
>i honestly do this so when the world is in a post apocalyptic state, I can tell children that I used to waste thousands of gallons of water for no reason at all

Anyway, I decided I spend so much time in there, why shouldn't I be able to cook? So I'm getting a single burner. What are some good things you can cook on just a burner, in a pot or small skillet, in the bathroom while the shower is on and you're reading Heinlein novels on the toilet?

Chili.

Holy shit dude NOW you are thinking

I'd like to clarify for our audience that chili includes dark red kidney beans, light red kidney beans, pinto beans, and beef or deer burger.

I guess I'll have to do a thread for Veeky Forums when the burner gets here

Plus it makes sense because you're already on the toilet.

Yeah exactly, I guess as a challenge I should try to make the chili while taking a dump? that would be one long dump

yo btw if you ever cook in your bathroom you should know about "toilet plume", apparently when you flush the toilet it sprays microscopic turd particles around in a violent whirlwind up to like 8 meters away

Have you considered toast?

that's not quite high-falutin' enough, i was thinking multiple ingredients. though, i draw the line at cutting or anythign in the bathroom...i'll only prepare ingredients in the sterile kitchen first.

That's why you close the toilet before flushing

this is literally an episode of seinfeld. kramer installs a disposal in his shower.

haha epic dude you waste sooooo much water im laughing so much omg
this guy is gunna cook a full 5 course meal while the damn water is running what a crazy guy!

spending more than 2 minutes on the shitter is pure degeneracy

That's some /pol/ logic right there...please continue

Do you keep the shower running all the time or just when you're on the shitter?

If you spent longer on the toilet you wouldn't shart in the mart, user.

>waste
>water
You realize it's impossible to waste water, right? It's not like it gets deleted when it goes down the drain. The only thing you're wasting is money, you fucking donkey.

...

>wasting you're money like an idiot

let me guess , you're a nigger/spic

>go in bathroom for morning shower
>decide to have a fap first
>turn on shower and bathroom fan first so no one can hear me
>mom walks in on me because she assumed I was in the shower since it was turned on

go on...

nothing happened
I was just sitting on tht toilet with my phone, I hope she just thought I was shitting

D...did you discuss it later? You sure mom didn't make any off-hand comments about how 'big' you've grown or how lonely she's been since dad died?

yes I'm on nhentai and I have no shame

he probably lives in an apartment and doesnt pay W/S/T

>mom walks in on me because she assumed I was in the shower
...why would she do that in the first place

she didn't see my dick faggot, I had enough time to lean forward and hide it

apparently there was a toxic mess in the kitchen and she needed alcohol wipes urgently, bitch literally unlocked the door from the outside with a pin

>lean forward and hide it
How does that work? Did you bend over at like a 90 degree angle until your head blocked view of your dick like some kind of head over dick eclipse?

>unlocked the door from the outside with a pin
Does she know what knocking is? Your mom is a psychopath

underrated

No, no, the toilet doesn't face the door
When I'm on the toilet the door is to my left, so left leg was blocking my dick.
If the toilet faced the door I would have been fucking fucked

I really don't understand why she didn't knock, I was fucking pissed. I was so close and the entire thing made me go soft. I was running late too but I'll be damned if I wasn't going to finish, almost made me late

Those things blow man dong. Avoid it. They may be cheap but you can get a nice induction for like 50-60 bucks. 10x better. Cooks faster and better in every way.