I am dead inside. What should I read to change this?
Nietzsche, Camus, and Dostoyevsky have both failed to do the trick. I see poetry in their words, but they kindle nothing beyond aesthetic appreciation for their ideas, no fire, no change.
Pictured unrelated, but vaguely uplifting.
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David Wallace, no joke
Didn't he kill himself?
Listen to some animal collective and beach boys and drop some acid and you'll be born again into the world as a child
don't do this it will only make you more depressed
listen to something good on acid, like Black Foliage animation music
Clinically depressed man away from meds.
But the advice is legit.
aristotle, seneca, plato. Embrace virtues at all cost
>Black Foliage animation music
also this
start with the greeks
not even memeing
life for the greeks was dionysian life, where the gods were many and were real, like many ancient cultures that predated them. yet it was tempered by apollonian tendencies that enshrined it into history in a manner that renders their life intelligible to us. many mistake the finger for the moon and only focus on the apollonian and what is intelligible and plato/socrates/seneca which is a mistake.
>what should i read
is already a sign that you're on the wrong path, like many who devour "self-help" books to procrastinate actually "improving" themselves.
one does not learn, but is initiated.
Hate to break it to you, kiddo, but aesthetic appreciation is all that really matters—or at least, it is so much more important than all else that it dwarfs every other aspect of life—they drop out, as when one raises the variable of a polynomial to infinity: the one thing, the one value, alone remains. Orwell, in an essay on a pamphlet by Tolstoy that I have not read, said that the humanist spirit was (something along the lines of) that attitude that says human life is worth all the pain and ennui in the end, even though that pain and ennui should overcome the pleasure. The beautiful, having as it does a touch of pain in it, is all that one can hope for, and that is more than enough, and it is more than sufficient that you can see the poetry in those words. The poetic is the most real, anyways.
why do you want to change it?
the poetic isn't the most real, it's what inspires the poetry itself. it's the muse. the pain and anxiety disappears when one surrenders oneself to divine inspiration, rather than engaging in a sublimated form of masochism.
I'm bored, and the only I do feel is a bleary sense of loss.
Elle is bae
only thing*
but why do you want to change it?, do you loss something?. go with it and the sadness within.
is 50/50 tbqh
it can push you out of the spiral, but adjusting to real life is where it goes 10 times worse or actually makes you better
I've experienced both, lel
also
this
dont be retarded like DFW and DONT TOUCH SSRI
Elle will never be your gf, might as well end it all. Wanna do a suicide pact?
>you will never run your tongue over her dorky buck teeth and comment on them and make her all flustered and self-conscious while you say it's ok and it's cute while she pouts at the impression that she's unironically being teased
C O U N T
O
U
N
T
L E O
E
O
T O L S T O Y
O
L
S
T
O
Y
...
Grow up
yo stop
Become more emotionally mature
an emotional mature person can´t feel like shit?.
you fall for a meme.
>an emotional mature person can´t feel like shit?.
Of course. However, feeling like shit is one thing. Proclaiming to be dead inside while drooling over pictures of cute women on the internet is another.
>you fall for a meme
Your opinion goes in the trash.
you misguided an emotional mature person with being articulated enough to express your emotions in a mature way.
emotionally mature is a meme altough i know is a shit word and concept. social construct is not better. emotionally mature is an idol.
Fear and Trembling by the Kierk.
>emotionally mature is a meme
It really isn't though. If your argument is that it's not possible to mature emotionally then look at the way you would deal with your emotions when you were a child. Compare that to the way you deal with your emotions nowadays. I am sure you would agree you have become more mature in the way you deal with your emotions.
>i know is a shit word and concept
Stop using it then.
being emotionally mature is not a better thing.
if you have to make the separation between a child and an adult to make me understandable what is "emotional matureness", talk more about the low trust you have in the concept.
>giving a clear and obvious example means you have low trust in a concept
Is this a joke?
reducing transcendent concepts to mere "emotion" is a sign of emotional immaturity
Surely these transcendent concepts you bring up are part of the way you deal with emotions i.e. part of your emotional maturity
"
by "emotional maturity" i believe you mean that one deals with emotions, but by transcending it it is the opposite. one refuses to be ruled by emotions when one becomes "mature". so "emotional maturity" would be an oxymoron, and your use of the concept is nonsensical.
you don't call someone who has transcended their compulsive stealing "kleptomanically mature"
lmao at these cucks
Jordan Peterson's Maps of Meaning. It will change your life. Alternatively watch his youtube lectures
youtube.com
They're free, dude used to teach at Harvard, it's worth your time. It's basically one giant deontological reassurance that btfo of nihilism.
Interesting, I see your point.
>cuck detected
This shit is the reason most NEETs get depressed. Stop living in your fantasies. If you want to read something, read something dry and real. Suttree maybe
I want to floss her teeth.
black foliage but not animal collective or beach boys??
animal collective + beach boys (+mayb some mecury rev) = black foliage
IJ gets better after that scene with the school director or some shit?
>Jordan Memerson
Read Confederacy of Dunces.
It'll cheer you up.
No one in that book is happy until the end,
where nothing really happen.
Very similar to real life.
Perks of Being a Wallflower was another book that really picked me up when I was feeling depressed. You'll pick up something, maybe that you're just bound to be unhappy and have to happy with it.
Good luck.
Don't do drugs
>Nietzsche, Camus, and Dostoyevsky have both failed
Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
Read the Communist Manifesto, and give your life greater purpose.
You have to find meaning for yourself. You can't expect someone else to give it to you.
All I can do to help.
Chesterton
Honestly? Go read Nick Land.
I'm semi-serious about this, tbqh. Maybe people need a stronger dose these days to appreciate things. Read Meltdown and think about viral alien capitalism propagating through you. There's no reason that couldn't be the case. What if all that stuff were true? That's liberating. In a horrible way. But definitely liberating.
The fact that you have an I at all which feels dead suggests that perhaps you haven't looked deeply enough at stuff. Having an I and an ego that thinks, feels pain, is capable of making legal decisions, articulating sentences, or painting a fucking picture of your cat to give to your mother for Mother's Day are actually all more valuable and interesting than feeling dead inside. Go get dissolved in schizoanalysis. Try to look at things the way that Nick Land did. Stand in that hellscape for a while. Normal life might not seem so bad afterwards.
Rediscovering humanity isn't a bad thing. It's just that we take it for granted. Life is pain and suffering, but it's other stuff too. If existentialism isn't working, try Landian schizoanalysis. It has no cures and is itself probably just another meme, but what the fuck.
The other, and far saner, option is pic related. More the guy on the right than the guy on the left.
>Nietzsche, Camus, and Dostoyevsky have both
wut
nice
only read the intro
Eventually something really shitty is going to happen to you and you will realize how nice these days were.
IJ makes that feeling worse.
well that'll sure cheer him up
Hermann Hesse
>t. tranny tranneryson
You probably didn't get them. Name every book you read and describe what you've learned in at least 3 sentences each
>those shoulders
She looks like a trap
he is so fucking shit
worst tier
Read The Consolation of Philosophy by Boethius
Changed my life.
Infinite Jest. It unironically changed my life the way you are describing. Also don't do drugs. Ever.
what's wrong with weed and psychedelics?
>tfw did drugs
never been the same
The gospel of Matthew
Emil Cioran
Start watching Gianna Michaels porn. Yes she is fat and busted, but she makes the world seem better. Also listen to happy music. Someone beofre me mentioned beach boys. Lower your standards. Try more. Do things are are "below" your intellect.
her tits are saggy and her face is atrocious
Go to church, faggot
Jerk off to her exclusively for a month and come back.
I've done it but I regret it every time.
you are eternal , and your tiered go to sleep.
Because it fucks you up even more if you're already fucked up.
t. ex drug user
weird, psychedelics are reported to have pretty powerful anti-depressant effects, either post-trip for a few days or when micro-dosing.
That is living, my dude.
1/Read the Dao De Jing
2/Compare all available translations
3/????
4/Profit
Heideigger, Wittgenstein, Joyce and Pynchon. Thats your to do list.
Tracing my intellectual and 'spiritual' development desu.
Meant for
Came to post this.
...
you sound like a pretentious prick who doesn't even read properly. You should probably just kill yourself- then you can be dead on the outside too
Nothing for it but to order a pack of oestrogen and cut off your dick, OP.
Good man. Poetry and prose in tandem to describe Goodness? Awesome choice.
go for a run and get into a fight.
They're also reported to have terrible effects like activating schizophrenia and panicking for 12 hours. It can go either direction but the best I've ever personally see drugs do is that they numb or distract from the pain temporarily, not a long term solution
>implying LSD is in any way addictive or dangerous
I've done it several times and it changed my life (not that my life was bad or anything to begin with).
Opens up your mind and lets you scrutinise your self (sic).
Some people might not like what they see, though.
animal collective feels pretty different from olivia tremor control. maybe just their early stuff is sorta similar but whatever, this is a lit board! good taste though
>tfw waiting for life to get bad enough that I finally have the motivation to improve
is there no way to cut out the middleman?
the listlessness I currently occupy is full of anxiousness and nothing more
what drugs?
Kierkegaard
its all you need t.b.h.
what is this foliage crap? why is it so fucking chaotic? is this necessary?
I don't think a book is what you need, OP. If you're dead inside you need to change how you're living, not what you're reading. If someone said "read the Bible" I'd say "go to mass," if someone said "read about X" I'd say "go do X." Man isn't meant to live exclusively in his head.
Best wishes to ya!
I injected 50cc of dank maymays.
DON'T do MEMES kids, they will RUIN your LIFE!
If you're dead inside you should read a comedy like Don Quixote or Candide or something.
...
Tips from someone in the same situation.
1 don't do drugs. If you smoke weed it can mess with dopamine receptors. Look it up if you don't take my word on it. Also the first week after stopping is filled with feels and awesome dreams.
2 don't masturbate. read up on this as well. There is a lot to it that really messes with your ability to enjoy life.
3 don't think in the past so much. When you are happy you are in the moment. There are endless things to consider and worry about. Only so much that is helpful until it gets in your way. Try meditation, but don't fall for new age bullshit.
4 drink lots of water and eat as healthily as you can. Serotonin is 80% about telling you how hungry you are. This is phrased awfully and is excessively simplified, but I'm tired and the point is pretty much the same. If you don't eat right, you will be pissed off by it more consistently than almost anything else. Same with sleep.
5 if you really want to feel better read feeling good by that one cognitive behavioral therapist that's name starts with a "B". Your thoughts influence your emotions, so if your a pessimistic neurotic sad sap who thinks in black and white, you will feel awful.
You can't read your way out of suffering. Everyone is trying to describe things that are perhaps indescribable using a fundamentally flawed medium. Everything that is conveyed to you is just an abstraction, symbol, and a reflection of experience. The less mental proliferations you indulge in the better. When you do chose to take up symbols and abstractions make sure they are symbols and abstractions that point to experience.
Basically go meditate, and stop worrying so much faggot.
best post full of simple wisdom
sadness is natural, nature cannot be wholly conquered
laugh and you will feel better, for whatever time is afforded you to feel better
fernando pessoa
I don't know why you think reading is the answer. In fact, it's probably the worst thing you can do.
You know what happens to depressed people who try to read? They either get more depressed, or they develop an unsubstantiated ego and warp their depression into some megalomania trip, sometimes becoming one of the many shit pseud writers out there today, or just going on to be a worthless faggot elsewhere.
The answer to your depression is life itself. You have to start living differently. Reading is idleness, it's practically anti-life.