Looking for Alaska pages 1-10

Which he knows from the Royal Tenenbaums.

I don't think the Velvet Underground is really John's type of band. He probably likes the pop ballads like Sunday Morning so he'll claim to like them but then can't stand stuff like Heroin or Sister Ray.

God this is going to be so fucking banal.

>I'm a kid in HS
>I'm socially awkward but a "nice guy"
>I'm a big fan of the violent femmes!
>oh, hi girl with quirky name I met
>will you be my manic pixie dream girl?
And then something "tragic" is going to happen that ends their relationship or tears them apart

Am I close?

Actually she basically blows him off, then he gets an awkward blow job from a Russian girl.

Then MPDG dies and everyone is all like oh, so tragic for about 80 pages.

So pretty close

t. Faggot

>awash in the delusion
this phrasing makes me genocidal

they don't even have a romantic moment?

That's surprising.

Someone just post a plot summary from sparknotes or some shit so we can kill this thread.

>an awkward blow job from a Russian girl
Romanian girl, user. Lara was Romanian.

Also, as plenipotentiary representative of the Romanian nation on this board I would like to take the opportunity to protest towards the misrepresentation of the aforementioned blowjob as "awkward". Let it be known across all nations of this board that the insinuation that a Romanian born and raised young woman of high school age would be at a loss on how to properly suck dick and would need "coaching" from one of her American counterparts is as preposterous as suggesting she would be in any way impressed at the size and girth of said American dick.

I think they do at some point, but from what I remember she is never seriously interested in him romantically. I remember she has a boyfriend through the whole thing, but I read it like 4 years ago when I was in highschool, so I don't remember much

How many pages a day should we read?

This is exactly the labored, pseudo-sophisticated tone an introverted (self-involved) teenager who was "really into philosophy" would use to write about themselves. I have a hunch it's a voice.
I'm sure John Green would put it more sympathetically, but this is a basic fiction technique.

He knows his readers.

wtf this is pretty good

>sweat dripped like tears from your forehead into your eyes
>i only went outside to walk from one air-conditioned location to another

this is readable in a YA sort of way, although the narrator is supposed to be likable but I hate him.

Because that's too simple.

Also they're insecure in their own writing. These people need Orwell's 6 Rules tattooed on their fucking forehead.

10-15 a day? or wherever feels like a good place to pause.

...

Top zoz
Also, why the fuck is John Green writing about a child sucking the dick of the self inserted protagonist

Because teenagers want to read about awkward sex because that's all they've ever experienced

Actually because John Green wants to tug his Johnson to the thought of 12 year Olds reading his sexual exploits. He's a weird fucker.

OP you mind dumping more than 10 pages. you somehow tricked me into reading now I need to see what happens next.

Just torrent the book.

>plenty hot, certainly
2 adverb, 2 furious
>a vicious ferocity
Superflous adjective.
>unair-conditioned
It should be "un-air-conditioned."
>With cinder-block walls coated thick with layers of white paint
Repetition of "with" in the same sentence is painful.
>you simply cannot draw these things out forever
Stilted beyond belief.
>I should have felt a gooey, sentimental sadness, perhaps.
"Perhaps" fucking kills the momentum of this sentence.

I liked John Green, then I read his writing. Hell, the scripts for his vlogs are more thought-out than this.

>inb4 some comment about 4-dimensional chess where he's actually trying to sound like the edgy teens who read his work
Even if he is, he could at least fucking hyphenate un-air-conditioned.

what's Alaska's tax policy?

>mfw this has more success than the Start With The Greeks and the Don Quixote reading groups combined

I borrowed this book from the library and I stopped reading, oh, at most 100 pages in. I was APPALLED at the filth I was reading, and I hadn't even gotten to the "good" stuff yet - thank the gods. Truly astounding. What makes me feel even more dirty is that when I checked it out my librarian, a male, commented about how I made such an excellent choice and that I had phenomenal taste. Wow. To think that there are human beings out there that don't wish to burn, nay, vaporize every single copy of this book every created. We spend hundreds of billions a year on NASA to act out our collective sci-fi fantasies but we can't spare a million to deal with this disgusting "literature" that I would be ashamed to use as toilet paper.

Hope you have a good lawyer, buddy boy. Paging John Green as we speak.

This would be better if it had stupid notes, highlighting, etc from whoever likes these novels for some extra fun.

Is this the book where he namedrops DFW, Neutral Milk Hotel, and James Joyce all in one chapter?

*spits out drink* I didn't know JOHN GREEN could write like THAT