Oh God, I feel like I'm losing my intelligence to depression. It's the only thing I have left...

Oh God, I feel like I'm losing my intelligence to depression. It's the only thing I have left. How the fuck do I get rid of depression and psychosis? The meds don't fucking work. I can't lose science. It's all I have left.

Over the counter stuff is never guaranteed to work, and pharmological approaches without therapy tends to not achieve much. Unless you're willing to invest some money, lifestyle changes. Other than that, steroids? I heard it could really help correcting neurochemical imbalances and make you feel like a million bucks.

I know where you're coming from though. I was pretty bummed going into college bc high school was just a mess. Then I noticed thinning hair and shit really hit the fan. Since then I've focused on personal development stuff - academics, working out, learning an instrument, focusing on me. It's really helped, and I feel really good.

My personal experience with depression was mainly overcome by the thrill of achievement after a lot of hard work, which came during a period following a string of losses.

Are you in school? Why do you need science? Do you have dreams and goals in mind? Are you following your plan toward achieving those goals?

Also, the whole "get outside and exercise" stuff might seem like total bullshit and non-advice, but if you can force yourself to do it, it might help. I personally made an experiment of it. Went running a few days a week and gauged my general feelings as being slightly better; things that would previously set me off, or grind my soul were just a little easier to brush off. Part of it might be that I was out of shape and had poor self-image; getting into a healthy range felt pretty good.

Basically I think it really helps if you get into a mindset of setting goals and working towards them, ideally with some sort of reward mechanism. Try something like that maybe.

It's a psychological problem. meds won't solve it, only you yourself can

Can we get some ACTUAL doctors in here? Psychiatrists should die.

chant Hare Krishna and be happy

The mantra purifies the mind and consciousness, removing elements of ignorance such as depression and psychosis

This

I tried every med in the book. Made me worse. I quit cold turkey and realized the depression was better than being a zombie. I work through it now. Instead of agonizing over it, I remove myself from it AND say whoah, that's a pretty wicked wave I'm riding.

I'm ob the same boat.

I just want to die.
But I don't have the guts to end it...

I know you, you are that engineer from /adv/.
>Killing yourself because of no gf
Come on.

If it's any consolation I suffer from a similar anxiety, only I'm a writefag and the worry seems to concentrate there. It's most apparent during periods of low inspiration, especially when contrasted immediately against a few days over which I was inspired and prolific as fuck. I know it's bullshit and keep telling myself it's bullshit, but sometimes it's hard to ignore.
What's really affecting us though is inattention/apathy. There's nothing to do but force yourself through it, even while the worry makes it harder to focus and the difficulty focusing makes it easier to worry. Depression isn't damaging your intellect, it's making you not feel like using it. Will is the best asset we have in breaking the cycle and being productive again. Personally I find travel, or even just driving helps me a lot, and I can usually break myself out of it with straight practice. Describing the room I'm in with the intent of giving certain emotional impressions is a favorite exercise of mine, especially if the subject is somewhere I don't go often. Doesn't translate directly to Veeky Forums concerns, but yours seems like a similar phenomenon so I figure you might be able to adapt it somehow. Good luck.

>tl;dr:
You're not getting stupid, you're getting lazy. You just have to fight it manually.

Anyone know if this is a named phobia?

I will never have the life I've always fantasized about.

I will never have THAT girl. I will have to settle for one that I don't particularly care about.

I will never make THAT discovery, only some minor achievement after years of hard work.

So tell me Veeky Forums, why shouldn't I end it now? Why should ago through other decades of pain and misery, watching my body and my mind age and get frail, watching my parents die, watching the world being shaped by happy people who were lucky enough to live their dream?

I'm starting to lose hope...

>it's making you not feel like using it.
What you don't use, you lose.
This applies to any mental skill.

It's not just that, I feel like OP just described here

So you dont want to live because you wont be able to live in an unrealistic fantasy that you daydream about?

I'm and the answer is yes. I'm going to kill myself if half happiness is all I can ever hope for.

That's selfish, shortsighted, and stupid.

This situation you presented reminds me of this:
>Nirvana fallacy
By creating a false dichotomy that presents one option which is obviously advantageous—while at the same time being completely implausible—a person using the nirvana fallacy can attack any opposing idea because it is imperfect.

What does selfishness have to do with it?

You think suicide only impacts the individual? Maybe he is completely isolated, but probably not.

Perhaps, but I can't help it. I've always been like this, black or white, accepting greys only when I was forced to.

I know that I should "grow up" but I just find it meaningless. I would end up filling my days with people and stuff that I hate, only to keep dreaming about my fantasy life at night.

I just wish BCIs and VR were advanced enough, so that I could live my fantasy there instead of killing myself. They probably won't be good until a long time though, so there it goes.

I don't want to hijack OPs thread, so correct me uf I'm wrong OP.

In my case, its not about perfection.
I've fucked up my life by making decisions that might not have ben "wrong" but have resulted in a much worse result that what was very much possible.

Let me ask you something then:
Do you agree that abortion should be legal?
Do you agree with the statement: My body, my choice.
Next:
Do you think abortion only impacts the mother?
Now compare that with:
>You think suicide only impacts the individual?

Guess what, everyone has those regrets. No matter what you choose you'll always end up with regrets. That's life.

This is accurate, hence why you have to force the issue. Nothing magical is happening is the point. You won't loose the skill unless you allow it

Either determinism holds and there is nothing to do about anything, at any time.

Or free will exists and I've tucked up, and there is nothing I can do now.

So either way you're stuck with the decisions you've made in the past, might as well own up to those failures (if you consider them that) and use that knowledge to not make similar mistakes in the future.
No use crying over spilled milk, but you better clean that shit up boi.

You are a good person, I and I appreciate what you are doing for me.
Id even venture and say I like you.

I wish I had friends like you IRL.

I appreciate the kind words, and all I can really say is hang in there my dude.

Hold me Veeky Forums

This actually made me more depressed.. Because I felt ashamed for my bad behaviours.

Meds don't work m8

I was on benzos and they fucked me

I've attempted suicide twice now

You know what, you should kill yourself.

You seem to be in some sort of self destructive cycle. You need to stop thinking about yourself and just start thinking about progression in whatever satisfies you.

You are too stupid for this board if your critical thinking skills are this poor.

This entire thread is pathetic and self aggrandising. I'd encourage you all to kill yourselves, but I know none of you would have the guts :^)

Only brainlets don't have mental health problems.

I basically split my day in half. One half is lots of caffeine and nicotine and the other half adds weed and dxm/antihistamines. Another good option is alcohol.

I've tried antidepressants but they just level me out too much. The goal is to quell the negative voices in your head without losing that 'spark'. One great thing to do is just take every opportunity to do something novel. Even if it's just eating somewhere different. And exercising.

It's not all over, there are a million things you haven't tried. Perhaps read some fuckin Viking poetry or something. Don't be a chicken shit. My life is a fuck and half the time it's like yeah dude you should kill yourself no offense but you just have a bad life and bad luck and bad friends and everything is just bad for you and you can't hide it.

And try to find reasons to live. Know that's tough but that one's really important

You two are mentally retarded.

I've considered killing myself to get over my crippling fear of death. You know, like how you let a bee sting your hand to get over a fear of bees or sit outside in the rain to get over thunderstorms?

As a computer programmer with bipolar I can confirm being depressed reduces cognitive abilities. Or rather it takes much more mental effort to achieve the same results. Don't fear too much OP, it's temporary. Do some daily exercise, get some sunshine (or vit-D failing that), get out into nature once a week, and see a shrink. Once you stop feeling depressed your intelligence will be as razor sharp as it was before. Just focus on taking care of yourself for now, and the rest will fall into place.

psykikeatrists

Psychiatrists are doctor. And he is right, it's all about you and you. You need to make the effort to deliberately break (through thought and behavior) the negative spiral of depression.

The drugs are crutches. The crutches will not make you walk, they will help you to walk but it is up to you to make the effort to get up and move on.

Check your testosterone levels.

t. Veeky Forums

Lift your depression off you by lifting weights in the gym. Go to Veeky Forums and read the sticky and start moving some heavy ass weights