You're at the grocery store and this guy steals your avocado. What do you do?

You're at the grocery store and this guy steals your avocado. What do you do?

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Laugh

pick my avocado back up after the breath from me saying "hey dude that was my avocado" causes him to fly away like he was caught in a tornado.

Explain to him that my dark skin entitles me to this avocado and my ancestors planted these avocados

Father his child.

Give him another one and say "I'm sorry"

Not care because avocados are rancid ass shit

Oh I'm sorry OP, was your fucking NAME on that avocado?

What do you mean "steals your avocado"?

Ignore and make my way over to see that melon extravaganza.

Fearfully apologise.
I don't need no trouble with some tattooed sailor. They'll kill you as soon as look at you.

>steals your avocado
>your

did you pay for it?

If it's in my cart it's mine.

no it's not

>people actually believe that's how it works

looks like were gonna fight then, I'm afraid to say :(

i picture him running away holding the avocado with both hands, climbing on top of the frozen section and eating it with his hands while looking aorund like a squirrel

Pick up another avocado and throw it at him. And continue doing it, screaming "IT'S THE AVOCADO MAN, ALL AVOCADOS FOR THE AVOCADO MAN!"

>Being this Auchswitz-mode and still having a double chin
AIDS is a bitch

You're at the grocery store and notice your favorite avocados cost 8 bucks a piece because this guy made it impossible to hire cheap mexican labor to harvest American produce and also started a trade war with Mexico making Mexican avocados harder to find/more expensive. His administration's policies are also charging grocery stores to accept food stamps, limiting the amount of fresh fruit and vegetables that starving children will have access to. What do you do?

Buy the avocado and eat with a baked egg while laughing at videos of illegals and their families crying when they get deported and then eat another with a slight amount of paprika while laughing at white guilt and sjw rekt vids
feelssogoodman.png

laugh at his unmanly candy ass because he is a week little nu male bitch.

>melon extravaganza.
Sound like a cheep titty bar

VEGANISM.

NOT EVEN ONCE.

>What do you do?
Ask for the 'peach

He's a small guy

Id honestly laugh if i ever saw this thing in real life, and even if im a 5'6 manlet, he looks shorter than me.

Plus im brown so hed probably bend over.

*unsheathes katana*

It amuses me that your best argument for unregulated immigration is "how else would we exploit these people for cheap labor?"
youtube.com/watch?v=d0TFayRZeS8

Yeah what the fuck? How does someone with such thin arms have such a chubby face? Does he really have AIDS dyslipofuckedupia or something.

What is that thing?

Probably threaten to punch him with a punching gesture and make him drop his avocado...then apologise and get on my knees to pick it up and repeat it was just a joke, hand it back to him and then as he's holding it swat it out of his hands, then say sorry again and keep handing it back to him and to see how many times it takes for him to stop saying 'it is fine heh...'

It says Johnny Righini

Most likely

Hey, baby. Avocado for your thoughts?

Is this viral marketing for the new aphex twin EP?

Might be bulimic, throwing up a lot can make your face get puffy

damn she's hawt

That guy is some freak of nature. He has no muscles on his body of any kind...or perhaps just barely enough for locomotion.

>You're at the grocery store and this guy steals your avocado

No he doesn't.

I don't believe that person shops at the same grocery stores I shop at. I mostly see middle aged middle class white and asian folks in my grocery stores, just living a normal 9-5 life and then shopping for their avocados like normal people do.

I think I'd let him have it, he looks like he needs all the avocados he can get

who is this guy and does he have a disease?

>normal people
>shopping for avocados

Nah, he's just a vegan freak

instagram.com/johnnysjoys/?hl=en

He's a raw vegan. Doesn't have AIDS (AFAIK). He was a meme a few years ago.

Yup.

I saw him once. I think he's shorter than that. He's horrific looking.

Cushing syndrome. He takes some sort of med for something. Forgot what. I know he has OCD, though.

A raw vegan.

Yes. Orthorexia nervosa.

Yeah and the meme was AIDS. Srsly tho, fuck that guy.

Punch the fuckers head off like Jason Vorheese

Show your muscles, big guy. I see skinnier arms than that every day.

>blocks your path
>fee fi foo fum! eat a pickled plum or i'll fuck you in your bum!

>this creature is more confident in its appearance than I am in mine

I legitimely feel bad about this person

I gain confidence just from looking at it, I just think "at least I'll never be that freakishly ugly"

>he

That thing is a female to male tranny

Truly the nu-est of males

I really can't see him stealing.

>guy
That's a tranny

When did David Arquette get pregnant?

retards this guys a FtM transgender

this is "his" instagram

instagram.com/johnnysjoys/

There is literally nothing I can do to him that life has not already done worse. Death can only be a sweet release for the likes of him.

Sneeze near him and watch as he instantly dies due to his AIDS.

>reddit doesn't read the thread
Shocker

I pick it back up after that thing has collapsed on the ground from exhaustion after carrying a fully grown avocado for about 5 meters.

I'd buy it for him, ask him if he is going to the Swans concert later, maybe make small talk about the 2020 Prez election or how its perfectly acceptable to charge $10 for a house show *tips sea*

>Grab the last of something and throw in cart
>someone just takes it out
>"sorry bro, you didn't pay for it so it's free game haha"

Kek, underrated

This. How can you faggots fuck up shopping so badly? Are you actually that autistic? Or does your mommy still shop for you? That would explain why you don't have a clue how people interact.

Cool avocados, Ahmed. Want to bring them to the White House?

scream and run away

>not going on an avocado hunt on wednesday evenings

I BET YOU FAGGOTS WOULD NOT DO SHIT.

DUDE IS Veeky Forums AF!

If you took something out of my cart, especially if it were the last one on the shelves, things would get instantly violent. What the fuck are you thinking?

omg my boner

it would be wierd to just pick a fucking avocado out of someones trolley anyways

id pretend to be a chicken and peck him with my face.. CAW CAW

Whoa no need to pull your gat, Dayqumarion.

Way to misinterpret my comment you illiterate fucking mongoloid. I agree with you. Why are there so many morons in the middle of the night?

Wow
Such mad
Such no love life confirmed

>Why are there so many morons in the middle of the night?
It's midday here in the Northern Hemisphere. You Southern Hemisphere cu/ck/s always find things to complain about. Stay jealous of northern pride!

How exactly do you think time zones work?

>being this dumb

...

Walk away, that guy has tats. Not the type to be messed with

It can have it. Whatever.

What is he doing with that avocado? We know he isn't going to eat it.

lost

u got me fuker

Damn.
Ethan Klein has lost some weight.

Stop eating avocados, asparagus, etc (to be fair the only veg I buy regularly that were affected were those two) base meal plans on produce that remains cheap.
It was pretty easy.

bean him in the back of the head with a mato as he walks away

nothing, just laugh since he'll be the first to die on the day of the rope

I never expect to see an Ayyyden in Veeky Forums. Well, I think I'd hit him with my purse and shove the avocado in his mouth.

then i'd toss each avocado the store has in stock at the security officers.

Kek

Avoid contact with the patient, call CDC, call FBI, go to decontamination station

How does someone have arms that weak and thin?
I don't lift or exercise but i work a physical job and my arm is twice the size of his.

Stab him

AveragehuWOmenintheuniversewherehillarywon.jpg

Can someone photoshop this guy into a human being?

I'd be pretty annoyed, I just spent 47 minutes picking up every avocado and feeling the density and weight and estimating the time left until I have to eat it. I'd probably shake my fist at him when he turns his back.

ask myself why i was buying an avocado

he doesnt look like he has enough strength to lift an avocado

I'm black so that would never happen

>My cart
Do you bring your own cart to the grocery store?